Welcome, Guest: Register On Nairaland / LOGIN! / Trending / Recent / New
Stats: 2,962,882 members, 7,188,288 topics. Date: Saturday, 26 November 2022 at 08:37 PM

DonaTee's Posts

Nairaland Forum / DonaTee's Profile / DonaTee's Posts

(1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10) (of 34 pages)

Politics / Re: $430 Million Enugu-Cameroon Highway To Be Ready Before End Of 2021- AfDB by DonaTee(f): 6:45pm On Jun 25, 2021
Realtalk20:
How beneficial is this project economically?

What volume of trade does Nigeria do with Cameroon yearly ?

I can't really quote figures but I know that some perishable foodstuffs that comes in from North during scarcity are sourced from cameroun
Health / Re: Isreal Evacuates 274 Citizens From Nigeria Over Coronavirus by DonaTee(f): 10:28pm On Mar 29, 2020
Tpave:
Is there something these greater nations are seeing that we Nigerians cannot see?. They're all eager to evacuate their citizens from Nigeria. They seem to believe that in weeks to come that we will loose control of this dreaded disease.
The lord is our strength

They can see our inadequate healthcare system and the possible disease explosion

3 Likes

Politics / Re: Lai Mohammed Wearing A Face Mask (Photo) by DonaTee(f): 7:50pm On Mar 25, 2020
Chamber2000:
Give a title to this picture

After looting the N-95 mask they expect health workers doing the job to use ordinary mask? They are joking
Health / Re: Trying To Conceive A Child? TTC by DonaTee(f): 7:59pm On Mar 03, 2020
barbie047:




Pls I need help interpreting this result. I did blood and urine test and tested positive. I went for abdominal and vagina scan and this was the result.


They are suspecting ectopic pregnancy. Please see a qualified gynae immediately. Avoid pressure or tension in the abdominal area. Take this as emergency until proven otherwise

2 Likes

Family / Re: My Wife Of 3 Years Is Very Shy Around Me by DonaTee(f): 11:21pm On Feb 29, 2020
Bervelyhillz:
This is a bit long but please bear with me.

I’ve been married to my amazingly beautiful wife for 3 years. The problem is she is very shy around me but at the same time seems to try to secretly please me constantly. It leaves me feeling guilty and I’m not sure of what to do next.

Backstory:

I met her through my mom. My MIL and my mom are childhood friends who grew up together. I never met her at the time since I lived in the US while She was in Nigeria. When I was 20 I saw her in a family friend’s wedding album. I was floored and my eyes were watering. She was the most attractive girl I had ever seen.

I figured out her FB and messaged her since I didn't want to initiate contact through our moms. I struck up a conversation. I soon realized that my mom fed info about me to my MIL which in turn got fed to her , so she already knew a fair bit about me. We chatted constantly, met up on my vacation to Nigeria , and hung out together every day. I learn she is still a virgin saving herself for marriage. I was still one too, mostly because A) I was chubby most of my life and didn't dare go near girls in that state and B) when I did start getting more fit, I already fell in love with her and it felt wrong dating at the same time. So yeah we had that in common.

Skipping ahead again to three years ago when I graduated from grad school. We met up a handful of times more, and things were awesome. She was outgoing with me, giggling over almost nothing and general silliness. We never did anything sexual, but we were intimate enough and honestly seeing her gave me goosebumps, so it wasn't on my mind. On one visit to Nigeria, she brought up the topic of marriage in a joking manner, something about how our mom's always planned it. I jokingly replied that I would be happy to marry her, then she got all serious and asked if I was for real. I said yes and, well, the rest is history.

The problem:

We had our wedding in Nigeria and, after the papers got sorted, she moved to the US to live with me. The first few months were interesting. She knows English pretty well and she majored in her native language, so she looked for translation jobs. She never got replies from employers, so I was getting a little suspicious, especially since she was an honors student at a pretty high ranking international university. I found out that she wasn't actually sending the applications out. I bring this up gently with her, and she starts tearing a bit telling me she wants to be a stay at home wife and that she didn't think I would be proud of her if she didn't get a real job. She says she was going to tell me soon, which I believe because I found a recent word document in our computer that was basically a draft of the speech she was going to give me. I don't mind her staying at home as I bring in enough money for the both of us and she is a really good cook.

This prompted me to sit down with her and figure out where our communication is breaking down. After a bunch of long discussions about this, I felt we were on the same page. She was still growing more timid around me and didn't start conversations easily with me, but she always seemed happy. I stepped up my displays of affection, showering her with compliments, hugs, and kisses. I would often catch her staring at me (usually while we ate), to which she would get red-faced and look away quickly. It’s been 3 years now and still does the smiling stare, except now she doesn’t look away when I catch her. The conversation starting has gotten a bit better, but nowhere near pre-marriage. While she always had this quiet peacefulness to her, I noticed she is intentionally not doing things that might get me worked up. Examples being: discussing politics (we have the same views), discussing my work problems, discussing anything philosophical in nature, etc. She will respond if I start, but she doesn’t take the initiative like before. I really miss that.

