Before confronting ur wife, u should have come to seek for advice from the gods first. U f**ked up by letting her know about ur findings. When you confronted her, where u expecting her to owe to the rubbish? She did what every other woman will do. And believe me, she will now go to tighten up every noose. U can't see her chats again, and too, if she ask u to go for the paternity test, she must be ready to go there to seal ur fate. So I advice u to go to her and apologize to her, make peace with her, tell her that you love her so much and u were scared of loosing ur precious to another man. Buy her gifts. But know that she will play along but she may still not believe in the drama. So wait till she put to bed. Don't tell her. Take the specimen to a hospital a hospital that don't know either of you. Do the test in about 2 to 3 hospitals. If the results tells you that you are not the father of the child. Then tell ur wife that you want to go for paternity of the child. She will say the same thing like she will give you hell. Agree. It will be worse for her and any hospital she pays to tamper on the result. Provided that u are sure of ur results, u can make money(lol).

MemphisRaynes:
Hi, please I need honest and mature contribution on this matter. I love my wife so much, and I don't want to have a failed marriage, not so early.

My marriage is only 18months old. This is my wife's first Pregnancy, but I am having serious concerns about the paternity of the baby.

I trust(ed) my wife with all my heart and soul. She was away on a Job training for 6 months. The training finished on May 19th and we made love same day. She told me she last saw her period in May 16th so we both assumed she was in her safe period by May 19th before we made love. Actually we didn't want pregnancy or a baby yet because we are strained by resources for now.

My wife started complaining of strong tummy pain, plus her period hadn't shown up by June 12, so we went for a Pregnancy test and she was confirmed Pregnant. In fact the Lab attendant told me she is very pregnant. Days after I went through her chat while she was asleep and came across her chat with some guy, the chat was very suspicious. Actually the said guy is a Gynecologist, so she had told him she was Pregnant immediately after the test so as to get medical advice. In this chat the guy called my wife "luv", "dearie", talked about she visiting him, and my wife's response was to play along. At some point she even said she can't wait to visit the guy. The height of it was when the guy asked "how is our baby doing?"

I could not control my emotions after reading their chat, so I confronted my wife. She claim the guy was her best friend, that they met at her training. Actually she has always freely spoken to the guy via phone in my presence before this event so I had no suspicions until I read their chat. We quarrelled and she cried and cried swearing that she has never been with any man but me. She said she was heart broken I am doubting the paternity of her Pregnancy.

On June 26th, we were at the hospital for ultrasound scan and medical check up. The Ultra sound scan report says the pregnancy was 7weeks and 6days on June 26th. Now remember we first met on May 19th after about 6 months, also remember May 19th was three days after her period ended, she was supposed to be in her safe period. Now Let's assume she conceived on May 19th, between May 19th and June 26th is not upto 7weeks and 6days. Again I confronted her with these facts and she's been very emotional, she threatened that we must do paternity test after the baby is born to prove me wrong, she also warned that she will make my life hell after that test for doubting her faithfulness to me.

Please I don't know what to do next, my doubt is not fading because the numbers and events don't add up, I need useful suggestions please. Kindly note that I trust and love my wife, a part of me believes the baby is mine, its the maths that don't add up, and her chat with her Gynecologist best friend that keeps fueling my doubt. What is the best way to handle my situation?

The baby is not yours. That calculation don't add up. Let be real here! She is buying time and find out about the Doctor. I guess once she puts to bed she would move to him. Don't allow her to suggest where the paternity is done when the baby is born. If am in ur shoes I won't wait. Start chasing those women you been tripping for.
Get one pregnant asap and as she is moving out to Dr your heavily pregnant side chick is moving in as wife. She won't believe when she hears about the way u moved on so fast. Anyways that's how I treat them hoes.

bros sorry, i think the baby is not yours, start looking for new wife that will not need to call another male " friend" for any reason. i also think you should stop eating her food till this is over just in case she put the charm on any part of her body, you need to stop touching her also.

finally kindly check under your bed for charms thanks. the part of you that trusts her is the charmed part. you just married a bad person. sorry
what ever made you check her phone is the self preservation you have left but has been over run by external forces (charms) this thin has no end run for you life bro.

bants.

too much talking. when baby come, do a DNA test. if its urs, plead with her to 4give u 4 nt trusting her. if nt urz, divorce her nd ask her to pay all u spent till baby was born. simple. 18months is to short for her to start misbehaving.

megareal:
Your calculation is way off. As someone already said, pregnancy is calculated from the first day of the last menstrual period which gives it an extra two weeks really. Scan may not be too accurate. That's why it's good for husbands to be acquainted with some aspects of a woman's pregnancy.

