₦airaland Forum

Oh Lord Let me DUROSOKE because I'm with you PERSONALLY and let my Enemies see GOBE and dance SKELEWU 2 Hell during dis eclipse..amen

I wish i knew what u are talking about buh all i know is dat When i was young i used to be afraid of the dark but now that i'm matured when i see my electricity bills i'm afraid of the light..

Well am glad dat after many months of leaving d dead body in d mortuary,dis old lady gets to rest in peace...kudos Mrs boko haram English speaker.


They say The rain makes all things beautiful.
The grass and flowers too.
If rain makes all things beautiful
Why doesn't it rain on you..?

Abeg who know where i fit get unused old layer fowl?

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Lets tell our self d truth,eti family needs a lot of upgrade....dis guys need help i swear

Welcome to another movie titled NOVEMBER,the season 11 of 2013 with 30 episodes of 24hrs per scene.Stay tuned as God unravel His riches and glory upon u.amen

#BIGWIG

Another producer saved..if u like go & starting weeding & drinking spirits,dis time nobody go answer u....anyways,thank God for ur life.

Dude am happy for u,nairaland expect my own Guinness book of record breaking....

Buh did u know dat An average woman eats about 2-3 kilos of lipstick in her lifetym...just to look like an expensive babbon

#BIGWIG

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Whether she quits or not,nigeria will still b corrupt....corruption is deep down in our vein...abi u wey dey read my comment never peep for person book for class??..abeg who cares..



I bet Messages from mobile
operators in 2050 will say "DEAR
CUSTOMERS, GET YOUR WIFE
PREGNANT TODAY WITHOUT
STRUGGLE, SMS "CHILD" TO 12345"


who am i??--#BIGWIG

Cool write up op buh u sound as if u av been scammed before,anyways great piece of advice....



Btw
When i was young i used to be afraid of the dark but now that i'm matured when i see my electricity bills i'm afraid of the light.


#BIGWIG OPENED DIS THREAD

Hmm

Booked

Ofcourse they will deny it naa,abi u wan make dem kidnap am??....fear those politicians o cos dey can do anything to win...




Btw people need to STOP BOASTING…….

• Some are proud of Blackberry phones, BBM is
now even in Techno phones.
• Some are proud of ipad tablet computer not
knowing that Secondary students at Osun State
are using it free for their studies.
• Don’t boast about your Jeep SUV because that is
what some airport taxi operators use at Abuja
airport.
• Why must a Nigerian boast of travelling by air
when other Nigerians are placing an aircraft on
charter just to carry a corpse?
• Never boast of the numbers of degree you have.
World top billionaires are not graduates.
• Don’t boast of your beauty.-‘Charm is deceptive,
and beauty does not last’- Proverbs 31:30
• Never boast of your height. Aki and PawPaw are
worth over 50 Million Naira each.
• Be humble always. Whatever you are today or
have achieved is not just only because of your
hard work and smartness. The grace and favour of
the Lord is upon your life! Appreciate the role of
God in your life’s achievements.
Goodmorning ...

#BIGWIG

From www.salon.com i guess

Oppypoppy: Guy whr u get dis one?

What if there was a funny lecturer or some funny dude in d meeting,won't they still leave d meeting with a smile....abeg who cares about smile..mtshww

Just imagine,i heard some parts of lagos were shut down even d business area Like as if dis crown will make me a dim richer....mtshww....abeg read below & see what happened to me yesterday
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You won't believe what happened to
me yesterday night.
I was coming back from somewhere
around 9pm when i saw this beautiful
damsel approaching me.
She has the the beatiful face of
Beyonce,
The sumptious lips of Angelina Jolie,
The backside like that of Kim
Kardashian,
The curves were like that of Mercy
Johnson,
She got the height like that of Angela
Okorie,
Her eyes were as beautiful as that of Ini
Edo,
She got the forehead of Rihanna,
With bumper front package like that of
Cossy Orjiakor.
She was looking innocent like
Gennevieve Nnaji.
I knew i had to talk to her, it will be the
greatest mistake if i allow her pass
without talking. So i said
"Hi"
She didn't replied but she smiled.. So i
continued
"My name is BIGWIG, i will love to talk to
you but am in a hurry right now, pls
can i get your contact so that i can call
you for us to meet?"
She smiled again and said


"Ok, ZERO HATE ZERO, TIRI TIRI HATE,
SEFUN TWO TIRI, NOI NOI.. NA MY
HENTIHEN LINE BE DIS. YOU WANT MY
SAIN LINE?"
I fainted!!

