₦airaland Forum

That's what you get when you joke about something that should not be joked about
>>Recall the backlash when someone joked about ra*pe on social media?

vicchi12:
Rules to being a side chick..

1. You are the other woman. This does not mean that you are the only other woman. Act accordingly.

2.
Please focus on the stolen moments that we spend together. Do not
concern yourself with my whereabouts when we are apart. Frankly
speaking, my life outside of our time together is not your concern.

3.
Be comfortable with who you are to me; do not mention my wife and/or
main woman, as she is not your concern. Do NOT compare yourself to my
main chick in any way and do not attempt to contact her -- to do so
would be a breach of our agreement.

4. Anticipate frequent changes in our plans; for the most part, a spur of the moment escape is the best that I can do.

5.
You must understand that maintaining a positive vibe while we are in
each other's company is vital to the success of our situationship. No
bickering or nagging about promises that I didn't keep.

6. We are
secret lovers; we can't blast our situationship to the world. Please
don't tag me on Facebook, and don't send me invitations to your
work/family functions or events. Major holidays -- more likely than not
-- will be missed.

7. No discussions about "where this situationship is headed." We are where we will be; together, in this moment. Enjoy it.

8.
Yes, I am still sleeping with my significant other, and we do not use
condoms. Again, focus on our time together, and not what I do while we
are apart.

9. I am not interested in bringing a child into our
situationship. By the way, an unplanned pregnancy will not force a
relationship commitment of any kind from me nor will it guarantee a
promotion to main chick status for you.

10. There are no
guarantees about the outcome of our situationship save one: I am a
cheater at heart, and that won't change unless I want it to. Until that
happens, if you are promoted to the main chick, please know that yet
another sidepiece will fill the vacancy that you've left behind.

And
one last piece of advice that my friend wants sidepieces to know: If
you choose to enter into a situationship with someone do not get
emotionally attached, as things won't be easy for you if and when you
separate.

http://m.huffpost.com/us/entry/5541789

**This, right here is exactly why I don't want to complicate my life. Thank you #teammainchick4ever&ever!

That's some good news!!!!

Op, God is punishing you for engaging in pre-marital sex

My best game: DADDY AND MUMMY

Linda, let's sue Goggle. We could make some cool doe out of the scandal - and we can buy more range rovers (and still show off!) to the shame of all the haters

dkronicle:
What kind of cards ? I just gaind admin and am thinking of makin ceremonial cards in sch.

All kinds of card. My best selling ones were Love (especially valentine), birthday, congratulations and Christmas (people used to buy a lot of cards during festive seasons, and are usually willing to pay more for customized ones with a little prodding . . . )
>>>That was my ticket to financial freedom in the University

My experience (2000 - 2005). While in the University, I made simple hand made cards which I sold for N50 apiece. On request, I made bigger ones. By my 300L, I even had paid distributors, most of whom were fellow students. I gave them 30% of money they got 4rm sales. I supplied certain shops and supermarkets. That was only one stream of income. Btw, I studied Law (and graduated with good grades).
*If my friends asked me to borrow them money, I usually asked them if they can sell cards!

kolykoldy:
How I wish I had a good heart.

It's your heart. You can choose what you want it to be - good or bad.

What is wrong with these Nigerian goats?

I once met a woman at an ATM. She had like 7 (seven) different cards. When she slots one, she will first check the balance, then withdraw like four or five times. She did not give a hoot about those waiting behind her. All the while, she was humming something to herself. Occasionally, she would glance back and give us that "you broke ass*s wait for your turn" look.

dumo1: its ok bro we all have things we are ashamed of. just glad u r alive, that was a close shave with death man.

@Dumo1: lol!!! I hear you. Thanks!

dumo1: Dude i hope u didnt share dis as testimony in church on a Sunday cos pastor go pour u holy water and cast out those imagined love demons in u.

Which kind testimony? This is the 1st time in 13 years I am actually giving a 'hint' of what I went through in the name of love (abi na craze?) I've been too ashamed to even tell anyone

7th September 2001, during the first Jos (Plateau State) crisis. I trekked from University of Jos (Bauchi Road) to check whether all was well with my girlfriend who lived near Hillcrest School - (about 9 Km) - AMIDST THE FIGHT, BLOOD, DEAD BODIES, SMOKE, GUNSHOTS, PANDEMONIUM, e.t.c. Only to meet another guy chilling at her place!
the sorrow I felt that day can only be imagined . . .
I almost got killed on my way back home. I Had to FLEE from an angry mob of armed youths.
>>>All because of "Love"!

(Judging by the picutres above) That plane doesn't look 'expensive' to me. I've seen some really cool jets! And this one is just normal . . .

TheShopKeeper: Sir, you are a man of integrity. Well done.