Truly, your wife said the exact same thing I would say to my husband if he doubted my fidelity. It's a promise she will keep to make your life miserable when the test comes out positive. Trust is already broken ,so go ahead by carrying out a DNA test after the baby is born. For your sanity and the baby's sake, just do it.

nonsense ....what kind of threat rather dan to end d marriage....is she God

Oga o.. Diff. people with their own problems! Believe me, Life experiences like this cum personal experiences with series of relationship does instills a great deal of fear in my mind- which makes me afraid of getting serious with a lady, not to talk of even settling down...

MemphisRaynes:
Hi, please I need honest and mature contribution on this matter. I love my wife so much, and I don't want to have a failed marriage, not so early.

My marriage is only 18months old. This is my wife's first Pregnancy, but I am having serious concerns about the paternity of the baby.

I trust(ed) my wife with all my heart and soul. She was away on a Job training for 6 months. The training finished on May 19th and we made love same day. She told me she last saw her period in May 16th so we both assumed she was in her safe period by May 19th before we made love. Actually we didn't want pregnancy or a baby yet because we are strained by resources for now.

My wife started complaining of strong tummy pain, plus her period hadn't shown up by June 12, so we went for a Pregnancy test and she was confirmed Pregnant. In fact the Lab attendant told me she is very pregnant. Days after I went through her chat while she was asleep and came across her chat with some guy, the chat was very suspicious. Actually the said guy is a Gynecologist, so she had told him she was Pregnant immediately after the test so as to get medical advice. In this chat the guy called my wife "luv", "dearie", talked about she visiting him, and my wife's response was to play along. At some point she even said she can't wait to visit the guy. The height of it was when the guy asked "how is our baby doing?"

I could not control my emotions after reading their chat, so I confronted my wife. She claim the guy was her best friend, that they met at her training. Actually she has always freely spoken to the guy via phone in my presence before this event so I had no suspicions until I read their chat. We quarrelled and she cried and cried swearing that she has never been with any man but me. She said she was heart broken I am doubting the paternity of her Pregnancy.

On June 26th, we were at the hospital for ultrasound scan and medical check up. The Ultra sound scan report says the pregnancy was 7weeks and 6days on June 26th. Now remember we first met on May 19th after about 6 months, also remember May 19th was three days after her period ended, she was supposed to be in her safe period. Now Let's assume she conceived on May 19th, between May 19th and June 26th is not upto 7weeks and 6days. Again I confronted her with these facts and she's been very emotional, she threatened that we must do paternity test after the baby is born to prove me wrong, she also warned that she will make my life hell after that test for doubting her faithfulness to me.

Please I don't know what to do next, my doubt is not fading because the numbers and events don't add up, I need useful suggestions please. Kindly note that I trust and love my wife, a part of me believes the baby is mine, its the maths that don't add up, and her chat with her Gynecologist best friend that keeps fueling my doubt. What is the best way to handle my situation?

Nigga, nigga, nigga

The baby ain't yours

Must you be told nigga ?

Seriously? Why ask questions if which you already know the answer ?

Fact is you need to pray for courage to do what you already know needs to be done ..

Divorce ain't nothing to be ashamed of

Stay strong brother

naturalwaves:

Your suspision is most likely right. Forget about all the acting rubbish. That's how most of them do. Some will even cry that you will almost apologise but na lie in most cases. So, don't listen to those saying relax bla bla bla.
Being a tech guy, I once spoofed a lady's MAC address and was following her up and getting all messages just so I know her well before putting my hands in fire. If you see what I saw, the devil himself will be shocked. After I confronted her in a subtle way, she kept on acting for me. More evidences , more acting....all those regular baby, I cannot believe you don't trust me bul.sshhit. Until I reeled out the undiluted chats. They are only sorry when caught.

