₦airaland Forum

muzeze77:
Why demand apology for a statement that is true?demanding such will be like trying to bend the truth. Try to support our president. He does not have a zoology phd but he clearly does not reason like an ediot. Would apology put food in the stomach of hungry nigerians? Would an apology fix our roads and build refinary ? I have a masters degree but never anticipated this type of response.surely to be smart requires no degree. Mr buhari please continue your job anyone that does not like the way you are working can jump into the lagoon

please Bro for the sake of Next time don't say people should jump into the lagoon rather try this " I refer you to the instructions of Oba of Lagos in the wake of the last general election " they'll get it. saying direct may be too traumatic for those involved.
Hope u got my drift tho.

Haaa! FG why na? See why Nigeria is still struggling?

Toks2008:
And Seun has the audacity to use words like victim for the female folks...i know one day he will eat those words and will regret ever apologizing for this title.

My first conent says...never beat a lady which is fair enough and then listed the facts that are as true as day and night but Seun is still naive so i understand his point.

There was a lady i dated and she told me that she is the type tthat needs to be beaten up but i said never will i raise my hand against her and when she showed her color i gave her some verbal lashing that made her cry and for 3yrs she left the affair just to call me this year to say she would have prefered that i beat her up rather than going verbal...can you imagine.

Seun is indeed a learner when i comes to he issue of women so let jim postrate to nland ladies to apologize for the truth he will latter realize and when he does,he will hate himself for making that unwarranted apology...im 41 and i have seen things in life but all these todlers on nland knows nothing about this matter until they get to a more mature stage in life.

Bro leave the part of him apologising. look at it from the business angle. he has a group of displeased ' customers' and he is trying to please them. that I understand. I don't expect different from him.
Take the support and criticism all in one grace. you can't have all supporting your view. Appreciate everyone and move on. you exercised courage to have a different view on a sensitive, bias prone issue and I commend you. Everyone can't see from your vantage point. so just remember that and be happy.
Don't pick up any unnecessary fight just learn from this( whatever u can) and take solace in the fact that your thread has achieved a lot ( even more than u might know). For one it has enabled u have a brief sense of people's comprehension skill and rationality among others. so you too have gotten one or two things I hope. Cheers

dare2differ:
We shouldn't make domestic abuse a gender thing. It can also be financial, emotional, verbal and psychological. For every promise a man makes not to hit a woman, a woman must also make the same promise and vice versa. What about we encourage people not to control others with any means of coercion?

I see your point and that's a nice view. Domestic Abuse is really a bad stuff esp when it fulfills all criteria of Abuse e.g it's repetitive.
seriously some of us (the men) do mess up big time. A family friend was discussing with my mom the other day about what the husband does to her and I was ashamed of and for the man. this abuse was both emotional, Financial( if it is really a thing), and some level of phyisico-spiritual. Believe me the man was immature and "not man enough" in all the sense there is. but this woman did a good job on him in letting him display his folly for all to see. she did not set him up to score cheap points he was just on the express way to Fvck up land. If it was another woman, she would get physical, ranting, cursing and stuff like that and it will be worse. so you see what I mean, A Lady should be calm and display her elegant wisdom while a useless "man" sets himself up for downfall. even his own family members castigate him on how he treats the wife.
We all can do better that's all I know.
Like how you address issues. you didn't lose your reasoning in a sea of Emotions

dare2differ:
I don't know the statistics in Nigeria but I am familiar with UK statistics. At least two women die every week from domestic abuse that mean domestic abuse from those close to them, most especially their male partners.

I ams ure it would be worse in Nigeria because it is some kind of an unwritten rule that a man is allowed to hit his wife but not too much.


So continue to analyse every situation, may it not be your turn!

Amen thank you for the prayer. we all need it.
like I have stated, I'm in no support of it. thanks for presenting those statistics. then I think definition of terms would come in handy here so that we aren't lumping different things together as one.
domestic Violence on one side hitting a woman on another.
I as a man I would eternally be ashamed should I hit my wife ( my personal principle) - this I believe is what qualifies as domestic Abuse right? I won't hit my wife. I made vows to love and protect my LADY( first step to prevent myself from such shame would be to get myself a LADY). that is a promise I have to keep beating her up at any provocation invalidates those vows. Keeping to your word is the principle of a man. please get me right. I have not supported domestic violence ( he is your wife - your pride and trouble you signed the contract deal with it). but what I am talking about is the erroneous belief that every woman can do as she please even to the state of being physical with a man and get away with it ( simply because she is a woman). the first rule is protect yourself first. you don't go rubbing petrol on your body and hoping that the fire would be nice and considerate enough not to burn you. A woman should behave like a Lady. my reference here is to the instance the guy I quoted gave as regards the situation in the banking hall... what the lady did was uncalled for. Kudos to the guy that he exercise restraint. Bravo!! but for a guy who didn't I won't join the band wagon that will shout " send him to the gallows" because the said woman or girl could have behaved as a lady and talk to the guy about her displeasure at his remarks...
Like someone said, Dead men don't explain ( something like that).
I have got a mom and I love her and it would kill me to see someone physically abuse my mother outside. But as have also not heard of it that my mother put herself in a risky situation of unladylike behavior. that's all I am saying.

