BlindAngel: Good evening Nairalanders, few months ago I posted here regarding how my wife forced me into marriage that I wasn't in anyway ready for because she got pregnant. I posted about the regret I'm still battling until date, because the love isn't there from my own end and I'm also not in anyway attracted to her physically. I have told her severally that I want to option out of the marriage and not doing again but until date she has refused to let me go.
Back to the main point, my wife lost her dad this morning. Her deceased dad has two wife's and several concubines that gave birth to lots of children, my wife doesn't know some of her half brothers and sisters.
So I went to their family house this morning to console them. The eldest son of the family (her half brother) told me and another in law that we'd be the one to pay for mortuary expenses and casket, and when the burial is getting closer they'd give us a list of things to buy and we'd both bring one goats each.
To be brutally honest I wasn't mad because of this latest expense, I got furious immediately and right on the spot because of the pressure my wife pressured me into getting married to her, by now I'd have been totally free of these unnecessary expenses. More than 19 of her sisters, both biological and half sisters that has given birth, no single expense was listed for their man that they got pregnant for and has a child for. But I and the other in law that paid dowry are the one going through these unnecessary expenses.
So immediately he told me about everything, I charged at my wife right on the spot, right in front of her mom, her brothers, her sisters and some of her friends that came for condolence visit. I got so furious and started shouting at the top of my voice, I reminded her how she forced me into marriage that I'm not in anyway prepared and ready for, both physically, psychologically, emotionally, financially. (I have been reminding her regarding this almost on a daily basis and whenever we are quarreling.
I reminded her how she threatened me with suicide and our of fear of the unknown I wasted almost 4m in getting married to her. I told her that I'd have been free of these expenses if not for her pressure.
Immediately she burst into tears, and started crying endlessly.
Her mom and sisters started yelling at me and I yelled back at all of them. They told me I met her a Virgin and now she's no longer good for me (truly, the whole family thought that I was the one that took her virginity) My wife and I agreed to keep it a secret, but the constant remainder from her mom and sisters made me let the cat out of the bag, I told them that I didn't met her a Virgin that she has already started having sex when I met her, they didn't believe me but with my tone, I know they'd.
I also made mentioned that I'm not buying any goat or paying for mortuary or taking any list from them. That it's their dad and they should take care of every responsibilities, after all he has uncountable children, why putting some of the expense on me? I walked away, and switched off my phone until now that I'm just putting it on.
I know that I acted wrongly and allowed my anger to get the best part of me. But I was furious because no single bill went to her sister's baby father's, absolutely nothing was listed for them. I got furious because these expenses won't be on me right now if not for her pressuring me into marriage that I want ready for. I was furious because I and the other in law that they billed became the scape goat by doing the right thing by getting married and not leaving theirs daughter In ruins, where as those that got their daughter pregnant without getting married to them were totally free from these unnecessary bills. I'm in so much pains and regret right now.
NEVER EVER REGRET WHAT YOU DID.......That was the best thing you've done for yourself and the beginning of you taking practical steps to set yourself free from the bondage. I wish you the courage to see this through, weldone.
Good Morning / Afternoon / Sir, I am deeply humbled by your genuine concern towards me Sir, my gratitude knows no bounds. Sir, I have thought deeply about this and in all honesty I am yet to recover from the shock and surprise of this unprecedented kindness. As a father who have been on this journey long before, I will appreciate any help you deem fit to support not my wedding, but to a young son starting out life in marriage sir. I am sorry if this is disappointing to you sir, but the gesture alone has left me so emotional that I have been unable to collect my thoughts properly sir, but indeed I will appreciate the support.
Thank you sir and God Bless you.
Irijosa777: Greetings, I will make it short as possible. My marriage will be coming up next week. Day before yesterday my boss call me to his office and ask me what do I want him to do for me concerning my marriage. I was short of words, he asked me the second time what do I want from him. I felt humble, surprised and speechless at the same. He then asked me if I have bought my wedding suit I said "yes sir!" He then asked me again "so what do you want me to do for you?"
Since I could not speak he told me to go and think about it. I'm planning to meet him tomorrow.
