Chrisbenogor:

@david & Sista
My biggest hope is that he does not make it worse for her.
I know many families like this here in Naija, very very close family for that matter thats why I say its not yet the worst thing that can happen.
Now is the time for the woman to hold on to this man sensibly so that she does not loose that which this other woman is trying to take forcefully, the other woman is the biggest villan.

This att. is exactly the opp. of the att. that he should have right now. She does not need to hold, HE needs to hold on to her. HE bleeped up not her. SHE has been loyal and faithful. HE NEEDS TO BEG AND BEG AND BEG.

The responsibility is on his shoulders to save this relationship not her.

sistawoman:


This attitude is exactly the opp. of the attitude that he should have right now. She does not need to hold, HE needs to hold on to her. HE bleeped up not her. SHE has been loyal and faithful. HE NEEDS TO BEG AND BEG AND BEG.

The responsibility is on his shoulders to save this relationship not her.

See why I say sexist dorks like Chris shouldnt be responding?

who should be "holding" who?

sistawoman:


This att. is exactly the opp. of the att. that he should have right now.  She does not need to hold, HE needs to hold on to her.  HE bleeped up not her. SHE has been loyal and faithful. HE NEEDS TO BEG AND BEG AND BEG.

The responsibility is on his shoulders to save this relationship not her.

and where is ur proof?

in as much as i feel for dis girl,y'all r making her look like one GOD,d earlier she knows dat d devil is always out to destroy pples happiness d better for her

and if she is not interested,then let them go their separate ways,my own is he must tell her the truth before tying her down in marriage

jenni, my problem is mainly with how people are saying the dude should go by talking to the fiancee

Them ASSUMING that she's immediately forgive him cos she's a "female" or she should do so, so the "other woman doesnt win" is so dumb.

His pompous attitude towards the thing sef is just disgusting. "oh I know she can never leave me". When a dude believes this, he will do anything cos after all in his mind you'll always stick around.

some should just wake up and realize that not all girls will accept this kinda nonsense.


David, would you have kept that secret if you had mutual friends and they were dating and the girl cheated?

just a Q

busybein:

and where is ur proof?

he said it. seriously jenni, 8 years relationship and they are just getting married. she could have easily left since.[size=4pt]i would have. 8 yrs wetin[/size]

yes he must tell her the truth.

But lets be real if my man came to me and said "baby i bleeped up and slept with someone and she is prego but she is trying to steal me from you and you should not let her steal me away"

I would first laugh, cry and then cuss him out because the truth is he is helping the other woman to "steal" him away.

Dont deal with the "other woman", jazz or anything else.  

Just humble yourself and say I f'ed up and I am deeply sorry.  I know that i have betrayed our trust and our love.  I know that you may walk away from me but I am praying that you will allow me to show you how sorry I am.  Ask me whatever you want and I will tell the truth.  Beg and plead cry and beg somemore.  And give her time to heal.  Dont dictate how much time she will need to heal but let her heal in her own way.

and he better have a better story than I cant remember what happened.

i get ur point karma,but like i said "shes not God" infact its good it happend now so if shes not interested she can back off before tying d knots with him,8 years i know is a long time,but alot of people have dated years longer than that,infact i will never even date a guy for 5yrs not to talk of 8 years

all I'm saying is,let them go for a DNA but after hes told d girl about it,the guy has alot of work to do,by beggin her to still marry him,but this girl too has a lot of work to do by standing by this dude,wtout co.operation how willthey survive,wtout co-operation how wil d marriage work out

Both of them need to put their hands togeda and fight this temptation that is before them,if a married woman can forgive her husbands infidelity then why wouldnt she?we r all human

KarmaMod:

he said it. seriously jenni, 8 years relationship and they are just getting married. she could have easily left since.[size=4pt]i would have. 8 years wetin[/size]

karma he said,did he see her?was he wt her all d time?i could tell my hubby that ive never cheated on him since we got married,but still have a guy outside,na today,nobody knows d heart,I'm not saying shes cheated on him,neither I'm i saying shes not,nobody has that ansa

@sista
Don't get me wrong, I am looking at the big picture here as regards what david mentioned about asking for baby daddy money. Not about who offended who, we have said he was wrong and should beg beg, what happens if the woman agrees? She would have to know how to hold her man that's what I am saying.

Seriously karm my patience is wearing thin.

jenni, I already know the chic in question is lying about the pregnancy. what they need to do is check up on "conception" date with a dr all. everything else is unnecessary noise.

just saying in general, people should be all like "oh I know she will never leave me even if i shoot her father" yada yada

infact i will never even date a guy for 5yrs not to talk of 8 years

me sef I dont get this new "trend"

Chrisbenogor:

Seriously karm my patience is wearing thin.

come and beat me na. Im not a RN so please stop bothering me.

