₦airaland Forum

People should learn to mind their manners before they give wrong impression of their upbringing. Someone wrote of his father's experience - the next thing is to insult the man. Would you dare insult anyone's father if you were standing next to them? Is it because we are on internet, therefore you take license to insult people's parents. Abeg, this is taking so-called feminism to ridiculous extent.

@ nwando and d-reloaded,

pls get your science right before you go on your usual male-bashing tangent. Pls google 'alkali+vagine+sperm' and land educate yourselves on 'acidic' and 'alkaline' vaginas.

Get your facts right please -

1. if a woman has strong vaginal secretions [the so-called 'acidic vagina', odds are that she will produce more of female than male kids because male chromosomes can't stand acidic vagina


2. some woman NATURALLY have more 'alkaline vaginas' than others. Such women are more likely to have male children


Pls I have seen from PERSONAL experience where a man was married to a woman for donkey years with only female kids but immediately he married another woman, he had male kids. 2 examples that I know of personally. Now I would advise a man in such situation to go for sex selection rather than marry another wife but the fact still remains that feminists like to use this male vs female chromosome thing to bash men.

Fact is - some women are NATURALLY more receptive to male chromosomes than other women due to acidic vs alkaline vagina



For more education pls see -

http://www.practicalparenting.co.uk/conceiving/Choosing_your_babys_sex_article_86944.html

http://www.ovulation-calculator.com/shettlesmethod.htm

LadyT:
Sorry can someone tell why they stayed together? animals,

for the sake of their kids perhaps. does that make them animals?

ifyalways:
. . .good for them.sweeeeeeeeeet wind of change is blowing

watching your mum batter your dad to death is good for the kids?

Wife beats husband to death in Calabar | Print | E-mail
Written by John Ighodaro
Saturday, 23 February 2008
Saturday Vanguard

When Mr. Frank Enya Edu, a lecturer at the Cross River State University of Technology (CRUTECH) first met his wife, Christiana, seven years ago, he had no idea she would be his instrument of transition to the great beyond.
Days ago, however, after a not-so-blissful union which regularly featured violent confrontations and fights, the final fight between the couple turned fatal for Mr. Edu who until his death was pursuing a PhD at the University of Calabar as well as being a lecturer at CRUTECH.

According to Saturday Vanguard sources, trouble between the two largely stemmed from the man’s insistence that the woman go back to school to update her education.

Unknown to the man, the woman had a deep-seated desire not to go to school. She had once attempted the Senior Secondary School Examinations and the result was not quite satisfactory and she had since had no intention of going back to retake the examination. This fact, her husband ignored or did not seem to understand.
Oftentimes, the husband would raise the issue of her going to re-enroll for the SSSCE to enable her garner enough credits for admission into the university and she repeatedly told him she was not interested and even suggested to him that she would like to be a farmer.

The husband was uncomfortable with a situation where he would have a PhD, but his wife would have no SSSCE or a degree at least.

Narrating the story, the elder brother to the deceased, Mr. John Edu said, “the matter started some months ago when my younger brother, was offered appointment with the Cross River State University of Technology, as a lecturer in the Department of Chemical Sciences.

“There have been trouble in the house over the need for her to go back to school, and our family members have made several attempts to settle the matter to no avail.

“The woman said she does not want to go to school, instead let the husband use the money for their wedding. My brother on several occasions invited our family, pleading with her that he was offered appointment just some months ago. She should go back to school, let the wedding be done after he has settled down on the job. She said that would happen only over her dead body.”

Continuing, John said, “based on that the husband decided that if she did not want to go further in her education, she should go back to the village and continue with farming, because he was complaining always that she was embarrassing him in the house with her behaviour each time they had a visitor.”
Chritiana, according to John, apparently interpreted the decision by her husband to have her go back to the village as a plot to do away with her and marry an educated woman.

His words: “They have always been quarelling and fighting over the matter, and actually, there was a scuffle in the house at that moment before my brother was killed. The truth is that the woman is a fighter. She has been fighting even in motor parks,” he added.

John said he was not there when the fight that claimed his brother’s life took place, but that he gathered from neighbours that when the fight started, it lasted for some time, then his brother left the house.
His words: “My brother left the house, and came back about an hour later, thinkng it was all over only for the woman to launch another fight against him. I was not there when it happened, but somebody called me soon after the fight to inform me that my brother had been killed.

“From what I was told, as my brother returned to the house, the woman confronted him again, asking him if he had come back to the house to meet the illiterate woman. She said if my brother did not kill her she would kill him.”
It was gathered from neighbours that as soon as another round of quarrel erupted in their room, the woman allegedly locked the bedroom door, picked a stick and with it, hit her husband on the head.
Frank, it is said was at that moment trying to unlock the bedroom door. “It was apparent”, said John, “that each of them had a cane because my brother died with stripes all over his body and the woman is now in the police cell with the similar lacerations on her body.”

Giving her own side of the story, Christiana blamed the fatal fight on her husband’s conduct.
According to her, “it is a lie, I did not use any stick on him. He started the fight. After beating me with the cane, it broke into pieces. He took a second cane, after that he took a third cane, so I got angry, seized it and started beating him. It was the cane that I used in beating him, so he fell and hit his head on the wall and fainted.”
It was at that moment that the woman panicked, bundled the husband on to an motorbike to the hospital where he was confirmed dead.