One mind is telling me as ask much ( since he is very rich) but it will sound greedy. One mind is telling me to ask just as much as I need but then it will appear I wasted opportunity. He is a rare philanthropist, very nice and love blessing people. Working in his company is more than a privilege...
The truth is that there's no nothing my boss can't afford but I don't want to be greedy.
valETA1: I'm at a crossroad towards making a decision of either staying back or moving to PH.
I've jst been transferred, bt the truth is, where I'm currently at, my 60k salary is well manageable.
Though, I dont have problems adapting to most of the cities I've been to, and will also love to move down there. But owning to the present economic situation, is it worth I move ? Is it a trap ?.
Aside accommodation which my company has, Can I take care of myself in PH with my 60k allawee ?
PH based please, I need ur opinions, as I still have option to decline, as such, your views will be of much help at this time.
I think the first question would be; Where in PH? * Where is your office located in PH in contrast to the company owned accommodation? ** Is there a company shuttle from the accommodation to the office? *** How many days a week do you have to work / be in the office? ** **Will you be allowed to cook in the accommodation / or does the company have an in-service kitchen?
AncientAlien: I have been trying the website almost hour upon an hour since the outrage. Lucky for me it goes through like magic this time around. good to hear. one malt for everyone here
Romanoff: You are not responsible for that pregnancy.
You'd need at least 12 days before a missed period before you can be pregnant or even start "feeling somehow".
There's no pregnancy test that can say how far along she is, only an ultrasound can do that and she can never be two weeks pregnant.
She should be at least 4 weeks and some days pregnant with a thick endometrium with or without a gestational sac.
Take that lady to do an ultrasound in a good facility. Only an ultrasound sound can be accurate on dating a pregnancy. Last menstrual period isn't reliable due to irregularities of menstrual cycle.
If after the scan, the dates correlate, it would be time to come clean to your fiancee and be ready to deal with the consequences.
Pregnancy starts from the first day of last period, that week is week 1. So the week after a missed period is week 5.
@JudgeNotHi, you see this quoted comment here is the realest you can get. Let me even be clear with you If you are sure that when you cum, you unwrapped the used condom by yourself and you didn't see any dripping, no hole or anything, then that young lady was already pregnant before you slept with her, you are just a mugu she wants to hang it on, infact the whole "lemme come over to chill with you"was all premeditated. DON'T FALL FOR IT. Take her for an ultrasound (I bet you she will not go with you), because she knows the truth and let's even say it is still unclear thereafter, tell her no problem....that you will take the baby for DNA when she puts to bed, and only IF and ONLY IF the DNA result proves you are the father, only then would you decide how to proceed (Make it known to her that MARRYING HER WILL NEVER BE AN OPTION, because she just messed your life up). And who told you she doesn't know about your wedding plans??
As for your Fiancée, you will have to break the news to her, lets hope that by the time the ultrasound is out...it will settle the matter, then you can decide for yourself if you want to come clean or not. But if the scan doesn't resolve it, then you have to sit her down and tell her....no two ways about it. She has to make up her mind to marry you even with the "complication", please do not hide it from her. It will make you life less complicated than if she finds out after the wedding or even before it on her own.
Last advice ............NEVER LET ANY WOMAN TIE YOU DOWN INTO MARRIAGE AGAINST YOUR WILL COS YOU GIVE AM BELLE, I repeat NEVER EVER!!!
PLs if you have nothing Authentic to post just shutup!. This Video was shut back in 2016/2017 when he was just an FO with with us in NAFBase PH. The guys in this video with him were all colleagues though have now moved to other operations. Please allow us mourn our loss in dignity....last moments ko' final moments ni! Smh. #RIPChykoo #BlueSkiesCapt.
In the video you could see him just having fun with his fellow crew. Rip capt chika
Update SAD! "They waited for police report until he died" - lady mourns pilot of ill-fated helicopter that crashed in Lagos on Friday August 28
The helicopter belonging to Quorom Aviation, crashed into a wall separating two buildings at about 12noon on Friday. There were three crew members in the helicopter that flew into Lagos from Rivers state.
While two of the crew members died at the scene, one of them who happens to be the pilot, Chika Ernest, was rushed to the hospital.