The sex is...interesting? As I said before, I didn't have any prior experience so I can't judge her, but she just lays on the bed and doesn’t move until I suggest to. She never initiates but never declines. I try to make it about her more often than not, but if I’m looking for feedback she quietly agrees with whatever I'm doing. After we finish, she lays in the same position looking at me, sometimes smiling, sometimes teary-eyed. I take it she likes it, but then again she never likes to talk about sex. From what I gather in our pre-marriage talks, she doesn't have any negative views on it and it wasn't shunned by her parents, it's just that she is shy. She doesn't like me seeing her naked even though I do (ha ha...:/ ). She is…shy very well proportioned…and I tell her how it is so she shouldn’t feel self-conscious. But she still covers up outside of sex.

Another issue is fitness: I work out constantly at home or in the park (calisthenics) and I invite her to join but she politely declines. She runs almost every morning so I thought maybe she gets enough from that. But I have noticed that my weight backpack at home is sometimes at a different weight than when I left it. I have also noticed She has made some serious butt/thigh gains which really stand out on her thin frame. When I ask if she is doing anything differently, she says “maybe it’s the running” then changes the subject. I don’t understand why she is working out in secret. This is most likely my fault though since I used to try and tease her into working out with me; I made a silly remark about how squatting/ham-raises will put more meat on her legs.

Conclusion:

Guys and gals, I need help. I love my wife dearly. She is funnier than any comedian, more disciplined than any soldier, and more beautiful than any celebrity. But she is making me feel weird by trying to secretly improve herself based on my preferences. Her shyness around me is awkward and I want a return to the easy-going pre-marriage . Has anyone had experience with this?

Also: she has made many friends here and still is in contact with a few back home. However she doesn't seem excited to be around them as much as when I offer to go out with her. She's always offers to cancel plans to stay in with me or go for a walk. I thought she might be depressed, but she is super cheerful even when she doesn't know I'm around.

You need to type your own speech So she Cant Gently read it n see what's on your mind
Celebrities / Re: Daddy Freeze Reacts To Video Of A Wife Who Confronted Husband’s Side Chick by DonaTee(f): 10:32pm On Feb 29, 2020
Olalan:
Yes she should direct her grievances to her husband but we also need to condemn this seeming craze of young ladies dating married men. People who are in the know will tell you how desperate young ladies are to date married men by all means.

When they start shouting direct the anger on the husband. Poom!!! Women start with stabbing and pouring hot water...... I'm still looking for who will explain what they mean by directing it to the hubby grin

6 Likes

Family / Re: Married But I'm Not Connected With My Husband, Hence I'm Depressed by DonaTee(f): 11:09pm On Feb 22, 2020
Girlwhocares:
Please help me, I'm loosing my sanity everyday!
I'm scared to open up to friends and families because of what they will think or how disappointed or bad I will make them feel, also I'm afraid people will be judgemental about my actions.

I'm not physically and emotional connected with my husband which is affecting our marriage and my well-being, we live as co-tenant, we hardly have any conversation, we do things differently, we share different rooms, no sex for the past 3 years! Even during courtship and the fist two years of marriage I can account for days we were intimate.

Things are fallen out of place everyday, we have a child together who will be 4yrs and the thought of having another child has not crossed my mind.

I get irritated at everything, I hardly show appreciation towards him even if it means he has done his best, which later i will find myself guilty and try to make up but the spark and connection isn't just there.

Most times, I have a non-challant attitude towards him and everything he does to make me happy.

I feel lonely, bored and incomplete even when I'm 90% sure my husband loves me and always ready to make me happy.

I feel awkward communicating my feelings and thoughts to him because I know I might flare up with anger even when he hasn't done or said anything to warrant it.

Please I have come to this faceless forum to pour out my mind, my heart is heavy, I need someone to talk to, I'm afraid my personal intention of walking out this marriage even when my husband hasn't done anything to deserve this might backfire and has its negative effect on our child.

I honestly don't need anyone to insult me please as I'm going through a lot. All i need is mature married wo(men) opinions

Thank you for your time.


You need counselling. Search for @kingsleypst on Instagram. Follow him, listen to his teaching. You can reach out to him for counselling
Family / Re: How Can I Stop My Ex From Visiting My Matrimonial Home? by DonaTee(f): 12:26pm On Feb 03, 2020
SifonAbasi:
Good morning friends.

Please how can I politely stop my ex from visiting my home?