Saturday Vanguard gathered that the marriage while it lasted was blessed with three kids. The first child of the union, Favour Edu (7) who said he witnessed the fight told the police: “it is mummy who killed our daddy. Mummy used a stick and hit him on the head and he fell down and died

AJ,

Ben Nnawuihe was not contesting election with Dr. Okechuku directly. He was a supporter of Dr. Okechuku's opponents in an Igbo organization presidency elections in Dallas. Supposedly as part of the campaign strategy against Okechuku, Ben released a statement to all the Igbo organizations in Texas accusing Okechuku of breaking up his marriage by committing adultery with his wife, Rose and thus Okechuku was morally unfit to lead any Igbo community in Texas. Some other people came out to testify that Okechuku also committed adultery with their wives and broke their own marriages too. A few days after Ben's press release, Rose came out with the press release which started this thread. Because her allegations were so sensational, it was her version of the story that got the most play on the internet and among Nigerians in US.

NB Okechuku has never responded directly to the various adultery allegations made against him by various men. One of the Okechuku's townsman in Dallas who confronted him on the adultery allegations and reminded Okechuku that he was a married man, later reported that Okechuku did not deny or confirm the allegations but merely replied him that ", a ga na ra otu?" [we no go f@#K again?] Okechuku's campaign focussed on his record of pubic service and potential contributions to the progress of the organization. Apparently, most members of the Igbo organization felt that they should follow the Clinton-Lewinsky model. All the adultery allegations were treated as private affairs between Okechuku and the husbands of the women that he allegedly seduced with money plus his status as a medical doctor. Okechuku won the election.


For me, the most disturbing allegation about Okechuku is not even whatever Ben or Rose said. There was an allegation around that time by one of okechuku's townsmen [lets call him 'Emeka'] that okechuku took advantage of 'Emeka' and his wife's illegal status to sexually exploit the wife. 'Emeka' alleged that their child had a medical condition. They had no health insurance and they could not get treatment at public hospitals as illegals because they were scared the INS could trace and pick them up with the medical records. Okechuku allegedly agreed to treat the child privately on cash-and-carry basis. Unfortunately, the treatment was highly expensive and since Emeka and wife were both illegals doing the usual dime jobs that naija peeps in that category do, they could not meet up financially. 'Emeka' alleged that while he was working out of state, that Okechuku offered free medical treatment for the child as an inducement to the woman to let him have his way. Since 'Emeka' was away and was not sending money regularly, the woman succumbed. There is no way to verify the truth of this allegation. Since the couple are still illegals, they are too scared to report Okechuku to the Texas medical authorities or take legal action. Anyway, the 'Emeka' guy eventually reconciled with his wife after she apologized and explained why she had to do it. As far as I am concerned, this story of exploitation of 'Emeka's wife is far more serious and evil than whatever went down between Okechuku and Rose.

Try Omni Plaza at Ikeja GRA near Air Force officers Mess. In fact the officers mess has a hall that can be hired by civilians.
Archbishop Vining Church on Oba Akinjobi Rd in GRA also has a hall. There are loads of hotels on that Allen, Opebi and Toyin axis - many have halls

Just have the frigging sex at the same time, with all the wives "working" on the husband. Angry Undecided

eat egusi, edi ka ikong, efo riro, ogbono and nsala soup ALL at the same time?

e no go sweet laik dat. na nsala today, egusi tomorrow,

variety is the spice of life but all at the same time na extreme greediness

hotfunmi - Because they were under the law handed down to them by religion and ridiculous culture. How many of these women do you see today getting married as second, third wives?

come lagos, make ah show you big girls working for mtn and zenith bank who are third wives today. from there, make we go abuja, make ah show you lawyers and perm secs who are 3rd wives today

the fact is that women do not all reason the same way - just like men. there will always be women prepared to share men while the nwandos and michelins see it as an abomination. every woman's situation is different and she will respond to such issues based on her situation

e.g. the marriage options available to a 35 year old naija woman doctor in naija are not the same as she would have in the us. in america, she is an extremely hot cake just for being a doctor alone and dozens of naija guys will be begging for hand in marriage. even nurse and pharmacist sef, dem dey beg dem for marriage talk less of a whole doctor. but in naija, 35 year old female doctors are 2 for ten kobo. come to LUTH or UCH and you will see them plenty. so the one that is in naija's options will be more limited and she then considers being a second or third wife.

as for my personal take on polygamy? you women una wahala too much! one woman's wahala is more than enough for me for a lifetime!!!

but i respect the right of those men and women who feel they can cope with polygamy to do so as long no one is conned or forced into it

I find it interesting that none of the women here seems to have any interest in the angle of Mrs. Vivian Okechuku, wife of the Dr. Okechuku accused of being Rose's lover? Are y'all saying that because Ben allegedly enslaved, exploited and battered Rose that she is entitled to seek comfort in the arms of another woman's husband? Don't y'all have any sympathy for your fellow woman?