Wealthgang:
People who usually rant "never lay hands on a woman no matter what" are those who end up doing it. Its not just by ranting it, u have to understand d real principle behind that statement. I know this from experience.

So why should u generally not lay hands on a woman? Simple! Cos women are generally perceived as weaker (physically) than men, hence are defenseless.
In order words, d real quip should be "never lay hands on a defenseless person (male or female)" instead of "never lay hands on a woman". The latter is by no means a moral absolute.

Saying that it is never justifiable under any circumstance whatsoever, to "lay hands on a woman" is d stupidest thing anyone can say.
As a martial arts student, I wouldn't fight with a lady (non-martial arts) any more than I wouldn't fight a 12yr-old boy or a disabled person. They're defenseless.

In d case where a lady is not defenseless n tries anything physical with u, by all means defend urself.
If d lady is defenseless but provokes u, by all means control urself no matter what.
If she's defenseless but still attacks u, by all means give her a dirty slap. It shud end dere, punches n kicks n headbutts not allowed.

I remember an incident that happnd in UBA bank uniport (which is usually crowded). A girl was shouting n cursing in d bank over her 5k which was wrongly deducted n d staff were trying 2 calm her down. Then a boy sitting elsewhere told her 2 calm down, that d money was just 5k na and would be refunded. This didn't go well with d gal cos b4 we knew it, she walked up to 2 boy & slapped him hard. As if that wasn't enough, she took off her slippers n slapped d boy again with it, to d dismay of evry1. She wanted 2 hit him again b4 a guy drew her away. D customers inside d bank were so angry n some were prompting d boy 2 give d gal a dirty slap n were swearing d gal would have died if it was them. The boy didn't react but just walkd outside.

What happnd afta, I dnt know.

If u were in his shoes, what wud u do?
If it was me, I won't hesitate 2 slap her back n front. Y have d guts 2 slap me in public? "Never lay hands on a woman" my ass. Wud also do same if it was a guy.
Some women don't hesitate 2 slap n attack men because they have that mentality an absolute law is guiding dem n they kw how 2 cry a river when a finger touches them. Bullshit!

As for wife-beating, men who do dat are goats n I wonder how women still go ahead 2 marry such men. One big cause of it is poverty n blockheadedness. U hardly c wealthy/enlightnd pple pummeling their wives.
Where I blame women 4 it is y they allow themselvs 2 be beaten continuously all in d name of luv or i-want-to-save-my-marriage

I am more of the school of thought that believe that the original saying was " don't lay your hands on a LADY". Some women practically beg for it. e.g getting physical with a man, locking up his shirt almost strangling him, slapping and kicking him and his only way of escape is to send one or two brain resetting slaps to the woman. So now u are going to blame him?
A lady should be a Lady and a man should be a Man by appreciating and respecting a lady.
I personally don't beat a lady never have I done that since I have come of age. I try to avoid the situation totally.
I Like what you have up there. Those screaming never beat a woman are just singing a popular mantra. I personally analyse every situation before I crucify a guy for beating a lady.

OMG

Awon knock out crew!!!
nice!

what fruit? where can I get it?

carlcar2012:
Is every thing OK?

what do you mean?

it's messed up seeing females throwing the word "bitch" anyhow at another female. classy!!
BTW I think she is pissed that she wasted 2 hours preparing for something that would have happened. if she didn't prepare for him and the guy later complains she is still going to get the stick now that she did and the guy didn't turn up she is still getting the stick! wow! it socks being a woman
her being a "bitch ","hoe" or whatever term applies here or not isn't my point. I doubt it was the first meeting between the two so can u really blame her?
To other ladies, it's just like you taking time to cook for a guy say 2 hrs and he come to tell you he is not hungry. You sure will be glad he wasted your time. now if you aren't happy and u show it then I guess you can be called a bitch then?
PS: I see it from the angle of the effort(time) not the element( sex, food, chat, call or whatever applies).
PEACE

if it was me that u forgot his birthday, you are safe. the odds are i'd forget my birthday myself (I actually do) So if you forget, life goes on. but it will now be madness if u pick offense when I forget yours.

