₦airaland Forum

Thanks boss

Praxis758:
Bravo to this written

One of the few best writeups I've ever read about love and romance.

Well detailed, painstakingly arranged, rightly/choicefuly worded.

This can help build a kingdom relationship in the midst of bankrupt affairs in our modern world.

A mother of two who pleaded anonymity has taken to social media to ask members of the public whether it was wrong to ask her husband to do the dishes.
According to her, her husband lost his business to scam and she has been the one catering for the family with the little she earns from her restaurant business.
She said: “Truly, My husband was the one who opened the restaurant for me, I cook very well and I still do my cooking by myself as I only direct my staffs on what to do.My husband lost his business to scam and since then it’s been me carrying the responsibilities, most of my staffs left because I could not pay them and at some point, all of them left and I had to do everything by myself.

“My husband is doing nothing yet, he just sits at home and maybe go pick the kids from school and all, so yesterday I had lots of customers in the shop, I was doing everything by myself, so as soon as my husband walked in, I asked him to help me rush to wash a few plates while I serve, and he looked at me in some strange way, I repeated myself and he slapped me in public, and walked out.

“I ignored the embarrassment and even most of my customers left, when I got home I noticed that he moved his things, I called his phone and he said he is in his friends place till he gets a job he will come home, that I should take care of the kids.

“He cut the call I tried to call and the next he blocked me.

“What did I do wrong, who is supposed to be upset? I just need to clear my conscience.”

1,Respect
Men are wired in a peculiar way, what do I mean by this? Every man wants to be treated with respect from his woman. For men, their ego is of utmost importance.

As such, the wise woman will treat her man with utmost respect.

How do I show respect? Some ladies ask, by deferring to him, in all things, by not criticizing him to anyone, by treating him like your man.

Why? Because in every man there is a king, and a boy, treat him like a king and he will treat you like a queen.

2 Love:
Every man wants his woman to love him. How? Give unconditional love. Show him affection. Be nice to him, especially when times are rough or he is feeling down.

Treat him with kindness always, not only when he buys you things or is nice to you. As human beings, we need love the most when we deserve it the least. So treat your man with the kindness you would extend to your baby, spouse, or dearest relative, come what may and he will show you the same.

Feed him with his love language, for some its acts of service, for others, words of affirmation, or touch. Whatever it is, find out what your man likes or wants.

3 Commitment:
Committing to a relationship is a big step for any man, so when you have a man who has made a commitment to you, either in marriage or relationship, pay him the same compliment.

No games, please. Be transparent in your commitment.

For some reasons, many ladies think it is okay to keep more than one man, but it is really not worth it.

4 Integrity:
Every man wants a woman he can trust. Not one who says one thing in the morning and another thing at night. But one who is so reliable. So ladies, no lies, no tricks.

Don’t be in Lagos and say you are in Abuja, the truth can never be hidden for long, and a lie will always be exposed. Also, honesty; which is an integral part of integrity builds trust and sustains a relationship
Industriousness:
An industrious woman is hardworking, whether in keeping the home or maintaining the equilibrium in the relationship, or her workplace.

There are ladies today who can’t cook, clean, wash or keep their environments clean.

Also, the reality of the financial situation in the country demands that women work, if not outside the home, but at least do something to supplement the family income.

The truth is that most guys today are not ready to commit themselves to women who don’t have a means of livelihood as they are seen as liabilities.

5 Homeliness:
Every man wants a woman who is homely, one that will make a house into a home.

No man wants a woman about town, one who goes everywhere, never remaining at home. There is an art to this, and it must be learned at all costs

Try asking open-ended questions as regularly as possible.
Communication is not just about talking about each other’s days and saying what you had to eat for lunch. It’s about being able to dig deep and get to know this person as well as you can. It’s not always easy to dig deep, especially for those who have never been comfortable talking about their feelings. And it’s not necessary to make every conversation a heart to heart.

There are ways to do this without pressuring your partner to spill their deepest secrets. For example, instead of asking yes or no questions like “Did you have a good day?” try asking more open-ended questions like, “How was your day?” Yes, they may respond with a brief non-answer (“good”, “fine”, “the same”), but asking open-ended questions gives them an opportunity to share more if they choose to. Keep in mind that not everyone opens up very easily. Be patient with your partner if they are not sharing all the time.

The more you get to know your partner. On a deeper level, the more open and honest you may be with each other. And honesty breeds trust, which are two very important pillars of a healthy relationship. Basically trust helps build good relationship.

