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This is the same flow1759 you all know coming with another rib cracker titled EMMANUEL OKOLI.

Read and Enjoy

DISCLAIMER
No part of this book should be copied, republished, televised without the writer's consent. Thank you.


You can reach the writer on eke_ugochukwupeter@yahoo.com, +2348032607611




Nobodys(f), sandra27(f), dayleke(m), BlackPikiN(m), adeola94(m), MsPweshy(f), stanjohn57, tosinjoe(m), schwerz(m), jaymichael(m), Emyo(m), justmenoni, Warlord3000(m), kwhiz(m), beycitee(m), TundE8, joey0358(m), kcreal(f), annexes, Itsalphaa(m), Coldfaya(m), pillzthadrugz(m), djteewhy, Mayor46(m), drsolob(m), donez(m), arizona145(m), Santi222(m), mosquitoNet(m), Senorita222(f), Alexgeneration(m), Cashkhiid(m), Leystra(m), Starboi10, NaijaExposed, seunblack(m), hyungwang(m), Olygal, Habybullah(m), rakumiii(m), Xtranoble, kimking(f), decoderdgenius, kingsleyd(m), PBeni(m), Reski(m), Kprice(m), ezekiel970(m), emmy99(m), YoungGame, Cashyguy(m), agidaizzy(m), Kingship001(m), Evablazze(m), geedup(m), Spoils(m), WCUB3(m), 10Billion(m), opeano(m), jydemyke(m), agentM(m), bykes(m), cally22, Hadeehart101(f), nnennaada1(f), ebubeoma(f), yindamola, macof(m), Stormisova(m), naziediamond(f), Activity77(m), Lollz(f), Olusharp(m), Ezeebube2(m), MemeInc(m), Mutaino7(m), nelxsantos(m), eunisam, Misolex(m), Olamilekan08(m), geogino(m), seankay(m), AmiableJay(m), ERF, ifeolad8, deji47, J0sh007, Pattey(m), Rajosh(m), Ifyx(m), adeswagsdmj(m), immortalvoices(m), 419nigga(m), DEllaluv(f), Sophiatabitha(f), tybobo75(m), Otamio, debayun(m), coonax(f), teetee92(m), CallMeFemi(m), Niyi12arsenal(m), underage(f), Ndkings1(m), kunlesehan(m), Piroskee(m), Daniel2802(m), Affable0709(m), MrTAnonymous(m), Xsenga(f), duffman(m), DisneyAngel(f), Swot26(m), kenneyyice(m), Eniqurl(f), olatunji390(m), modupeaderonke(f), Youngzicco(m), leonard509(m), segun544(m), oladistinct(m), Hackerjay(m), erniok(m), WorldGreatest1(m), niyosen, spicyuzo(m), Kingademos(m), Sheenor, kayojosephy(m), emmadejust(m), Jeanfortune(f), 1stimpression(f), Heymus(m), chinnygold, GodswillAJudins(m), Temmysexy1(f), Harrychocoberry(m), yungrashee(m), CharlieMaria(m), Omoalhaja7, Emmykul4love(m), MightyFortress, Donkunxex(m), drsolob2(m), Olansgee(m), Trypa(f), mbagideon(m), Rajy00(m), Rounakid(m), ritababe(f), Darus05(m), toykathy(f), Ramwab94(m), fr3do(m), estelleivie(f), hammedm44, CrazyScientist, JigsawKillah(m), letsbet(m), emmabest2000(m), EpicOracle(m), Sondy(f), lildamzel2(f), gnykelly(m), skinnybleed(m), Idrhas(m), armadeo(m), Zonacom(m), vera031(f), marz007(m), vickyozohu(f), missstella(f), wyzgrace(f), follyshade(f), Thugnificent(m), jayhaywhy(m), Kylez(m), ben1jazman(m), hayurmidey(m), scentmarlc(m), IndecentStar(m), ajumaxbabe(f), rhoseti1(m), Coolboi05(m), Skykid1208(m), hendrixxx(m), Ndukings92(m), lammy197(m), brize(m), olamydey(f), Profmaojo, Dovie1240(m), Hybrid01, chykmoni(m), Deejavu1(m), jibrinzulkiflu, highbeetohbadt, lekinz(m), mackzydon9(m), Abiagirl777(f), kingofpool, raficki87(m), Realgana(m), StormAngel(f), Qaisar1, princesssusan(f), Alphafrank, scofieldsimba(m), Seun(m), jditimiya, rachiks(f), generaliy07(m), Science4me(m), horpe132(m), Tgold1(m), yemi2plus(m), Therock5555(m), plainmirror(m), Nduki, 4kizo(m), fujirice, Larrylarex(m), adegwurulez(m), slimfredo(m), Mynd44, Idowuogbo(f), texanomaly(f), SexyDuby(f), Rapmaestro(m), Ishilove, kelvin1191(m), vision2050, Nduking92(m), YOUNGKAHUNA, opeoluwa2(f), alfablondy, ifyalways(f), fittty(m), FoxyRebirth(m), cdamsel(f), Tgirl4real(f), Odunnu, Rocktation(f), vivianc(f)