The truth is that you married a flirt who does not have regard for the institution called marriage. Why would she call some other dude such sweet names when she has a husband. Some women are just heartless. How would she feel when you receive calls from females and call them " my love" , "sweet heart" etc. What is she going to see a gyna for? Just for a 7 week old baby? He even had the guts to say.....how is our baby doing. SMH.

The baby may turn out yours but your wife deserves no respect for disrespecting your marriage. Feel free to give out your numbers too and chat, call freely with females while calling them sweet names in her presence. Maybe she will come back to her senses.

Pls kindly teach me how to spoof. I am ready to pay. Pls sir.

eyinjuege:
Play along, and wait for the next 8months. Don't even mention it again
After delivery, just go to a center where they do DNA tests, and find out what you need to bring to do one. They may give you a swab, to scrape or rub on the inside of the cheek of your baby.
Collect it, and do that when you're alone with the baby.
Take sample back to the lab and do your test.
If the baby is yours, congrats. If its not yours, its still congrats. Do what you have to do/ your heart tells you to do.
Meanwhile, make sure you're also fertile before you make a decision on what to do if the baby isn't yours.

What sort of rubbish comment is this ? So meaning if he is infertile he should father another's child ?

Your have zero morals and will do anything to achieve your aim
I pity kids your have for they will be morally bankrupt

MicroBox:
Op Are you sure you are old enough to be a husband?
You are expected to quietly play along all through this period, home kit paternity test is available everywhere, Both old and new technology are also available to know 99.9 percent of who the father is.
You have already damage but not destroy your marriage with this suspicion.
When I took my wife for Ultra Sound Scan test, our calculation is far different from the result in-terms of the date she concieve (weeks difference ) but I am keeping cool until....
Though I read that, Ultra Sound Scan result always come with Plus or Minus two weeks.
Please just go tell your wife that you are sorry and make sure she forget about it before putting to bed. Anytime she raise the issue, tell her that you're just so upset about the chat and nothing more. Definitely after she put yo bed, she will immediately ask you to go for the test. Please and please never forget to tell her that you are sorry that she should forget about that....
But Dude, Please secretly collect the specimen, run to the lab and be sure of the baby paternity.

I think this is the post that'l try clear the mess.. Sorry about what you going tru.. Honestly, i am beginning to wonder if marriage is even worth it these days..

My brother,your wife may be carrying your child. Firstly,pregnancy age starts counting from the day of a woman's last period. Secondly,scanning is not a true test of determining the age of pregnancy,that is why you see most women are given expected date of delivery and will actually deliver a week before or a week after the given date. So if you put this into factor the date may add up. I will also advice you talk to your wife to mind how she interact with men and to choose her words correctly because men can take advantage of their weakness to lure them to their bed. A married woman has no business having the kind of chat she is been having with that Doctor.

Opoki:

Pls kindly teach me how to spoof. I am ready to pay. Pls sir.

You go get heartbreak o. Sometimes, I am always forced to agree with that statement ....." These hoes ain't loyal". Smh. Spoofing is not ethical jare. Just let sleeping dogs lie. Make God just help person chose, anyone you carry, just manage am like that

Awwwww!!! I now understand why these Nigeria guys are being treated like fools by their wives.

Just read all their suggestions and tell me that these guys are ok

These Nigeria guys irritate me to high heaven with their stupid utterances such as "If she finds out that you are the father of that child, she ll do this and that". Shooo!!! Are you guys that dumb and sissy that you can't call d bluff of your wife and still get your full respect?

This is what you get when you foolishly and stupidly fall in love

Back to Op, it's over, you are an Ode. You deserve to be cheated on.

Another time, consult the experienced brothers instead of coming online.

Let me burst your bubbles by letting you know that your hoe called wife has no respect for you.

It's obvious she doesn't dig you hence the cheating

And finally, if you take her emotional blackmail seriously, you are on a long thing. Women ll cry and swear with anything despite their involvement in the shameful act.

She has either cheated on you or still cheating

Shroud:


Let me begin by telling you never to stop insisting on paternity test. Don't be fool by the tears and emotions. They come easily to women, both good girls and hoes alike.

