EnlightenedSoul:


Unless I ignorantly walked into the thread of a devout Catholic, you can color me lost.

Ahh, one of NL's finest is a lil' short on grey matter today .

Well, if one's the overwhelmed poor girl who's being stuffed full of babies; or the husband, who feels emasculated because he has only girls - one'll tend to see the situation a bit differently .

EfemenaXY:


You see nothing - not that I owe you any explanations.

Now stop getting all weepy on me. It's irritating and I can't stand emotional men.

u can't stand any real man.. only wussies..
i don gist u wetin i wan talk.
best way out of this is to ignore..
quote me and ill still talk

BuddhaPalm:


Ahh, one of NL's finest is a lil' short on grey matter today .

Well, if one's the overwhelmed poor girl who's being stuffed full of babies; or the husband, who feels emasculated because he has only girls - you will tend to see the situation a bit differently .

e-xactly. the hubby and his wife needs to talk things over.. no judgement we pass from over here would make anything better. thanks man

kilokeys:


u can't stand any real man.. only wussies..
i don gist u wetin i wan talk.
best way out of this is to ignore..
quote me and ill still talk

Oh? So my depressing presence & curse isn't enough for you to find your own level?

Mtcheew.

You'll still "talk" because you're smitten. You can't help it. And yes, you've been acting like a wussie of late.

EfemenaXY:


Oh? So my depressing presence & curse isn't enough for you to find your own level?

Mtcheew.

You'll still "talk" because you're smitten. You can't help it.

i feel better now.. sure, i was smitten.. but im okay now.
anythint u touch, dies. i survived

Double

BuddhaPalm:


Ahh, one of NL's finest is a lil' short on grey matter today .

Well, if one's the overwhelmed poor girl who's being stuffed full of babies; or the husband, who feels emasculated because he has only girls - you will tend to see the situation a bit differently .

Excuse you.

And yet somehow (in your abundantly-full-of-gray-matter-condition), you've managed to jampack a fairly small paragraph with an overwhelming dose of ill reason

kilokeys:


i feel better now.. sure, i was smitten.. but im okay now.
anythint u touch, dies. i survived

Back to sender.

You've been dead for a long while. You're only just realizing it.

EfemenaXY:


Back to sender.

You've been dead for a long while. You're only just realizing it.

don't go all spiritual now.. are u scared of u?
come to think of it.. ill gladly die than hv u be the only female i can chat with on nairaland..

kilokeys:


don't go all spiritual now.. are u scared of u?
come to think of it.. ill gladly die than hv u be the only female i can chat with on nairaland..

And yet you can't keep away.

You really are a freak, Kilokeys. A freaking freak.

EfemenaXY:


And yet you can't keep away.

You really are a freak, Kilokeys. A freaking freak.

ill only stop when u stop quoting.
maybe u could ask around.. i nevr lack words.
its even weirder.. i am enjoying it.
so, kill the fun and dont reply..

kilokeys:


ill only stop when u stop quoting.
maybe u could ask around.. i nevr lack words.
its even weirder.. i am enjoying it.
so, kill the fun and dont reply..

I know you're enjoying yourself.

Crazy man.

EfemenaXY:


I know you're enjoying yourself.

Crazy man.

so we have a truce..

i hate how much i would love to make peace.

EnlightenedSoul:


Excuse you.

And yet somehow (in your abundantly-full-of-gray-matter-condition), you've managed to jampack a fairly small paragraph with an overwhelming of dose of ill reason

Lol, am only but a lowly stable-hand milady; and not full of grey-anything.

But I know you're not one of those feminazis who read everything with their party lenses on .

BuddhaPalm:


Lol, am only but a lowly stable-hand milady; and not full of grey-anything.

But I know you're not one of those feminazis who read everything with their party lenses on .

No need for felt, or feigned self-deprecation.

You're free to any perception of me your mind readily offers you.

kilokeys:

so we have a truce..

i hate how much i would love to make peace.

Mtcheew!

EfemenaXY:


Mtcheew!

just like batman and the Joker

kilokeys:

just like batman and the Joker

Alright then.

You're infuriating, but I'm not angry with you. Feel free to holler at me here on nland. I just don't do the pm stuff.

EfemenaXY:


Alright then.

You're infuriating, but I'm not angry with you. Feel free to holler at me here on nland. I just don't do the pm stuff.

kilokeys:

EfemenaXY:

Lol!Na wa o! I've even got one breathing fire cos I ignored his PM request. Now the guys claims to be disappointed in / with / for me!Na today?

What is she feeling like? ,wont mind seeing a photograph of this old hag for real. I guess You only get PMs because you litter NL with your sad and bitter tales,so dudes wanna know why she is so bitter.

meine:


What is she feeling like? ,wont mind seeing a photograph of this old hag for real. I guess You only get PMs because you litter NL with your sad and bitter tales,so dudes wanna know why she is so bitter.

Go and die.

Now fück off my face, you attention seeking creep.

