₦airaland Forum

Are you for real? Mtchew
He shouldn’t be annoyed for getting what up while he was innocent?

SIR0:
If the man is truly innocent, I see no reason why he should be annoyed or feel offended.


LOVE is worth much

You don’t have sense

KIDfurniture:
after receiving wonderful beating from strangers.. Some women are sick oh... Lately , some girls will just go out and scream he raped me oh. After both enjoyed the sex together . maybe cos the guy didn't give the girl what he promised.. She will turn the whole thing to RAPE oh.. Guys be careful .. Don't help any lady stranger oh... prison might be your next home o.

Additionally, you need mental healthcare. Is there someone you can talk to? Suicidal ideation isn’t something to be brushed under the carpet

Cutebabiesmum:
Yes ma but am planning to move out because I don't want to hurt myself again. This January I attempted suicide but thank God for our landlord son that came at that moment to ask for pressing iron and he rushed me to hospital. I believe if I continue with him, I can still try the suicide again and may not be lucky

Only you knows what you’re talking about right now.

victorian:
You are complaining?

I'm surprised.

I thought u were one of the numerous ladies online supporting Nigerian guys not spending on their gfs? And babes shouldn't expect a dime from men or else such babes should be called oloshos, even though they are in relationship with their men.

So why vex he's spending his hard earned cash on abroad babes?

As you ladies, dey forbid make guys spend on una. Nigerian guys who have the money will travel abroad and spend on women they feel like spending it on.

At least the strippers need money too.

Here’s one

Odoyo

desoul2004:
Madam, most of all these ladies who are giving you negative advises are suffering more than you in their own relationship. Life generally is not easy anywhere you go. Kindly pray for your marriage/husband, he might not even know the gravity of what he's doing.

Are you still in that marriage?

Cutebabiesmum:
It was already late before he agreed to let him come. He died 2 days after he came to my house in lagos

If it’s a Nigerian girl he would regard them as olosho but his money is good for US stripper. Low self esteem mofo

So he was truly cheating then. Pretending like he was a victim. Oniranu

Na Tonto fit him. Crazy meets crazier

For real?

Anyways my opinion still stands. If she’s getting remarried truly, she has a right to do so and have any type of wedding she likes.

holyeye1989:
People can carry fake news ooo....this is her son ..they took this picture during the sons birthday...I fear Nigerians ooo now I see that 50% news here is fake ..

What did she do wrong?

Y’all just hate to see a woman happy.

Would you guys be this pressed if the governor remarried after his wife died? Such misogyny.

CHUKWUMA1225:
This woman is pathetic.
Shameless and dick hungry.
Quiet marriage would have been more like it.
Showing off is despicable considering her late husband's memories.
Anyways what do I know.
She must have been fucking this young man since Hus Excellency had that aircrash.

Religion6:
How I wish all these people committing suicide cos of women will see what they are dying for. Women are opportunists not worth dying for.

Look at the fine bobo she even snagged.
After y’all will tell me men aren’t gold diggers

What’s the evidence and why is this a tribal issue? Ridiculous

If it’s not lock and key, it’s hardware and software. Y’all use meaningless analogies to avoid the discussion about being decent human beings. Nonsense

ericsmith:
Do you know there is no equality anywhere in the world , its either the system gives the women more power synonymous to overseas or men are allow to exercise there fundamental power.
There can never be two captain on a ship, even pilot onboard aint equals ... these has nothing to do with culture, mentality or been archaic its what life as bestowed upon us. you said:

"the African society focuses on training females more than males. They teach girls how to be good wives and mothers and they forget to train our boys" ALOL lemme correct that with my analogy
men are hardware while women are software lol!! do you know programmers & investors spend more time & money on creating softwares antivirus than the hardware itself ... you av a gadget than only get an update once a year but installed apps/softwares get updated almost every month
women are trained to be good wives just as those apps on your gadget are perfected with update regularly so as to be immune to the bugs & virus ..hence good softwares.
womens are draft becos man was lonely to be our companion preferably our partners .. shikena

Girl. tell me about it.

Mindfulness:
I know! And that's the problem! People are not taught how to communicate effectively. And this is the result. Two years later she still holds a grudge. I am sure it could have been worked out was she taught to explain herself and her MIL taught how to resolve conflict peacefully and politely.

If sex devalues a woman, it says something about men that what they touch goes down in value.
It’s not a good look.

BRETHA:
This is for the ladies who are looking to settle down.

When it comes to dating, the saying goes there’s no one way rule to go about it but I believe they’re ways to help yourself if things are not going to plan. But I really want to speak on something extremely important, something that has changed my life. When I entered the dating world, I would meet loads of guys. I was so focused on the external aspect of my life, my looks, my clothes my hair, my body and all these shallow things that had no substance. I thought these things will give me the man I wanted. I gave up my body freely to men within only months of dating, and I began to see a pattern. I was attracting the same kind of men and I was seeing the same results, men who would come in and out of my life and nothing else. I decided to make a change. This generation encourages casual sex, vanity and nonsensical things. There’s a reason why so many women are single in this generation, searching for husbands when some of the problems lie deep within yourself,something that men will never reveal to you.