Yesterday was the third time my husband returns from work to meet my ex in our house.

After the incident that happened between us, my ex started coming closer to my husband and they became distance friends.
My husband invited him to our child's naming ceremony and that was how he got to know our house.

Eversince then he has been visiting and I am not comfortable with it.
I told if he must come he should come when my husband is around.

Please what should I do?
start by not opening your door to him. If he Stays outside he ll go in a short while.

Devil wants to give you a scandal. Be wise and crafty about it. I Dont Even understand your hubby. But be very very Wise.
Politics / Re: MURIC: "Amotekun Is A Christian Name, Must Be Changed" by DonaTee(f): 9:20pm On Jan 28, 2020
edoairways:
He raised some valid points such as registration of security officers via birth certificate from the church.

When Did Church start taking deliveries viz a viz issueing birth certificate in addition?
Health / Re: Is There A Way To Boost Human Growth Hormone. My Brother Is Going Dwarf by DonaTee(f): 12:41pm On Jan 01, 2020
Jayskit:
Hello people good morning. Please I am writing this narrative on behalf of my younger brother. And I would like to get the best advice and suggestions from Medical Practitioners.

Now to the main issue, my younger brother is a boy of 15 years old but he is extremely short compared to his age and his peers. It is important to also know that the boy eats well and there is no disturbance to the brain whatsoever. The point is that our parents are not short, even myself, I am above 6ft tall. Where the problem came from is what I don't understand. Also the boy has not started experiencing Puberty which is a source of worry to my parent and to myself as well.

We have seek medical assistance at a general hospital. Where he underwent series of test where he is diagnosed with deficient HUMAN GROWTH HORMONE and THYROID(I am not sure of the spelling). Also another test he underwent states that his skeletal system is that of a 7 year old boy whereas he is 15. The doctor then advised my parent of an Hormone boosting inject and she said the injection is not available in Nigeria and cost roughly about 2 million Naira which is not even a consideration based on our family standard.

Also he is SS1 and doing very fine academically. But the problem is that I don't like him get bullied and also him not experiencing puberty yet is a serious concern.

Please the Medical Practitioners in the house is there a effective Natural way to boost this HUMAN GROWTH HORMONE and THYROID.

Please comments and suggestions are well encouraged.

Thank you for reading..

lalasticala dominique

He needs to see an endocrinologist. Take him to a teaching hospital to see a consultant endocrinologist
Health / Re: I'm Depressed Over My Height by DonaTee(f): 10:44pm On Nov 26, 2019
Adekun33:
Am 19yrs old and I am 188cm i.e 6.2ft. I feel so awkward about my height. I feel that am no longer tall but long, for a very long time now i hated everything about my height to the extent I feel very sad and depressed every day.

As a result of that, I've lost confidence in myself and also my self-esteem is nothing to write home about.

This has made me an introvert and I don't socialize.

So pls tall dudes out there, I want to know how you deal with your self esteem and confidence and also how you approach comments about your heights cuz am gradually going insane!!!

See am endocrinologist doctor
Family / Re: Should Wife Give Her Inheritance To Her Husband? by DonaTee(f): 9:10pm On Nov 21, 2019
Janelle08:
Hi Nairalanders,

What is your opinion on this topic.

In a situation where a woman receives some inheritance from her father or a share of her late father's property, is she expected to hand over her inheritance (money) to her husband?

Married folks over to you. Women, how will you handle your inheritance? Men, how do you expect your wives to handle her inheritance?

No. Will he give her his own?
Family / Re: Sometimes I Regret Marrying My Wife by DonaTee(f): 6:57am On Oct 23, 2019
Mrcashman87:
I am not new to Nairaland but I have to use this account for my story . I have met her in 2009 she was calm , doesn’t talk much but easily get angry and I also noticed that she wasn’t a good cook but was good in other things ( chores) , it didn’t stopped me from loving her, I didn’t tell any of my people even though I have sisters that are good cook but I decided to take her to catering school to learn how to cook which she went for lessons to practice.

We got married in 2013 , she got pregnant that same month and she became so lazy that I will go to work and come back to found the house very messy with everything’s all over the places , dirty dishes and not dinner yet, and I have to take over cleaning and cooking dinner for us. She claimed she could not longer clean the house , she is tired and need to rest so I have decided to get a house help for her , a small 14 years old, this girl was hard working , very obedient but to my wife she is evil , every single day I comes back from work , this girl is always in tears my wife will beat the hell out of her to the extent of giving her black eye , if I confront her she will start accusing me of sleeping with the girl which is not true, I can never stoop so low to sleep with an underage girl. I have nieces of similar ages what I wouldn’t want another person to do to my nieces and wouldn’t do to another person daughter.