According to his friend, Gloria Ugolee who is a sister to media personality, Emmanuel Ugolee, the pilot died as the hospital waited for a police report. She also revealed that late Chika emptied his fuel tank before crashing into the wall so as to avoid an explosion.
Really............ And Wike Won election in 2015, was that Lake Chad politics?
DigitalBrands01: Nothing like game on. Because Abuja Politics have never succeeded in Rivers State. You remember that the outed Commissioner of police was once Wikes worst nightmare.
Have you tried using JumiaFoods online? You should be able to place orders that should be delivered to you. Also, try to get out of GRA, enter RUmuomasi, and Stadium road, you go see local food for corner.
chino11: Rivers State lock down trapped me in Port Harcourt as I was about to return to base in Awka. Everywhere is locked down in Port Harcourt. Restaurants shut, fastfoods shut, hunger set in to 90 degrees.
I actually made moves, when I got to the boundary around Elele, stern looking combined team of army and police stationed were turning people back. Despite my contacts within the corridors of power in Rivers state, they never listened to me. I retreated back to PH, locked myself inside the hotel room, thinking of the next moves as my phone kept ringing, wifey was so worried about me.
I drove out of my hotel room where I have been trapped for almost a week now, I went round town, nothing to eat. Then I went to Market Square in GRA, see how people queued to enter the mall. It was like those experience one usually see back then at US embassy in Lagos.
In a nutshell, hunger could kill faster than Coronavirus. Let fastfoods, restaurants open for business.
Mods push this so that restaurants could open for some of us that can't cook. Thank you
Abeg tell me the village the tradition come from? If anyone wants an elaborate wedding, then both should be prepared to fund it! Dictate your wedding according to your pocket.
donstan18: Traditionally, a man is the chief sponsor of any wedding ceremony while the woman supports in a way she can. Reason, it's expected a man goes into marriage when financially stable and ready.
Allocating 50% to her passed a message that you'll be a type of husband who will be after the statistics of the wife's earning and spending. You sure wouldn't have done what you did if you hadn't any knowledge of her earning, you acted because you know her earning and that's a red flag for Nigerian ladies, because they don't like dragging and equal responsibilities in a home.
You don't go direct when you want a woman to contribute financially to something. You go Tactically[Not imposing, but asking how and where she can take care of, she'll choose, no matter the percentage of her choice, you lock up, keep the planning going, pretend like you are cool and then sketch out a personal plan of how to act worried and restless before her, she'll wanna know the problem, act like you wanna hide it from her, she'll be worried and pissed that you are hiding things from her, then you'll come up with a story and open up that you are facing financial crisis and don't know how to sort some things out concerning the wedding, she'll willingly help with pity without seeing you as a stingy or mean person]
No be everything dem dey form mancho, you go dey use your head.
You've spent on traditional wedding and for that not to be a total waste, kindly go and meet her, reason with her and go tactical, not directly with authority.
Ordinarily, I won't comment, but for the sake of us being brothers-at-arms, i will. You don't need someone to tell you what to do, don't wait for your life to become more complicated before you lay your cards on the table, it may sound rather rash, but if you can't work it out within the next few weeks, then what is the essence of being in the same ship if you can't have your peace and sanity. FYI, following a woman (wife or gf) all over the place is not necessarily an act of love or care, so what is it gonna be? Your life, your marriage............your call!
Cheato64: I got married in 2018, I love my wife so much and I know she loves me too but my wife is too dramatic.
She always claim she trusts me but mehn she doesn't let me out of her sight. I do everything and it's affecting me, we have a son and another is on the way, she has refused to learn how to drive on purpose, I take her everywhere, antenatal, market (hate this one the most), I drop and pick her from work, am forced to go church or other programs which I wouldn't like to go.
She goes through my phone every 3 days most especially at night. She noticed I snore I asked for a separate room, she will never let me, she Insists we sleep with light on.
Sometimes I pray for Nepa to take light. The day I called an ex that works in bank to assist me with transaction due to crowd, she went through my phone saw it, I had to explain out of anger she smashed my phone she does this very often she has smashed hers b4.