Actually, have the last word on my behalf, fück face.

I'm done with you.

EfemenaXY:


Go and die.

Now fück off my face, you attention seeking creep.

Actually, have the last word on my behalf, fück face.

I'm done with you.

The old hag has been unleashed ,run.........children.......run. All her life is furked ,thats why she keep spewing furk.

NB: Before i forget ,you can try river thames.....go and jump

LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL Meine, Efemenaxy and Kilokeys u guys made page 5 totally worth it for me. LOL LOL LOL

stonecoldcafe:
LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL Meine, Efemenaxy and Kilokeys u guys made page 5 totally worth it for me. LOL LOL LOL

Na soo we se am ooo. Her cup is full and her chickens her coming home to roost. She will be here again tommorrow, hopefully we will make it to page 10. Thanks for watching the online dismemberment of EfemenaXY the bitter feminist.

mygeeZ:
Honestly i feel betrayed.. I am praying and asking God to give me grace to continue in this bondage of a marriage.
All the same marriage found on deceit cant stand the test of time.. Could divorce be an option now?

Dont go in that direction dude; e never reach divorce yet. What you need to do is talk to your wife.

Is she asking for some more time before she has another baby? Are you guys financially capable of handling another child? Has she told you how she feels having another kid for now and you are adamant she takes in? Whatever you do, just have a talk with her. also she needs to know postinor is just an emergency form of contraception not one to be used in the long term. Goodluck.

shizzleStar:
When they both agree on 4kids and they get them, then they can start family planning. However, its the mans prerogative to make the final decision if they don't agree on a number of kids and not the wife's. Also tell me in which part of the world only wife does family planning.

Okay, let me get this straight.

In your opinion, you think having four kids is the standard number of children applicable to a couple irrespective of their financial circumstances or any other curtailing factor, (assuming they both agree on that number). But in instances where the man wants a higher number say 12 and the woman only wants 2, 3, or 4 the woman must go ahead and birth those 12 kids simply becauseit's the man's prerogative to make the final decision?

Now you tell me in which part of the word something as ludicrous is / should be upheld simply on the man's say so - if not for the Dark Ages? Or better still, tell me what happens if it's the woman who wants more kids and the man is happy with fewer? His decision still overrides hers?

shizzleStar:
...and why wont i think women deserve a career? or haven't you seen where successful women combine both family and career almost effortlessly without making any fuse about it like you lots are doing?, a hallmark you can find only in unselfish and submissive women.

You really don't get it. But then again, you won't be able to unless you experience it.

What sort of "career" will a woman have if she's got a full brood? Aren't you aware that the more kids she has, the more difficult it becomes to hold down any meaningful career? If the man, decides he wants 8 children, how is she going to combine looking after 8 kids with her job? How much time is she going to take off work (maternity leave) without it affecting her prospects? Have you any idea how much time a professional will have to take off i.e: career break to raise one child till they reach pre-school age? Much less if she's got so many kids?

Let's put this in context. Ideally, for the absolute best chance of a child developing well mentally and physically, they should be with mum receiving 100% care from her till at least the age of 3. But how realistic is it - another topic on it's own. Now assuming the man makes enough to cover her 3 years out of work, if she then decides to go on and have 4 or 5 more kids with a two or three year gap inbetween, she'll be looking at 12 - 15 years off work, just to raise their brood.

Now you tell me, what employer would take on a woman who's been out of work for that length of time? How would she keep abreast of the technological trends in the work place? Would she even remember where the on/off button is on a computer? And this to you, is an ideal situation because she's being "selfless" as you put it - yes?

shizzleStar:
Now i will throw my question back at you again, where will you classify your 'its my body i do what i want' stance? medical? financial? where? be courteous enough to answer please

I can't make head or tails of your question. But what I've gleaned from your post is that you advocate for the "slave" mentality of women. Sorry, it doesn't work that way, no matter what you feel.

And I reiterate, if the man chooses to be obnoxious with his demands, then family planning it is - otherwise he can go birth 2,000 more kids outside. It's his body after all too.

Killed it! @EfemenaXY

To add to your post, have we not all seen women/men whom either through divorce, death, or circumstance are to left to juggle 2-6 kids (or more!) on their own? Why do some people refuse to use their good sense on here?

In fact, I would advise people use those very possible circumstances as the yardstick for determining how many kids they should have. Though that is perhaps "extreme", it's also a lot more responsible, logical, healthy, humane etc. As for me...

EfemenaXY:

Okay, let me get this straight.

In your opinion, you think having four kids is the standard number of children applicable to a couple irrespective of their financial circumstances or any other curtailing factor, (assuming they both agree on that number). But in instances where the man wants a higher number say 12 and the woman only wants 2, 3, or 4 the woman must go ahead and birth those 12 kids simply becauseit's the man's prerogative to make the final decision?