Make all of una show face, this one go totori una.


Still i Flow

HORLADSTAR:
IN EFE VOICE---

Flow flow mr 1759.
I don dey drink that brand since i was just 9.
I remember back then my guardian go tell me KAI.
That i am not yet a big GUY.
But i no dey concur cos guiness na my sure GUY.
Mr flow,I swear this ur story just dey thrill ME.
The tin dey make me high as if i drink henessy NI.
As i dey laugh one day i go fall inside GUTTER.
Sometime back,Na GOD save me i go jam in front TRAILER.
Now tell me who cause am na mr THRILLER.
Mr flow to say the truth i dey feel ur MELODY.
As u dey drop am d tin just flow like KEROSENE.
My high tension nigga,i dey ur back, no FEAR.
Any body wey wan try u, dem go just dey TEAR.

Flow baba shey make i no lie,u try no be small

Na man you be jor

THE END

Say no to drugs!
Say no to kidnapping!
Say no to rape!
Have one s'ex patner! Becuase AIDS is real!

And Last but not the least:
Be real to your friends!

Becuase NA MAN YOU BE

"Na man we all be" Ola reminded as all friends sat to drink palm wine at Umoh's.

"You! Man? Na woman you be jor!" Nnamdi corrected.

"Umoh abeg arrange me 404!" Ola ordered.

"You sabi order now abi? Shey na becuase them don release us for that prison nahim make u get mouth to order abi!" Ade pointed out.


30 minutes on.

"Hmmmmm! Who messs?" Nnamdi perceived.

"Nas! Na you!" Ogbonta was sure, he could tell the differences between a fart by Nas and that by Nnamdi. His nostrils was the litmus test.

Another 30 minutes of rotten egg smell.



"Flo why you no dey talk na?" Ola noticed.

"Why you just dey quiet?" Ogbonta asked.

"Guy i no well! I get headache!"

"Which kin headache?" Nnamdi was medical.

"Na HIV headache!" Flo answered.

"HI................ Kini?" yelled Ola.

"HIV, e be like say i don get HIV oooh!" Flo announced.

"HIV! How? Who give you?" Nnamdi's mouth was ajar.

"I no know where i catch am oh!" Flo was sweating, "i no know weda na those girls for my uncle place abi na that Fu-fu girl give me"

"Fufu girl? Which fufu girl?" Ola asked.

"Fu-fu you sister na!" Flo answered, "she been tell me say she don carry HIV"

"You say what? My sister?" Ola yelled.

"Yes na! I slept with her without raincoat last week, and when she fell sick this week, she told me it was HIV"

"How did you know it is HIV" Nnamdi was not smiling at all.

"Because she told me so" At cases as this, It was preferred one spoke English; it less the stress.

"Yeeeeh! I don die oooh!" Nnandi announced, "that mean say me sef don catch am ooh"

"You! You slept with my sister?" Ola clinged his fist.

