₦airaland Forum

babygirlfl:
After getting two then three Mother's Day flower, my mind just told me you will be having twins or triplets.

you're not the first to say that.

If that happens, all of you that wished it will take turns to come babysit.
Or I package the pikins and send them to yous one by one on a rotating holiday.

Awwww.


He's already on his way to becoming a fine gentleman

Can't you make beans and corn porridge with scent leaf from it?

One of My favorite things to eat.


Now I'm thinking some thoughts. Hmm .

tchidi:
Umuibe, good morning o!!
Abeg, I asked my Mum to bring me corn to grind for 'nri oka', mehn, she carried a quarter bag of corn that's not well dried/slightly fresh. Now, as I de wait am make e dry, e get wetin I fit use the slightly dried corn to do? Can I make 'moimoi oka' with it?

Sinbad2:
There's need to deny the death of Ooni cos the announcement of king's death especially that of Ooni follow due process backed with necessary sacrifices.Is not an ordinary king(man)

Hmm. Ok.

As long those sacrifices didn't involve human beings sha. (Heard some rumors like that)

Culture is a nice and wonderful thing. Warms the heart and add color and flair to very simple things.
It's only ugly when it begins to hurt people.

Hopefully this isn't one those kinds of cultural practices.

If it is, the earlier the people of that region began speaking against it, the better for their future generations.

Kimoni:
Chilli, what's going on? This is more than co-incidence naa. In my lifetime, I haven't seen one and this is ur third in just how many days

The Hen that laid those eggs was high on oestrogen

The govt should do something about this.
A nation with this much youth unemployment is not safe at all.
More miscreants available for dirty jobs.

I thought they said he's not dead.

Chillis:
Jesus look what I found again.

That's it. No more eggs. I give up.

All the people who want twins.
There you go. Carry go.

E bi like say it's talking to someone here .

Morning all

Chilli chilli.

It must not be twins o. It could be two big things waiting to happen at once. Hahaha. Fear dey catch you?

Busuyib:
sure

congrats.

SAMBARRY:
You're trying to face ya front, ?

It seems you don't really understand exactly what I'm talking about. There are cases where face your front doesn't work verbatim.
So this girl I've known before she even met the guy. I met the dude through her and my DH met him through me. They were even engaged to marry so it was that serious.

I do face my front about the intimate details of what's going on between them but on the social level it is still awkward to hang out around them since we all used to be together.
What I now do is if the girl wants to spend the weekend with us, I've to make the sure the dude doesn't want to spend the weekend with DH. You know trying to work around them so that they don't clash in my house. It's super awkward. And so many things one used to talk about that you can't do anymore because it will lead to discussions about the other person. And that other person might be around the next day. That kind of thing. So we skirt around issues, not feeling free anymore. Awkward.

I know the solution is the dissolution of one of those friendships. Mine with hers or DH with her fiancé's. It's not easy to be friends with two people who used to be intimate but don't talk anymore.

If we didn't regard their visa as gold, they wouldn't treat us that way.
Our people will do anything to travel abroad so don't blame them when they make shakara in giving their visas. The bad thing is the actions of the many who go to extreme lengths or leave the country and also engage in illegal activities wheike there are affecting the few good ones who are traveling for great reasons like that doctor up there.

She's cute

Why so many names? Will you remember all of them?

MarvellousGod:
First few pages of this thread mehn

Babyosisi is one crazy woman ..


Nice thread. .

seriously

@tearoses, sambarry.
I'm trying.

Odinma my sister.

Jisike my dear.

moca:
Nne,kedu ka I mere?
A ma m na everything na a ga nke oma?

(nne, I dey see double these days o. These smallie r encroaching on my time seriously. One just dey dia dey look me. Sleep he no wan sleep. No strength for shouting again. D other just started sleeping. Give him 30 minutes and he will wake up demanding to be fed
D worst be say, hubby is far far away. My househelp has gone to his rm to sleep since.
I need my mum. )


At topic,pls be neutral. Blame it on preggie hormone.

innervoice:
Well, your opinion is very subjective, isn't it? How do you know that they are not able to love and to bond with several people?



You were probably not thinking much, just eating coco candy?

That's entirely subject for a different debate. Are polygamous families as bonded as nuclear ones? Long arduous debate.

I was making coconut candy when I was creating this account. Figures.

moca:
Was enjoying ur debate on religion.

U will make a good lawyer

mama bomboy

Ladies how do you handle a situation where your friend breaks up with her man who happens to be your man's friend?

This is all shades of awkward for me right now because I can't have him come over my place with his new girl (as he did once) while my babe may come around. I knew her before him so I'm girlcodes on her side.