I used 4 assuming thats what they agreed on, note emphasis, i never said its the standard anywhere. If he wants 4 and she wants 3, and there's no medical or financial implication, what stops her adding 1 more? The disparity you gave is ridiculous (12 and 3/4) and practically almost impossible, if that ever happens anywhere then they are better off living separate lives. No sane man will want 12kids except he is polygamous

Now you tell me in which part of the word something as ludicrous is / should be upheld simply on the man's say so - if not for the Dark Ages? Or better still, tell me what happens if it's the woman who wants more kids and the man is happy with fewer? His decision still overrides hers?

You didnt tell me the part of the world where only wife does FP without the husbands knowledge/consent simply cos 'its her body'- bright ages right? If she wants 4 and he wants 3, (where finance isnt a problem)1more kid shouldn't hurt. (Its okay if you are surprised with this)

You really don't get it. But then again, you won't be able to unless you experience it.

What sort of "career" will a woman have if she's got a full brood? Aren't you aware that the more kids she has, the more difficult it becomes to hold down any meaningful career? If the man, decides he wants 8 children, how is she going to combine looking after 8 kids with her job? How much time is she going to take off work (maternity leave) without it affecting her prospects? Have you any idea how much time a professional will have to take off i.e: career break to raise one child till they reach pre-school age? Much less if she's got so many kids?

i dont have to experience it personally to know how it feels, but like earlier on you keep giving ridiculous examples. I dont know if wanting more kids have to be 8 or 12? the man may want 1 more child than she wants, but if eg she wants 3 and he wants 5 vice versa, a median, (compromise) would suffice-4kids. Communication and understanding will do this much.

Let's put this in context. Ideally, for the absolute best chance of a child developing well mentally and physically, they should be with mum receiving 100% care from her till at least the age of 3. But how realistic is it - another topic on it's own. Now assuming the man makes enough to cover her 3 years out of work, if she then decides to go on and have 4 or 5 more kids with a two or three year gap inbetween, she'll be looking at 12 - 15 years off work, just to raise their brood.

As long as the child is through with breastfeeding, it could also develop well mentally and physically under the father, have seen husbands who are even better in this than wives. Again, if the disparity in the number of kids they desire to have together is this wide, (4-5) then they are better off living separate lives

Now you tell me, what employer would take on a woman who's been out of work for that length of time? How would she keep abreast of the technological trends in the work place? Would she even remember where the on/off button is on a computer? And this to you, is an ideal situation because she's being "selfless" as you put it - yes?

Why would she lose torch with trends in her work place or any other technological advancements?, having an additional kid will not stop her from keeping abreast will it? unless of course she has never been in torch anyways

I can't make head or tails of your question. But what I've gleaned from your post is that you advocate for the "slave" mentality of women. Sorry, it doesn't work that way, no matter what you feel.

And I reiterate, if the man chooses to be obnoxious with his demands, then family planning it is - otherwise he can go birth 2,000 more kids outside. It's his body after all too.

what you gleaned from my post is up to you, my comment has nothing to do with whatever advocacy you alluded to, its a pity that your so eagerly feministic stance and poise sees my post as such.

There's nothing obnoxious about having 1more kid, but taking pills and having FP without husbands consent simply cos its your body is stewpid and unheard of....and yes its his body too, but can you resist calling him a dog if he goes birthing 200 outside? yes?

There is a reason why it is called family plannin,no hospital will conduct FP on a woman without the husband's consent. What the wife did is wrong. The best she could do is talk to the husby.

I don't know where u guys got this idea of hospital not doing family planning for d wife without d husband's consent.
Really?
In health centers alone,women were encouraged to come and do family planning themselves if d health workers have gone thru her health history without d husbands consent.
Hospitals and clinics do so too.
I know many women on family planning yet their husbands r not aware of it.

Its only a fool that will continue breeding like rabbit after she had seen that health and finance doesn't favour her and d kids.

Its no secret that these days,when there is trouble especially in our lagos state, the man will vamoose into thin air or send d woman packing with d kids while he go and marry new wife to continue breeding.

Look around u and u will see many angry mothers without husbands.
Woe betide her if she didn't do FP.
And d funniest thing is after training them, d man will come back to claim d kids.


I went to hospital some time ago and met a couple who just put to bed.
The dr upon cancelling allmost all d bill, yet d man couldn't pay 15thousand only.
He ended up paying nine.
On asking how many kids,nurses said 5.
I heard one of d nurses telling her to come and do d needful immediately.

Now tell me if d woman will look back b4 she goes to take care of herself.

Haba! U guys r so primitive!

Mintayo:
There is a reason why it is called family plannin,no hospital will conduct FP on a woman without the husband's consent. What the wife did is wrong. The best she could do is talk to the husby.

That is not true. This is the field i work, as much as we encourage consent, you as a health worker CANNOT deny any adult family planning services if she asks for it. You only are in a position to offer advice and let her make her choice. The constitution guarantees freedom to access health care services and any clinic that denies a woman this freedom can be sued or reported.

So a woman can access family planning services without consent however it is always better to have consent