"I didn't slept with your sister oh! It is she that slept with me" what difference does it make.

While Ola was still swallowing that news telling himself not to fight Nnamdi and Flo, suddenly Ade rasied his right hands up sobbing.

"Wetin happen Ade? Why you dey cry?" Ogbonta queried.

"I dey cry because.......... Because me i waya Fu-fu yesterday night"

"So you sef don catch the disease?" Ogbonta was shocked.

Soon Ogbonta too was sobbing.

"You, why you dey cry?" Ola questioned.

"I no dey cry ooh! I dey smile" Ogbonta faked smile.

"Why tears com dey comot for you eye?" Ola queried.

"Na tears of joy!" Ogbonta said.

"Tears of joy abi?" Ola fired, "you sef don waya my sister abi?"

"No ooh! I just dey cry because if Ade don catch HIV, me sef don catch am through the inject......"

"Inject wetin?" Ola needed to know.

"Injection wey we dey take put Coco for our body" He and Ade has been sharing the same C'ocaine stringe since they returned from jail.



Silence fell for a while until Ola broke the silence and said, "so Funke my sister give all of una HIV abi?"

"Yes ooh, as she dey sick since three days now, infact she call me 30 minutes ago say she dey hospital wey she wan do HIV test" Flo said, "i know say the test go dey positive"

"Na your papa go dey HIV positive!" Ola thought of cutting himself with Funke's blade while cutting his toes four days ago.



"Oga Flo pick your phone na. Your phone dey ring" Nas the seemingly HIV free one informed Flo.

"Na Funke dey call" he announced.

"Ehhheeen! Put am for loud speaker make we hear" Nmamdi ordered.

"Hello......."

"Hello Flo love!" Funke giggled, "i dey for hospital now, i don do the test, and the doctor say i no dey HIV positive"



Silence instantly crippled every soul .

"You dey HIV wetin?" Flo could percieve his heart roasting.

"I say the doctor say i no dey HIV positive, i dey negative"

"Negative? You dey HIV negative" Blind Ade had regained sight.

"Aaaaaaaaas! Aaaasshh! Thank God ooooh" They didn't allow Funke to pass the information completely before shouting victory.

"Hello! Hello! Hello! But the doctor say i get belle" Funke continued speaking not minding the shout of joy from the other end, "but no be you get the belle"

WHO GIVE FUNKE BELLE?

Kirgyakos:
Where flow go nah!
Abeg kom kill us wit laf.

Sorry my dear fans. I have been busy.

"Nkem i no know wetin i go do for this council wey my mama get ooh!" Nkem and Fu-fu sat outside gesting.

"Cancer! Not council"

"Either council or cancer, that one no change anything, my mama go soon die!"

"No worry, your mama no go die, she will live to declare the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living, say amen......" Nkem turned prophet.

"Amen......." Fu-fu responded, "wait ooh! When last you go see your brother Enadi for prison?"

"When last i go? E don tay ooh! Since the past 6 months na only two times i don go see am"

"Even sef i here say them go soon release all of them" Nkem informed.

"Eheeen! Who tell you?" Fu-fu smelled.

"Na for our salon na! I hear Dornu mama dey tell my madam say her husband don agree to go release them"

"Eheeen! Oluwa ese oooh!"





"Oya suck me dry!" Mrs. Damiana Daniels told Nas.

"Me? Suck you dry" Nas instantly recalled the last time such statement was made but by Flo.

"Help me use this foam soak this my wound so that e go go quick" Flo was wounded on his left ankle that day at the shop.

Soak sounded like suck.


"Okay! But........... "

"But wetin!" Flo cuts abruptly, "ju souck it!"

Soon Nas was smelling Flo's open sore already. Wait for it, he was about to lick the mango sorry orange

"So na me you want make i lick your wound abi?" he had licked.




"Ade see wound all round your body?" Nnamdi told Ade as they sat together yet lonely.

" No worry i know what to do!"

"Boda Ola mami is very sick, they say she have council!"

"Council? Wetin be council?" Ola was shocked; he thought his mum now owns a council.

