abeautifulchick:

You are really sounding immature now.This is my boyfriend,my best friend,my confidant,we share everything together,he knows my needs even before i ask and he always fix it and i offer my best support when he is in need also.most men especially rich ones feel insecure when their working class girlfriends dont ask for anything,he even bought me a car when i dint ask for it and its only natural that i acknowledge it and appreciate him.IF YOU HAVE A BOYFRIEND THAT TRULLY LOVES AND APPRECIATE YOU,YOU WILL UNDERSTAND.I only came online because i needed advice and not to insult or be insulted by anybody.PLS BE GUILDED.If you check my handle ,you will see that i have always been an inactive nairalander.Thanks.

He bought you a car and you accepted the car? Why did you accept the gift? You should have returned the car and asked for attention instead.

Awon selective collectors

Fish brain tins, pseudo-relationship expert tins, cluelessness tins, this thread is full of dis tinz. .


Men and your older on here are telling you what obtains in the real world but you'd prefer the romance novel and theoretical relationship realm? smh. Iro ni e like, why are you girls so desperate for lies.

Please, don't kill me with your hilarious posts o! I hear you .

coogar:






because we men are not fools!
we know the importance of finance in relationships. no romance without finance especially when dealing with the hypergamous nigerian women.

behind every successful man, there's a woman - that's because women always chase successful men. there's even a research out there that says women enjoy sex more of her partner is rich/successful.

abeautifulchick:

Wouldnt blame you though.i blame myself for bringing a delicate story here.So have fun all you want.

don't blame yourself na.
we are here to help you.

bournvita:

He bought you a car and you accepted the car? Why did you accept the gift? You should have returned the car and asked for attention instead.

Awon selective collectors

there's a car shop in nigeria - attention is their currency. just pack attention in a suitcase & fiaaaaaaaam - you can get any car of your choice.

do you need their addy?

freshdude2:
Fish brain tins, pseudo-relationship expert tins, cluelessness tins, this thread is full of dis tinz. .


Men are telling you what obtains in the real world but you'd prefer the romance novel and theoretical relationship realm? smh

Attention is very important to women...

@abeautifulchick, he's never going to change. Then again, nobody has it all. If you can't endure it, let him go. Otherwise, go ahead with the wedding.

Don't mind them. When it happens, e go be like film trick.

Sophyrocks:


Let them keep being in denial while women cheat on them. E go be like nollywood movie for their eye.

abeautifulchick:

I have raised the issue couple of times but he keeps telling me he will change.

OP:

I was deciding to comment before I read this

It is a lie of the devil for anyone to tell you 'I will change after marriage'. There is no magical agent of change that transforms people after they say 'i do'. If your bobo has some attitude you do not like; discuss it with him. If there is no change, decide if you can live with it without complaint. If no, run as fast as your legs can carry you.

Once in, na to carry your cross. Even if you divorce, what has spoilt is spoilt. If you decide to stay, you will be carrying the pain.

We are here debating what all women/men like as if a worldwide poll was conducted. You and you only know what you want; if that man cannot give it to you, run. No NLer will be with you tomorrow when you are crying o.

Once again, 'I will change after marriage' is a lie of the devil

A word is enough for the wise

abeautifulchick:

Wouldnt blame you though.i blame myself for bringing a delicate story here.So have fun all you want.

Please please please, ignore some comments here that attack your person and do not help your situation. Some are here to mock you and turn the thread to a gender thing reeking of frustration. Just pick the ones relevant to you and discard the rest.

coogar:


ambition is relative, i agree....
being successful is also relative. however, if we are talking about the ground-breaking successful men, they rarely have time for lovey dovey. how many times would obama be playing snakes & ladder with michele?




i had a game to play with a friend in japan that evening.

Japan ko Taiwan ni

Abeg make I dey watch my apprentice jare

FynBabe:
Please, don't kill me with your hilarious posts o! I hear you .

i am not a murderer.

damiso:

Japan ko Taiwan ni
Abeg make I dey watch my apprentice jare

apprentice don start?
how's lord sugar? has he reduced his belly? football won't let me switch to BBC now. skysports till 10pm

coogar:


and this is a very good point!

some women cannot adapt to the taste of their partners & they never seem to get quality time with him. if her partner loves football, he should start following football too - adopt a rival club & let the banter start.....

but na lie o....
the typical naija babe wants to watch yoruba magic when a champions league game is on. they monopolise the remote control so they can see the latest episode of the kardashians. why would any guy want to sit at home & watch such?

but but coogar, why do I have to be the one to bend to your taste?