One time I came back from work to found the girl in a pool of blood , that my wife hit her with a wooden chair and she had a deep cut on her head , I got angry with my wife even her reasons didn’t make sense to me , all because she asked the poor girl to warmed up the baby milk and she mistakenly left it for too long , the milk was too hot to give to the crying baby so she got angry at her and hit her . I have told my wife she shouldn’t act like that no matter what and here come again you are sleeping with her and that’s why u are siding with her , we had an heated argument that I have left the house to cool down , I came back after 5 hours and next morning I have send for my brother to take the girl back to her parents , I have given her money 30k to manage that was how the girl left the house.

When our first child was 6 months , we found out she was 2 months pregnant she cried that the baby is too small , she can’t keep the pregnancy , I have begged her to keep that everything will be alright . Our twins were born a girl and boy , having 3 children under 2 wasn’t easy for us and I have to go to work while she staying with the kids all alone and she was depressed , I have decided to bring in a house help 15 years old boy , the same thing repeated again , she was maltreated him the same thing she did with the girl , that boy didn’t even stays with us for 2 months , he run away . I came back to found her crying that the boy has slapped her and run away, I was angry for what he did even swear if I catch him , he will regret the day he was born but the other way I knew that boy did it for self defence .

After the boy left I said no more e help , she will have to manage alone because I couldn’t help her anymore , but my house become dirty that I wouldn’t even want to bring in visitors because of the state of the house , dirty plates can stay in the sink for 3 -4 days , laundry she has a washing machine but she couldn’t bother to do , cooking we eats take away every single night , imagine I comes back home 9pm due to my job and Lagos traffic , at that time I’m even exhausted but I have to started cleaning , one time I got pissed with her that she didn’t wash the eldest daughter school uniform and all her uniform 5 sets of uniform were dirty and she had no clean one to put on in the morning , I have to wash them at 10pm and for her she didn’t see anything wrong with that.

When the twins were 1 years she told me she is tired of staying at home that she wanted to go to work , I have told her to wait at least for them to be a year and 6 months to start school before she can pursue her career but she disagreed with me, so I gave her money for business , she opened a shop . We had an agreement that she should be closing down her shop at 7pm so she could be home with the kids and take care of the house , she was ok and I got a elderly woman as a help , she doesn’t lives with us , she comes at 6 am and closes at 8pm and I also brought 2 of my nieces 18 and 11 to the house. Every since she started working she has never get home on time , sometimes she stays until 10pm , if I talk she get angry and will start raining insults on me , we haven’t make love in a long time , she always complains of being tired , her stomach is paining her etc etc. I have decided to leave her alone and not bother her about sex anymore , and it doesn’t bother too. She acts as im a nobody to her. So it happened in July I came back home to found my niece 11 years old with a deep cut and blood on her eyebrows and my wife did it just because the girl broke a plate so she hit the girl with the broken plate , first all I had to rush her to the hospital and she had 11 stitches and went back home, all I wanted to sit with her and to talk sense with her but she wasn’t even interested all she could do was shouting at me , accusing me of sleeping with both my nieces and the elderly house help , was so angry that I have beaten her badly which I later regretted and apologise to her.

That was the first time I have lay my hand on her something I vow not to do to the woman I love but she pushed me so bad and I have been remorseful but she refuse to forgive me . It’s now 4 months we don’t talk , we don’t sleep in the same room , she just do her own and come home anytime she pleases. I just don’t know what to do anymore , I love my wife and children but her attitudes isn’t right. We have 3 beautiful children 5and twins are 4. Sometime i want to divorce her but when I think about my children I just don’t feel like going ahead with divorce but I’m also a human and can’t stop living like this .

Please my brothers and sisters help me with your advices

Time for family meeting. From both sides. Make everyone talk Wetin em problem be

2 Likes 1 Share

Health / Re: I Have This Skin Problem And I Am About To Get Married (Graphic Photo) by DonaTee(f): 11:59am On Oct 08, 2019
skin2care4:
There is this skin problem I have Been having on my body for quite a while now especially on my chest as you see in the pic below.

It doesn't seem to respond to all the treatments I have used on and it's not itchy, it doesn't hurt at all. and it seems it runs in the family including some of my cousins too. Please and please Doctors and skincare experts in the house can you help me with a solution to this problem? Am planning on getting married very soon. Thank you God bless.

See a dermatologist in a teaching hospital for possible skin biopsy
Jobs/Vacancies / Re: Accept This Job Offer Or Continue Job Hunting??? by DonaTee(f): 3:39pm On Oct 02, 2019
Ghostty:
Hello All.

I have been visiting this site as a guest for 2years, but today I had to sign up as a member. I do not intend to write so much, so permit me to go straight to the point.