Try to be sensitive to nonverbal cues
If your partner says “my day was fine” but their tone sounds irritated, upset, or angry, then there may be something else that they’re feeling but not yet ready to communicate. Communication is not just about the words we say but also how we say them. Our tone and our attitude give away a lot more than just the words coming out of our mouths. And it’s honestly a skill to be able to pick up on those nonverbal cues. Look at your partner’s facial expressions, their hands (are they trembling/fidgety?), their body language (Are they making eye contact? Are they crossing their arms?) and listen to their tone of voice. It may not be easy at first but with time you will understand them better and see obvious signs.

Resist trying to assume what they are thinking
Sometimes you can tell just by looking at someone what they may be feeling. It’s not always easy to do this and let’s face it: as much as we want to be mind readers, we aren’t and shouldn’t have to be. So, if you’re not sure what your partner is feeling, ask them.

If you’re the one holding things in and expecting your partner to read your mind, take a moment to appreciate the fact that your partner is making an effort by asking you what’s going on rather than ignoring the problem. Do your best to let them know how you’re feeling when you’re ready to open up about it. It’s not healthy to say you’re okay when you’re not and then get mad at your partner for not figuring it out. Be honest about how you feel to the best of your ability, and try to express it in a healthy way before it gets to the point where it blows up and someone says something they regret. Being direct is always better than being silent.

If your partner is the one who is guilty of being silent, try letting them know that it’s not really helpful for either of you when they’re not honest about how they feel. Of course, it’s awesome when we know each other so well that we can practically read each other’s’ thoughts and know exactly what to say in the right moments, but we’re human and we may make mistakes sometimes or miss signs that seem obvious to our partner or vice versa. It’s important that you both make an effort to better understand each other and be patient with each other, too.

Tell your partner what you need from them
Sometimes we may just want to vent and feel validated by having our partner support us. Other times, all we may require is advice. Like I said before, none of us are mind readers, so it’s important to try to keep your partner informed so that you’re on the same page. Saying something beforehand like, “I need to vent right now and I’m not looking for any advice, just your support,” or, “I really need your advice on this situation,” will let them know exactly what you need in that moment.

Being direct about what you need can alleviate some of the miscommunication or stress in a given situation, too. By letting them know ahead of time, we can maybe prevent those unnecessary disagreements brought on by a miscommunication.

Communication is a skill

Ultimately, communication is a skill, which means there’s always room for improvement. Work together with your partner to figure out how you can maintain healthy communication and stay on the same page. Be as honest, direct, kind, and thoughtful as you can. Whether it’s with a Bae Sesh, or simply making a bigger effort to open up to each other.

Ways to improve communication in your relationship

Ask how they are daily
Check in every day. Asking “How are you? How was your day?” will not only keep you in touch and in sync, it’ll help keep you in the habit of communicating with each other.

Never assume
It’s easy to get worked up in your own head about something, but never actually reach out to the other person. Assumptions and mind reading usually lead to misunderstandings and hurt feelings.

Communication isn’t just about talking; it’s about being an active listener. Who is an active listener? “[They] listen to what their partner says, rather than get defensive without understanding the partner’s point of view or where they’re coming from, so be patient and actually listen.

Have regular relationship check-ins
Just like you should ask how they are every day, you need to check in about the big stuff too. Make sure that you ask, “How do you feel about us?” and if there are any big changes — moving in, getting engaged, going on holiday— make sure you talk about them regularly. It gives you both an important platform to air concerns.

Believe things can exchange
Part of having positive conversation and communication is having a positive attitude. Don’t approach problems as though they’re impossible to solve.

Respond
If your partner is reaching out to you, be there to meet them. Couples try to ‘ get each others attention throughout the day, whether it’s for support, conversation, interest, play, affirmation, feeling connected or for affection,“Each of these moments is an opportunity to connect with your partner. A person should look for someone who responds to them, or at least acknowledges them when they try to get their attention, because it shows that they are meeting your emotional needs —or at least trying to.”

Whether it’s just talking about their day or trying to discuss big issues, recognize that they’re reaching out and meet them.

Talk things through before they happen
If you know you have a stressful time coming up, touch base beforehand.

Say “thank you” and always be grateful even for the little things
“A great way to build intimacy is expressing gratitude for something thoughtful your partner did that day,” it really is very simple. The words thank you and well done go a long way.

Discuss your sexual fantasies
Being able to talk about sex openly doesn’t just mean you’ll both be more satisfied. It shows a real connection.

Communicate during sex
You don’t need to be into dirty talk to communicate during sex. Giving verbal cues is great, but moaning, leading their hands, even just saying what feels good are all great ways to make sure that the communication is happening in all areas of your relationship — bedroom included.

