in my experience i have found that the more at home with herself and confident a woman is, the more open she is to meeting new friends (and this includes men). it is usually the uptight, "i am going to play hard to get even if it kills me" sort of women that end up with 8 months of lonely nights every year. don't get me wrong. playing hard to get when its done with moderation is neccessary for a healthy balance of the dating game. its when it gets taken to the extrem (and trust me our nigerian girls and maybe women in generally know how to do this) that it really gets crazy.
In my experience also, the best of women really don't play too hard to get. remember, the best things if life are free; that includes the best wives and lovers.
To our ladies, please don't over do it, do us both a favor and lets get together and build big happy families

But it's fun

yea that's all what mks him think back on d toasting days nd say my girl ain't cheap.but babes wait o, if we quick say yes them go say we nor just form we just jump put bt if we  nor quick them go say we take am to d extreme.na wa o

But it's fun Lips sealed Grin

yeh its fun until you wake up and find your 35yrs old, no messages on your answering machine, half your hair is grey, and men have to think about it before they accept an offer to spend a night with you. don't play too hard to get or else, , you may end up an old spinster at 45 with a cat as her best friend and sole companion

welli:

yea that's all what mks him think back on d toasting days nd say my girl ain't cheap.but babes wait o, if we quick say yes them go say we nor just form we just jump put bt if we nor quick them go say we take am to d extreme.na wa o

You missed the poster's point by a mile. Playing hard to get briefly is exciting and makes the game all the more interesting . . . going to the extreme only helps to push the fellow into the arms of another.
Moderation is the key.

moderation in all thing is the name of the game. too much of anything is bad. i know a girl who was so hot when i was growing up and just about every guy i knew who knew her wanted to date her. its over 20yrs now and i saw her not too long ago. she's old, earns a low meagre salary working with lagos state government and lest i forget, single and not too good looking these days. all that beauty she hard then is gone. she is left now with no husband and all her shakara to keep her company. a word is enough for the wise.

albridge:

yeh its fun until you wake up and find your 35yrs old, no messages on your answering machine, half your hair is grey, and men have to think about it before they accept an offer to spend a night with you. don't play too hard to get or else, , you may end up an old spinster at 45 with a cat as her best friend and sole companion

hehehe, true we women girls shouldn't take it too far  

watever the key is,so long as there is playin hard to get in the game

let me give you an example. met this wonderful girl once. she was truly the girl of my dreams; or at least thats what i tot. i would stop calling her when she wouldnt call me only for her to start flashing me. so hopelessly romantic me would start to think "maybe she's changed her mind and is now intrested" and would start to call her again, then she would start acting standoffish and stop flashing or calling. the cycle kept repeating itsself. after a while i got tired after a year of toasting. it came to a point when i only kept going after her just so she could accept to date me and as a result give me an opportunity to dump her. at first it i had undilluted affection and love for her. her playing too hard to get brought resentment into the whole equation so that my love for her then was now polluted. that was way back anyway. i finally got over her and let her be.

in my experience i have found that the more at home with herself and confident a woman is, the more open she is to meeting new friends (and this includes men). it is usually the uptight, "i am going to play hard to get even if it kills me" sort of women that end up with 8 months of lonley nights every year. don't get me wrong.

Sorry, I don't agree with that. You not being open does not mean you are not confident.

------->Poster
I feel you.

The funny thing about some girls is they eating his money and still keep saying they playing hard to get. if you like a guy and he's interested in you, you let him know. am not saying you can't do a little bit of shakara. but the key word here should be moderation.

impression says alot when it comes to dating and that happens within the first 60 seconds u meet someone. ladies that i know wont give the time of day or nite to reel out amorous intentions if they don't dig u frm day one. so that she's playing hard to get means ur still a contender and stil relevant in the scope of things. maybe she's just want to see how far u will go to get whats already urs ( am sure u've told a lady you'll cross the ocean for b4 )

p.s- beware of those who play that game while clutching their diggers ,shovels and harvest sack (gold diggers), like thonia said they don't like the taste of your honey but the love the smell of your money.

Sorry, I don't agree with that. You not being open does not mean you are not confident.

ever observe how fidgety and uncertain of herself a young woman is when she is around the age of puberty and is just learning how to handle her new found intrest in men and the attention that men are starting to show cos she has now started to grow breasts and look more like a woman? she behaves this way because she is not yet at home with this new side of her thats evolving. usually shes around 15yrs when this happens. check this same girl out sometime later when she is around 28yrs and you will notice that she is much more confident and at home with males and male attention. of course there are always exceptions but this is something i have found to be true in general terms.
too many matured women in between the ages of 22 and 26yrs still act like they are in or are just leaving the puberty stage.
you have spent the last 15minutes chatting with this otherwise intelligent and beautiful looking woman who appears to be enjoying the conversation and as you are about the leave you ask for her number and she goes on to give you that lame line some women like to use and asks, "what do you want my number for?" dumb, dumb, dumb. what do you think i want your number for, to write a song with it?

