Junipero:




No mind them jor. Who even started that trend?

One guy like that, I've forgotten his moniker

Be afraid woman! Be very afraid!!!

This one someone is saying the man is mean, na wa oh!!!!

Personally, I am the kind of person that would not sleep over any issue without sorting it out with the woman. I do not know how to hide issues at all. I say out my mind.If my mum cooks bad food, I tell her straight ' Mum, that food is bad" so that she can make a change.

For any relationship, communication is the best open option for two people to stay as husband and wife and the truth be said. Let the woman tell him straight that she did wrong and seek for forgiveness because maybe they were not doing anything wrong or maybe was hugging the man when the husband walked in and at that point, there is nothing for her to deny her action.

For me, let the lady open up to the man and hear his opinion and if he decides not to talk, she should just take a walk because the man's silence portends danger.

nigerians sha...if he had beaten the wife blue black u will say he is wicked...he decided to remain silent without doing anything and u say he is evil...

Abee79:

I completed the story in a 2nd post below the 1st one. I also gave my reasons for keeping quiet and the aftermath

OK..cool

folu4real:



Your words are too harsh. Temptation is everywhere, my prayer is that we shall never be a victim of such act.

I know it might b harsh buh a cheating wife deserves d firing squad instead of doz innocent soldiers.

On thinking it over,the man might not really have any sinister motives he might just be calm about it and decide to forgive but one thing is sure she has lost the trust he had in her......

Woman go start fasting/prayer cuz d heart of man is deeply wicked

as a house wife, will you allow a girl like this to be your house maid?

Baddestguyp:
nigerians sha...if he had beaten the wife blue black u will say he is wicked...he decided to remain silent without doing anything and u say he is evil...

His approach was not the best. The fact that he refused to discuss has already put the woman in danger. Not even sending her packing even if people will come in to settle the matter.

Nitefury:


hehehehehe.. satanic gentleness indeed bro. Reminds me of a case sometime in 2010 in Lagos, only this time the husband was the victim/culprit. The wife caught him in bed with a lady and walked out not saying a word.

he tried to bring it up, but she'll have none of that. Then one night while he was sleeping, she quietly entered the kitchen, put vegetable oil in a frying pan, after bleaching the oil, went into the room and emptied the contents on his Instruments... Twas such a gory sight bro when neighbours broke in hearing the dude's screams.

Relationship (RLS) 101, stay away from them exes.. It only breeds trouble

erm, its a 'she'

Is the husband physically intimate with her? Sorry just have to ask @ Royver

Let her report herself to relevant authorities e.g her family,police,church, mosque before anything happens to her. Heard about a woman in same position few years back.The husband did not do anything to her after catching her Live and direct in the act,but kept quiet.They lived their lives as usual without no incidence or quarrel. The children were unaware of any issue between their parents. After few months of the man keeping quite, the woman could not bear it again and had to report herself to the family and church.

So let this woman do same before her head goes missing.

Wilson125:
as a house wife, will you allow a girl like this to be your house maid?

Just when you thought you have seen the highest display of stupidity......someone surprises you on Nairaland

okunboy:
This is the most dangerous husband! Dangerous than the one that will rake and be spontaneous!!. It takes a lot of energy on the part of the Husband to hold himself in...it is called 'engratia' Fear such people!

His silence portends bad omen. He might have been told about her wife's affairs and was tipped off when they were romancing. Most people don't take infidelity lightly talk less of a married woman in this part of the world. You know this is one of the basis for divorce. If she is the pious type every body knows,you can imagine how she will face her family and admit to having an extra marital affair,in fact she is in big mess. If she had caught her husband in the act before,I would say can argue it out but I doubt if she had caught because the way he handles the show he is a wise man. My advice,find his BEST friend and narrates the issue to for his intervention at least you will get the glimpse of his mind . This is is not a funny one.