Pick your timing
So often we bring something up when we’re feeling frustrated or annoyed. But pick your timing. Don’t bring up a big problem if there’s no time to discuss it properly. Don’t approach your partner with a bunch of small problems while the stressing about something big. You’ll know when it’s a good time.

Take the time to compliment and praise each other
If you get too comfortable with each other, it’s easy to only bring things up if they’re bothering you. You start to get complacent about the good things and take them for granted, which can breed resentment. Keep pointing out what you appreciate and love about each other.

It might feel as though communication is all about those big, deep conversations. In reality, it’s all about maintaining the little things. You may not get it all at once but keep trying. I wish you all the best.

Money can destroy families and friendships. It causes rivalry and even destroys relationships. Couples can have a lot going for them, but when it comes to money, problem arises. Maybe one person chooses not to open up to the other person their true financial status or is hiding debts or embarrassing habits related to finance from their partner.

Some go as far as ensuring there is no financial trace to all their dealings, like deleting alerts, both sms and email, avoiding any financial discussions, spending more than the other person or spending less to deceive the other that they don’t have. Even as far as having heavy investment or property without disclosure. There are many reasons for this. But it’s something that cannot stay hidden forever unfortunately. We have cases where people stayed in rented apartments not knowing the house actually belongs to their spouse. Or business men having huge balances and not letting their spouses know. Secret now comes out upon the death of the wealthy one.
Ideally, financial status should not matter when relationships are involved because what we are trying to preach here is financially transparency. A lot of people have bad experiences which have made them to stop. You may be madly in love with someone, but please have it in mind that when you get serious, you’re joining your financial statuses together, no matter how good or bad the status is. So you need to love with your eyes open and medulla oblongata intact.

So my question is why are you arguing with your spouse about money? You are definitely not alone. When you put together partners and money side by side, you will surely have days where how money is spent becomes an issue will let loose, arguments on how much to spend to buy food for the house and someone is requesting for a pair of shoes or Gucci hand bag or human hair costing the same with a plot of land. Do you know money is one of the major issues people in relationships fight about? It sometimes can lead to a serious breach in communication and if not handled well, end up in divorce.

Trying to merge your life and that of your spouse, especially in relation to money is not easy. It is a continuous work in progress as each individual has their own perspective. Here are a few mistakes couples make when it comes to their money and relationships and possible ways to avoid or handle them. The truth is talking about money with your partner is the key to handling the issues before they even come. Before settling down with anyone ask the necessary questions.

1, Cheating your partner and spending on the side man or side chick

Any type of affair, same sex or otherwise, can destroy a relationship. And when the wayward partner has been running up bills, no matter how small, it is with some side chick or side cock, side goat or whatever they are called these days, this will only worsen the issue.

If you decide after all the turbulence to stick to each other, that is if you are both patient and strong enough. You will need to get counselling or have a serious heart to heart talk with each other. This is not easy at all, but it can work, if you are committed. Nobody plans to cheat, sometimes it crawls up on you and overtakes you, which is why even in relationships one needs to be emotionally intelligent so you don’t get sucked into what will hurt your spouse, guard your heart and thoughts jealously.

From a financial aspect, the erring partner going forward needs to be transparent the person who betrayed their partner would have to be willing to make all financial transactions transparent, what this implies is that you will have to willingly inform you partner on all financial transactions and discuss on what you spend, thereby making you financially and emotionally accountable.

3, Hiding your debts

This, I am so sure, will not be news to you, while you may not be doing this, you will at least know one or two people doing this. Why? Because it is a common situation amongst friends, family and people in relationships. Hiding debt is not just keeping mum about the money, it also shows that there are fundamental issues of trust amongst couples who experience this.

It may be difficult to discuss this particular one, but you have to start it anyway. So the first step is to not judge, shout or make the person feel worse. Let your statements always have “we” so that they know you are interested in helping them sort it out, as long as she or she is not a chronic debtor, in that case immediate counsel is needed.

3, Giving money to either family member

This is another issue with trust. Sometimes family members come up with business ideas and ask you to get involved. Sometimes they come asking for money all the time and you keep giving, even at the detriment of your own needs and those of your spouse or immediate family needs. A toxic relationship can erupt here, as one spouse will be forced to take sides or quarrel with family because of money not being paid back. At the end of the day, it boils down to who you perceive to be right or wrong.