I feel like running away for a week but I can't leave my work or our son and she might go to my parents which I wouldn't want.
nero2face: please this so called school feeding, is it for some zones alone?, I've not seen nor heard anything of such here in SE/SS...pliz someone should inform me if am getting it wrong...
Nothing is being said in the media because it does not further the anti-buhari agenda. Honestly, these days i have notice that the media does not give publicity to anything that isn't Anti-buhari. RIP Gallant Soldier!
Emyres: Today's makes it a year that Air Chief Marshal Alex Badeh was assassinated.
Nobody is hearing anything about the case. What happened to the arrested culprits? Where is our Radio and Television stations? Where are the journalists? Nobody is talking about it. Case closed.
When do I submit my passport for stamping? I can book my flight.
PalmcreditNIG: If given the opportunity to pick between 15 million naira or to relocate to Canada, which will you pick? Me i will pick the money oooooo
Nellykuch: It has rained approval for me and MY FIVE KIDS!!!!!!! It can only be GOD!!!!!!!!!
Congratulations bro , how long did the whole process take and how much for the was expected as bank balance? Apologies, I am a newbie on this Canada Matter.
Bravo Sir. Pls you can contact @AbikeDabiriErewa on Twitter. These are the kind of issues she addresses ASAP within her scope of work.
chimauga: MY ORDEAL AT SOEKARNO-HATTA INTERNATIONAL AIRPORT JAKARTA, INDONESIA
There is this derisive impression about Nigerian passport holders in most of the International Airports in different parts of the world, especially in Indonesia. The Immigration officers molest, exploit and forcibly take huge amount of bribes from Nigerians and threaten deportation if one refuses to give in. This happens even when one has not committed any offence. They show no respect to one’s Status so far you are carrying Nigerian passport.
On the 17th June 2019, I was once again greeted with harassment by Indonesian Immigration officers. The ugly incidence spurred me to take up a fight against their intimidation of Nigerians. I know that what they are doing is a corrupt practice and we are their major victims. No matter how our country is, we do not deserve such discriminatory extortion.
So, on that day, I arrived Soekarno-Hatta International Airport Jakarta, Indonesia, in an Emirates Airline from Dubai (EK0356). On disembarking from the Aircraft, I was walking to the queue when an immigration officer halted me. He asked for my passport. As he saw a Nigerian passport, he took me to their office and handed my passport over to his colleague. I greeted the officer sitting down in the office. He ignored me. Three times I greeted so he could say what the problem was but he remained silent and kept deaf ears. So I stood waiting for him to break his silence. I was standing, waiting for what I do not know, for 30 minutes before he muttered any word. Finally, he asked of my hotel reservation, return ticket and my Visa receipt, which I presented all to him.
The next question was, "do you want to go into the country?"
I said "yes".
He replied, "Calculate the fare of a one-way ticket from Jakarta to Abuja and give it to me to permit you entry".
I pretended as if I didn't understand what he was saying. The next thing he did was to google the cost of a one-way ticket with his mobile phone and showed it to me that it was $1,200usd (N432,000). I kept silent, trying to make a sense out of his embarrassing demand. But he didn’t stop there. He threatened to deport me by making copies of my travel documents.
At this point, I remembered my sad experience on the 9th October 2018 on this same Airport for refusing to bribe an Immigration officer with $200usd which nearly lead to my deportation. On that fateful day, they had already handed me over to the security and airline staff, reconfirmed my return ticket, checked in my luggage for eventual deportation. Had it not been I was able to place a call to my visa sponsor who intervened immediately by calling the airport Immigration boss and pleaded on my behalf, I would have been deported for no reason and would have lost huge sum and time. To the glory of God, the deportation was reversed. Meanwhile, this is a country I have been traveling to for 12 years without any infraction of their laws in whatever way. I never overstayed my visit, never broke any law, never even accused of any offense. My only offense was carrying Nigerian passport.
With that bad experience, which I was not ready to have a repeat of, I decided to be soft to this one demanding I should bribe him with $1,200usd. He later came down to $500 (N180,000) after a prolonged pleading. I immediately gave him the money but copied his name and saved it in my phone.
