Welcome, Guest: Register On Nairaland / LOGIN! / Trending / Recent / New
Stats: 3,150,848 members, 7,810,265 topics. Date: Saturday, 27 April 2024 at 03:43 AM

Her Lover Of Over Four Years Just Broke Up With Her; Please Advise Her - Romance (6) - Nairaland

Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Romance / Her Lover Of Over Four Years Just Broke Up With Her; Please Advise Her (26933 Views)

'my Boyfriend Of 4 Years Just Got Engaged' - Heartbroken Lady Shares Story / My Girlfriend Just Broke Our 5 Year Relationship. Pls I Need Advise!!! / Telling Them About Her Past Relationship Keep Driving Them Away- Advise Her. (2) (3) (4)

(1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (Reply) (Go Down)

Re: Her Lover Of Over Four Years Just Broke Up With Her; Please Advise Her by Nobody: 9:05pm On Apr 26, 2015
Women are worse when it comes to breaking heart, they just do it with ease nd when dey come up with a fault for u chisos! U'll wonder where u went wrong lolz unless u smart enough to out smart her. The lady should move on nd be happy maynot be easy but time will workout everything.

1 Like

Re: Her Lover Of Over Four Years Just Broke Up With Her; Please Advise Her by tobidipity(m): 9:15pm On Apr 26, 2015
Look around for a nice bar, order for a cold bottle of big stout. Take ur time un drowning it. Order for another bottle. U can order for the third if u dey capable. Go home and make sure u re careful so that what will happen to ur ex might not happen to u. Watch any movie(i'm sure its dd movie that will end up watching u). Start a new life when u wake.
Re: Her Lover Of Over Four Years Just Broke Up With Her; Please Advise Her by SAZZYSKOLY(m): 9:36pm On Apr 26, 2015
Haba u wicked oooh undecided 2 hours...sun...no atm... I go jus mad like all dis weed guys on nairaland... dat scattering house tin... nah so my eye go jus RED... squeeze face.... dey para... grin
Beamborla:

Lol... Okay!
Jes pray you don't stand on the queue in the sun for 2hrs plus then realize you left your ATM card at home.

As for me, I cry when looking for smth. That type where you get to scatter the whole house and check everywhere.
Re: Her Lover Of Over Four Years Just Broke Up With Her; Please Advise Her by Chivee(f): 9:52pm On Apr 26, 2015
My dear take a Cue from GEJ
Ur talking about only 4years.
This guy was in "it" for 6good years before Nigeria Dumped him.
Yet he demonstrated resilience and political maturity in conceding.
Tho in his case he did not treat her(naija) right. grin just kidding.
But on a serious note, its hard to advise someone when u're not clear on the exact circumstance surrounding the relationship in question.
Who was at fault? Was it trust issues? Or a distraction, like the dude having interest in another woman? Did his feelings for her start to wane for some known or unknown reason? Could she have unknowingly been the cause? While its important that she reflects on all variables with a view to underztanding exactly what went wrong, I'm also aware that this experience invariably HURTS. I always advise ppl in these shoes to move on, give themselvez a break (from relationships)and focus on developing themselves. Yes its actually easier said but its doable. Only takes some courage and will. The reazon for this advice is that most of the time, ppl who somehow manage to makeup again after a break up hardly ever get things on track anymore. Cos by now d damage had already been done and things would never really be the same with the victim as there's already been a major breach of trust. Since the "heart breaker"(sorry to say) could disregard the time(years)& commitment, precious moments shared,effort, and resources invested into the relationship and still go ahead in such a "cold"& brutal manner to subject him/her to such emotional affliction, then there's every chance that he/she could do it again. And from my personal experience and the drama i've had to witness of many such partners in this struggle, this(breakup-makeup-break-up)keeps going on in circles to the frustration of the couple & mostly ends badly anyway. So why not look ahead, bite the bullet and take the bull by the horn once and for all and save yourself further pain in the future.
In a case where it had to do with one of the parties cheating, it plays out alil differently. Where the lady cheated; it is almost always unforgiveable for men. There's a far better chance with the women coz dey are stronger emotionally in this regard and can more easily forgive such. On the other hand,men's wiring & thinking process makes it a lot harder for them to swallow,no matter how hard they may try to.
But as I said, I believe every case is unique in one way or the other. Therefore it still really depends on the circumstances surrounding their story.
If she thinks there may be a good chance that she could win him back, then she should go for it. At least to gratify her HOPE.
Re: Her Lover Of Over Four Years Just Broke Up With Her; Please Advise Her by Beamborla(f): 9:55pm On Apr 26, 2015
SAZZYSKOLY:
Haba u wicked oooh undecided 2 hours...sun...no atm... I go jus mad like all dis weed guys on nairaland... dat scattering house tin... nah so my eye go jus RED... squeeze face.... dey para... grin
Sebi you no go cry grin
Lol
Re: Her Lover Of Over Four Years Just Broke Up With Her; Please Advise Her by richidinho(m): 10:00pm On Apr 26, 2015
This is exactly what I said in the other thread