Royver:

According to her, her husband is the "walk away and cool off type". Has hit her only once since the marriage, apparently not the violent type. my colleagues said to give her drugs and send her home and she should be extra nice to him and all will be well. But with all this stuff i see on nairaland about man stabbing woman am not so comfortable with that.

Some issues are not "walk away and cool off o"...
The woman sef get mind to stay and sleep in that house. She should just report herself to her family or to a friend that can get through to him...or come with him to your clinic.
That level of calmness can be pathologic!

Junipero:
TRICK QUESTION

If the Lady commits suicide, who will take the blame.

I'm betting my money it will NEVER be the guy.

The Silence Treatment is one of the hardest stuff to carry out.


Lemme tell you my story.

My swedish Girlfriend, our friends and I were arguing over the tax structure here in Germany. So when she couldn't have more of my valid Points, she blurted "Schwarzer wie du haben kein Sage im Deutschlandpolitik"


Trust me you don't wanna know what that means but that was mean racist. I just ignored her for the rest of the discussion.

She didn't bother to come to my apartment that night. Next day , I started getting Smileys on my whatsapp (Oyibo girl problems).

Later that day, she came over with one small cake she baked. I just hugged her and faced the cake squarely ( don't judge me jor)

But after the cake, I just went back to my Laptop.. live streaming Manutd vs Bayern Muenchen...no time o..

She wan come siddon on top my lap follow watch ( with my darling MUFC already losing after a beautiful Evra goal)... I just pulled out another seat for her. No be person tell her to just go siddon quietly.

She come ask me "Sag mir ehrlich, was sind wir momentan" (be honest. what are we now?)... No answer .

She carry vex waka comot, and I kindly told her to please wash the plates she used.. HAHAHAHA.

2 days no text nothing.... Me sha dey miss my oyibo oh but my plan must come to fruition...

Well lemme cut the long story short. I was treated to a mealy meal of Roasted Pork Ribs with Fries and Curry ketchup.. It was accompanied with ehhhh ehhhmmmmm and a very verrryyy emotional apology (trust Oyibo and their feelings)..

We're history now though.

Silence treatment brings you good food and a weird sense of satisfaction.. It's worth the try.

If u wan mah connect you to the babe tho.... ...... raise ya hands.

Wow...her statement is very, very racist

Silence is d best warfare in dis situation. I so much luv d man...killing her softly with silence ..since 1878

The p is the man is in shock, people av diff ways to handle shock, and if the woman brings it up, he myt withdraw the more. All she can do is go stay with her parents for a while till her husband get's over the shock. Because he myt av some not so good plans for her in mind if he should see her around.

I can bet anything that that woman is from one particular tribe. They so commonly indulge in adultery! I didn't mention any particular tribe. but they know themselves! However, am currently living in d Southwest!

Royver:

she said she tried to bring it up that night but he refused. Told her they would discuss it later. Unfortunately she hasnt attempted to broach the subject again since then.
This may sound crazy, but is it possible the man has forgotten? She says he goes around happily, not carrying face or sulking.

forgotten what? Nobody forgets that kind of thing much less in a week.

He might be in denial trying to suppress reality by convincing himself that ignoring it will make it go away or he may be bidding his time to do something worse.

Either way he has to talk about it.
If she can't bear the silence anymore, she can send him a long asssss text or email baring her mind about everything that happened with the hope that it could break the ice and get him to react or at least talk about it

That silence ain't healthy.
Odi dangerous

prettyboi1989:
The p is the man is in shock, people av diff ways to handle shock, and if the woman brings it up, he myt withdraw the more. All she can do is go stay with her parents for a while till her husband get's over the shock. Because he myt av some not so good plans for her in mind if he should see her around.

Ur suggestion could be disastrous for her. What if by the time she is comin back anoda woman is already in d house! What I think is dat any woman who cheats on her husband shud be ready to live permanently wit the man she cheated wit if she is caught!

In this situation, I must sit down and get my kettle on fire in order to get tea and watch further discussion on this issue.