Asinwere

KarmaMod:

jenni, I already know the chic in question is lying about the pregnancy. what they need to do is check up on "conception" date with a dr all. everything else is unnecessary noise.

just saying in general, people should be all like "oh I know she will never leave me even if i shoot her father" yada yada

ofcourse shes lying,some women r devils

KarmaMod:

me sef I don't get this new "trend"

i tire ooo,i wonder wat they r doing in a relationship for dat long,no wonder dat "rockchic" is desperate now,cos d one she dated for long,left her

girls had better wake up for real

KarmaMod:

come and beat me na. I'm not a RN so please stop bothering me.

Asinwere

oti to

iwo na like trouble gan

busybein:

iwo na like trouble gan

Beat you ke? You are just ranting here, have you handled a situation like this in reality before?
I didn't hear you scream about how wicked the supposedly pregnant woman is. Talk about taking a log out of your eyes.
See just leave me and my posts alone, I asked you for a civil discussion devoid of name calling but it seems like that would be a mountain for you to climb.
From what you have shown on this thread (and obviously I do not have any deeper insight in your mind),I cannot really appreciate your intelligence because it is just driven by hate. In fact rude and dumb is probably too kind a wording for your level of neural activity, unless of course all of that activity takes place in your childish brain. This evidence is fully consistent with the behaviour you have shown here on this thread, but I will withold my conclusions until further evidence pops up. Too small a sample to draw conclusions.

I didn't hear you scream about how wicked the supposedly pregnant woman is. Talk about taking a log out of your eyes.

That's because you can't afford a decent pair of glasses. maybe jenni can translate my words to Igbo for you and you'll see where I did.

For a supposed dude, you talk too much without saying anything sensible.

ive reported u pple to seun,karma and chris u lot should go and think of another username,cos ban is coming ur way

but seriously drop all dis,chris be d dude and let it go,d earlier u know women like trouble and never give up d better

now back to topic

And for a lady your tongue needs to be scrubbed.( or should I say you fingers )

@busybein
Don't mind me jare. Yes back to the issue at hand.

@topic
Here we go again. Another "third hand" thinker. When you guys begin thinking with the brian God gave to you, trust me the world will have far less dramatic cases of such to deal with.

Just how you hold your head, it's exaclty how the barber is going to trim it. Go clean up your mess. I am sure you werent in a coma when you knowingly shagged her brains out ( without a condom too, in this day and age).

David, would you have kept that secret if you had mutual friends and they were dating and the girl cheated?

just a Q

Yes. As long as i was absolutely certain it was a mistake and she was remorseful about it.
When people tell me something in the hope that they can trust me with it (i mean close friends in real life not cyber friends) then they can be certain it will remain between us forever . . . doesnt matter if its male or female.

busybein:

ive reported u people to seun,karma and chris u lot should go and think of another username,because ban is coming ur way

what name do you suggest?

KarmaMod:

what name do you suggest?

try staphyllococus or asthma

@poster,
you are not in any trouble. Be a man. Talk to your fiance and let her know that you are a victim of seduction.

Once you can get your fiance to understand what happened and forgive you, go right ahead and dare the idiot claiming to carry your baby to do her worse. If she wish, let her deliver the baby and drop it on your lap. Take the baby and dump the mother! She wanted to force herself on you by all mean and she is using the preg as the object of blackmail. I can't stand such a lady without making them regret their actions.

If your fiance refused to forgive you let her be. But don't marry the impostor. Whatever her game plan. Marrying her may bring you a lot of regret. Better a child out of wedlock that marriage that is like a war zone.

A word is for the wise.

Time when women use pregnancy to trap men is gone. Any lady that shamefully do that must be exposed. For all I care, you might not be responsible for the pregnancy.

As for you, learn to tie your kilimanjaro when next you are in a temptress haven! You are careless with your health and took a big gamble. You could have got a virus in the process. Thank God, it is a baby not AIDS.

Good luck!

olanajim:


As for you, learn to tie your kilimanjaro when next you are in a temptress haven! You are careless with your health and took a big gamble. You could have got a virus in the process. Thank God, it is a baby not AIDS.

Good luck!

I pray for your wife as she will have a husband that will cheat on her with no regret.

actually olajinim is a pretty decent dude, sista

@ OP.

To be honest, I really dont pity you and obviously, u aint seeking that though.
For a lady to have implored you to sleep with her. . .u should have deduced that she's up to a something. . . .
this u never did. . . .
Secondly, when you know you will soon be married, why didnt you use a protection for Christ sake. . . .
that you did not too. . . . and to think that you will be getting married soon. . . .makes me conclude you are yet to be disciplined and decisive enough for marriage.