I graduated in 2017 from one of the federal university in the South and finished my NYSC last year April. Ever since I have been hunting for jobs so to keep body and soul, I have written hundreds of job exams and attended several interviews but none has yielded any positive result yet.

Last month a friend of mine whose Uncle works in a Chinese Steel Production Company told me about an opening in the Marketing department of the company, he told me they were recruiting for the role of a Purchaser and a Sales Executive and advised that I should go submit my CV for consideration.

I did as advised and the following day I was called for a test. On getting there, I met three(3) other guys who also came for the same purpose. The Chinese HR guy came and administered the test and afterwards only two of us passed and were asked to come back the next day for the oral interview.

The next day I went for the interview and after being drilled and asked several questions I was offered the job. But my zeal and interest for the Job died the moment I was told the job conditions and pay.

Working hours are from 7am to 6pm daily, Monday to Saturday including public holidays. All these for a monthly pay of 35k

I was given the offer letter to take home to sign if I agree with the conditions and return it this coming Monday to resume work.

My fellow Nairalanders, would you advise that I take this job offer considering the conditions attached or reject it and continue job hunting hoping that one day favour would smile on me I am confused, please help a brother cry

Please help a brother push this to FP so I can get all the advice I need as much as possible. Thank you.

Chinese ke. Pls run for your life. Their working condition n staff welfare is suicidal. It's not even about the 35k. Them go owe for that one. But the risky job can kill with no insurance.
Family / Re: Ladies Breastfeeding Baby In Public. Right Or Wrong? by DonaTee(f): 6:59pm On Oct 01, 2019
PrimadonnaO:


I know the mother-baby bond that happens with breastfeeding.

I don't live in the public. So whenever I'm in public, and especially when I can't find privacy, baby would feed from the bottle. kiss

Are you aware some babies reject bottle feeds as the tip doesn't feel like nipple?
Are you aware some wail n fight with the neck of your clothes till they expose the boobs?

My dear just go out with a breastfeeding friendly dress n try to locate a corner to do the thing peacefully to avoid fight grin some babies can fight dirty without backing down
Family / Re: My cousin who got married this year July is actually thinking of leaving the man by DonaTee(f): 3:51pm On Sep 15, 2019
Acidosis:
I be man, I be man, na so woman go dey use una head play ping pong. If you actually believe that a woman you just wedded (with no child) will give you her organ, then you're stup!d.


Valid point. Some women Even with kids go still dey reluctant.
If he hid his health status from her then that May be the cause.

And If he passes on, she ll be scarred ofcourse she May need to remarry
Family / Re: My cousin who got married this year July is actually thinking of leaving the man by DonaTee(f): 3:42pm On Sep 15, 2019
All these people shouting give him one kidney bla bla bla Its easier said than done. If she can give fine, If she Cant lipsrsealed she Has the choice to make. This Has Nothing to do with wickedness. Her mental State is very important here. Training her in school does not equate 1 kidney.

Its a Pity their love doesnt Seem to bê enough

Some Men Cant Even donate blood for their wives who's in labor b Bleeding. Ofozia donating organs..... Its not for the faint hearted
Crime / Re: Police Officers Shuts Down Shoprite, Lekki. Stop Criminals From Vandalizing It by DonaTee(f): 7:31pm On Sep 03, 2019
1x2x3:
Exactly what I hate about out police. They would rather kill their citizens to protect a foreigner.

Protesters for Jus Keep quiet n strike at midnight guerilla style.
Health / Re: Constipation: How Do I Treat This Long Term Disease Naturally? Please, Urgent! by DonaTee(f): 5:17pm On Aug 18, 2019
TerryMcGinis:
pls where can I find this beetroot

Hausa mallama selling cabbage carrot etc usually sell it
Health / Re: Constipation: How Do I Treat This Long Term Disease Naturally? Please, Urgent! by DonaTee(f): 8:28pm On Aug 12, 2019
TerryMcGinis:
Am 26+, male and have been suffering from constipation for a long time now, since 2007/08 if I remember correctly, it started as mild constipation, but then it started getting worse.

I'd go for days, 4/5 before I would be able to go to the loo...and even when I finally go, I don't get to empty my bowel completely, its just little that comes out, my stomach is always bloated, even when I haven't eaten, p.s I used to have a flat tummy. But nowadays my tummy is always swollen. After managing to go to toilet, I still feel the need to go, because I just pass out very small quantity of faeces no matter how much I eat, and how much I strain to push them out, it doesn't change.
I've tried incorporating fruits and I drink lots of water, I drink two satchet of water or more sometimes, I've reduced fried meals still no change.