Why can't you watch telemundo with me? Equality, remember?

coogar:


don't blame yourself na.
we are here to help you.



there's a car shop in nigeria - attention is their currency. just pack attention in a suitcase & fiaaaaaaaam - you can get any car of your choice.

do you need their addy?

Lol coogar leave me.

She said he gives her everything she asks for. All that he spoils her with comes from the same business she is bitching about.

Since she wants attention she needs to stop asking for and/or collecting handouts and focus squarely on attention.

@floodgater thanks,i will consider that
@pickabeau1 and mizmycoli thanks also.I need advice but some people are just writing off topic except for few.PLS guys,If you dont have any good advice,just view and walk away.

pickabeau1:


Lol........... I don't think she is ready for that step


She should free d guy
He even bought a car for d babe...

That is if this story is true....

A Car ke? free? op , you dey annoy me seriously

my first car, I bought after years of trekking ....at age 28, with my own savings ..even 2 drop me at home when I was single, na complain. money for tfare, nko? O.Y.O.....but I still hope for a better tmrw n a better companion.
have never had d luxury of whomsoever I date take care of me financially .....even take money for weekend - zero. Although it made me stronger and self sufficient. but I still thank God I went through all dat. cos I can be happy and at peace with any tough situation I see myself in. if the tough situation is a life threathening scenario? then am gone like d wind...with no regrets

op, thank your stars for wat u av...theres no complete 100percent man out there....I don talk my own oo

Sophyrocks:


Please please please, ignore some comments here that attack your person and do not help your situation. Some are here to mock you and turn the thread to a gender thing reeking of frustration. Just pick the ones relevant to you and discard the rest.

Thanks alot.

BABE3:


2 years is all they need. After the honeymoon phase; when attention becomes useless.

Buncha Disney girls.

I don't even fault some guys for not giving the attention. A good number of girls have nothing upstairs apart from brazillian hair and telemundo. Why won't they prefer to spend time with their friends, when their gfs can't even hold intelligent conversations?

^^^So what happens to the really smart & talented ones whose boyfriends/husbands still chase after the money. By your theory, that shouldn't be, right?

Its not about the ladies...

BABE3:

but but coogar, why do I have to be the one to bend to your taste?
Why can't you watch telemundo with me? Equality, remember?

telemundo sucks - but if the offer comes with a quickie, most men will stay at home & "give attention"

bournvita:

Lol coogar leave me.
She said he gives her everything she asks for. All that he spoils her with comes from the same business she is bitching about.

Since she wants attention she needs to stop asking for and/or collecting handouts and focus squarely on attention.

theLORDreigns:


^^^So what happens to the really smart & talented ones whose boyfriends/husbands still chase after the money. By your theory, that shouldn't be, right?

Its not about the ladies...

who ever said it was a theory? Sometimes its about the ladies, other times its not. I was giving one of the reasons why a guy would prefer his friends' company.

FynBabe:
Don't mind them. When it happens, e go be like film trick.

The worst part be say na the ones wey dey beat chest pass na im women dey cheat on well well. dem no go know.

Them go beat chest so tey people wey know their wives' escapade go dey do Yimu for their back.

MizMyColi:

Your partner is a Thinker, You're a Feeler. In most cases, matches like that?
Not advisable.
But then, all that is needed to make a relationship work is two mature minds.
Feelers et thinkers or not

Abeautifulchick, I feel your pain, especially seeing as I've been there.

I let go, yes. But that's not saying you should too, in the end, it'll be your call to make.

Unlike our thinking female counterparts, feeling females have this need for extra attention. It takes a man of insight and deep understanding to know and accept this.

Virtually all the guys and some females on this thread are making you feel like you're shitty, like you don't have a life of your own........but I think I understand you. You want attention yes, but you don't want him abandoning and loosing sight of himself because he loves you.
More than financial security, you desire emotional security
Any guy who gives you that has won your fierce loyalty for life.