NL guys will send pm they refuse to answer claiming they are hooked up, but when the heartbreak comes....... U see them running to the forum for help
Re: Her Lover Of Over Four Years Just Broke Up With Her; Please Advise Her by Nobody: 10:02pm On Apr 26, 2015
So they were phucking for 4ck and half years ?

What tha 4uck ?

Was the relationship not defined ?
Re: Her Lover Of Over Four Years Just Broke Up With Her; Please Advise Her by Nobody: 10:05pm On Apr 26, 2015
SAZZYSKOLY:
OMO babe u fa..... sorry u fine..... even in black and white u Glow ;....... hmmmmmm.... I lack d words..... cool
u r making my head to swell,nd it seems it wants to explode

1 Like

Re: Her Lover Of Over Four Years Just Broke Up With Her; Please Advise Her by Nobody: 10:33pm On Apr 26, 2015
Lala247:


Nah jealousy dey worry am

No worry i go greet am too .. Make E no vex lol smiley
lol abi

1 Like

Re: Her Lover Of Over Four Years Just Broke Up With Her; Please Advise Her by ifeanyi83(m): 10:38pm On Apr 26, 2015
I think it would have been useful if you stated his reasons for walking away that way you can get useful advice. But in the meantime girl, you have a right to brpe happy a choice that can be made by you and you alone...your life ain't over, dust yourself up and move on...
Re: Her Lover Of Over Four Years Just Broke Up With Her; Please Advise Her by anigbajumo(m): 10:42pm On Apr 26, 2015
Coz am physicist I wil advice u frm newton 3rd Law of motion "for every action,dea s an equal or opposite reaction" ..... D guy wnt change without any reason buh am seein both of u bk.
Re: Her Lover Of Over Four Years Just Broke Up With Her; Please Advise Her by lalasticlala(m): 10:43pm On Apr 26, 2015
UPDATE


I sent a mail earlier about my lover of 4yrs leaving me and going thru d thread now, I see people askin for wat happnd.


We graduated from d same Uni and we started datin since our 200l..I'm a Christian though and he's a muslim although I wasn't bothered about the religion thing...Blive me nairalanders, I never cheated for once on him though I nag and my only offence is always wanting to see him...There were many breakups along d way wc were alwys instigated by him, he's not d type to shower one with gifts but I stood by him, he was caring in his own way..And few days ago, he sed its heading no where, he dosnt see us goin d long haul togeda and Religion is a major difference...And he sed, he hasn't planned his future and cnt include me in an unplanned future so its over...That's it.

1 Like

Re: Her Lover Of Over Four Years Just Broke Up With Her; Please Advise Her by Teeporshe(f): 11:00pm On Apr 26, 2015
It would get better.. The pain eventually fades.. Its going to be very hard but one day you would even begin to wonder how you got ast the pain and him altogether.
Re: Her Lover Of Over Four Years Just Broke Up With Her; Please Advise Her by franugo(m): 4:47am On Apr 27, 2015
RomanZeus:
I doubt
No sane man would dump a light skin woman

mad mangringrin
#in flavour's voice 'black is biuriful' cheesy
Re: Her Lover Of Over Four Years Just Broke Up With Her; Please Advise Her by MosquitoREBIRTH(m): 6:24am On Apr 27, 2015
godoluwa:
God bless you bro. I personally broke up with my girl of 4years & 2months yesterday. Those time we were together was hell for me. Number of years is not what matter but ability of both partner to comprehend each other. btw, she no dey nairaland which means d story waz nt mine. LIFE GOES ON...
lol...Bro, I wrote that out of experience too... it's actually beta to break such relationships instead of patching in it. LIFE GOES ON jare... cheers man..
Re: Her Lover Of Over Four Years Just Broke Up With Her; Please Advise Her by eckersley: 6:39am On Apr 27, 2015
From her statement that she never once cheated on him, one can deduce she was into premarital sex with him ( I stand to be corrected).
If so what kind of a Christian is she?