"Council na! The doctor say she get council na!" Funke repeated.

"Okay! Cancer! Mama get cancer?" Ola's jaw dropped, "How? When? Who give am?"

"Boda i no know who give her oh!" Funke answered.




"Ola na me and you go chop that Amala wey your sister bring come ooh" Ogbonta booked.

After munching the plate of Amala with Ogbonta, Ola said, "my mama go soon die! She get b'reast cancer"

"What! How na?"

"She go soon die, my sister say na only 5 weeks she get to survive" Ola's eyes was clouded; it was about to rain.

"Ahaan! You wan cry? Ola! Na man be ooh!"

"Na man i be! Na man i be!" Ola tried holding back the tears.

"Ola no cry, Iya Funke no go die!" Ogbonta tapped Ola at the back.

"I don give Fu-fu all the money wey i don win for chakachaka since wey we come this prison" Ola murmured.

Fu-fu is no one else but Funke. Truth is she looks like Fufu the swallow when she makes up, she smells like it when she puts on her Ologbo perfume made in Mokola Ibadan.

Chakachaka is the prison pet-name for gambling. Soon Ola was the king of chakachaka in his cell.

"How much you give Fu-fu?" Ogbonta asked.

"I give her 15k! The 15k wey i give them this warders make them keep for me!"

"Nonesense! Na 15k go cure cancer?"

"But na wetin i get na!"




"Nnamdi help me ooh! Them go kill me oooh! The other cell mates was beating the living day light of Ade.

EmpresFIDEL:
OMG Nas is a crazy dude.... he cannot even understand anything . flow tanks for d update oh

Thank you for reading

July 1st 2015 saw Flo washing Deborah's, Chika's and Chinonye's clothes and un'dies.

"Uche wetin you dey do so?" Nas was astonished on seeing un'dies lying amongst the clothes he washed

"Wetin e look like say i dey do?" Flo responded, "i dey watch ball, champions league!! You wan know the scores"

"Flo so e don reach you like this?" Nas cried out, "to dey wash p'ant for this small girls"

"Guy wetin i dey do no cencern you!" He hide the un'dies, "ehen you say e get wetin you wan tell me, wetin be that?

"Guy wetin i wan tell you be say this your uncle wife dey temptation me ooh" He sat at the pavement beside Flo.

"Temptation you how?" Flo stopped washing abruptly.

"She want make i lick her Mango or else i go leave this house"

"Lick her mango? So she buy mango give you, you no gree lick? Why? Shey na ripe mango?" Flo was surprised.

"Make i lick her mango, shey i be licky-licky?" Nas returned, "i no mean that kin mango ooh, i mean the other mango"

"Eeeeeehe! Nas!" Flo yelled out.

"No dey shout!" Nas responded, "i never lick the mango na"

Just then Ten years old Nicole the last child of the house walked in with her notebook and pen.

"And who is licking who's mango?" She said.

"Lick? Me? I no lick ooh! She just told me to lick and i no lick ooh!" Nas confessed unknowingly..

"Who?" Nicole asked.

"Your Mother na, she....................." Flo covered Nas's mouth.

"So you guys just go about licking mummy's mango abi, i will tell her!"

"No ooh! Us did not lick oh!"

"If you like let Horse lick or let Cow lick, thats not why i am here, i am here because of my assignment!"

Mare hearing the word assignment, Flo's mind skipped. He recalled Nicole telling him one afternoon to spell hypothesis, and he spelt Hypotessy. He recalled multiplying 47 by 12 and deriving 14. He recalled the past tense of feed as fish.

"Nas help her do her assignment!" Flo cried with a loud voice.

"Uche! Na you brilliant pass me ooh, help her do the assignment" Nas also cried.

"Nas i did not finish secondary school, i stopped at primary 4" Flo the graduate of Industrial Chemistry said.

"I want brother Nas to help me with this assignment because i don't want the past tense of feed to be fish" Nicole made her choice. A perfect choice to her.

"Okay go ahead read the assignment!" Nas was crying deep down.