I'll call the police at the school and go in to give them a reason to save someone from dying and arrest another for battering with intent to render invalid.

DrayZee:
I didn't generalize.
In my first post I made it clear this was for "typical Nigerian parents",though there may be few exceptions.
Read clearly and carefully.

you don mess up. U come ansa am. People like to dey talk rubbish too much.

donholy28:
No be u like d pix so?!!! or abi my eyes dey deceive me?

No oo no be him o. him sef hate the pix but him phone like am...
sharp eye chief.

nice I'm particularly impressed by the references to studies that u put...
I'm inclined to agree with 5&6. heard that a number of times esp the one about the French, really who hasn't?!!
Funny list though.

it's all right... I'll be back to read it.

my Gee!!!! correct guy

vizkiz:
ok, I will add obansanjo and tee billz to the list. Are you happy now?

Lol funny man... l like the way u have been dishing out the response so far

juhan:
u dont know suarez, The cannibal? Neymar?


Even my late grandpa knew suarez!

Girl where have u been? Welcome to the 21st century

don't mind her. I get her position but she exaggerated. you don't know suarez, Neymar? never heard of them? what planet has she been. she is exaggerating!

firstolalekan:
I don't want a full house wife. Full House wives to me have low self-esteem...

That's is not true sir. tho some situations may prove that to be true but I believe the contrary will be supported by most situations

layla129:
Vinshu hunnae, you see that? Its working!

he is just angry not depressed. Saying I have a small jiggy won't make me depressed just loss confidence in the bed department.
Depression na serious stuff o.

Vinshu:
Yeah my friend is working on a science project and she asked me so I'm asking here.

For example, you need to make a certain guy so sad that he would jump off a bridge what can be done as a lady to effect that?

if it's a science project / experiment I'll recommend chemical method- drugs. you see depression isn't something that has a switch it can't be done with manipulation and results will be achieved in good time. And the methods that will be used won't be likely humane and ethical.
But making someone consistently sad is the common pathway with a persistently low mood.
Mind you Depression is a clinical diagnosis and there are certain signs the person must display before you can say they are depressed. Depression is different from being sad most time(sure/ hope u know). Tell your friend if she wants to make someone depressed, she should be ready to dance with the devil (literally) . coz to do it by saying bad things to someone who isn't depressed initially, will take a lot of effort and time saying and doing 'wicked' stuffs.

that's why there is wig. she can wear it with grace.
Not at the bridge yet, when I get there I'll make a decision.

All I see is " would you rather have money or have money ? "

one has to be careful when answering this question.

seriously, is there still any competent non starving foreign coach out there that would want to work with Nigeria? those guys at the NFF are useless.

can a shadow be caught? there you go!!

OP don't teach me rubbish... No 10 is correct. Longman dictionary is your friend and help.
I also read somewhere up there that someone said "you can't ASK OF someone you can only ASK AFTER people and ask of things" what!!!! the two don't mean the same thing. ASK after is more of emotional question; you actually want to know how such individual is doing. When you ask for someone you want to know where they are.
OP nice try. you may have achieved an aim different from the one you planned for. Here we can see people "correcting " the right grammar with the wrong one. smh
Anyway folks grab a copy of the dictionary whenever you are confused.
what's worse than having bad info is not having any and the worst is teaching someone the wrong one at the expense of their correct knowledge. If you can't make my grammar better, pls don't make it worse.

Optimisticgondy:
This Happened In My Church Today


Pastor preached about tithing in church today, and after sermon, he asked all salary earners (private and public) to stand.

To my utmost perplexity, he (the Pastor) directed the Secretary to start writing their NAMES and their MONTHLY SALARIES respectively.

Will he start coercing them to pay tithes to him personally based on their monthly salaries or what? Is it compulsory for a Pastor to know his members' salaries? What does he want to do with it?
These are some of the questions that ran through my mind in church then. Till this moment, I seem not to know his intention until next week. I wonder what churches are turning to these days.

Does anyone have an idea of what he will likely do with their names and monthly salaries?

if true,that's just unnecessary no matter the seemingly good intention. Tithing is between u and God. It's God that will choose to bless when u pay and otherwise not the pastor.

honezly, the popular names are just okay for me. garri = grain o' fibres what's that?
Cassava flakes will do.