In saner climes, your brother should be in jail for harassment

Davido like wizkid Sha

julie90:
I have been working for this company for two years. In December 2021, there was a change in management, a new manager was assigned to my Department. Before the change in management, I applied for some jobs in November 2021 but I didn't get any response.

Things between my new manager and I developed really quickly (he is not married and he is 10 years older than me). Although we have been working together, when he became the new manager we started dating. it was mutual, it wasn't like he forced me. We liked each other and we started dating in March 2022. We kept things professional in the office. Nobody in the office knows about this even till now.

Those companies I applied to in November 2021 reached out to me for an interview. I got two offers at the same time. Both offers come with great pay (similar to what my boyfriend currently earns) and a significant boost to my career. I spoke to my boyfriend about it and being my boss he told me to reject both offers, he told me he would be able to cater for my needs that the only commitment he has now is paying for his house and once he is done paying for it, he would have more money to take care of me and I didn't need a job where they would pay me what he's currently earning and be in a role similar to his.

I told him it's not the money but it would be about moving up the ladder in my career. These are offers people do not have, now I have two, he is asking me to reject them. He told me even if I have to move the only offer I should take is the one close to the company where we work which has a lower pay compared to the second offer. I told him I would go with the second offer which has more opportunities for me. Both offers are in the same state although my preferred offer is a bit far from where I live but it is still a reasonable location to commute everyday. At one point he told me, I was too ambitious and I took it as a compliment.

I noticed he changed since then, he informed the company management that I was leaving and we began the handover process, I noticed he changed after we had the discussion about me accepting the second offer but I thought it was about him missing me. May 31 was my last day and I noticed few days to my last day he was acting strange so I asked him what the matter was. He said he doesn't feel anything for me and we should stop seeing each other.

This is a man that was really excited when we were dating, all of a sudden doesn't feel anything for me because I got a high paying job? Is it wrong for a woman to be ambitious? When has it become a crime for a woman to aim high in her career? My role will still be to support him. I have never been rude to him and I am not going to be rude to him because we now earn the same salary. I really like him and I feel disappointed that he could act this way.

Is it now a crime for a woman to be ambitious?

He doesn’t want someone who is ambitious. There is nothing wrong with that. He is just not for you. Move on, the right man that can handle your success will come and encourage you to move higher.

Lifted07:
Your wife didn't accuse you of sleeping with your brother's wife, rather he accused your brother's wife of sleeping with you. Only you can tell if you presented it this way to transfer the blame, or your wife is indeed a troublemaker and she's a kind of person who doesn't take responsibility.

Maybe he actually did sleep with his brother’s wife and the brother just got to find out.

Augustwife:
On several occasions I have asked maybe it's something I am doing wrong or not doing at all but he keeps saying it's not me it is him. God knows I have tried my best to be a good partner/wife. I have no other excuse to leave aside from his addiction. Won't it be that I am leaving him because of a problem.
For the first time in 5 years I spoke to my mom about this(I didn't want any member of my family to know so they won't loose respect for him as I was really hopeful he would change), But i can't talk to her about it again, she would only ask me to pray that's why I am here on nairaland. I just want to hear other people's opinion and make the best decision especially for my children

Good morning Mrs August. From what you have said so far, I do not think your “marriage” has a problem. Rather your husband does, addiction. Addiction to alcohol is a very difficult thing to fight, it is not easy for anyone to fight any addiction. A lot of people spend years trying to get rid of alcohol addiction but it’s largely unsuccessful. You can decide to leave him because of his addiction problems, but the essence of marriage is to stick to your partner especially in times like this. Addiction is an illness and should be treated as such, he can’t control himself, he doesn’t drink because he “wants” to. He drinks because he must and if he doesn’t his body system goes haywire.


What you need is a solution to his problem and the ones you have tried so far has been unproductive. I advise both of you do an extensive research on alcohol addiction and best methods to fight it. Meet professional psychological doctors, try home therapy too. So many times he will try and fail, you are his support system and should be there to cheer him on to win the fight. He also needs to belong to a group or community of people trying to fight alcohol addiction, if you can find one. Overseas, they have what is called AA meetings for those addicted to alcohol and trying to fight it. If he can find something like that here it will help a lot, so he can know he is not alone in the fight.

People make mistakes and get addicted to substances that ruin their lives. You’re his last hope, leaving him right now will only make things worse and make it more difficult for him to break his addiction.


Like I said, addiction isn’t easy to fight, you may not understand him because you are not in his shoes. But right now, if he is willing to stop, he needs love, support and care. He won’t get it right on the first try, or even the 10th one, but you guys have to keep trying together till he is able to overcome it.