"Big is to small as Elephant is to what?"

"Elephant is to.........." Nas was thinking.

"Elephant is to Ele" He answered, "the small children of Elephant is Ele"

"Okay" Nicole had written the answer down, "i have written that one down, this is another question, it is maths; if Ade is 14 years old and his father is 45 years old, how old was Ade when his father was 35 years?"

"Ade!...............father?.................. Ade.......... Father!......." Like the answer to the question was in the nomenclature.

After solving gibberish on the sheet of paper Nicole handed to him he said, "That means Ade is older than his father, Ade senior him papa with 14 years"

"Yes that is the correct answer" Beans and vegetable had turned Flo into a piece of vegetable education-wise.

Educated by the streets.

"Ola you dey lose this game ooh!" Ogbonta said the obvious

"I know! But na man i be!"

"Na man you be abi?" Dipo responded, "me na woman i be? I go win you scara!"

"Who is Olaniyi Olanipekun!" One of the jailers announced.

"Na man you be! Na man you be! Na man you be!!" Ola's prison mates hailed him like he was headed to be crowned Mr. Nigeria.

"Na me sir!" Ola responded, "na man i be!"

"Your sister wants to see you in the waiting room!"

"Me? Sister? I get sister?"

"U'ndies na type of exercise, anytime wey this Chika baf finish she dey like to do exercise, so na me be her exercise master" Flo said, "na why i no dey come out early, you no see say i dey always sweat come out of her room?"

"You know why i like you Uche?" Nas said.

"Why?"

"Na becuase you like to dey lie!" Nas continued.

"Uncle Uche!" Doris called from her room, "come and help me with my TV remote!"

"Hahaha! This girl funny ooh! She no even get Television for her room she dey talk of remote" Nas laghed.

"You don't even know modern technology! You dont know that without TV you can watch TV!" What kind of TV is the question.

Flo had TV and Underest to attend to at the same time.

"I go tell them say i go chop this razor blade and if i slap your head plenty razor blade go dey comot for your mouth"

"See as we go do am, ....................." Ade whispered gibberish to his friend's ear as they peed in the toilet alone. Or so i thought.


Meanwhile.......

"So naso you dey roll your own dice? You no even sabi play game, i go just win you rasa rasa" Ola tossed his first dice.

"Ola play game! You too dey talk! Wetin be rasa rasa? Focus and win dis game" Ogbonta said to Ola.

"Wait make i stand up so i go play well win dis Dipo wey think say him sabi play" Dipo vs Ola could be likened to Brazil vs Argentina in football.

"I notice say anytime wey Ola stand up com dey shake him n'yash him go win the game!" Kelly noticed Ola was Ukwulicious.

"Wetin carry your eyes go my n'yash? Abi you be gay? I dey warn you Kelly ooh! Every time you go dey look my n'yash, if extra hole enter my n'yash ehhhn, i go know say na you put am.

"Eeeeeheeen! Lost son no talk that thing here! Nobody for this cell be gay, we no dey put hole for n'yash you hear?" True to the commander's word, there was no gay present in cell 2. Just one lost son and no gay.

But in cell 3 there was James. Mavin "gay" James.

"Ade you be fine boy! You shouldn't be doing all this magic you are doing" James kissed the back of Ade's neck.

"How e go be na! If you wan make me and you do this thing you need to show working oooh" Ade turned to see the one that was wooing him while he peed in the toilet.

James really showed not just working but he derived equations.

"Okay i go dey give you 5k per sugar baby" James returned.

"Sugar cane? Wetin be sugar cane?"

Now that short update was intentional not a mistake

"Uncle Uche help me get my u'ndies in my room!" Chika spoke from the bathroom.

"Okay! I will get it right away!" Flo responded from the living room where and Nas was watching TV.

"Uche abeg wetin be underest wey this girl dey always tell you make you bring for her room, and when you enter the room you no dey come out again"

"Un'dies na................. Na................na ........ Na

jerrythafinisher:
flow baba.. I dey feel this tory o

Thank you

"My friend continue your frog jump!" The 2IC yelled at Ola.