Let me also tell you that most fist children--infact more than 50% of them are children of paternal fraud! Yes.

I will also tell you that most women are more sexually vulnerable in a new environment as may be applicable when your wife went for her 6 months course or something.

Treat her kind now for her health's sake and that of the baby. After it is born , do your paternity test!

I endorse this advice

There are 3 things I prayed for in life.

Wisdom, knowledge and understanding.

After years of prayer, I realised that if I must have wisdom, I must be patient, if I must have knowledge, I must see things differently and if I must have understanding I must be able to control my emotions.

The 3 things the OP lacks, he's not patient enough, he lacks the ability to control his emotions and lacks understanding.

If you had waited and be patient, you wouldn't put yourself in a mess because the heap of information you will discover would have been massive if your wife is cheating on you.

This is why men are advised to follow up on their wives pregnancy journey but they wont listen.
Pregnancy is calculated from the first day of a woman's period, that is how 40weeks gestational period is gotten.

In addition scan is unreliable at giving gestational age(ask any gynecologist).

but since you hv already created doubt in your mind, i suggest you carry out a DNA test after d baby is born. only dat can give you peace of mind.

Its either the baby is or isnt yours but whatever the result is, prepare to live with it cos its going to be heartbreaking to either of the party at the end.

megareal:
Your calculation is way off. As someone already said, pregnancy is calculated from the first day of the last menstrual period which gives it an extra two weeks really. Scan may not be too accurate. That's why it's good for husbands to be acquainted with some aspects of a woman's pregnancy.

Truly, your wife said the exact same thing I would say to my husband if he doubted my fidelity. It's a promise she will keep to make your life miserable when the test comes out positive. Trust is already broken ,so go ahead by carrying out a DNA test after the baby is born. For your sanity and the baby's sake, just do it.

Bleep that, who cares?

Make his life miserable and get sent back to her parents

His wife is calling someone a sweetheart and you are here telling us that the stupid wife ll subject him to all sorts when the baby is finally here. Bleep that

People are just telling the OP to play on, and act like nothing is happening until the baby is born- like it's that easy to bear such life-threatening matter in mind; but, did you remember to ask him if he has the mind to bear it till that time ? na high BP dey knock be that(by the time blood rushes into the brain, due to too much thoughts, you'll know maybe the woman in question won't move on with her gynae. best friend). So, the earlier the better, you gas act very fast and know where your fate lies; know the baby paternity on time, just to know if you're now a dad or not yet(the ball is in your court)

N.B: DNA testing can be done as early as the end of first trimester of pregnancy ...

Well OP, i pray the Good God that never fails for once see you through this little tribulation....

Out of all the commenters here, I can only find 3 females dem don ja....dem know say the bros don ka....seriously though, statistics indicate that a man's instincts about the paternity of a child is about 72% accurate...that's pretty high. So if you ever doubt the paternity of a child, do a DNA test.

naturalwaves:

You go get heartbreak o. Sometimes, I am always forced to agree with that statement ....." These hoes ain't loyal". Smh. Spoofing is not ethical jare. Just let sleeping dogs lie. Make God just help person chose, anyone you carry, just manage am like that

I have never take any woman serious in my life but I enjoy it when I know what they do in the conferment of their room and still prove innocent, for instance, I innocently did a desktop whatsapp on my pc with someone's fone so I automatically receive her msg unknowingly to her... I feel ashamed with the information I discovered!

If you need to get to the root of the situation, never confront her with any suspicious message until the day the baby is born. For now, take away any discussion that has to do with DNA. This is because she might find a way of terminating the pregnancy as a way of covering up.

Opoki:

I have never take any woman serious in my life but I enjoy it when I know what they do in the conferment of their room and still prove innocent, for instance, I innocently did a desktop whatsapp on my pc with someone's fone so I automatically receive her msg unknowingly to her... I feel ashamed with the information I discovered!

If you see a good one,you can take her serious. After passing all the requisite tests though.