But can't ask hubby to sacrifice his friendship with the dude just so I can preserve mine with my friend.
One selfish person would have to win here and I want it to be me.

Hmm
This is doesn't sound easy. Well done jare.

naijababe:
@ Damiso, see organisation

For me I do similar tasks together for efficiency. I tend to cook, clean dishes as I go and do my laundry together as my utility room is next door to my kitchen. My hubby travels a lot these day so I just get with the program but when he is in town, he'd keep me company in the kitchen and I would talk about my day and the likes.

Just like Dami, kids go to bed at 8pm, it in non negotiable even if all kinds of drama starts at that time; some people like to bath their children at night but I don't so I wake up early, exercise, meditate and get my clothes together. I wear a lot of slacks to work, saves me ironing and my children have 5 uniforms each, I do not want to worry about lack of clean shirts and what not. Rather than use lists, I set reminders on my phone for things I need to do at the to I'd like to them.
I prep most food, i use as many short-cut as I can especially when it comes to kids meals, I boil my meat at one go and keep the stock in small sandwich bags, blend peppers, blanch vegetables and store the same way. There is nothing I need to cook that will not be done in 15 mins. My children like/prefer chicken, I buy the soft ones from the supermarket and cook in the oven and store the same way I store meat. Yams are sliced and stored the same way. Anytime, I need to cook I done in less than 20 minutes. I buy ready made meatballs and liguine pasta instead of spaghetti since it cooks al-dente in 10mins and pasta sauces are my life saver. I never ever run out pasta sauces, I ought to buy shares at Sacla

At work, I have a to do list and my list is often in the order of importance/urgency and that works fine. I very rarely clean, I ain't getting no medal for cleaning, so I hire people to do that for me once a week and I just touch up until the cleaners have to come back. My kids have been taught to clean up after themselves, even my 5yr old knows he has to get the dust pan to sweep his crumbs from the floor and wipe the table after he eats.

No body except daddy and I eat away from the dinning table, I have no time to start picking up crumbs around the house o jare, hubby and I are flexible, we talk whenever and whereever

innervoice:
Good for you but it does not change the fact that some men consider themselves capable of bonding with several females and I dare say that the number of those men outweighs the number of like-minded women.

Well what they consider themselves capable of and what they are actually capable of are two very different things aren't they?

Some women probably also think they can but they don't. Maybe we make better choices because we've been unofficially mandated to be the family keepers.

BTW I like your username "innervoice"
Na these kind names I dey hear I begin to wonder what I was thinking when I chose something else.

Abi I was high on food aroma or something.

innervoice:
Bottom line is that you would choose monogamy over polygamy, am I right?

Of course.

That's always been my stand since ages past.

innervoice:
Why is monogamy more sensible when you can get more out of polygamy as you say? Are you not contradicting yourself?

You're getting more, at more stress, less peace and sacrificing a bonded family unit.

I believe in bonded families. Real love and soul mates.

While not impossible to get in a polygamous unit, it is rarer.

So why risk it, if all that advantage that comes with polygamy won't be worth it in the long run?

innervoice:
Where is Cococandy?

actually, I would.
If for nothing but for the sheer novelty of experiencing it.

monogamy is just more sensible.
Remove sense and give way to whims and caprices, the more men, the multiple ratio of what only one man can offer in marriage.

I'm going to bookmark this. Thanks.

You can't believe finding a dress to wear can totally throw my day.

My hubby is the exact opposite.
He even has to remember my passwords and things planned out for me.
I'm that disorganized sometimes. (Covers face)

If it's not about book/school, it just floats around without registering in my mind. Smh

damiso:
You are like me so when you are like that you need to write lists.This could be done electronically or by writing them down physically. I tend to write though so I can cross out/tick off. I can't even go grocery shopping without a list because if I don't I end up coming out with what I did not intend to buy and not buying what I went in to buy.

Even at work my manager knows I always have post it notes you will always see weird things like ' chase finance re budget' in bright green all over my computer . I can't function without lists and it really works for me because I tend to get things done when I see them listed out in front of me.

It does make me a bit overly structured as sometimes curve balls occurs that mean I have to deviate from my lists (which I hate) but at least I am able to get the things I need to get done ,DONE.

Organisation is very key and for me having a routine or structure really helps. My children are in bed by 8pm at the latest during term time so that me and hubby can have time to to ourselves or just for me to to even catch a breather. I also have to plan ahead so for example I have planned all my outfits every week. This is because like I said I hate curve balls and my whole morning can be disorganised if I find that the shirt i thought I could wear is rumpled . My husband says I have issues but I lay out even up to my underwear.