Women please stop giving out your body so freely, it devalues and cheapens you. Stop having sex with a man within the first second third etc month. I 100 percent advise against pre marital sex but if you must, build a solid friendship based on trust and understanding before unraveling that side of you. A man might stay with you, he will love you, but he will never take you seriously if you share such an intimate side of you so quickly. Men are very smart when choosing a wife, a man of value is not going to marry a lady who doesn’t carry her body like a pure temple. If you are a virgin, please keep it and NEVER give it up to a man who is not your husband. Your husband will cherish you so much as virginity is one of the best gifts you can give to each other in marriage. If you are getting the same results from men, this is probably the number one reason why. They’re good men out there, you just need to value yourself more. Sex will not keep him no matter how good you think you are in bed.

I also need ladies to have more substance. Your fine sexy body with perfect makeup and wigs will not get you the desired man you dream of. Showing off your body might get you attention, but not the one you truly desire for a long lasting relationship. Sometimes you might see a couple, a very fine man with a plain looking woman, and then you ask yourself why? why her and not me, im beautiful yet no man takes me seriously, whyy?Darling, its because there’s something about the plain woman that makes her outstanding from the rest. She has internal substance which has longevity. Your inner beauty shines brighter than the one outside. Work on your character ladies. This is not to say you can go around looking unpresentable, but try not to fix your whole life on looks and shallow things which fade. Have substance, wisdom, a career, kindness, homely attributes, something tangible that can attract a man equal to your kind.

Use your youth wisely and Invest your time meaningful. Because once it’s gone, you’ll only have your self to blame. Do not allow the nasty things of this generation to waste your time.

Mindfulness:
I have been reading your comments lately and I love the clarity with which you explain your views.
No spirit of confusion, a beautiful expression coined by my sister Cococandy.

She said she needs virginity. I’m dead
Why didn’t I think of this before I took a husband. I would have demanded a virgin man

Mindfulness:
What had happened before they came? Did you clearly communicate why you would not show up to the gathering? If there was any misunderstanding then it had taken place before they came to your house that night. I do not want to excuse your MIL's behavior because it is not acceptable and she should have apologized but I have the feeling that she had felt disrespected in the first place.

You also say that you kept mute. I, for my part, hate it when people keep mute, especially in times of conflict. Communication is key! You either apologize or you stand up for yourself and explain/defend your position . Don't act like someone has cut out your tongue. It is annoying and it solves nothing.

What I am trying to say is that maybe, just maybe you and your MIL are about to disrupt a whole family because of a stupid misunderstanding. If you are sure that she is wicked, protect your children at all cost but if she only lacks manners/is too impulsive, consider whether the fight is worth all possible outcomes.

@bold, That could be seen as disrespect especially in a home with African heritage. You’re often expected to keep quiet and let the elder have their say.

At last paragraph, I agree.

@bold, that’s your opinion.

It works great for some and evidently defined gender roles don’t always work for all homes seeing the number of dysfunctional homes that abound who practice such.

You’re using OP’s topic to further your cause. Stop it.

Acidosis:
I guess I mistook the word equality for submission. While I believe in gender equality especially in the workplace, I do not believe in equal submission in marriage.

Men and women who deviate from conventional gender and family roles are bound to pay for their actions/inactions somehow, in some ways. OP's narration is a consequence of a longstanding deviation from conventional family roles.

So I'm not fostering any misogynistic agenda, rather I'm upholding family values and instilling same in those that care to listen. It is not about my purpose either, only here to proffer what I feel might help a current situation.

And yea, I would stay on the topic, it doesn't change how I feel.

Should have been addressed from the beginning since it happened earlier in the union. At this point a divorce does sound extreme. I don’t even think she was considering that now.

They should be together and MIL should be with her own husband.

Mindfulness:
Nothing justifies the comment. Having said that, my life experience tells me that there is much more to this story. I am not saying OP is lying but I guess she is limited to her own perspective. The question now is whether she should risk a divorce or how she can be more strategic in her approach. Her marriage seems to be ok except for her MIL so why throw the baby out with the bathwater?

Unless the OP is flat out lying about what the MIL said to her (in which case shame on you OP), I don’t know why folks want to hear from the other side to know that what’s wrong is wrong.

if I blow that your belly, highest is you'll loose the pregnancy and then take in again,nothing is going to happen"

What could justify that comment? Supposing that it’s true.

Honestly you should be giving this advice to yourself. Nothing warranted your comment about equality. Absolutely nothing.

Let me educate you. In a home where equality is practiced, both parties can call each other back to their senses when one is not acting right and the other will listen. This woman would be able to listen to her husband and vice versa. This one here is definitely not equality.

