amtaken:
Jada Pinkett is older than Will Smith. Dare Art Alade is younger than his wife. Prophet Mohammed was much younger than his first wife who was already a mother of many before they met.


Am not advocating for men to marry older men, but you people should stop being harsh on ladies. This is why abortion will keep thriving in our society.


Let the man in question seek the face of God to see if that lady is his God-ordained wife. If she's not God will let him know one way or the other. That lady was never married and marrying her is not a sin.

lequatee:
ok. mathematically speaking : she Is older than you so let's assume she has won in the x-plane. she Is a police ASP with more military influence than you so she has also won in the Y-plane. she has a job and 2 kids as backup while you have none. she has also won in the Z-plane. so my guy, she will win in the XYZ direction. in summary my guy, you are finished in 3D.
Q.E.D

Dexema:
there is no sexism here just plain reality, if the reverse were the case it would be allowable because the male is supposed to be the MAN in the house, or how does he act his role as a man in the house with no income? by just bleeping her? or haven't we seen cases where husbands lost their jobs and became frustrated thanks to their wives, and by the way I know what I mean by "militarised " women as I have come in contact with many force women and trust me very few of them are submissive and peaceful on the homefront .

HungerBAD:
Deep.

The truth is, we cannot choose who we will fall in love with it, and honestly, as long as you are happy in your relationship with her,then please do what your heart desires.

While it is good to be respective to our parents, we should learn how to draw that line between us and them when it comes to matters that affect our future directly.

If you want to marry her when you are settled ,approach your parents and tell them that what you need from them is their blessings, and not their money.

Goodluck.

cococandy:

No sexism but it's okay if it was the man?
According to whose law?

Oh boy.

Dexema:
on a final note, this is africa, Nigeria where a considerable chunk of resources for family upkeep is "expected" to be provided by the husband and hence the supporting role played by the wife, I hope you do get my drift, different lands, different laws, practices and ideals.

damostic2005:
Hello guys, I need your honest opinions, I'm 26years old and I'm in love with a 30year old lady. She loves me too and she's got 2kids already, she has never been married as the father of her children left her over 8years ago..

She's a responsible woman as far as I know because she takes proper care of her kids, she's fromAkwa ibom and she's a police officer (Asp) but my parents don't want me to be with her, they say because she's older and she's got kids and because she's not yoruba, that she won't be submissive and respectful to me, bla bla bla.

..I'm a fresh graduate am still job hunting though..but once I get a job and settle down, I'm willing to go all the way with her..

We have been off and on for 4years now..but one thing am sure is that she loves me and her kids love me too..please I'm I on the right path? I hope am not getting myself into trouble? Please I need your candid advise..thank you guys

cococandy:
OP If you can handle being a step parent, then you can do it.
As long as you're sure your visions align and you're compatible with her.

The only reason people are telling you to run is because of their prejudices against single mothers which stems from sexism and nothing else.
I bet if you were a single lady asking this about a single dad whom you're considering marrying, nobody would see it as taboo. Instead you may even be made to look bad for your unwillingness to jump in and be a perfect step mom for his kids.

So pls don't base your decisions on the opinions borne out of chauvinism.
Rather your real concerns should be in your ability to be a step dad to kids that aren't yours. It's not easy.
But If you believe you can pull it off, then you've nothing to worry about.

A good person is a good person regardless of whether she's a single mom or young girl that has never had a boyfriend.
Ask those who married virgin women and still ended up unhappy or divorced.

MrsPhyno:

Read carefully ma.... I'm saying I wouldnt do it, I wouldnt advise anyone to do it, if I loved anyone and they wanted to do that I would beg and plead with them not to do it

But he can do whatever he wants.

LyfeJennings:


There is nothing mature about a young man with no job dating an older woman with 2kids. I've seen it and been through it. They would have no common ground. The boy is thinking about a future for himself and the woman is thinking about future of herself and her 2kids with other relatives. The young man in question would bring NOTHING ABSOLUTELY NOTHING TO THE TABLE. U GOTTA THINK.. I AM TALKING FROM EXPERIENCE.
Q
I CAN DATE A COUGAR NOW COS I HAVE A JOB AND I'M DOING WELL AND WE WOULD DO FINE BUT NOT AT THAT AGE IN THAT SITUATION

ziego:



Those u mentioned are singles

This is a mother of 2
Ohooooo

A police man

And older as well


Abeg ooo truth must be told

She needs someone who can control her not whom she will control

konvict0111:
You have made an intelligent submission with your post on this subject, but I'm afraid your opinion has been influenced by your own penchant for the disease that is "Feminism".

Life is complex and is hardly defined by any rule, yet, from time to time, we must learn to commit to see beyond our noses, shun every form of sentiments and say the gospel truth no matter who is involved.

No matter the analysis we choose to do with this, a lady with kids from her teenage years must have been wayward in certain respect. I understand that there should be room for improvement in all cases, but we must learn to avoid choices that will damage us in the years and years to come.

I could just go on with my thoughts, but I'm obviously not a big fan of these things.

Analysiscorner:
It is you that would choose whom to marry.
Aside having bad character, you can confidently marry her. But talk to your parents with love, for them to see the reason why she is a wife material, if she is.
The two children that she already had is not a problem. In terms of responsibility, she is already working. In terms of morals, she's better than a lady that have had 2 abortions .
Love between you two, to me, is not infatuation, cause you have seen her character a little bit.Thinking like an African, she is still within the reproductive age.
And you are not alone in this- marrying a lady who is your senior.

Analysiscorner:

Yes! Having two kids during teenage age points to some previous waywardness .But she can't be more wayward than the lady with 2 or more abortions. This lady with 2 kids is not trying to hide her previous waywardness. But the one given to abortions is obviously trying to hide things from us.
Moreover we don't even know the circumstances that led to her having 2 kids for her former lover.

sheilak:


Well, that was not your inital argument

LyfeJennings:


Guess u misconstrued my words. The guy is not in love, he is not in the right position to decide if he is in love or not. His affection is as a result of idleness or fantasy, U can't give what u don't have. Dating an older lady is one thing, dating a single mum is another thing. Dating an older single mum of 2 is like 3 things rolled into one. Each of the 3 has unimaginable weight. This guy needs help to get a good job and work on himself

konvict0111:
You have made an intelligent submission with your post on this subject, but I'm afraid your opinion has been influenced by your own penchant for the disease that is "Feminism".

Life is complex and is hardly defined by any rule, yet, from time to time, we must learn to commit to see beyond our noses, shun every form of sentiments and say the gospel truth no matter who is involved.

No matter the analysis we choose to do with this, a lady with kids from her teenage years must have been wayward in certain respect. I understand that there should be room for improvement in all cases, but we must learn to avoid choices that will damage us in the years and years to come.

I could just go on with my thoughts, but I'm obviously not a big fan of these things.

Angelberry:

.

cococandy:
Disease that is feminism?

That's it.
I'm done with ya ignorant arse

If this was a convo, it ended there with that silly line.

Caseless:
how are you doing? Where have u been?

Angelberry:

Fine sir, you? am very busy.

GboyegaD:


I advise you go read your initial post again.

Spybradd:


whatever..my own is simple even for a donkey to comprehend,keep ur advice to urself,old man,b4 someone call u a loser..

mikolo80:
what are the consequences. everyone talking about consequences nobody not even the parents can mention 1

mikolo80:
answering question with question means you got nothing. just superstition and ignorance

Flashh:



Why are these folks so down to the bottom of iQ?

Spybradd:


reason is simple..we find it hard to make sense when blokes like u keep spilling thrash from the arsse..