I believe I'm suffering this ailment because as a teen I was always fond of indulging in late night meals, heavy meals like especially beans and bread, and my theory is that I've over worked my stomach, and upset the balance, I'm really suffering, as I type I'm not at ease at all...I'm always hearing noise in my stomach, lest I forget, I have been experiencing symptoms of ulcer for four to five years now.

Practitioners in the house I need your help on how to clean my colon of old faeces stuck inside my intestines, so I can be free, and feel light again, its impossible for me to lose weight because of it, when I don't eat well, I would get constipated for long term. And when I visit the loo, I would pass out very tiny stuff.

Please help a brother if you know anybody that has experienced this before and found a solution to it. God bless you all.


Front page pls: mods. I beg you in the name of God.

Watermelon and beetroot smoothie daily. If you are a lady you can add 1 tablespoon of flaxseed and grind all together.
Family / Re: My Wife Changed 2 Weeks After Wedding!! by DonaTee(f): 10:55pm On Aug 04, 2019
Anonymus010:
I Need The Advice Of Experienced Married Men

NB: This is not my real account, I created this account for the purpose of this issue.

Please, I need the advice of married people (especially married men). I will make the story as simple as possible and I promise not to compromise the truth to favour me in this issue.

Brief Introduction: I am a man in my late 20's. Got married last year and currently have a 3month baby.

Brief history of my relationship prior to marriage: I dated my wife for 4years before we finally tied the knot last year. I met her in the university, we were classmate in school.

Before I started dating my wife, I was dating a girl in the same class but we both agreed to separate after 1year because we were age mate and she was keen on getting married immediately after graduation which I knew I will not be ready for marriage by then (Note: No sex in the relationship, She was a virgin and because I couldn't assure her of marriage, I didn't sex her).

After the break up with my ex, I became close to my wife and we started dating. She was self sufficient as she had a source of income while in school, she supports me, gives me money, cooks and buy me food etc. She was the best woman any man can think of. I fell in love along the line and decided this is the right lady to marry.

Note: There were several backlashes from other classmates insinuating she snatched me from my ex but we scaled through all that. We dated for 2more years in school and we graduated. We dated for another 2more years post school till last year.

Brief history immediately before marriage: Everything was fine till my wife's birthday last year. I did tripple shifts at work(48hrs work non-stop) and came back a night before her birthday and slept off. I woke up 2:30am to wish her happy birthday. She got angry and told me I didnt put her in mind and that I was not the first person to wish her happy birthday (She later told me her ex wished her first at exactly 12am). I apologised to her and told her the reason I missed the time. I had just 10k, gave her 5k to do a birthday photoshoot, used about 3k to buy her goodies as salary has not been paid.

Fast forward to after 1week of the birthday, she came up with serious issue, saying she wanted a break but not total break-up for some months to put herself together. She lamented she was not getting anything from the relationship, I don't usually take her out, I didnt celebrate her birthday well for her, I didnt buy cake, I didnt buy gift etc. I apologised and pleaded with her to be patient as we had big projects before us (wedding, masters degree and family apartment) which she knew I was saving for. We settled it and had sex. After 7days, I saw a call log on her phone where she had a conversation with her ex for almost an hour between 11pm and 12am. After 1month, she missed her menses and was pregnant. I asked her if she ever saw her ex, she cried and swore that she didn't (Note: I trusted her because she is modest and she is not the sex type). So, I agreed, accepted the preg, quickly arranged an impromptu wedding, I quickly sourced for money, spent over N2million on the wedding......

THE PROBLEM:

2weeks after the weeding, my wife started abusing my family especially my mum, telling me she hated how my family behaved during the wedding. I pleaded with her not to allow this to affect our home. The insults and abuse became perpetual. My wife works from home and will give me several reasons why she cannot cook after giving her money for food stuffs once I collect salary. Its just 2 of us living in a mini flat & I wash my clothes myself, but she will give me thousands of reasons how the non-existent house shores prevent her from cooking.

After 9months, she gave birth, I asked her who she wanted to come do omugo with the baby between her mum and my mum. She opted for my mum (claimed her mum will be giving her problem). Not up to 1week that my mum came over, she has started complaining about everything she does. Despite the fact that this woman will wake up 5am, wash everybody's clothes, bath the baby but she doesnt cook. My wife started complaining about her being obligated to cook every morning because of my mum's presence(Note: she doesnt cook in the morning, if I am going to work by 8am, I will either warm a left over previous night's food or source for food outside). When the complain was becoming overwhelming to the point of her almost insulting my mum in my presence, I told her I will tell my mum to go back to her house( my mum lives in a mini flat too with my dad, so they are very comfortable). She said I shouldn't. After 1 month, my mum left. The abuse, insults and complain continued. She will nag about how my mum did when she was with us, abuse and insults my family. I will appeal to her and defend my family. My wife became complete opposite of who she was when we were dating.