All said and done, . . . .since it's way out you seek. . .I will only tell you what I'd do if I were in you shoes (I pray not though)

I will simply confirm if the girl is really pregnant or not. . .this I'd do by demanding a test, . . .
Secondly, you will have to come clean to your fiance. . .that is if the pregnancy is real. . . .
tell her everything and make sure you tell her you were Stupid to get yourself in this mess. . . .
make her realize you really wanna be with her and NO ONE else. . .tell her you wouldnt swap her for anything. . .

If she can deal with it. . .she will go through with marrying you.

Lastly, tell the pregnant girl that u gonnna have ur kid when he's back. . .and lay a serious emphasis on the fact that you would want absolute nothing to do with her anymore. . .

Simple. . .Good luck.

T_bag:

I will simply confirm if the girl is really pregnant or notthis I'd do by demanding a test, . . .
Secondly, you will have to come clean to your fiancethat is if the pregnancy is real. . . .
tell her everything and make sure you tell her you were Stupid to get yourself in this mess. . . .
make her realize you really want to be with her and NO ONE elsetell her you wouldnt swap her for anything. . .

If she can deal with itshe will go through with marrying you.

Lastly, tell the pregnant girl that u gonnna have ur kid when he's backand lay a serious emphasis on the fact that you would want absolute nothing to do with her anymore. . .

SimpleGood luck.

^{How you dey?}

You left something out, even if she was pregnant, are you not going to go for DNA test to confirm if the baby was yours or not?

Anywaz, don't feel sorry for the poster either. That' what happens when men are not satisfied with what they have at home. I seriously hope the wedding does NOT go on. I do not wish this on myself, neither can I wish it on my enemy.
Who has the energy to deal with a "baby mama" and her financial demands? Abegggggg

somehow i get the impression this girl is either

*not carrying his child

*not pregnant at all


please do a DNA if she is preggaz



its not the end of the world.  grow up and take responsibility for your mistakes and thereafter make choices geared to your future success.
as a repurcussion you may either loose the relationship with the girl OR your relationship will be crap for a very long time or forever.
thats just a consequence.  YES OUR BAD ACTIONS DOO CARRY CONSEQUENCES WHETHER WE LIKE IT OR NOT. 

sorry, been there done that myself to learn this.

Hard truth is: Justice, punishment, discipline are a part of love too you know.

Ebony-Silk:

^{How you dey?}

You left something out, even if she was pregnant, are you not going to go for DNA test to confirm if the baby was yours or not?

Anywaz, don't feel sorry for the poster either. That' what happens when men are not satisfied with what they have at home. I seriously hope the wedding does NOT go on. I do not wish this on myself, neither can I wish it on my enemy.
Who has the energy to deal with a "baby mama" and her financial demands? Abegggggg

How are you too. . .and I miss talking to u small. . .



That is generalization. . . .and moreover, from the explaination the guy left. . .I think he cared so much about the fiance. He just lost his loyalty sense for a couple of minutes and unfortunatly, those were the minutes he slept with the girl.

I believe it can still work out sha. . . .and isnt love suppose to be a sacrife?

Love is a sacrifice Silly boy

but the hard truth is severely corroding the all important foundation of Trust and Respect is really
no way to enter a marriage.

You may be sorry but man, if i was D girl, i may have a lot to loose but i will seriously always watch my back.

After all they say, a man who learns to beat or cheat is like a dog that learns how to bite, it just never stops
(save for 1/2 percent of all cases)

Sorry, but you hurt her man. In advance that is, cause assuming you havent tell her yet.

talk to women, they will try and best predict her thought patterns and what the best cause of actions may be.

T_bag:

How are you tooand I miss talking to u small. . .



That is generalization. . . .and moreover, from the explaination the guy leftI think he cared so much about the fiance. He just lost his loyalty sense for a couple of minutes and unfortunatly, those were the minutes he slept with the girl.

I believe it can still work out sha. . . .and isnt love suppose to be a sacrife?

^{Small? Same here, hope everything is alright at the other end. Got worried, thought those females over there did justice to you}

Loyalty sense my bum!! Please don't make an excuse for the dude. How would you feel if you and your fiance already set up a date for your wedding. Then you heard that you won't be the father of your wife's child. Oops, she couldn't keep her legs closed because she loved you oh so very much!!

I may be too young to understand all this romantic jagbajantis and love drama, but I am not naive. If I see that there's no need to waste my time, I leave. Loyalty sense my flat bum

I think it's best he leaves his fiance and try to deal with the pregant one. You know what they say, a broken r/ship is better than a broken marraige.