It's God's grace o! Thank you

I lectured in a Polytechnic located in South West Nigeria for four years. I went there as a Corper, and was retained. I'll share how I was able to stay unscathed all the while, keeping the 'pressure' from female students (and female Staff) at bay:

* As soon as I set foot in the community, I identified with the Christian groups and Churches. This kept me from any wilful compromise, even when I wanted to, or had the opportunity (there were lots of them!);

* I did not trust my natural instincts, so I kept my distance - especially from girls I found personally attractive (and there were in abundance);

* I tried not to stare too much - especially the ones that will come to class looking really seductive. Straight-facedness!!!! (no second look was my (still remains) my policy - no matter how fine a girl is)

* I performed my duty with diligence and strictness - meanwhile, I maintained cordiality and reasonableness;

* I always reminded myself that nothing remained a secret for long, especially among female students who would one day brag about how they 'conquered' yet another Staff, or about your prowess in bed - or otherwise;

* I also reminded myself daily that compromising with any of my students was like 'descending' to their level and that I should be prepared to eat the crumb of disrespect that it may occasion;

* I tried not to entertain female students who always want to come visit on any reason, except they are in the company of others;

* When they call, or sent text messages (they always have ways of getting your phone number) I replied as cordially as I can, maintaining a mental and emotional boundary that must not be crossed;

* (Don't laugh, please): I conspicuously kept a copy of the Bible on my desk;

* I flaunted pictures of my fiancée in my office and used it as my phone and computer screen saver (we were hundreds of miles apart);

* If I sensed that a girl was 'coming on' too strongly, I would politely ask her "HAVE YOU GIVEN YOUR LIFE TO JESUS?" (It works EVERY SINGLE TIME. They get embarrassed and never come back, and I guess, they go and tell the others)

* I maintained godly principles of transparency, integrity, purity, obedience to God, respect for constituted authority, diligence to duty, etc

* I treated every encounter with my students (in or out of class) as an avenue to influence them for good, not evil

* Can't think of the rest . . . (Its all about having personal godly values and principles!)

>>With time I gained a (not too good) 'reputation' for myself (they called me a monk, Jew guy, Holy-holy, Pastor etc). After a while, they all just IGNORED me, I think . . .
- Today, almost nine years latter, happily married with two daughters of my own, I recall those formative years WITHOUT REGRET AND NOTHING TO HIDE!

I like the "fat head" description of the 'fake' Shekau

S3x sells . . . I guess

After our engagement in 2010, my Dad called me aside and told me politely: "Don't even think about getting this girl pregnant before the white wedding. I don’t want any disgrace."
(Actually, the 'advice' took the form of a FRIENDLY WARNING)

Emm. . . who is he? Where had he been all the while? What had been his political contribution to his state & community?

Where beans na?

Actually, school (formal education) is overrated. Most of the basic survival skills (in my profession) that I now posses were learnt outside the classroom, on the streets, the hard way!

Marrying 1 lady 3 tyms (traditional, court, church): Nigeria.[/quote]That's true! Never looked at it that way...

Haba, why all the critical comments? The man was pressed. It was an emmergency situation necessitating drastic action (the location regardless). When nature calls, you better obey, for 'obedience is better than sacrifice . . .'

Let me add a few:
1. Don't disturb your neighbours with prayers at odd hours
2. If you have dogs, cats and other pets, rein them in
3. Keep your music to yourself
4. Don't blare your car horns endlessly for your family members to open the gate for you (especially if you don't have a gate man)
5. When smoking weed (and other similar things) please go into the bush. Better still, don't smoke at all!!!!
6. When fighting with your spouse, keep the volume down. That's your family business you don't have to disturb your innocent neighbours
7. Maintain decent cordiality (greet when you have to)
8. Do not covet your neighbour's wife, husband, daughter, son, houseboy, housegirl, gardener, driver etc (as the case may be)
9. Don't send your neighbour's children on errands for you (unless you have no reasonable choice and you are willing to 'tip' them)
10. If you block anyone's car with your car, be ready and wiling to move it without being grumpy. (Even if you have to pretend, keep a smile on your face while you are at it)

"Catalytic converter" - is this the thing they call Indomie?

I proposed marriage to my wife over the phone because of the distance between us. yes, WITHOUT A RING. We've been HAPPILY married for three years....
*Lesson learnt: NO MATTER HOW GLAMOROUS A [WEDDING OR ENGAGEMENT] RING IS, AND REGARDLESS OF THE CIRCUMSTANCE(s) IN WHICH IT WAS PRESENTED, IT IS USELESS AND IMPORTENT WHERE LOVE IS NOT SUPPORTED WITH UNCOMPROMISING COMMITMENT TO MAKE THE RELATIONSHIP WORK

See! I have no strenght for argument today. . .

Nice one! Wish I had read this 11years ago...

Okay, send me the Lamborghini Reventon asap

Please, can you rephrase the question? I've got Indians on my payroll