Sorry, I don't agree with that. You not being open does not mean you are not confident.

now there are times when a woman is already in a fulfilling relationship or when she is just angry with herself, or in a bad mood. its true that sometimes the timing is the problem. however even then, the experienced, well brought up women know how to show disinterest without trying to strip you of your dignity as a human being.
as far as they are concerned, you are not committing a crime; you are just too late cos she's already taken or your timing is wrong.

Am not quite sure y we ladies do alot of tins we do, i want to tink its becos of our genetic wiring we are so diferent from men, there are exceptions though wen it comes to playin hard to get, i neva did that, i know a man i culd date if he asks fine, if he is askin n he is so not put it in clear words "not in this life".
Bascially gals who post men need to grow up, nobody needs all that hassles. Ladies dont get me wrong am on ur side , but we need to get our acts rite, then we earn respect, know ur onions.

Am not quite sure y we ladies do alot of tins we do, i

like i said earlier, the more confident a woman is, the more she is able to relate well with others and hook up with a brother if she is intrested in him. it the one's who are not sure of themselves that play all those stupid games.
One of the reasons i know this is becos apart from watching some of these confident women from afar and observing how they handle their business with maturity, it so happens that the best relationship i have ever been in was with a lady who was certainly very confident of herself and someone that i found to be an asset.
of course she didnt just fall into my lap but she made it clear from the very start when i approached her that she was intrested in me too, shikena. she is easily one of the best women ever that will walk this earth.
Remember the saying, "the best things in life are free". I believe the best women in life are the one's who are stressless and who know what the want and who dont have time for most of the silly games women play.

i dont get it myself. dont know what all the shakara is all about. we have something they want and they have somethng we want. life is stressful enough. why do these women have to make it so much more stressful with all these thier stupid games.

For some reason I respect girls that play hard to get if I never ever get them! but if at last you finally land my net, I get diff view of them! (like after all that shakara kind of thing) and trust me drooping such girls are very easy especially when you look back at the stress you went through just to know their name and age 

I tried not 2 play hard 2 get n guess wat? A few months down d line he told me wanted space. Bottom liner, he dumped me

thank you my sister. when u give it 2 dem in a platter of gold they will stand u up. can u imagine the one i came down for, gave him everything. even my virginty. he has dumped me. make ogun kill am

@acidrop: Ogun all the way? that wan to much now! Haba? He might have taken your virginity but pray that God will send you someone that will accept you body, hearth, mind, and soul for who you are not just what he can get!

@Mandora and acidrop

you can play hard to get but it is in a good level, no one is asking you to give yourself out to a guy like so cheap you can sit and talk share better time and good sense of humor if you like the guy.their are billion's of beautiful girls in the whole world so if a guy should walk up to you please appreciate.

can u imagine the one i came down for, gave him everything. even my virginty. he has dumped me. make ogun kill am

now that is unfortunately how women play the game of love. when you guys are together he is your sweet heart, your hero and your prince charming. if you guys end up breaking up, he is an idiot, an ingrate and ogun should kill him. haba sister, aren't you taking things a bit too far here?

girls who play hard to get do so for a reason. They dont tell you they're in a relationship already. Once the relationshp brks, they open up slightly. I gs sm of youz wld agree even dou ths is not awayz so.

nhow, posters msg well understood.

yea that's all what mks him think back on d toasting days nd say my girl ain't cheap.but babes wait o, if we quick say yes them go say we nor just form we just jump put bt if we nor quick them go say we take am to d extreme.na wa o

Every time she is on the phone trying to triangulate the guy's present location
Thats what makes him say no be you be this
In his heart I mean

Mandora:

I tried not 2 play hard 2 get n guess what? A few months down d line he told me wanted space. Bottom liner, he dumped me

moderation they say

If you choke him with love, thats what you will get

acidrop:

thank you my sister. when u give it 2 them in a platter of gold they will stand u up. can u imagine the one i came down for, gave him everything. even my virginty. he has dumped me. make ogun kill am

He probably gave you his own too, if you were his first

Make ogun no kill am o , but wetin been happen

Don't really roll that way. . .i say what i want, how i want it and move on.
You guys are trying sha. . .my bro is the opposite, if you just start do am fluctuating signals. . .omo buh bye. . .doesn't have time. .

nice to know that some other men think the way i do

was trying to find my way to some place in surlere, lagos today. tried to get directions from a lady cos she was the closest one to me, said excuse me, started walking over to her so i could ask her if she knew so and so street and got the cold sholder. guess she tot i wanted to toast her. whats with all this female attitude problem?