The real issue at hand: We would be migrating to the US soon. Lately, I can't control my wife, anytime I don't buy her idea or wish, she will rain insults on me. Just 3days ago, she told me I don't have sense repeatedly just because she said we should go and greet her mum's pastor which I told her not now but we can go later. If I tell her to do something, she will do otherwise and give me thousand of reasons she can't do it. 2months ago, I reported all her attitudes to her mum, her mum talked to her but no change, she is getting worse. Last week, I did 24hours at work, I got home, my wife didn't cook. I got into the kitchen, made custard and placed the soup on the gas cooker. We were both in the living room. She perceived the soup was getting burnt and insulted me, telling me it was because I was not the one that dropped money for the soup, thats why I wanted to burn it (She cooked the soup with her money because my salary was delayed). She insults me at will, gives me no respect and treat me as trash.(Note: I had never cheated on her and she doesn't doubt my fidelity. Likewise, I had never suspected her of such too).

I am currently scared because I know US is women's world because I have included her and the kid as my dependents in my green card petition. I am scared for my life and career because she could go worse in the US and destroy all I have laboured for.

Please kindly advise me on what I can do to change her.

Sorry for the long write up and any grammatical errors.

If all you said us the Truth, then USA, Nigéria or anywhere in the world, you are living in Hell. She's not ready for marriage
Family / Re: I Caught My Housemaid Sexually Assaulting My Son by DonaTee(f): 6:32am On Jul 16, 2019
Timih:

She's not... We didn't have maid before.. We just employed this maid because she just gave birth and we just relocated few months ago....our plan is when the baby is old enough, the maid will go.. The maid's work is limited

It shouldnt have included Bathing him. Thats when it all Starts. Having to wash his peepee n pulling it.....some out of curiousity or prior experience by the girl.
A 7yr old should be able to Bathe him self.
Pls call him and talk to him in every way you can. Get information from him. Call the girl separately n do same before Sending her away.
He needs to see a Child psychologist too. Also engage him in chores and activities that give less time to think or engage in unwholsome activities.

My little experience......
Í Was watching a movie it got to a romantic scene of holding hands, holding gazes But no kissing of any kind, só í didnt bother to change the Chanel But my son started giggling.

Í asked him why he said he's enjoying the movie, í Just removed the programme. Then he told me the programme made his wee wee to bê strong. He Was Just 5yrs+. Í Dont Leave him at home with any cousins and all that and í eavesdrop on all his convo with older cousins that come visiting. If im not with him, his dad or grandma is with him or he's in school. We bê doing that since he Was born.

Í realised that sexual feeling is innate But when given opportunity it can develop before time with unhealthy exposure and these are things they Did innocently without being corrected .
Since that day in my house no movies whatsoever.
Health / Re: Fake Doctor Performed Over 500 Surgeries & Caused 46 Deaths Before Arrest- DSS by DonaTee(f): 9:14pm On Jun 21, 2019
dominique:


That's remarkable but the Mustapha that was caught confessed to have forged his certificate. How can one now differentiate between an original and a forged MBBS certificate?

Thé minister for health Who Advised doctors to venture into farming and tailoring if they Dont get a job in Nigeria should be able to give à suitable answer
Health / Re: Any Medical Professional Should Explain This Transvaginal U/S Scan, Please by DonaTee(f): 5:18pm On Jun 09, 2019
OWNwithEASE:
My wife went for a blood test in 2 different labs and the result from both centers indicates She was pregnant. We did a scan but the scan did not see She was pregnant, we were then advised to do Transvaginal U/S scan. Our next appointment with the doctor is next week but She is not at peace at the moment. Pending the time we see the doctor next week, Pls any medical practitioner should explain what the statement of result mean


Do a blood pt. Then repeat scan in 2wks
Health / Re: Anyone Trying IVF/IUI/ICSI (Fertility Treatments)? by DonaTee(f): 12:05pm On May 31, 2019
omalichachim:
Good day fruitful mamas, I'm new here, I hv been following silently, please can someone suggest a good Ivf clinic in Enugu. I want to try and I'm praying that we all will be successful in all the ones we are trying in Jesus name, Amen.

I ve Heard so much positive reviews about Mbanefo hospital in Enugu. I Heard they are Good. Pls if you use them get back to us here. People in south east need such info how good they are.

God be with you.
Health / Re: Epidermolysis Bullosa: Help Save My Sister's Baby With Solution To This Ailment by DonaTee(f): 12:42pm On May 11, 2019
SPOILT9JAOLOSHO:
Good morning Nairalander's

Please I need the input of doctor's/nurses/anyone that knows or experienced this child ailment before to help save my niece cry.

Here is the details..