On the 21st June 2019, I prepared petitions which I addressed to the following parastatals: 1. Kedutaan Besar Republik Federsi Nigeria (Ambassador, Embassy of Federal Republic of Nigeria) 2. Direktorat Jendral Imigrasi (Comptroller of Immigration) 3. Direktorat Saber Pungli (Anti-Financial Fraud) 4. Pengaddan Dugaan Pidana Korups (Anti-Corruption).
First, I visited the Nigerian Embassy, met with the Ambassador and handed over my petition to him. He summoned an emergency meeting with all the Embassy's senior staff. He appeared very impressive. He commended my courage and promised to follow it up.
I stepped out of the Embassy and moved to Indonesian Immigration headquarters. On my arrival at the Immigration, it was difficult to gain access to meet with the overall Boss, the Jendral (comptroller), but when I claimed to be a Nigerian diplomat, they let me in. They ran security checks on me, gave me a form to fill my purpose of visit. I filled "High Rate of Bribery and Corruption Scandal Going on at Soekarno-Hatta International Airport, Jakarta". This form must have caught the attention of the Immigration boss as he didn't hesitate to request for me.
I gave him my petition. He read but couldn't believe that such was going on in their Airport. I provided the name of the Staff, which I copied into my phone. He typed the name in an application in his Laptop and it displayed the photo image of the Immigration officer. I confirmed the picture was that of the man who collected bribe of $500usd from me. He thanked me for coming up with such information, which he said no one had ever brought to his desk. He made a promise that he would investigate the report and invite me for an update within 48 hours.
In less than 24 hours of my report, I was invited by the Immigration boss. Upon my arrival to his office, I was given a VIP treat. The Jendral, that is the Immigration boss, started with an apology on behalf of the entire Immigration and Indonesian government. He went further to tell me that the officer who extorted money from me accepted he did it, and implicated four other senior “intelligent” officers who were involved in the indecent act. He narrated that the five senior officers had been dismissed immediately, that their dismissal letter would be given to them at the end of our meeting.
A sealed envelope was handed over to me. Inside the envelope were an apology letter and a sum of $1,600usd. The Jendral did not know that the money enclosed in the envelope was above the amount they collected from me. He was so amazed when I told him the money was in excess of my money. He decided to confirm it himself and discovered that the corrupt officers at the Airport enclosed all the money they forcibly collected from Nigerians on board the Emirates Airline that conveyed me to Jakarta that day.
That was how I salvaged other Nigerians who arrived the Airport from that moment onwards. I was told Nigerian passport holders are now being attended to with full respect at the point of entry. The era of $500 to $1,000 bribe for nothing has been defeated.
Funny enough, the Nigerian Ambassador to Indonesia, who I first reported this case to, did absolutely nothing about it. He once told the Consular General, Emabassy of Nigeria, Indonesia, to inform me that they were still trying to get an appointment with the Minister of Foreign Affairs in Indonesia. Two months gone and they are still booking appointments. If I had waited for them, my money would have gone and our citizens visiting Indonesia for businesses would still be suffering intimidation and extortion. This is why nobody cared to report this crime to our Embassy because they all know that the report will be swept under the carpet.
In the photos are the petitions (with different addresses), Immigration form (Purpose of visit) and Immigration Letter of refund.
...talk about Helicopters, yes. But Niyi has been Ambo'd friend from way back. It really has nothing to do with his father's link with BAT. Babajide also has share holding in Helicopters group, does that mean he and Niyi are in a collabo with Visionscape? Besides, sources say the overhaul of the sanitation contract is even one of Ambo's sins So how does it add up?
FarahAideed: You clearly don't know the history of Tinubu and Chougoury and the role they play in Hi tech construction .. And please find out who the owner of the mini skyscraper on queens way that Vision scape is currently occupying as it head office and find out why Remi Makanjuaolas( a long time Tinubu crony) son is the only Nigeriian on the board of vision scape and whose interest he is holding there ..... Oga don't be a learner na
Kogi election and subsequent rerun even when the late Audu was ahead in votes easily comes to mind. Saraki should go and reconvene NASS and get down to pressing matters instead of playing God.
On a lighter note - "In my layman's understanding, the long recess of NASS is a person indictment of Saraki turning the national legislature into his personal estate"......shebi im talk im layman's mind too.