michelin,

do u know that there are women lawyers, doctors, accountants, bankers, permanent secretaries etc who are second or third wives to their husband? do you know that many of these women married their husbands long after they finished schooling and were already established in their professions/careers?

even if such a law as you propose is enacted, there will ALWAYS be women willing to be second wives. the law will only deter the gold diggers who married the polyamous men solely for their money. but it won't deter women who have their own means but just want a husband to call their own - along with half-a-dozen other women - and be father to their kids.

mind you, the educated, professional 3rd wife will surely see to it that oga writes a will and builds a house for her in his lifetime

btw, its already the law in nigeria that if a man dies without a will, some of his assets e.g. retirement benefits, insurance etc will go to the folks named as next-of-kin. many polygamous men listed their first wives as their NOK when they were beginning their working careers and still had only one wife but never remembered to change it after they married more wives

hi nwando,

sorry, the 3rd para of my last post should actually have read - "What if he always made it clear that he can NOT stay with only one woman and will most likely marry more wives in future? Since the woman went ahead to marry him knowing his intention, can she complain after that he is a polygamist?"

i'm not so sure about most females kicking the man to the curb if he makes this proposition flat out to the would be first wife. a lot would depend on their geographical location and respective socio-economic situations. many women in nigeria do not have the opportunities and options available to their sisters in the west. a wealthy man can literally have his way in many ways

and even then, how about all those naija baby mamas in america? many dudes have baby mamas in houston, dc and nj. all the women know about each other and that the dude is servicing all of them. are these women not in polygamous marriages in reality? why don't they walk away?

most nigerian/african women are very hypocritical about polygamy. they keep bashing naija men over polygamy yet keep firmly tight lips on the serial monogamy prevalent in the western societies.

with divorce rates in america now at 50% within the first 7 years, i'd really love for an african female resident in america to explain to me just how serial monogamy in america is superior in any way to good ol' african polygamy! specifics would be most appreciated

nwando,

i think we are agreed that where a man marries a woman with the vow of her being the only wife for life, it is wrong for him to marry more wives and wrong for other women to accept to be his junior wives.

now how about a man who married the first wife under native law and custom and so never made any vow or commitment to her either while they were dating or during the native law and custom ceremony that she will be the only wife. Is it wrong for him to marry more wives in future?

What if he always made it clear that he can stay with only one woman and will most likely marry more wives in future? Since the woman went ahead to marry him knowing his intention, can she complain after that he is a polygamist?

i hope you know that many people in nigeria are still formally married even though they have separated years ago and no more live together for a very long time. Maybe the man does not want to legally divorce the wife so that in future their kids will not be mocked as coming from a broken home. Now assuming the man takes another wife under native law and custom, is he now a polygamist even though he has not co-habited with the first/legal wife for many years?

I remember seeing a pregnant woman in wheelchair with atrophyied legs [due to polio?] and a little kid by her side. I kept wondering -
1. how exactly her hubby did the nasty with her - how on earth did he manage to keep her curved legs apart long enough to make her preggie?
2. how she managed for 9 months with big swollen tummy in that wheelchair - must have been hell for her - and still let hubby knock her up again

god is great sha!

wetin blacklion do u?

We don't even know how true or fabricated the story is.

may god bless you j-girl. its good to see a woman who can look at an issue from both perspective - not just side with her fellow woman because of her gender.

you are absolutely correct - both ben and rose have disgraced their children. what i posted above is just a mere tip of the iceberg. they posted even worse things about each other on the internet.

there is no way to know which of them is telling the truth - or even what the 'truth' is in such situations where husband and wife are trying to paint each other black

nwando - Polygamy is evil and cruel to women especially the first wife
There is no woman begging her husband to go out and bring in bed mates.
If there are they need to see shrinks.
Even the women of the "great religion" are fighting against it
People do so out of lust,a wandering eye and a need to fulfill their urge to cheat on the legitimate wife.
and as usual it's the male that justifies this sleeping with 4,called marriage

nwando,

as you are a woman, pls help us understand some of your fellow women agree to become 2nd, 3rd and 4th wives?

ekene dili chukwu and alex ekwueme are two prominent igbo polygamists - ekene had 3 and alex has 2.

why did your fellow women who are their junior wives accept to become their 2nd or 3rd wife? did they not know that these men are poygamist before marrying them?

we all know that in olden days, women are given by their parents into polygamous marriages. even today, this is happening in the m u s l i m north. but what about the south?

who is forcing southern women to marry polygamists? yet there are so many igbo and yoruba ladies who are junior wives

it takes two to tango

as you are condemning men who are polygamists, you must also condemn your fellow women who agreed to become 2nd and 3rd wives

@ D-RELOADED re sperm bank donors,

actually at private sperm banks, you can give your specs [age, race, education, social profile etc] and they'll make a match. will cost you more obviously

also, sperm banks attached to university hospitals often hire students to donate sperm. used to be $50 per session in boston

@ moneybag,

Your perspective, with all due respect, would apply primarily to a relationship or marriage based on or at least initially inspired by romantic love.

But what about men married to women with an ingrained instrumental approach to sex and relationships? We have many such among Nigerian women especially my sisters from east of the Niger.

How does one meet the 'needs' of such women?

Hope you don't mind another question - how would you advise a man who naturally has a much higher libido than his wife? What to do?