You have chosen to make up your own definition of equality in order to foster your misogynistic agenda. And I say ‘chosen to’ because I believe you’re capable of much higher intellectualism. You just chose not to because it doesn’t serve your purpose right now.

Stay on the topic please

Acidosis:
Knowing when to shut up and save your attacks is valuable wisdom. I have never seen you criticize or painstakingly address an issue with genuine and sincere intents. Your attacks are only for a singular purpose which is - put forward your feminist-centric views whether it solves a problem or not.

I don't know why I still like you this much sef.

Lack of jobs and productivity that’s why

Awesome

AjalaDtraveller:
I use a vegan version of this Banana bread recipe. For those of us allergic to Dairy products and eggs. It comes out nice and taste heavenly.
I skip the eggs, cow milk and chocolate chips. Instead I use either rice milk, coconut milk or any non cow milk. Then I use lots of bananas. Like 6 (already soft) medium sized bananas. I add small quantity of Sunflower oil into the mix, and after my dry and wet mixing is done I add dried raisens.
I have eaten the normal banana bread with the eggs etc and I felt no difference with my vegan own honestly.

of course. Equality is the problem. Very sane logic from you.
A woman who sounds like she’s off the hinge sometimes is your definition of equality because you have purposefully wholeheartedly CHOSEN to misunderstand what’s equality means. And you can’t be convinced otherwise because you need to say what will fit into your bias and misogyny.

A post with zero logic. Do better.

.

Acidosis:
When a man agrees to the equal submission nonsense in the home, sons and daughters from that home end up becoming "mama's boys and girls". To all those denying their husbands the "head-ship" authority, brace up for war with your daughter in-laws. You can't eat your cake and have it too.

Your father in-law is a weak man and the root cause of the problems you currently face. He's too weak to put his wife under authority. She's first a wife before becoming a MIL.She failed as a wife, of course, she's going to fail as a MIL too. She "conquered" her husband, of course, she'll always "conquer" her son too.

In so far as your husband remains the son to your MIL, there is absolutely nothing you can do. Your FIL is the ONLY solution to your problem.

Its joy by impregnating. The question is can he satisfy her? Two different things

Polchiz:
STOP your lies. The man's problem has nothing to do with age. A 75-year old man can impregnate even a 16-year old girl. The man is simply infertile.
I pity any young girl that will inform you that she is getting married. The marriage is over already because you will dish envy and jealous-infested advice.

Yea babe I saw that.

It was more of a rhetorical kinda.

Especially since it’s going to be easy for mischievous folks to pick on that part and try to use it against her

breakerofchains:
I typed in response to the part where she said "if I turn American on them ..."

Honestly there’s nothing inherently Americans about it. It’s just a common sense life devoid of cultural foolishness. If I live in anywhere else in the world , I’d like to think that such threats of grievous bodily harm will be taken seriously and that I can have a say in who comes to live in my own house. Why is it American?

breakerofchains:
If your MIL threatens you again, file a report in the police station, get a restraining order . She'll stop coming to the house.
One problem solved.

If your MIL is a breadwinner, why can’t she and her husband live by themselves?

You and your husband need to be together to grow your bond and she needs to be with her own family and let her son grow up.

what silly sickness, if I blow that your belly, highest is you'll loose the pregnancy and then take in again,nothing is going to happen

Shouldn’t be with someone who can’t defend you when such evil is said to you and it’s his and your child that you’re carrying.

The nerve of you! You’re an old cargo who doesn’t want a fellow old cargo. Dumbass.

I hope she spends all your money and has a baby for someone else. Control freak

GT07115:
well she is not naive as u think and to put the record straight I am the third guy she will be dating, I can count the number of ladies I have messed up with where, when and how it happened to this very moment , I am not a sex freak I was celibate for good 3 years without a woman no joke. When u talk about older ladies I laugh, older ladies who is either a graduate or self dependent I have come across are not submissive and ready to learn or take advice that will even better their lives, those who are graduate don't want to learn a trade to be self reliant rather they want to do business or secure a job they have no knowledge of. When I approached her I thought she was in her twenties but I was surprised to get the opposite and to me is a perfect age I love, I don't want old cargoes, I want a woman I can look at in 20 years from now I will still have an erection, sex is 80 percent in marriage and anything that will keep that fired burning to me is welcome and age is one of it. So don't take me for a sex starve man or an opportunist, I want her for a wife not sex machine, I am only disturb because humans are unpredictable and I don't have the financial muscles owing to other families responsibility.

It’s the woman’s fault.
Not the man who is trying to kill another human being. Your misogyny is ridiculously nauseating.

don4real18:
This is something majority of our women should learn from. Their love for money is so much that they don't care how their man makes money as long as they benefit from it. A man who sweats to make his money will not just spend it on you anyhow

Another day, another Nigerian man.

While their useless sons are all over NL fighting feminists they are busy in real life murdering other human beings in addition to a million violent acts.