Most ladies cherish this kind of tea keg.

feedthenation:


Wow...her statement is very, very racist

But I liked her ooo...

Amen o and me too. I really need this kind of silence that her hubby has. But I fear I will become deadly in my plans against this kind of woman.

LyfeJennings:
God please give me the patience and silence of that man o

It's so bad that the lady had to cheat on her husband in the first place; like, what was she thinking about?

Anyway, the husband's inaction is something that should be watch, but then, he may not have any hutful ulterior motive against his wife. The silence may well serve as his own punishment.

I've got no suggestion to give the cheating better-half now as the thread is filled with enough suggestions and chastisement to befuddle her thick fluid of pap she calls a brain. However, she may just write out on a piece of paper the numerous suggestions and people's comments about her husband, give them to the husband to read and hope for the best.

But of course, she deserves the worst. Smh!

cococandy:
forgotten what? Nobody forgets that kind of thing much less in a week.

He might be in denial trying to suppress reality by convincing himself that ignoring it will make it go away or he may be bidding his time to do something worse.

Either way he has to talk about it.
If she can't bear the silence anymore, she can send him a long asssss text or email baring her mind about everything that happened with the hope that it could break the ice and get him to react or at least talk about it

That silence ain't healthy.
Odi dangerous

very dangerous

ALISMILE:
Ur suggestion could be disastrous for her. What if by the time she is comin back anoda woman is already in d house! What I think is dat any woman who cheats on her husband shud be ready to live permanently wit the man she cheated wit if she is caught!

Lol payback is a biitch, she can't eat her cake and have it. Any one who cheats should be ready to face the consequence and not looking for an easy way out.

andyanders:
In this situation, I must sit down and get my kettle on fire in order to get tea and watch further discussion on this issue.

Most ladies cherish this kind of tea keg.

If your wife cheats on you with the tea kettle, please don't come crying to Nairalanders.

sukkot:
so you never cheat before abi ? this one wey you dey show ya yansh to the world for pishure. na ya kind deadly pass. chop 10 men in one weekend clean mouth come dey post comment like say im be mother teresa

Lol. Look at this one. You asked question and answer am yourself. Wetin remain for me to talk.

W what ell, can I say? Same thing I would do... who got time to start arguing about what happened? if her conscience can't contain her anymore Maybe she'll just start crying and begging while all I do is stare at her and ask what's wrong? if she tries to bringing what happened, I'll just tell her to forget about it. That's ma own reaction tho. everyone reacts differently to different situations.

True

linearity:
I blame the lady, she was caught red handed and she want to discuss it? What is there to be discussed?...I am curious to know her opening sentence to her husband when she attempt to discuss it...is it something.."honey can we please talk about what happen at the shop?".

The man will see it as her attempt to minimize, justify, blame the Devil, etc...She should have kneel down and start begging her husband, with tears, sorry, remorse, etc...what women do not understand with men is that, despite our Manchu or ego, we cannot stand the tears of our love ones, even if they have committed the worst thing on earth...that tears cut straight through to your heart, you see your wife in her weak and vulnerable and as the man, you naturally response to protect her.

Trying to discuss it sends the wrong signal, the man will see it as a way to rationalize what has happened and maybe he is still waiting to see that remorse, but a week is too late to show that. The guy must have concluded that, the wife is truly every worst thing he is thinking and just going through the emotions silently.

The man might mean no harm because from my experience, I once caught my girlfriend that stays in same house with me cheating on me, I did similar thing to her. I just handled it with maturity and for some weeks she couldn't withstand my silent anymore even when she tried bringing it up, I refused to utter word. I just choosed to punish her emotionally by keeping her in dark. But one night she broke the silence she started crying, begging that I should forgive her and I asked for what offence? Though after much talk that I did forgive her but to be honest with you, that was the day she lost her place in my heart, I now regarded her as my fucking mate, no more love and trust attached to the relationship. When I left school, she was never in my list of girls to choose as wife,we ended it there in school.