My elder sister who lives in the east gave birth to her 3rd child, a baby girl in 2015 but she was born with this unknown ailment. It usually starts from the hand, they took her to hospitals but doctor's seemed uncertain of what the ailment was, they also took her to some other places trying to find solution to it but to no avail. Within few days it spread to her nails and they subsequently fell off. One week later it spread all over her body that if you lie her on the bed she cries all time due to the pain and when u raise her up her skin glues to the wrapper used in lying her down. After days of trying to find solution with no success they were confused. Then one early morning around 4am the father carried her to ease the pain and make her to stop crying without knowing the baby was dead 10 minutes ago, it was when they discovered they wept and made arrangements and buried her in the morning.

After that, they had another baby and she was free from it.

Now on May 8, 2019 she gave birth to a baby girl (photo attached) but the baby was born with this same deadly ailment. They took her to FMC they said it is "epidermolysis bollusa". Please I need information from anyone who knows about this ailment and how to cure it, I don't want a repeat of what happened last time abeg.


Mods*
Please make una help me push this to FP to save a soul cry cry

Thanks

See à renowned dermatologist in a teaching hospital

1 Like

Science/Technology / Re: Latest Clay Pot 'Water Dispenser' That Got People Talking - Photos by DonaTee(f): 9:08pm On Apr 17, 2019
sirdonbright:
Very nice innovation

Been looking for this dispenser pot.

As for those shouting n degrading African technology, African clay pot is a source of alkaline water that they oyibo is hyping and selling to you all.

You don't discard your technology, you modify n discard what truely needs to be discarded

5 Likes

Family / Re: My Husband Threatened To Divorce Me Because Of His Friend. by DonaTee(f): 12:35am On Mar 31, 2019
Chinnyrita27:
Good day nairalanders. I created this account to seek for advice as I am confused and crying as I type this. I have been happily married for 4 years with a daughter of 3 and my husband. Not about a week ago, I had issues with one of his friend in his absence in our home. He had this close friend who came visiting on a faithful evening last Monday(I was not strong enough to go to work),he came when my husband wasn't around so I had to leave whatever I was doing to keep him company while we wait for my husband, at some point I offered to get him food, he obliged and ate, it was not upto 30 minutes after eating, he asked me to go buy him card. Politely, I told him I can't as was so tired and weak to walk about 10 minutes under the sun, i suggested to recharge free for him from my bank, he insisted, frowned his face and asked if I was trying to tell him that he can't recharge from his account, I was shocked, he stood up angry and aggressively and drove out of the compound. I didn't utter a word, I was angry but kept calm.

Not until my husband came back, and when I was about to welcome him but, he angrily yield and screamed at me and asked why I had to insult his friend and call him poor. I angrily asked him why he believed his friend without trying to confirm the from me, we deeply quarrelled and he made statement threatening to end the marriage if I cannot respect his friends and his people. I have never disrespected him or any of his friends and family members before, I'm so confused, we have not be conversing and relating well since Monday. I tried to make peace with him as I wasn't comfortable keeping malice with him but he said I will have to apologise to his friend which is something I don't think I can do.

I am so confused, what should I do?

When you angrily replied, you made a mess of the situation because you don't know what his friend told him. Sometimes, Silence is golden you could have said your mind/tell him what really happened later when tempers are down.

I advise you be extremely careful n observant because both of them are acting suspicious.
Properties / Re: These Houses In Ebute Metta Are Too Close To Each Other (pictures) by DonaTee(f): 8:35pm On Mar 15, 2019
The ventilation is non-existent. The landlords and the engr. Need mental evaluation.

16 Likes

Romance / Re: How Do I Make My Manhood Bigger, Fatter And Long Lasting To Save My Marriage? by DonaTee(f): 5:12pm On Dec 18, 2018
BluStreak:


True & proven for brreast. I dont know for the D!ckk

Do you have idea of how to make the fresh Pandoro into dry powder?
Family / Re: Lady Reveals Why She And Her Husband Live In Separate Houses by DonaTee(f): 10:59am On Nov 15, 2018
highqueen:
Perfect.
This kind of relationship last more than the one you and husby will stay under one roof and on the same bed monitoring each other like agents.

Please, personal peace and comfort is the way to go.


I like such serenity.

You sure? What about early morning cuddles

(1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10) (of 34 pages)

(Go Up)

Sections: politics (1) business autos (1) jobs (1) career education (1) romance computers phones travel sports fashion health
religion celebs tv-movies music-radio literature webmasters programming techmarket

Links: (1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10)

Nairaland - Copyright © 2005 - 2022 Oluwaseun Osewa. All rights reserved. See How To Advertise. 521
Disclaimer: Every Nairaland member is solely responsible for anything that he/she posts or uploads on Nairaland.