I plan meals ahead as well(my husband being an adult deviates sometimes ) but the kids don't have a choice and that's why they prefer daddy sometimes cos jacket potato and tuna/sweet corn can change to MCdonalds .With mummy that's what you are having.

It helps me to also compartmentalise my thoughts into different caps.At work I am not mummy I am the professional that is paid to do what I am paid to do. As soon as I log out of my computer my mummy cap is on , as soon as the kids go to bed wife cap is on etc etc. it can't be helped sometimes but i try as much as I can not to use my children as an excuse and like others have said it helps that my husband sometimes picks up the childcare slack that does not allow me to always be the one rushing off from work. That said if asked for order of priority my family comes first and if it can't be helped I will definitely leave work to be with my family. I am a bit lucky that I have some sort of flexibility at work as well.

It's finding a rhythm that works for you and your family as it grows.families go through different phases and is just trying to find the rhythm that works for you at that particular time.

You can only say so much.
She's not a baby so let her live her life jare.
Before someone will start whispering in her ears that you want to stand in the way of god's blessings for her.

freecocoa:
According to her, he cheated a couple of times but apologised, yet still say that a man can't help it sometimes, therefore if such happens, the lady has to pray and do the usual red bra and pant thingy.

If he says "I want this thing this way" she can question but whatever he decides goes, regardless of what.

He did some things without consulting her, things she considered important.

Sometimes he took sides with his family when she was involved.

True. Some subtle changes are inevitable as I've seen my self changing in some aspects since I got married. Not even because he says so but because I've gotten used to doing somethings I never did before and eventually coming to like them.

bukatyne:
While I strongly believe that you will change subtly to the taste of your man especially in a marriage bound relationship, it does not erode your self-esteem neither does it make you live in fear.

The guy is trying to get her to withdraw from all her family and become mentally and emotionally dependent on him and she knows it that's why there is this doubt and she complains and quickly switches to defense mode when you are straying out of her comfort zone.

I would say Take her to a relaxed place and have What I call 'the talk'. Let her compare her previous self to Now and see If she wants for herself without mincing words.

At the end, only she can help herself.

P.S.: How are her parents' relationship like?

njokusboy:
What point again, what's so disprovable about the fact that a man can impregnate more than one woman simultaneously or that more than one woman can carry his child at the same time?
Women don't want it, I know... ya'll are comfortable with monogamy nd some won't even mind polygamy

you can't speak for women much less all women.

Pls dump his sorry ass first.

njokusboy:
Agreed...



Lol, I did find it amusing and wanted to point it out but I thought you'd misread it... it's actually funny, but saying I was happy you implied you were birthed by 2 men is quite unfair, I can't be dat evil.... stop ssuming things



The op did not prove that women can be polygamous, he only attempted to do so, reproduction is not dat simplistic.... nd I don't even have a problem with women polygamy... problem is, there are no/few men willing to partake, another problem is, women don't even want it...

That's the point. Why are some people always attempting to prove things without disprovable facts. The OP is only exposing the baselessness of such kinds of conclusions.

Na you sabi. Who told you women don't want it? Are you the one to tell us what we want or don't want?

bukatyne:
How?

If I have so many thing to do, making a mental note is so hard I tend to flip from one to another.
Since it's easy for me to multi-task, I tend to try to do all at once.

Sometimes it doesn't work.

all4naija:
This wiggle-wiggle debate is very senseless because I have seen anybody who can provide any experiment to validate their claims here. Bleh!

that's the point.

njokusboy:
A video of what
Would have preferred me to laugh at the implication of what you said?
Shey na bad thing to point out ur error? Calm down woman, am not a malicious person... stop assuming things

I mistook her post to mean just releasing two eggs which of course can be fertilized by one or two men depending on how many she met at the time while she was talking specifically about when it was fertilized by two men and the implication that makes you happy is that it means my mother must have slept with two men to birth me and my sis?

o boy I saw the glee that gave you. Malicious or not, that one made you happy. You were smileys all over. And 5min too.

Well even if she did, (for continuity's sake) how does that weaken the argument that women can also be polygamous?

I'm so disorganized

babygirlfl:
Like other ladies have said, marry a supportive and caring spouse and on your own you have to be prepared to :
1. work smart (e.g let other people help out in other things that they can do even if it means you have to pay)
2. be organised ( you will have to do a lot of planning especially planning ahead.
3.priorities what to do with your time ( know when to give home it's time and career it's time. Even around the home, you have to prioritise your house chores because trust me, sometimes you won't be able to do everything).
4. Know when to put your feet up and REST.