Folks, I hope these posts above will give you some idea what went down. Once again, I am NOT supporting Ben or Rose. I don't know them in person to know who did what to whom. Even if Rose was sleeping around, I don't support Ben batterng her or enslaving here. The sole purpose of my posting the above is provide a broader picture from all sides of the story including the Dr. Okechuku accused of being Rose's lover. BTW, Okechuku eventually won the election.

This is a very long and complicated story with so many angles to it. There were thousands of emails on this subject. I've posted just a few.

----- Forwarded message ----------
From: Nneka Okoro <nokoro66@yahoo.com>
Date: Oct 3, 2007 2:57 AM
Subject: [IGBO_FORUM] Rose Nnawuihe is not the only woman
To: igbo_forum@yahoogroups.com


my sister Mrs. Ibenaso,

Please pray for orlu people. Their sins are plenty.

You are unfairly harsh on Rose Nnawuihe. Don't get me wrong as a mother she is suppose to be there for her children. She is not the only woman wrecking the family of Mrs Vivian Okechukwu. Many orlu married women are sleeping with okechukwu. Mr. Nnawuihe brought his own to public. Vivian told a friend that she hated Meg Duru who her husband paid about $10,000 to decorate their home. During the time of decoration Meg Duru and Okechukwu was staying alone in the house and knowing her husband history she disliked the lady. Meg Duru is a nurse and not interior designer or decorator. There are other women going after okechukwu money. It is greed. Don't blame Okechukwu. When they take money from him they have to pay. Their husbands are owing Okechukwu too. There are women like Theresa Duru, Ifeyinwa Iwunze, Emeka iwunze's wife, Chinyere Iwunze, ifeanyi Iwunze's wife and others they are working for many home health companies and defrauding the government. What is happening in Orlu today is going to affect many innocent people. Theresa Duru, Ifeyinwa Iwunze, Emeka iwunze's wife, Chinyere Iwunze, Ifeanyi Iwunze's wife working for home health companies will put those home health companies in danger because their habit of fraud and filing false reports will come to the public to see. Investigations will come behind.
Is it not fair for you to bring out all the mess instead of hammering on Rose nnawuihe? Don't you think that the government will also come after them very soon. Am I saying orlu men and women are promiscuous. Theresa duru is divoced. It is bad for married women to go for married man. Don't blame okechukwu only. Vivian Okechukwu preacher's daughter disliked most orlu women as she disliked divoce.

The elders and chiefs cannot say anything because they are owing okechukwu money. They can't condemn okechukwu behavior. Even they do the thing okechukwu is doing. Emeka Iwunze even was one the people who chased Chika Ihegboro out of her matrimonial home. Today chika ihegboro is divoce fron Godwin ihegboro.
This orlu people are going crazy. They will not until they finish themselves. Prayers can only save this people. They must clean up their house. Felicia Mbanaja-Hadjesmaili I will contact you.

Ndewu nu.
Mrs Nneka Okoro




Ifeoma Ibenaso <ifeoma.ibenaso@ yahoo.com> wrote:

ROSE NNAWUIHE YOU ARE A DISGRACE TO MOTHERHOOD

BIKO, NDI DIM NA UMU NNEM,

EKELE DIRI UNU NILE .

ROSE NNAWUIHE IS CONTITUTING A MENACE AND DISGRACE TO IGBO WOMEN AND DR. OKECHUKWU SHOULD STOP USING HER. ROSE NNAWUIHE LEAVE OKECHUKWU AND RETURN TO YOUR FAMILY. OKECHUKWU LEAVE ROSE NNAWUIHE AND CONCENTRATE ON VIVIAN AND YOUR CHILDREN.

I AM A FRIEND WITH VIVIAN OKECHUKWU. WITHOUT REVEALING THE PRIVATE DISCUSSION I HAVE HAD WITH HER, SHE IS A VICTIM TOO JUST LIKE MR. BEN NNAWUIHE AND OTHER PEOPLE. HER CHILDREN ARE VICTIMS TOO. YOU DO NOT KNOW ABOUT SERIES OF FIGHTS THAT GO ON IN THAT HOUSE. IT IS A FACT THAT HER HUSBAND'S INFIDELITY IS AFFECTING HER AND THE CHILDREN. THERE IS A PASTOR THAT IS PRAYING WITH US TO SAVE OKECHUKU FROM THESE LADIES. MRS VIVIAN OKECHUKWU IS DYING IN SILENCE AND FEAR. WE SHOULD PRAY FOR THAT FAMILY.

I AM ASHAMED TO SAY THIS IN THIS EMAIL. I DO NOT KNOW IF I SHOULD SAY IT. LET ME SAY IT VERY LOUD THAT ROSE NNAWUIHE IS A KNOWN PROSTITUTE IN DALLAS AREA. OUR IGBO CULTURE FROWNS AT HER BEHAVIOUR.

ROSE NNAWUIHE GOT FIRED IN HER JANITORIAL JOB FOR HAVING SEX IN THE PARKING LOT. THE NEWS IS AROUND DALLAS .