"I go do am ooh! I go do am!" Ola was sweating profusely.

"2IC no be frog jump him dey do here ooh, na mess jump!" One cell mate by the name Dipo said.

"Eeheen! So you get mind dey mess abi?" 2IC questioned.

"2IC him don mess sotey him trouser don tear!" Another cell mate Kelly informed.

"As you no gree pay for your entrance money, naso you go dey do frog jump every day until you pay"

"But i no be frog na!" Ola mumured.

"See you! You no be frog? Your eye be like frog eye sef" Ola's eye was growing bigger all thanks to spoilt rice the eye fertilizer.

All the food brought by Ogbonta's coke studio sales person Timo to serve Ogbonta and Ola was always spoilt and the other day the cell commander peed on their rice. Jollof rice and urine was tasty to hungry Ola; maybe that was the fertilizer that grew his eyes bigger. Or so i thought.



"Ogbonta you go help me pay my entrance money ooh, as my people don abandon me here" Ola for the first time called Ogbonta by his first name - Ogbonta had warned Ola to desist from calling him Ogbo baba save the commander and his 2IC asked him to do frog jump for bearing "baba".

Flashback...

"Baba of where sef?" The commander had on Ogbonta's first day in cell gave him a resounding dirty slap; an echoey dirty slap rather for the suffix "Baba".

"I........ I......... I........ Say........ Say.......... Say........ Baba of where?" The echoe was morbid; like Ogbonta was diabetic at that moment; his tongue tasted sugar.

"Him be baba for the boys! Baba for the boys!" Ola almost sang out Umoh's favourite song.

"I be baba..........." Ogbonta lost his voice.

"Baba for where?" 2IC yelled.

"Baba for............ Babalawo..... Baba for lawo"






"I go help you pay the entrance money! I don already tell Timo say make him bring 1k if him dey bring food come tomorrow!"

"You be correct! That is why you be my guy!"






"King maker! King maker!" Ade's cell mate hailed

"Thats my name! I am Ade the king maker!"

"See eehn! I go do ehhen, this my cousin Nnamdi go s'hit 50 naira note" He promise.

"Eheerrn! Do it and i will give you one thousand naira" The cell commander promised.

"Okay! Nnamdi comot your boxers and s'hit the money" Ade said after incanting in Yoruba.

"See this one n'yash! E be like lizard skin!" Niyi one funny character in cell 3 laughed.

"You dey mad, na your n'yash be like lizard skin!" Nnamdi cursed.

Out of the lizard skin came a clean 50 Naira note.

"Come and see America wonder!" The 2IC's mouth was ajar.

Ade's cell was indeed an atmosphere of not just signs and wonders but of miracles.The other day everyone in the cell touched Nnamdi b'alls to confirm it was two, but on Ade's incantation Nnamdi lost one ball.

"How e take happen?" The 2IC was surprised.

The more they looked the less they saw. Ade's Abrakadabra was really working on his cell mates and it earned he and Nnamdi not just respect but money and food - more nutricious food.





"Uncle Uche i have finished eating come and pack the plates" Deborah said to Flo.

"Falling hand! Oga Flo so you wan pack this small girl plate wey she take chop?" Nas was disgusted.

Flo knew what he was after.

"Ola you dey smell s'hit s'hit oooh!" The police pick up moved with all kidnappers handcuffed behind manned by two armed policemen.





"So where do you want to stay now that your business is packed up?" Now Flo was at his Uncles place at Bori cantonment Port Harcourt.

"Uncle Dave i was thinking if i can stay with you!" Flo made known his intentions after narrating his ordeals - he skillfully lied.

His Uncle Dave was silent for seconds eyeballing his wife who eyeballed him back signifying a go.

"Well Uche you and your friend can stay for today until me and my wife give you feedback after our discussions tomorrow!" That sounded like a political promise to Flo.

"Okay sir! Thank you sir! We will maintain good behaviour throughout our stay here!" Flo was sure it meant a Yes.