And yes one more tip, it’s difficult or stop addiction at once. It has to be gradual. Try first by reducing his alcohol intake little by little. If he takes 10 bottles a day, start by making it 9 per day.

thesicilian:
You call him a kid meaning you're the matured one yet you go ahead and do exactly what you're criticising him for: public clapback.
What does it take to give Rema a call before or after the release?

Chai be like make I buy you wine but sapa de. Nice comment

Solofresh2:
Hello Nairaland Christians, have you for once wondered why you christains worship on Sundays and not the Sabbath day.

If you study your Bible well, you will realize that when GOD was done with his creations,he rested on the Seventh day and blessed it saying we should keep it holy.

Now, looking at the days of the week, the seventh day of the week is Saturday and not Sunday.Sunday is the first day of a new week.
So,why do we worship on Sundays and not the seventh day of the week?
Are we really following God's commandments at all or we are just deceiving ourselves?

The apostles after the death and resurrection of Jesus used to meet on the first day of the week, untill they were identified as Christians. So hence the tradition carried on. The apostles couldn’t meet on the sabbath day as it was a strict offense even in those days.

Leverage2021:
will you shut your dirty mouth

North that has been suffering from Islamic Terrorists orchestrated by Islam and teaching from mosques since 2006 how many times have sultan organized summit there

Your Terrorist sheiks rather organize summit for boosting bandits

So according to your logic, since the north is in disarray
And unsafe, the east can also follow suit? Is this a defense? If Boko haram is in the north, does that mean the east can then be unsafe as well?

I would really appreciate your response

EkehPraise:
My elder brother came to for a training in the city I live and will be staying at my place. After he changed into his boxers and came to the parlor my eyes moved to his waist and guess what I saw? Waistbeads of different colors and designs. He is a tech guy, never used to wear one even in his school days, I asked him what's up and he just laughed and said he likes them
As a man I have seen a lot of ladies adorn their waistlines with lovely waistbeads and I love it but seeing it on the waist of my elder brother almost made me go nuts with confusion
How can a full grown man be wearing
waistbeads and feeling really cool with it??

What could it mean?? He is not married, the last time we had an idea that he was in a relationship was about 4 years ago and they had long broken up.

I am thinking of calling my dad to tell him about it.

Please don't tell me to mind my business, he's our first son and the eldest and I think I should be concerned.

Mind your business and ignore. He will come out of the closet when he is ready to.

This one just wants to keep making money from arresting marijuana dealers lol.

D

Nigerians are so brain dead, it’s painful to see.

DropsMic:


Farming is

Hunting is.

Street Unfriendly, Wetin men eye don see no be child’s play

Happinessjosh:
What type of house can it build?

Is it advisable to go for it?

Edited

There is land available

In a small town in Delta

The soil is strong.

a.

H

This album probably going to get a Grammy nomination this year.

If you’re my friend and you’re dating my sister, it better ends in marriage because if you break her heart, it’s probably going to be the end of our friendship. My sister is my family, so if you’re going to be with her and I know you personally, you better come correct.

Kelvin125:
were you driving one of them yourself or you gave out the two on hire purchase?

I gave it out, I think it’s best if you drive it your self.

Please don’t buy it. Bought 2 last year, money down the drain today.

He is right. He simply doesn’t accept a renewal of contract from you.

Hoodlums

Abi the brother follow get Bipolar disorder? Just de talk anyhow.

If you want talk wetin happen talk am, if not keep quiet abeg make we rest.

alushkimo:
It appears you do not have an idea of how audit firms work and the ethical principles guiding their operations.

Lol. Okay.

H

Another avenue to siphon funds lol, 2.5 billion ke, only God knows how much was paid so they can be chosen as one of the 12 auditors.


Nothing will come out of this, the 2.5 billion would be pocketed and spent, the auditors will get their share, a few non complying directors will be indicted and we’ll move on with life.


This is so sad, another 2.5 billion about to be shared �

MrBrownJay1:
what you attract with HONEY, you will equally lose with HONEY. any man that thinks that money is relevant to a woman's loyalty, is indeed a dreamer. women attracted to you because of the money you spend on them, are only loyal to MONEY!

any smart man knows that A) there will always be a man with more money than you out there and B) you cant turn a HOE into a respectable housewife. some women out there are hoes and should be treated as such. the minute you believe that money can turn a bad woman into a good one, thats when you have lost the game. a woman who values a man for his money is a BAD WOMAN

Hahaha nice. If she belongs to the streets, then to the streets she must return. Never love a hoe, only Bleep a hoe.

Nairaland has a lot of kids. Smh

I think it’s best to watch porn hub then.

junior20202020:
The erection is very weak, it cannot penetrate

Erectile dysfunction is quite normal. And it’s nothing to be ashamed of. Your issue is psychological, since it happened the first time, it will keep happening again till you face it. Find a girl who loves you, explain this to her and both of you should patiently work on it. It’s not really a big deal, unless you make it one.