ROSE NNAWUIHE YOU ABANDONED YOUR FAMILY AND CHILDREN. YOUR DAUGHTER MAY NOW BE SUICIDAL BECAUSE OF YOUR BEHAVIOUR AND YOU DO NOT CARE BECAUSE OF MEN.

I WONDER WHY PEOPLE HAVE NOT CALLED THE CPS TO INTERVIEW THOSE CHILDREN ESPECIALLY THE ONLY DAUGHTER YOU ARE LIVING WITH.

YOUR HUSBAND IS RAISING YOUR TWO DAUGHTERS WITHOUT A MOTHER. WHAT CAN OF MOTHER ARE YOU? DID YOUR OWN MOTHER ABANDONE YOU?

YOU SAID YOU DON'T HAVE ACCESS TO INTERNET AND YOU DON'T HAVE THE SKILLS TO WRITE YET YOU SAID IN YOUR RESPONSE TO ONE MR. TONEY THAT YOU HAVE READ EVERYTHING HE WROTE. YOU ARE DESTROYING YOURSELF AND YOU ARE A DISGRACE TO MOTHERHOOD. WHY DO YOU ALLOW MEN WHO WILL THROW YOU AWAY TOMORROW TO USE YOU? DO YOU KNOW THAT THESE MEN HAVE CRIMINAL RECORDS? DO YOU KNOW THAT THE LAWYER HAS A THEFT CRIMINAL RECORD? DO YOU KNOW WHAT OKECHUKWU IS GOING THROUGH AT THE PRESENT TIME? GET A LIFE AND LEAVE THEM FOR THEIR OWN VICES.

YOU ARE CALLING PEOPLE NAME WHILE YOUR CRIMINAL RECORD IN DALLAS COUNTY IS PATHETIC. YOU HAVE BEEN CHARGED WITH AND CONVICTED FOR ASSULTS. YOU HAVE BEEN SENT TO ANGER MANAGEMENT SCHOOL . YOU ARE STILL ON PROBATION.

ROSE NNAWUIHE YOUR THEFT, FRUAD, AND PROSTITUTION CHARGES WILL SOON BE AT YOUR DOOR STEPS AND YOU HAVE THE GUTS TO CASTIGATE DECENT FAMILIES THAT OPPOSE YOUR BAD ACTIONS.

YOU TOLD YOUR FRIEND THAT YOU DO NOT REPORT YOUR INCOME FROM THE MANY MANY HOMEHEALTH AGNCIES YOU HAVE WORKED FOR. YOU FILE A SEPARATE INCOME FOR MANY YEARS WHILE MARRIED AND NOT REPORTING THE WHOLE INCOME. THIS ACTION MAY NOW COME TO THE ATTENTION OF IRS.

ROSE NNAWUIHE IS WORKING WITH MANY MANY HOMEHEALTH AGENCIES OWNED BY NIGERIANS. THERE WAS A POLICE REPORT COMING FROM HER HOME THAT SHE IS FRAUDULENTLY DEFRAUDING THE GOVERNMENT THROUGH THE HOMEHEALTH AGENCIES. IF YOU OWN A HOMEHEALTH AGENCY AND ROSELINE CHINYERE NNAWUIHE IS VISITING ANY OF YOUR PATIENTS, YOU ARE AT YOUR OWN RISK. SHE TOLD HER FRIEND THAT SOMEONE REPORTED HER TO THE POLICE THAT SHE IS COMMITING FRAUD BY FILLING FALSE STATEMENTS AND SAME INFORMATION FOR ALL PATIENTS WHETHER SHE SAW THOSE PATIENTS OR NOT.

HOMEHEALTH AGENCY OWNERS THIS A FRAUD ALERT AND YOU SHOULD TAKE THIS SERIOUSLY. ACT IMMEDIATELY. YOU MAY BE INVOLVED.

I HAVE TWO DAUGHTERS AND THEY NEED ME. BOYS ARE VERY DIFFICULT TO RAISE IN THIS COUNTRY AND THEY NEED A MALE FIGURE IN THEIR LIFE, ESPECIALLY THEIR FATHER. NO MARRIAGE IS PERFECT, BUT YOU WORK TO KEEP IT HEALTHY. THIS IS MY ADVICE TO MARRIED WOMEN WHO WANT TO RESPECT THEMSELVES.

MY HUSBAND MARRIED ME BROUGHT ME TO AMERICA WITH ONLY HIGH SCHOOL CERTIFICATE. HE SUPPORTED ME THROUGH MY EDUCATION. I HAVE NOT ABANDONED HIM AND MY FAMILY NOW THAT IAM MAKING IT. I AM GRATEFUL TO HIM.

THANK YOU,

MRS. IFEOMA IBENASO, RN, MSC. BSC

---------- Forwarded message ----------
From: theodore okechuku <tokechuku@yahoo.com>
Date: Mon, Oct 1, 2007 at 7:00 AM
Subject: [IGBO_FORUM] Re: [ICANDFW_FORUM] Bne Nnawuihe responds to Purported "Roseline Nnawuihe tells her story"
To: ICANDFW_FORUM@yahoogroups.com, IGBO_FORUM@yahoogroups.com, oopadfw_forum@yahoogroups.com, oopa <oopa@yahoogroups.com>, old_orlu@yahoogroups.com, igboevents@yahoogroups.com

DEMAND TO RETRACT

Dear Mr. Benjamin Nnawuihe,

I have just read the most libelous piece of material which you posted all over the internet today with the deliberate intention to impugn my character and my person. In consideration of my leadership position in the society and my profession, in consideration that this is a figment of your imagination, I demand that you retract the entire information line by line. I also demand from you an immediate and unreserved letter of appology.
You have 24 hours to carry out this demand begining from 12:01am on 10/01/2007 until 12:01am on 10/02/2007.

