₦airaland Forum

dharay99:

any body with a summary of daht crap up der..?

LOL funny dude

Cutehector:
Op, from what you hav written, I think she is very good for you... Just like Saint Joseph, just accept her... Buh dnt marry her nw, until she graduates from school

You're indirectly saying I should get married in Four years time tho. I'm 30 oooh

Halo Great Nairalanders, Saluti a tutti voi.

I went to visit granny some days back, next thing she hands over a young pretty girl to me and says "Ashman, this is the kind of girl we want for you, marry her" She's a lay-reader in our family catholic church and sometimes comes to help us cook and clean at home here"

Perplexed, I looked at the prettiest girl I ever saw. She was so tall, ebony black, white teeth flashed as she smiled at me. Tommy flat like Lawn tennis bat. See straight legs that reminded me of Nino Simone. My eyes were fixated at her spandex as she said "Hi".
Sharperly, I cross-checked the Boobs, asss, figure 8, every-every as a Badoo, then i looked at her face, the only make-up she was wearing was a smile. Jesu! Halle Berry's beauty dey learn work. Infact halle Berry's beauty na apprentice.
According to Phyno "Nwaa di ka drawing onye sere ya?" (Meaning, this girl looks like a drawing, gosh! who drew her?).

Personally, I am not an advocate of arrangee hook-ups and all that but this particular girl, even her father has no right to stop me from knowing her. She looked so cute and naive and I was like a Knight in shinning armour trying to rescue her from all the ridiculous nigggas in angels' clothing that devour young girls around. LOL. Abi, my grandmother wanna arrange a girl for me to be sleeping with ni? All these elderly women have plans too o, I thought sub-consciously as she excused us.

I'll be damned if I don't start up a conversation asap. One hour later, we were still discussing, chit-chatting, laughing and we talked at length. In fact, within a space of one Hour, I went half across her personal life. She's a first class student studying Med/Surge in IMSU but still in 200L. Course duration should be Six years. I feigned to be comfortable with her level but I also needed to consult myself before I arrest myself in my absence. We talked about relationships and then her countenance was crystal clear, showing that there was a vacant space in her heart for me. I just 'taya'

Well lemme not start writing tales by moonlight here, the girl and I has been talking on phone since then. Virtually everyday she calls to know if I've eaten, showered, prayed etc. Such a nice angel.

Over to you guys, is her university level a bottleneck? her age is 21 or thereabout.

Grazie per la risposta

CC: farano
Rocktation
Lalasticlala
Ishilove

Bekwarra:
Oops Nigger sounds pained. Sorry bro. Nonetheless, you need to improve your English before next year.

English Language. Olodo!!!

lokito:
thisghtbdkbgtymabdhdhdjjsnbSense

What language? And meaning? Pls

Hmm... nice story but I don't like it when the storyteller is telling another person's story

"The jury was always out and now this inevitable industrial court case got me standing in the jury box for the umpteenth time. Everyone that made me stand here probably committed idols of the mind for keeping me vertically stationary without measuring time constants, infact idols of the market place in specific. I was perplexed when my Lawyer advised me to lie to the Judge that i didn't receive any calls that morning. For a while i listened to him in taciturnity and was drowned in the sea of my thoughts. In my critical historiography of every war of attrition and belligerency LIES emerge. All lies comprises a pathological hoarder. Whenever a liar lies , he needs other lies to suppress the first lie. Infact he improvises the inital lies to invent a better lie to convince the listener of the lie so that the compounded lies will seemingly not be pictured as lies.
Most times he unknowingly entertains the listener when the listener actually knows the truth. In such cases, he tries to create a mental picture of the truth in the mind of the listener with lies not apt enough to commensurate the initial lies.
i told the magistrate right in front of my Lawyer that i received that call... Now the truth has made me a free man and i am typing this terse masterpiece in my cozy apartment like a free radical atom.
Let hands be put on deck as we make ourselves Senior advocates of the TRUTH (SAT). No matter the circumstance the truth shall always set you free"... Ashmanpolo

freebloke: 6th

Hmm my twin blooder

Only wish Seun could improvise on some buttons

(Quote) (Report) (Like) (Hate)

Yhemmy11: Always live ur life as if Jesus Christ died yesterday, resurrected today, coming back tomorrow.

This is the best post ever on nairaland. 1M likes

True love no be by energy o... Wiz boy

Why am i hearing a collapsing sound 'kweke kweke' on the bridge...Godhelpuso.

Why men have better friends

Friendship between women: A woman didn't come home one night. The next morning she told her husband that she had slept over at a friend's house. The man called his wife's 10 best friends. None of them knew anything about it.

Friendship between men: A man didn't come home one night. The next morning he told his wife that he had slept over at a friend's house. The woman called her husband's 10 best friends, 8 of which confirmed that he had slept over, and 2 said that he was still there.!!! =))

Ko fe fi ijo gba owo mor ni?

Nonso23: The first slice is my favorite for some odd reason though.

Odd like u don't wanna waste food or so that the bread will go round for the family? Which 1

I would like to know this cos I have noticed that lotta people don't eat the first slice of bread here. When I travelled abroad same thing too. I kinda wondered if there's any health-related issue with the top n bottoms of sliced bread.


"Niggas be eating ass like mad but won't eat the first slice of bread"

lokito: How is the word 'saddist' spelt again o.
i think the correct spelling is D, Y, T

Lmao

nkem Kalu: The machine is already in use.....(See Trisha Program on DSTV channel 127).

Da wan na lie detector na

FP Joor make some people learn courtesy

Somebody like SAGAMITE will just fall out...

@OP, you' re a person, a demented cretinous cretin from a failed educational system, how can u be in love with your husband's cousin. person"

Lol... Some people here dey already vex before dem enter www.nairaland.com

Everybody is just saying DUMP, DUMP, DUMP. Do y'all know what it means to leave a guy you truly love? Unless she doesn't love him

My first big cash was 100k, in 2007. When Rivers State government paid Corpers 10 months state alawee.
Omo the night before that day I nearly madt meehn. Insomnia wan ki mi die, imagining that I would be 100k richer the next day after a protracted meltdown in my pocket.
I collected the money that day from the secretariate, my whole body shaking like I was made of paper. Everybody around me was a suspect. My friends that I was laughing with earlier that day were surprised the way I discharged them.
Omo I was heading to the bank and for all I knew bike men were even more dangerous, so no need of bike. For every two steps I took, I looked back like 10 times because somebody was seemingly following me.
I no wan hia story.
Even in the bank, I had to bypass the queue, guy robbers fit enter here at anytime o. Meehn dat was dramatic o.

Guys share yours

Qwee2: I guess That Question Is meant For YOU

Mumu do u even know why I asked that question? Moronic cretin like u

"It was a total disaster. As soon as I walked in, Stella became extremely nervous. Funny thing is dat bros called her Mariam. For all I know she used to be Stella in Zaria those youth service days and a RUNS-inclined person at that.
Now bros thinks there's a conspiracy of silence because I have refused to tell the whole house how I know this girl.
And bros is heads over heels in love, with a call girl at that.
Confusional Conference. How would you gird up the loins in your heart to tell your elder brother that the girl he's about to get married to was your bed warmer?"

hamzatseyi: @Op when did u graduated 4rm yaba left ?

A better question is "who was your English teacher,YOU?"

.

Nice comment my brother

Someone should tell Mourinho to play Mata ooo. Him bench don dey carry seat belt

asha 80: it is on vanguard online.

U r correct