"Come lemme take you and your friend to your room!" Damiana Uncle Daves wife offered.


"Nas this room fine oooh!" Flo commended.

"Oga Flo this your uncle wife fine ooh!" Nas commended too.

"Eeeehn! Nas! Nas!! Nas!! How many times i call you?"

"Oga Flo! Oga Flo! Oga Flo! How many times i call you?"

"Nas i dey wan you ooh! That my uncle na RSM of this barracks! You see eeehn if you no wan sleep for guardroom comot your eyes for that him wife and for those him children! I dey wan you ooh!" Flo warned.

A warning Nas did not heed.


"Oga Flo this your uncle get plenty girls ooh, six girls!"

"Naso na! This my uncle na Tu baba na!" #No pun intended, respect to Tuface Idibia#

"Eheen! You mean am?"

"Yes na! Him born all this pikin from different women! Three different women!" Flo said.

"Mehn! And them him daughters na fine babes ooh!" Nas confessed.



"But Oga Flo..............."

"Heeeeeeeh! Nas i don tell you no dey call me Flo for this house wey we come so, my name is Uchenna! Uche for short!" Flo informed.

"Okay Uche! Oga Uche!" Nas corrected.

"No Oga! Just Uche!"

"Okay Uche you been tell me say e get wetin you go tell me about why we close shop run leave Rumuigbo"

"Eheeen! Cooohooo!" Flo coughed, "the thing wey i wan tell you be say police don arrest them Ogbo baba!

"Eheeen! How na?" Nas mouth was ajar.

"That police siren wey dey blow that time wey motor carry us dey comot from Rumuigbo na for our house e dey go!" Flo said, "e dey go arrest all of them"

"But how na? Who tell them the police say Dornu wey them napkin dey there?" Nas asked.

"Napkin?" Flo wasn't surprised.

"Sorry, Kidnap!" Nas corrected himself.

Flo took a deep breath and said; "Na me!"

"You! Why?" Nas was shocked, "why will you dideth such a thing?"

"Why won't i dideth such a thing? You no know say dem wan cheat me?"

"How? How cheateth thou?" Nas was grammatical.

"See, the chicken lap wey i help them hire, them no give me complete money"

"Even at that?"

"Them think say i cheat them for the price to hire the chicken lap"

"Oga Flo! Sorry, Uche thats not enough reason to cheat on them and betrayeth them na!" Nas spoke King James version of English language.

"Guy why you dey talk like this? You no wan rich? See that girl Dornu promise me 500k if i go tell him papa where dem keep him daughter"

"But oga thats not a goodeth reason to betrayeth you bestest friends" Maybe Okro soup and Hollandia yoghurt - what Nas had for breakfast that morning changes one's tongue to King James, our maybe not.

"Apart from the 500k she give me fresh Kpomoh chop join sef" Flo informed Nas.

"Oga!" Nas tapped his boss on his shoulder, "so na ordinary Kpomoh 50 Naira make you deny your friend? You bad pass Judas and Carrot for bible ooh!"

"Hahaha! Nas! Which one be Judas and Carrot again na?" Flo laughed out loud.

"You no know say Judas for Bible get one company wey dey sell carrot before him com become disciple of Jesus?" Shocking revelation.

"Hahahaha!" Flo continued laughing.

"Oooooh God! Stop to dey laugh and tell me which Kpomo Dornu give you, na Cow skin abi na Goat skin?"

"Hahahahahahaha!"







"Who is Adewale Ayuba?" #Respect to Mr. Johnson#

"a.k.a the King maker, thats me!" Ade answered.

"Okay constable you will take him to cell 3" One police officer professed.

"Who is Ogbonta Chinwo?"

"It is me!" Ogbonta answered with a frown.

"You will be in cell 2"

"Who is Nnamdi Kalu?" #Respect# #One Nigeria# #Nigeria must better# #Splitting won't solve the problem#

"O wu mua!" Nnamdi answered.

"You will be in cell 3" The police officer said.

The police officer smiled for some seconds before announcing Ola's hotel room number.