It is still possible to fix trust between two people, though a difficult thing to accomplish, as one may need to create boundaries. You will have to accompany your spouse as a team with one voice and tell them (family) how you feel and what they need to do to rectify the situation. This will clear the air and let family know that you have a unified front and destroy any doubts anyone has been experiencing or feeling. Also any misconception on repayment needs to be cleared and put in the open. You may not recover the loan, but at least will have been put in proper perspective and ensure it doesn’t happen again. I wish you all the best.

In relationships, not all will last forever because everyone has a different tolerance level. Some will be able to withstand the trials and tribulations while some will not be able to because generally, if they cannot, then the relationship will end. People break up for so many reasons, but the major reasons to take note of are sex, money and morals.

When two adults decide to come together and have a relationship, they tend to have different views and opinions on sex, money and morals because quite a number of may not be objective.

Therefore, a lot of subjectivity is applied. If couples cannot find common ground and are unbending in any one of these areas, it can deeply damage the entire relationship. Communication in any relationship as I always advise is key.

If this breaks down, then restoring health to the relationship will be hard. Many couples who are friends apart from being lovers are able to withstand these pressures. If friendship ends, then communication breaks down. Your partner must be your friend.

Couples who do not operate as friends start competing with each other which translates into envy and resentment because they no longer have a common ground.

1, Communication with each other

In every relationship, communication is the foundation. No matter how bad things are, if there is communication, you can overcome the challenges. When communication gets staggered, many parts of the relationship start to suffer. Arguments become frequent and some of the issues end up being unresolved. Thus creating a gap and both of you becoming strangers to each other in the end and if not resolved leads to a break-up.

2, Growing apart from each other

The constant thing in life is change. People must change and evolve. Someone you know today can change tomorrow; no one really stays the same. We have to keep exploring and rediscovering ourselves and trying out new things. There are times when you grow alone without your partner. It may be a small growth or a big growth. We grow and learn more about ourselves. It should be top priority of any relationship to grow with each other and not away from each other.

3, Trust between each other

Trust is a serious issue for couples when trust is low between each other. It can break the relationship. If any relationship keeps experiencing or has experienced cheating and other problems, it will reduce the trust and spoil things between them, making things fall apart.

It is even worse when one or both refuse to apologize or worse even admit their faults.



4, Inadequate love between each other

When only one person is making all the efforts to give love and is not receiving, this makes the relationship unhealthy. Relationship is all about “give and take.” It is not every day you will be in the mood to give love. That is when the other partner should step in.

But when you give today, give next year and nothing comes in return, then it becomes difficult to maintain the love and sustain it. At some point, one person will realize this love is no longer worth fighting for at all.

It is important for both partners to have a healthy level of self-esteem. If one person lacks this, it will definitely affect the relationship and things will turn sour because the person with less self-esteem will start doing negative things to gain their self-esteem back which in turn will affect the relationship in a bad way.

The goal of both partners is to understand each other. You both need to, from time to time, evaluate yourselves as a team and see if you are both heading in the same direction.

You both need to have maybe not exact thoughts, but see each other’s visions and support yourself in achieving them. Find a way where both of you can come to the middle and understand each other.

Take time to decide if you may change your perspective in the future. Then, discuss solutions with your partner and be willing to let go if compromising is unfeasible. The last thing you want to do to anyone you care about is string them along and cause more pain for yourself and for them. It ends up being loads of wasted time for both parties.
If you notice at some point that little things no longer excite you. In addition, that you prefer being away from your partner than being with your partner then it may be that you are due for a self-reevaluation. You have to be sure that you have not sacrificed your happiness for your relationship.

In relationships, there must be sacrifice and compromise, but not to the point of losing your own identity. Keeping the relationship afloat is the job of both parties and not one person alone. Find out if the relationship is the reason of your unhappiness or if there are other underlying issues.

There is no relationship made in heaven. Every good one you see entails hard work and constant moves to keep things spicy. The grass may look greener, but the fact remains that if you and your partner do not consciously and intentionally work on the issues, then break-up is imminent. I wish you all the best. GOODLUCK

Lol what a shameful death

God I doubt this pic is not from Nigeria[quote author=wwwihy post=101477345]Bus Stations in Lagos are better than this Airport Terminal... why is op creating multiple threads[/quote]

Thank God o useless woman

Make thunder fire u

Calitoscassius:
Don't mind that gullible cretin.

NwaAmaikpe:



I support the ban.
These pastors need to cut gays and lesbians some slack.
Homosexuality is not caused by an evil spirit and as long gays recognize Christ as their Lord and saviour, they won't be condemned.

What's there in accepting humans for who they are; must we shame and demonize them just because they are gay? It is very ungodly.
Christ in whom our Christianity is based on was very tolerant of unbelievers.