Theodore E. Okechukwu, MD.

This is one of the emails from Ben. I will post some from Rose and Dr. Okechuku later -





in a message dated 9/29/2007 1:25:34 AM Central Daylight Time,


My dear brothers and sisters:



I was rather laughing going through the purported story of my estranged wife. Though it is not good to pray for situations like this but sometimes it is good for things to happen. I always wondered if it is possible even though I have seen several people go through this every day. When people told me to be careful with what I ate, how and where I slept at night and my movement in and around the house suggesting danger or badly body harm to me when were together, I will always laugh and respond that she wouldn’t go that far. But allowing herself to be used in this purported story by Dr. Theodore Emeka Okechuk(w)u and Emeka Godfrey Iwunze with the help and advice of Attorney Charles Uzoma Maduka made me to believe that I had endangered myself living with this woman under the same roof for over a year plus after the problems started because she could have been used for other purposes.



Ordinarily, no one would want to engage in a fight with a woman and wins so easily no matter what, not to talk about the mother of your children (if she wouldn’t also lie about that.) Personally, I would have left this matter alone but going through it once more, I am compelled to respond one or two of her false allegations. How and where do I start or end? Do I start by leveling same false allegations on her as she had just did to me? I don’t think so, rather I will try to dignify her and keep praying to God so that one day she would realize herself and come back to her normal senses because I feel Okechukwu has brainwashed her so much that she only thinks and does what Dr. Okechukwu tells her to do and not the kids or me.



It would have been more appropriate if she had put more thoughts to the story before publishing. This is not also a story of a woman seek for help or slavery but rather the story of a greedy wild woman running around town looking for greener pasture. Unfortunately some individuals are already taken advantage of it trying to buy sympathy and shut me up. Unfortunately, they are wrong and won’t succeed.



First, the allegation of murder leveled here is so grave that I must categorically deny it. I think the right words after reading the paragraph were shock, surprise and of no merit needless to talk about reading this from someone who supposedly has known me for more than eighteen years of marriage. The allegation is baseless, nonsense and unfounded. Neither my parents, my grand parents, nor any of my relations had ever been involved or associated with blood. I have never taken anyone’s life whether it is direct or indirect. As she pointed out, I am from Umuezukwe Awo-Omamma in Oru East Local Government Area of Imo State. I implore anyone wishing to know more to please verify.



Since becoming adult and to the best of my knowledge, no one had missed or died mysteriously in my village not to talk about me being involved. I have not been involved in any land dispute that resulted to death. I am not a violent person. I love people and humanity which is why I am involved in politics. I have done so much politically to help the community. Through this political process I have met a lot of people including Dr. Theodore Okechukwu unfortunately who destroyed my family and is totally out to further the destruction. I still cannot understand his motives. Trying to define or portray me as a murderer is unbelievable. Fortunately, they will not succeed. God is not asleep! I have regularly visited home every Christmas for the past twelve years and was in Nigeria twice in 2003. Please recall that here in Dallas, three to five persons had lost there lives due to infidelity, yet I have never at any time considered that as an option but to keep praying and asking God to change their hearts so we can raise our children together as husband and wife.



Secondly, she alleged abuse in our marriage and to that of the kids. I will also categorically deny that accusation. For sixteen years, our marriage was one of the ideal and admirable marriages in this community. I have never laid my hands on her before nor were police called in to our house until she started her love affairs with Dr. Okechukwu. The first police that visited our home was called by her girlfriend. She had falsely sent police from her home alleging that we were in a fight. Fortunately, when the police came, we were eating the food that she prepared with the kids. They told us that someone had called that we are fighting. The kids and I laughed at the officers. They were shocked to the response from our children. I told them to go after the person that made the call for false police report. Then my estranged wife told them that the incident happened in the morning when the kids were asleep. She did that just to validate and save her friend from trouble. After asking too many questions, they found out that she was lying. They cautioned and left. From there on it was police every now and then. Since I already knew what their game plans were, to get me arrested and or get me on an assault charge/record. Why would I fall for such trap. Her boyfriend, Dr. Okechukwu digs into my records every now and then both locally and nationally to find something on me in other to keep me quiet. Unfortunately for them, they couldn’t find anything after twenty four-years of living in the USA.



I have never abused any of my children. They all love me and I love them. We treat each other with respect. If I had treated them badly as she alleged, and with the advice of the police informing us about the rights we all have to call them any time no matter the reason, they would have capitalized on that. For over two years I was going through this trauma, I have the option of divorce or separation realizing the fact that there was no marriage in our relationship but I still did not divorce or separated do it because of the children. She abandoned the kids for four days while I was in Nigeria last December claiming that I went home without telling her. With the advice of Dr. Okechukwu who promised her heaven and earth including financial support, she moved out of the house while I was in Nigeria. She is so brainwashed by Okechukwu that I started to think if she is okay. She never thinks any thing positive about the kids nor do things for them needless to talk about me. We have five children. I have three living with me and two are staying with her. The three that are with me are happy and well taken care of.