ODUBEZE: INEC did not handle this issue well at all!
They just proofed to the whole world that they are in APC camp and that portends danger for our democracy. This simply means that they cannot be trusted!
And if they cannot be trusted, how can they conduct 2019 elections
Promxy94: I see, Rt Hon Rotimi Chibuike Ameachi as a mentor, but the truth is Rivers state has been Wikemized....... I would have suggested they try Abe to check if he can get the power.
Hmmmm.....Abe? U dey dis our Rivers State? Abe wey no fit win Senatorial Election, he won't even win in his 4 Ogoni LGAs sef on a free n fair day. I pity him for trying to go against CRA who we all know did re-run just to put Abe in the senate.
ernesterioo: Examination tension is evil. What is the simplest word you have ever forgotten to spell in an exam hall?
Mine was ‘woman been’ instead of ‘human being’ av submitted my script before I remember d rubbish I wrote�����
I couldn't spell "is" .............Lol. That was GCE 1998, I came in late for the English paper and barely had enough time to do the letter writing part. Till date i still look back on that event and have a good laugh with my Children.
Mrakeli: Konga, e-commerce firm, has relaunched Pay On Delivery (POD) for the e-commerce market in Nigeria.
The service, which was launched August 1,2018, started with customers in Lagos, with plans to extend same service to other states from September 1st 2018.
The service is coming after Konga effectively achieved same day delivery of approximately 97 per cent of product orders in major cities in the last 30 days.
Confirming the development, the CEO, Konga Online, Mr. Nick Imudia, disclosed that POD was suspended when erstwhile owners – Naspers and AB Kinnevik were in discussions before the acquisition of the business by the Zinox Group.
“We have taken our time to restructure, improve our technology and capacity in terms of our own staff and logistics to meet customers’ expectations. We have invested substantially in our logistics arm, K-Express culminating in the acquisition of new line-haul trucks, delivery vansand motor bikes to meet the commitments of not just POD, but also achieve a minimum of 85 per cent same day delivery of major products categories by July 2019 across the nation as mandated by the Board of Konga.
“Someone must make it happen, and we have decided to take the bull by the horns with new mega warehousing and storage facilities being opened across the country with best in class technologies,” he affirmed. Imudia, also stated that Konga, in line with its status as the biggest composite e-commerce company in Africa, is expanding its retail network as promised by the company’s management, with a target of 100 stores before the end of 2019 but with a long-term ambition of achieving 774 stores by 2022
“Effective August 1, 2018 and considering Nigeria’s deficient payment system, Konga customers had several payment and delivery options. This will go a long way to excite our customers and expand the numerous order fulfilment channels available to our customers.
“In addition to pre-payment and payment on delivery, you have the additional option of ordering online to pay and collect from the nearest Konga retail store. Our customers can also walk into any of our stores nationwide and with the help of our staff, order products we do not have in store, then pay and collect when it is delivered at the store or we deliver it at their door-steps. At Konga, we consider the challenges of our market and simplify things for our customers. No other e-commerce company offers these delivery and payment options on the continent,” he concluded.
This is good, unlike JUMIA that introduced pay-before-inspection of goods. Imagine the madness !, i order on POD and then when the goods/item arrives, I must make payment before opening the carton to inspect. And if after inspection the item is defective or a wrong item, I will have to start calling customer care to start the process of refund...........#Jokers.
you just make up names and post them on ur twitter and expect everyone to believe this nonsense.
may i remind the big fool that 11 villages were attacked simultaneously and it would have taken a large crowd of bandits to attack all eleven villages.
Haba.....you just exposed your ignorance. Didn't you read where it was said "helping police with the investigation" The offa bank robbery did they catch all of them at once ? They have arrested these ones, hopefully they will provide information that will lead to further arrest n subsequent prosecution. Except you have something else in mind ....say acrimony
Besides,he didn't make up names, he was just reporting what the police made available for public consumption, Google is your friend.
Family › Re: My Wife Family Mounting Their Father Burial Expense On Me, How I Reacted At Once by Consula: 9:03am On Nov 14, 2024