I love lesbians, in fact they are my favourite porn genre so the earlier we learn to love and accept these gays, the better for us because who knows? One day we may find out that one of our offsprings is gay and then we'd expect people to love them.

Which ada jesus are they talking about is she the one that sang ONLY YOU CAN DO WHAT NO Man cant do.

Yes o

Bornsinner7:
It would be better to be naked

I tell u bro I sleep naked but my neighbor always laugh at me but she is ignorant sha.

Muyiwaipere:
No 14 is why I don’t were boxers or underpants

I did sir I took her to sogo ice cream restaurant and is quite after we ate and done with discussion I wanted to show her my house because she wanted to travel tomorrow. I didn't expect such act from her.

Jodha:
Yes nah ... that's the kind of dates I prefer sef.. let's just stroll...and lick ice cream ...or fruit juice..we walk and talk...

Not going to some noisy place with loud music....

Thanks

Nazgul:
Your first date with a girl was in your house, and she was completely comfortable with meeting you in your house for the first time?

My brother don't worry yourself over her, let her go...such a girl will kill you before your time.

Thanks

chival:
If she left because of that, then it may be an indication that she is immature and materialistic, and therefore not worth the hassle. Move on.

I have been crying �� I invited my new girlfriend to where I leave she found out I don't have chair she left thinking I want to take advantage of her. I feel so bad I was planning to buy chair as soon as a get money. What should I do?

Big lie I have been mastibating for 7years it is a big sin repent o

House1411:
masturbating is not a sin.... other mamals engage in this form of act

Hi guys I want to seek your advice, I have a phone that is 5.5 inch and it use 1gb ram, you can imagine the frustration of 1gb ram phone. Then a friend sent me 50k. Should I buy a phone sold 36k with 6.0 inch and has 32gb storage with 2gb ram and keep 14k Or should I buy the one of 48k that has 6.6 inch with 2gb ram and 32gb storage and keep 2k. Please help me in this decision.

Hi guys I want to seek your advice, I have a phone that is 5.5 inch and it use 1gb ram, you can imagine the frustration of 1gb ram phone. Then a friend wants to sent me 50k. Should I buy a phone sold 36k with 6.0 inch and has 32gb storage with 2gb ram and keep 14k Or should I buy the one of 48k that has 6.6 inch with 2gb ram and 32gb storage and keep 2k. Please help me in this decision.

You are right he is not professional

majamajic:
Fuel was still intact

The pilot should have started dumping out fuel Immediately before returning back to the airport , from the result it shows he came back with all the takeoff fuel

Useless woman

I know this guy personal oo shame on him

Lol

alphaNomega:
It's very easy to spot a hidden camera in your room. All you need is your phone.

1. Turn off the light in your room to make everywhere as dark as possible.

2. Activate your phone camera (without flash) and point towards the area you suspect a hidden camera is sited

- you would see a red streak of light emanating from the hidden camera

3. Sue the hotel and make your millions

University market road

JOACHINpedro:
You wan die because of a girl
Where in Nsk you dy make I come drink palm wine with you jare

I just feel like dying now the girl I love so much in anambra we have dated for 3 years but of recently I notice that another guy might be sleeping with her since we are not close. I am in Nsukka, I have feeling that she is cheating how can she call me and told me she is going to plug her phone that I should not call till evening. I smell some lies maybe she is going to a guys house and don't want to see my call. What should I do

Including your mom and sisters nonsense

Jesus Christ guy you too much exactly you are right

LeHMaR:
Nollywood old movie, i can suprisingly remember the details, sam loco being their father with aki na pawpaw being the 2 brothers... Old times

i want to ask una question i need your opinion. You are in Europe hustling and your two brothers are at home in the village and the two are stubborn. You have stayed there for years then one day you sent them 20,000 dollars to give to dad and the two brothers went and print fake dollar and give to dad then use the money for business. The two one loves women and he can't stay without spending. And you trust one that you later sent him 190,000 pounds to keep for you and he snap house and sent to you telling you he build it. Later you sent him six jeeps and when you came back to settle down in Nigeria you found out the house he sent to you was another person's house and he has sold the jeeps. Then you confront him he threw you out of his house and even insult you telling you that you have no prove. You later found out that the dollars he gave to dad was fake. You confront him he got you arrested and later a friend bail you. What are you going to do to him after what he did to you?

Donald trump will forever remain the worst president in history of USA, he is always the worst president to be impeached twice on seat and he is also the worst president ever banned to participate in any political offices again, he also the worst president in USA to be banned on twitter because of his running mouth and threats. Shame on him