“About two weeks later n December 2005, Dr. Okechukwu visited us with his wife and children in what ndi-igbo call ‘igba oriko’. They ate, drank, and spent the entire Sunday evening with us. Dr. Okechukwu used the opportunity to explain everything to my husband that nothing happened between us, and that it was just politics. Mr. Nnawuihe will not let the matter go.” >>> Rose Nnawuihe



Speaking of ‘igba oriko, I am a bona fide Igbo man. My understanding of the word 'Igba Oriko' is that there must be a commission of an unbecoming act. And they have never admitted to anything or having affairs. So what is the 'Oriko' for? Besides I never knew that Dr. Okechukwu was visiting us until all of a sudden he was at the door. I asked my estranged wife if she knew that they were coming, and she answered, no. I immediately told Dr. Okechukwu not to try such visit next time because I hate to be taken by surprise. Look at his wife’s face, it seemed like she does not know about the visit and the so-called ‘Igba Oriko’. However, the truth of the matter is that Dr. Okechukwu had told my estranged wife that they were coming but she kept it away from me and lied even when I asked her about it. She had earlier prepared ngwo-ngwo which she served while they were visiting and for the first time, she took drinks from the storage and chilled without my knowledge or help from the kids. Usually our kids refill the refrigerator when it is empty. While they were visiting, he never raised the issue nor did he tell me the purpose of their visit. We were there watching the game and after the game they left.



Let me clearly state this; she caused this problem for her self because of greed and selfishness which made her broke her marriage and enter into relationship or love affairs with Dr. Theodore Emeka Okechukwu, who is also married; a love affair that has gone so wild and far and no longer a secret in Dallas for nearly two and half years. All efforts to stop them by Mrs. Vivian Okechukwu (Dr. Okechukwu’s wife), myself and others failed. Chief Humphrey Agbor and Engr. Ike Agbor, who are Dr. Okechukwu’s brothers and fellow Otulu men here in Dallas went to him pleading for him to leave people’s wives alone. He refused. Please recall that Rose Nnawuihe is not the only woman Dr. Okechukwu is involved with but I am one of those fighting it because of the kids. He has four known women (mistresses) and six other part time lovers within our Orlu alone. Around Dallas, more than four others and one Anambra man whose wife is a Cameroonian is also fighting this criminal. Dr. Okechukwu was involved with the family that just perished here recently due to infidelity (wife dead, husband now serving forty years imprisonment and three kids all in foster home.) Too bad!



Let me not try to dwell on this so much however, I implore anyone wishing to know or see more of what I have as evidence to please call or visit with me. I know sometimes we hate to hear the truth. Same time, we hate to see people take laws into their hands. Now that I prefer to talk about it as a victim of Dr. Thoedore Okechukwu, people still don’t like to hear it. Some are even suggesting that I “take it off the table … it’s your personal problem … deal with it yourself”. Had it been I tried to handle this differently, same people would say; “oh, he’s wrong , if I had heard it… he should have brought it for us to do something.”



We have never thought about the fact that Dr. Thoedore Okechukwu is married. His wife is equally suffering in silent. For instance, my estranged wife was in a fight with Mrs. Okechukwu last December at her home where she went for a Christmas-eve party at the invitation of Dr. Okechukwu without Mrs. Okechukwu’s knowledge. Mrs. Vivian Okechukwu knew her husband is having affairs with Rose Nnawuihe. When Rose Nnawuihe came in, Mrs. Okechukwu immediately confronted her to leave and she refuse because Dr. Okechukwu had given her the impression that she is part of the family. Instead of leaving Mrs. Okechukwu’s home, she started fighting Mrs. Okechukwu in her own home. This was happening while I was in Nigeria. Additionally, Mrs. Okechukwu had confronted her on many occasions over the phone and even sent people to warn her to stay away from her husband. On December 16, 2006, at a birthday party Dr. Okechukwu had organized for one of his illegitimate children, Rose Nnawuihe danced close together (wholesale) with Dr. Okechukwu throughout the evening. Many people were calling for me to come and see things for myself because I was not there too and Mrs. Okechukwu was not there too. They have been seen at several different parties dancing and in hotels, restaurants, stripper club and bars.



We have not also thought about this man who is having sex with women without protection and the risk and danger involved in spreading diseases. One would want to ask me how do you know this; well, considering the fact that his bad life style had produced two to four babies, proved that no precautions were taken. Remember that all of these women are married and their husbands might not be aware of their wives activities, and neither would he be expected to use one at home thereby endangering his wife.

I have to take this opportunity to thank all the callers for your wonderful support and encouragement. This summarizes the world we all live in that a wife and mother of your five children would ever ally with political opponents in order to get cheap popularity and destroy the family. I am not a candidate in this election however the candidate, Dr. Theodore Okechukwu’s character, credibility and integrity must be defined. If not for anything, at least for us to be aware of the imminent danger of the criminal amongst us and whom we deal with. As a victim, I believe it is incumbent on me to remain focus in this cause of education to our community.