You just wanna feel like you matter to him. That you're also a priority in his life. You want him to let you in, in on his world.......you don't mind adjusting, you don't mind living for him.
But then, more oft than not, it feels like He's shutting you out.
Albeit unknowingly on his part.


My dear, please follow your heart.

It all depends on you, I repeat.









In other news, please remind me while saying my night prayers, to pray, not to marry the kind of guys who have prominently featured on this thread
SCARY!

They may be good for other ladies, not me and vice versa.

Lovely as usual

If money was so important, Dangote would not be on wife no 3 or 4

If money was all the OP needed, she would not be here now.

God will answer your prayers dear

BABE3:


who ever said it was a theory? Sometimes its about the ladies, other times its not. I was giving one of the reasons why a guy would prefer his friends' company.

Better.

Sophyrocks:


Please please please, ignore some comments here that attack your person and do not help your situation. Some are here to mock you and turn the thread to a gender thing reeking of frustration. Just pick the ones relevant to you and discard the rest.

coogar:


i am not a murderer.



apprentice don start?
how's lord sugar? has he reduced his belly? football won't let me switch to BBC now. skysports till 10pm

Hubby too I left him downstairs.I think I am considering going back downstairs just running round like headless chickens but I need to watch the dressing down lord sugar will give them.

Anyways OP goodluck. First year of marriage everyone wants attention...3 years down the line, we start checking for pocket size. Dont worry...your time will come, mbok.

My honest advise to you is; if you want attention, return all that he has given you to him and collect no more only then will he take you seriously. But as long as you keep rubbing vaseline on his bald head and he still greases your palm with a bundle of 1000 naira notes, he aint gonna take you seriously cos he is going to think that you love money more than attention.

Your relationship is all about the benjamins

BABE3:


2 years is all they need. After the honeymoon phase; when attention becomes useless.

Buncha Disney girls.

I don't even fault some guys for not giving the attention. A good number of girls have nothing upstairs apart from brazillian hair and telemundo. Why won't they prefer to spend time with their friends, when their gfs can't even hold intelligent conversations?

Do you get turned on degrading and downplaying women?

I honestly do not seem to get it

bukatyne:


Do you get turned on degrading and downplaying women?

I honestly do not seem to get it

are your feelings hurt?

get out of here, before I tear your underskirt...

BeautifulChick, I have told you what to do. Leave that guy alone, and his gifts of course, and look for someone who's more inclined to furnishing you with the sort of attention you crave. He'll be hurt and confused but, that's life. Meanwhile, you deserve happiness and if your boyfriend ignoring his pals for you in the same venue is the way to that happiness, then purse it by all means.

bukatyne:


Lovely as usual

If money was so important, Dangote would not be on wife no 3 or 4

If money was all the OP needed, she would not be here now.

God will answer your prayers dear

Thank you for saying the bolded. If the op was all about the money, the same frustrated beings would have lashed at her and call her greedy. This is why its not usually good to go with what is popular! Even stereotypes do not help. Let the Op decide for herself what she wants.

OP i asked what do you mean by attention? I know you gave an illustration earlier (his friends and the airport episode) but another post said he was your soulmate you guys discuss a lot and he listens to you about decisions.

So I will ask again is it the quantity or quality of time that you spend together that is your problem?

bukatyne:


Lovely as usual

If money was so important, Dangote would not be on wife no 3 or 4

If money was all the OP needed, she would not be here now.

God will answer your prayers dear

Amen.Thanks

damiso:

Hubby too I left him downstairs.I think I am considering going back downstairs just running round like headless chickens but I need to watch the dressing down lord sugar will give them.

hehe......
be careful - don't slip on the stairs while gallivanting from lord sugar to skysports

bournvita:
Anyways OP goodluck. First year of marriage everyone wants attention...3 years down the line, we start checking for pocket size. Dont worry...your time will come, mbok.

My honest advise to you is; if you want attention, return all that he has given you to him and collect no more only then will he take you seriously. But as long as you keep rubbing vaseline on his bald head and he still greases your palm with a bundle of 1000 naira notes, he aint gonna take you seriously cos he is going to think that you love money more than attention.

Your relationship is all about the benjamins