Second.
Has anyone looked at the whole breakup from a religious point of view?
A (true) Muslim will NEVER EVER marry a Christian (from my LIL knowledge of Muslims). Someone, kindly correct me
Re: Her Lover Of Over Four Years Just Broke Up With Her; Please Advise Her by Nobody: 7:16am On Apr 27, 2015
Lala247:


So saying morning to someone shows wt undecided
Next time dont assume things .. Mind ur biz . When i chat to anyonelse u dont cht cuz its lala . Uve grown wings .. Mind ur biz angry
Nigerian ppl n tbeir sick mentality just cuz ur nice to someone doesnt mean anything ..
Swerve abeg
.
.
Jesus christ..... That dude was only cracking u up! It was jez a joke!..... Girls and their hot temper! Are u on ya menses period?
Re: Her Lover Of Over Four Years Just Broke Up With Her; Please Advise Her by SAZZYSKOLY(m): 7:53am On Apr 27, 2015
Calm ur nerves wink..... ur head is of no use to me if it explodes grin.........like it exactly d way iiit is..... U SET O jare wink
jomile:
u r making my head to swell,nd it seems it wants to explode
Re: Her Lover Of Over Four Years Just Broke Up With Her; Please Advise Her by SAZZYSKOLY(m): 7:55am On Apr 27, 2015
Loll.... that 1 fit make person weep.... grin
Beamborla:

Sebi you no go cry grin
Lol
Re: Her Lover Of Over Four Years Just Broke Up With Her; Please Advise Her by redhook(m): 8:00am On Apr 27, 2015
lalasticlala:
I got this mail from a Nairaland visitor who seriously needs advice.

Please help her by offering her good and useful pieces of advice that would help raise her spirits high..





angry
lalasticlala:
I got this mail from a Nairaland visitor who seriously needs advice.

Please help her by offering her good and useful pieces of advice that would help raise her spirits high..





So she does not know that we find NAGGING worse than CHEATING abi? SHE must be a confirmed Learner!
Re: Her Lover Of Over Four Years Just Broke Up With Her; Please Advise Her by Beamborla(f): 8:47am On Apr 27, 2015
SAZZYSKOLY:
Loll.... that 1 fit make person weep.... grin
Your throat go just dey do you like say e wan burst cheesy

Have a nice day jor

1 Like

Re: Her Lover Of Over Four Years Just Broke Up With Her; Please Advise Her by Nobody: 8:53am On Apr 27, 2015
foxxynik:

.
.
Jesus christ..... That dude was only cracking u up! It was jez a joke!..... Girls and their hot temper! Are u on ya menses period?

Mind ur biz... undecided
Re: Her Lover Of Over Four Years Just Broke Up With Her; Please Advise Her by Chivee(f): 8:57am On Apr 27, 2015
lalasticlala:
UPDATE

OK my dear. Don't know if you read my earlier post. I sent that before seeing this one. I urge u to read it again. And though I was neither here nor there in my advise, I think I have a clearer picture now.. So With this newly shed light, I can confidently advise that u move on.
Though very rarely, I've seen couples who have crossed the religion-barrier and taken things to the next level. So if he doesn't consider this relationship important enough for both of u to jointly overcome any challenges and hurdles that come with inter-religious union, then u need to take him seriously. I see God's hand here. I believe a better and more suitable person is somewhere out there waiting. Atleazt be grateful too that he mustered the courage to be so plane & honest with you. Though its such a shame that he is just realising this fact after apparently wasting 4precious years of your life. Move on my dear. Life is filled with ample opportunities. I'm pretty sure you're an awesome person. Else how did he take interest in you in the 1st place. Your worse enemy right now is "Mr. Emotional attachment". He's like a cancer.He is very stubborn and likes to linger on by messing with your mind and making u feel mentally and psychologically dependent on a mere "flesh&bone". My dear.. The cure for this a multi-phased plan.
It starts with the period of grieving. This for me is the hardest part yet most important cos its necessary for healing. This does not mean you should stay in depression 24/7. Find an activity that'll distract u alil. Trust me It gets a lot easier as time goes on. A time will come when you'll look back, wonder what you were thinking and can't help but laugh over everything.
Lastly and most importantly you need to keep reminding yourself of the fact that u have always been a self confident, elegant and beautiful person. No one can change that. Love yourself first
Re: Her Lover Of Over Four Years Just Broke Up With Her; Please Advise Her by Nobody: 9:05am On Apr 27, 2015
Lala247:


Mind ur biz... undecided
.
.
Wha'ever!
Re: Her Lover Of Over Four Years Just Broke Up With Her; Please Advise Her by Nobody: 9:07am On Apr 27, 2015
foxxynik:

.
.
Wha'ever!

U look mature. Y u chting like 16 year old smiley. D person ur defending we r friends . Lol mr save a nicca go n find work stay out of womens issue it aint cute wink
Enjoy ur day
Re: Her Lover Of Over Four Years Just Broke Up With Her; Please Advise Her by mikolo80: 9:11am On Apr 27, 2015
when she was nagging she no know ba
e de sweet am for belle
Re: Her Lover Of Over Four Years Just Broke Up With Her; Please Advise Her by Nobody: 9:21am On Apr 27, 2015
SAZZYSKOLY:
Calm ur nerves wink..... ur head is of no use to me if it explodes grin.........like it exactly d way iiit is..... U SET O jare wink
u r very funny,I like a guy wit a good sense of humor,but don't let my compliment to swell ur head
Re: Her Lover Of Over Four Years Just Broke Up With Her; Please Advise Her by SAZZYSKOLY(m): 9:38am On Apr 27, 2015
Me head don dey swell from d time I checked out yah profile.... but thank goodness it's elastic.... so u can keep d compliment coming grin I don't mind smiley wink sent u a mail....
jomile:
u r very funny,I like a guy wit a good sense of humor,but don't let my compliment to swell ur head
Re: Her Lover Of Over Four Years Just Broke Up With Her; Please Advise Her by SAZZYSKOLY(m): 9:42am On Apr 27, 2015
Lala u jus dey tassi ( tackle) everybody front back left and centre like say u dey play Italian league grin.... u better right danger zone Keep off my AREA tongue
Lala247:


U look mature. Y u chting like 16 year old smiley. D person ur defending we r friends . Lol mr save a nicca go n find work stay out of womens issue it aint cute wink
Enjoy ur day
Re: Her Lover Of Over Four Years Just Broke Up With Her; Please Advise Her by Nobody: 10:14am On Apr 27, 2015
why will u date someone for 4 yrs is too long, na.
She has to move on with her life, learn her lessons well, and learn to conserve her resoures her oil wells have been seriously depleted sha. grin
God dey.
Re: Her Lover Of Over Four Years Just Broke Up With Her; Please Advise Her by Nobody: 10:21am On Apr 27, 2015
Lala247:


U look mature. Y u chting like 16 year old smiley. D person ur defending we r friends . Lol mr save a nicca go n find work stay out of womens issue it aint cute wink
Enjoy ur day
.
.
Wha'ever!.... You don't make any sense to me! So swerve!
Re: Her Lover Of Over Four Years Just Broke Up With Her; Please Advise Her by Nobody: 10:44am On Apr 27, 2015
foxxynik:

.
.
Wha'ever!.... You don't make any sense to me! So swerve!

Lol likewise hun

(1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (Reply)

7 Unavoidable Regrets People Have After A Breakup / Guys, If A Lady Says These During Sex Then You Are Good On Bed / What’s The Most Embarrassing Thing That Has Fallen Out Of Your Pocket/Bag?

(Go Up)

Sections: politics (1) business autos (1) jobs (1) career education (1) romance computers phones travel sports fashion health
religion celebs tv-movies music-radio literature webmasters programming techmarket

Links: (1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10)

Nairaland - Copyright © 2005 - 2024 Oluwaseun Osewa. All rights reserved. See How To Advertise. 50
Disclaimer: Every Nairaland member is solely responsible for anything that he/she posts or uploads on Nairaland.