Thank you

Ben Nnawuihe
bnnawuihe@aol.com

First of all BEFORE the feminazis on nairaland pounce on me, I am not Ben Nnawuihe. I am not his lawyer or his advocate. I don't support wife battering or enslavement.

This story and the husband's version were posted on email lists of some Igbo organizations in the US. That's how the story got out as people began circulating the story of Rose and Ben to their friends for laughs. Those of us who are on the original email lists have a better perspective because we saw the origins of the story and the katakata that followed.

I am NOT supporting Ben. I don't know Ben and Rose. I don't live in Dallas.

But I do know that this story suddenly cropped up at a time when one Dr. Theodore Okechuku was contesting for presidency of an Igbo organization in Dallas. Ben Nnawuihe was one of his opponents. Ben circulated email alleging that Rose was having an affair with Dr. Okechuku and that she was one of his many mistresses. Wha we have been reading here is Rose's version of the story. I will post Ben so each and every one of you can judge for himself who is telling the truth.

I will shut up here. Again, I am NOT supporting Ben or Rose.

@desbosky,

Part of this debate is a fundamental difference between many/most men and some/many women.

Some women require a prior emotional connection before they can enjoy sex. They are high maintenance emotionally and need constant re-assurances and i-love-yous 24/7. For these women, no sex without romance.

Many/most men can do sex with or without out romance easily. In fact, most men don't absolutely need romance before sex.

Many/most men once Hot can shag -
1. an ugly woman
2. a woman that they ordinarily dislike or hate
3. a woman that they don't feel anything for either way

- once she makes p#$% available, na go on soun!

Some women place more emphasis on finance before sex or on finance before romance and then sex. In both cases, the dude gotta drop ego/owo/kudi before any action between the sheets. For women in the finance then sex category, this has to be upfront cash payment e.g. runs babes, aristo girls, club girls, sex workers. But for some other women in the finance then romance, then sex camp, the dude need not make any upfront cash payment but the guy has to be loaded to pay for the lifestyle that these women desire, give them cash as they want and buy them all their dream stuff BEFORE they can 'fall in love' with him. This type of woman needs financial security in marriage first and foremost but may still demand romance before any sex in order to deceive herself that she is not really a materialistic babe but a romantic at heart.

Most nairaland women are against polygamy. So who are all the women marrying already married men and becoming their 2nd, 3rd, 4th wives? Takes two to tango. In olden days, women were forced into polygamy. Nowadays in naija, women go into polygamy VOLUNTARILY for the money or because they are tired of waiting for Mr. Right and ready to share.

What about women who sleep with their best friend's husband and get preggie for him and he then marries her as 2nd wife?

What of the maid-of-honor who later has a baby for the bride's husband? Can any woman here pretend that she has never heard or seen such?

What of the ladies who were childhood friends and pals through hight school to uni etc and still one had a baby for the other's husband?

It takes two to tango. Some woman want polygamy as much as the men do or they are so desperate they are ready to tolerate being a co-wife. Stop blaming men alone. Some women too much accept accountability.

Also, we must define polygamy. Its not only when a man performs marriage ceremony for 2nd or 3rd wife that he is a polygamist. Many guys have only one legal wife but they have 2 or 3 women outside who have kids for them. They buy/rent/build house for the lady, give her food/housekeeping allowance, pocket money, pay her kids school fees etc - in short, they do everything with her that they do with the legal wife. The only thing is that they did not do legal or traditional ceremony with those other women. Are such men not also polygamists? But they have only one legal wife.

yep, another moneybagged female

Maybe this is why most women get the wrong end of the stick in a relationship.A lot of what moneybags writes strikes one as a means to an end. . . . .

Brilliant observation. Some of his comments are interesting but there is this strong instrumental undertone which resonates from moneybag's various comments. In short, the guy is simply too good to be true,

I really wonder how realistic all this daily emotional connection can be for a working couple with young kids. There's school runs, long daily commutes to work and back, many workplaces forbid personal phone/email except during lunch hour or coffee break etc.

How does a man who leaves home at 6am and get back home at 8pm all exhausted and stressed begin pleasing and submitting and connecting in anticipation of sex that night? What about couples who don't work 9-5 - their work shifts at 2-3 different jobs each might not even let them spend much more than an hour together in a working day?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/E-gold

a word is enough for the wise

Interesting! all the babes here are against polygamy. So who are all the women marrying already married women and becoming 2nd, 3rd, 4th wives? Takes two to tango. In olden days, women were forced into polygamy. Nowadays, women go into polygamy for the money or because they are tired of waiting for Mr. Right.

Also, we must define polygamy. Its not only when a man performs marriage ceremony for 2nd or 3rd wife that he is a polygamist. Many guys have only one legal wife but they have 2 or 3 women outside who have kids for them. They buy/rent/build house for the lady, give her food/housekeeping allowance, pocket money, pay her kids school fees etc - in short, they do everything with her that they do with the legal wife. The only thing is that they did not do legal or traditional ceremony with those other women. Are such men not also polygamists? But they have only one legal wife.