#BIGWIG *brings out peniis* pissed here

I just love #LAGOS state just like d way i love akpos & his foolishNess...check dis out

Akpos was eating bread in the dream,after he finished eating it, he saw a coconut and decided to eat it too but he didn't see knife to cut it, so he decided to use his teeth only to receive a slap from his father! U DON FINISH PILLOW,NA MY HEAD U COME DEY BITE IDIOT!.

#BIGWIG

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Ndi ochi flexing our cash.mtshww abeg who wan laugh should read below
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Peter : Your secretary is very sexy....!
Tony : Thanks! It's a robot actually, named " Maria " If you squeeze her right breast, she takes dictation & if you squeeze her left breast, she types letters! I'll Send it to you for a day & you can see her functions..

Next day.............!!!! Peter called Tony from hospital & shouted : You bastard! You didn't tell me that the ''' HOLE ''' between Maria's legs is a pencil sharpener

#BIGWIG noni

Buh why are does guys protesting naa,i think she deserves her sack sha #BIGWIG'S thought

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Btw Please and please, ladies should not just go to any beautiful car parked, borrow thier friend's phone, snap themselves, upload and write..."Me beside daddy's car" because it happened to a lady who always changed her pix with different cars she snapped with. This time, she was unlucky as the beautiful jeep she snapped with and uploaded with comment..."Me infront of shoprite with daddy's car" had a small cartoon ontop boldly written...."CAR FOR SALE ".
Oooooppps.

#BIGWIG passed here

Pls dis guy obviously doesn't deserve second chance,hope does bombs he dey organise still remain.pls exploded dis dude ....


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A group of men gathered at a church conference on how to live in a loving relationship with their wives.
The men were asked, "How many of you love your wife ?"
All the men raised their hands. Then they were asked, "When was the last time you told your wife you love her ?"
Some men answered today, some yesterday, majority didn’t remember.
The men were then told to take
their cell phones and send the following text to their respective wives: I love you, sweetheart...
Then the men were told to exchange their phones so one can read the other wife's reply to the love message.
Here are some of the replies:
1. Have you impregnated someone again
2. That was then, not now
3. You wan borrow money abi?
4. What did you do again? I won’t forgive you this time.
5. Meaning?
6. Is that a new song?
7. Am I dreaming?
8. If you don’t tell me who this message is actually for, you will die today!
9. U dis man!! I asked you to stop drinking.
10. Abeg na who be this?

#BIGWIG

My dear u should be happy u escaped from their hand cos boys of nowadays ain't smiling.

Among her many grammatical
exploits
include:
1. My husband and Sambo IS a
good people.
2. The President was once a
child and the
Senators were once A children.
3. My fellow widows.
4. A good mother takes care of
HIS children.
5. The people sitting before you
were once A
children.
6. Yes,we are all happy for the
effort, it is not
easy to CARRY second in an
International
competition like this one,
(addressing press
men after Female Under- 19 FIFA
World Cup).
7. The bombers, who born
them?
Wasn't it not a woman? They
were once A
children now A adult now they
are bombing
women and children making
some children a
WIDOW.
8. My heart feels sorry for
these children who
have become widows for loosing
their
parents
for one reason or another.
9. We should have love for our
fellow
Nigerians
irrespective of their NATIONALIT
Y.
10. Thank God the Doctors and
Nurses are
responding to treatment.
11. I would rather kill myself
instead of
committing suicide.
12. Ojukwu is a great man, he
died but his
MANHOOD lives on.
13. President did not eaten
since morning
14 I donate me and my family on
behalf of
N20million
I wish her more fruitful years
ahead with long
life,prosperityand more
grammatical
splendour......
..............................
............HAPPY
BIRTHDAY TO THE FIRST LADY**

#BIGWIG pissed here

Oboy na money dey insult him grandpapa oo...buh ladies stop Waiting For Mr Right, Tell Your Mr Left to Move to the RIGHT.....

#BIGWIG's thought

Hahahahahahaha........Iraq think say na bomb we come here 2 tro lolz! buhehehehehe....... 5 kpondo hehehehehehehehe....... ndi ara unu na awa anya.... Anyways,good to know about d interview

#BIGWIG

# Ugly girls getting married every
Saturday, the pretty ones will be
buying ASO EBI, looking glamorous
in the wedding pictures, waiting for
Dangote's son.

# Shout out to all the girls who feel
they need to wash noodles before
cooking it. I respect your Hygiene.

As for her,she rocks