Sorry about your condition bro. Your wife may just be a bit immature about handling relationship with other guys but you need a lot of prayer and maturity to save your home and happiness.
1) In Obstetrics, the estimated gestational age (EGA) is calculated from the first date of the menstral period.
2)If your wife last saw her period on May 16 and let's assume she menstrate for 5 days (the commonest duration for young Ladies), so she started on May 12. From May 12 to Jun 26 is 45days making 6weeks 3days.
Estimated gestational age (EGA)= 6wks,3days and the expected date of delivery (EDD) =19/02/2018.
3) Ultrasound scan in early period is fairly reliable for calculating gestational age but its operator dependent.
4) Wait patiently after delivery and do DNA test , possibly at a teaching hospital to confirm the paternity.
5) DON'T ever raise the issue with her again... you will seriously hurt her if the pregnancy is truly yours.

6) Discuss with a genuine and enlightened man of God, not your mother or family members who will complicate the matters.

Trust and love are for dead folks. Wise up. This your wife may kill you.

MemphisRaynes:
Dude. Please do not call my wife that. If you got no help to offer, then just read and learn.

Ogbeni, shut up dia! as long as you have brought your issue to a public forum, anyone is free to give their opinion as the spirit directs. You keep a skank in the house and called that a wife? What business does a married woman has with referring to another man other than her husband as her love?
Someone is now giving you LaTruth, and instead of being grateful that you are being helped not to father another person's child, you are talking trash. It seems the pucci juice she has been giving you is yet to clear from your brain.

naturalwaves:

If you see a good one,you can take her serious. After passing all the requisite tests though.

I'm not a saint but I've come to understand that every being has a dark spot, to some, it is more darker, like very very dark and these set of people crucify, castigate and stone others for their wrongdoings.

Franky826:


lol bro relax till the baby is born. even though stories cannot be same but...

exactly same thing happened to my eldest brother and his wife. though he doubted the paternity of the child due to the timing of the pregnancy relative to when they had intimacy. bro nothing added up.
he doubted till he let my mum privy on the matter. as oldie with experience mum told him to relax. August 4th 2 years ago baby boy show.

1. Boy had a mismatch on his hairline in same position exactly like my brother

2. Boy didn't start talking on time exactly like my brother

3. boy snores in same pattern exactly like my brother

Now when you ask my brother if he needs to do a DNA test he will even slap you join

means nothing Mr. the only thing was his blood/genes was much stronger than the other alaye's own, so it subdued what would have turned out to be an exact replica of Mr. Patrick

Nairaboi:

means nothing Mr. the only thing was his blood/genes was much stronger than the other alaye's own, so it subdued what would have turned out to be an exact replica of Mr. Patrick

Gbam!

Opoki:
I'm not a saint but I've come to understand that every being has a dark spot, to some, it is more darker, like very very dark and these set of people crucify, castigate and stone others for their wrongdoings.

Yeah yeah. You are right!

MurphyTheory99:




The baby is not yours. That calculation don't add up. Let be real here! She is buying time and find out about the Doctor. I guess once she puts to bed she would move to him. Don't allow her to suggest where the paternity is done when the baby is born. If am in ur shoes I won't wait. Start chasing those women you been tripping for.
Get one pregnant asap and as she is moving out to Dr your heavily pregnant side chick is moving in as wife. She won't believe when she hears about the way u moved on so fast. Anyways that's how I treat them hoes.

The calculation adds up perfectly for her to be 7 weeks along. It's obvious you don't know how to calculate due date for a pregnancy. Stop giving bad advice and trying to destroy his marriage. If my husband played this game with me, he would find himself alone after I leave the hospital.

stuffs4me:


Is this one sane at all? He should keep telling a flirting wife sorry upandan?

Even if the baby turns out to be his own, the wife has battered the sanctity of marriage by having a "best friend" who isn't her husband. A "best friend" who calls her "luv" and other sweet cute name. A "best friend" that "can't wait to see her".

Its being awhile you joined nairaland so i believe you are very mature..though i doubt if you are married because if you do, you will understand how keeping a very peaceful home is important.What if the baby belong to the OP.
Please Start paying attention to how women think. Definitely flirting with another man is haram to me and you but the husband allowed the wife to work so flirting occasionally is a must. (Flirting does'nt mean sleeping around).