"Why this wan dey laugh?" Ola wondered.

"Who is Olaniyi Olanipekun?"

"Emi ni!"

"You will be in cell 2!"

cyber5:
Flow
Flow
Flow



Tupaliko C.E.O





I dey flow with you jare

You remember when you dey help that girl shey na linda for man wey dey reason repair socket, you come see G-string dey compare am with catapult.


Lol


She ask you wetin u dey call catapult, you reply say na the name of the socket wey u wan buy.



Thanks to you i never forget the name ' Wetsoul ' i still do am this afternoon


lol

Often times when i am less busy, i go back to read my stories, even me that wrote them, they crack me up.

prisiliveth:
Na man u be,baba flow!!!

Na man we all be!

EmpresFIDEL:
pls update oh... tanks for d previous update

There you go!

"But guy you be goat ooh, how you go sell gold, the money wey you take sell am you no bring am come back!" Day six of Dornu's kidnap.

Guys were really on hideout; they all passed every night in Flo's spacious hideout room for the fear of God knows what aside Nnamdi that always sneaked into his room on returning from work everyday - He stopped talking to neighbours since the kidnap.

"Na you be Goat! You no know say them drug me! I swear them drug me"

"Who drug you? When dem go say make u dey come coke studio come take Egusi you no gree" Egusi was another name for coke.

"Guys shebi Nnamdi say him go buy us more shaks if him dey com this morning?" Ade reminded.

"Buy you more shaks? The one wey you drink yesterday night make you wan jonz for where my girl dey abi?" Ogbonta cautioned.

"I no do anything na, as your babe Dornu say she no well say she no fit baf, nahim i volunteer to baf her na"

"Chief bafer!! So na from n'yash dem dey start to baf person abi?" Ogbonta was furious.

"No ooh! Na she say her n'yash dey pain her say make i help her massage am na!"

"Chief massager! Na person babe n'yash you wan massage"


"Guy i hear say them police dey com Baba street dey look for us!"

"Eheen! Make them dey look for us na! Them no fit know say na here we dey" Ola said, "abeg bring shak make we shak jor!"



Meanwhile at the restaurant;

"Oga Flo why we dey pack na? Shey we no dey do business again?" Nas was surprised.

"Nas! Nas! Nas!! How many times i call you?" Flo was pissed.

"Oga! Oga! Oga!! How many times i answer you?" Nas so hated such questions.


"Oga wait for me make i finish to lock the shop!"

"Do quick!" Flo signaled from the Volk wagen car waiting.

"Wahun! Waaaaaa! Wahun! Waaaaaaahun!" Flo could hear police siren from market junction.

"Guy abeg drive this motor fast, we need to leave this Rumuigbo fast!" He said to the driver.

"Oga Flo wetin dey happen? Why we dey leave Rumuigbo?" Nas curiouly asked.

"Guy when we reach where we dey go you know why we dey leave" Flo answered.

"But oga i wan s'hit ooh! Heavy s'hit dey catch me"

"Nas you be big f'ool i don talk am! I dey tell you say town dey on fire you say you wan s'hit! Oya come down go s'hit na! Abi you wan s'hit inside this motor?"






"S'hit for my mouth na!" Ade said to Ola, "Abi you no know where toilet dey?"

Ola had barely shut the toilet door when;

"Toooookpooom! Tomooooooop!" Gun shot everywhere.

"Wetin be that? Na Knockout abi?" Ola wished "Yes" was the response

"No ooh! Na gun ooh!" Ogbonta could tell.

"Ghoooooog! Gvoooooh! Gbooooooh!" Ola's spirit left his body.

"Na Police oh! Dem don surround us!" Nnamdi saw from the window view.

"Gtooooooom! Gbotoooooooom! Gpaaaaaa! The gun shot was alphabetical and closer too.

Ola instantly slipped and stamped his face on the opened toilet sit; submerging his face on holy water- unflushed p'oo water.

"We are doomed!" Ade was on Dornu's a'rse. Her big a'rse was his Mouka foam and he was reasoning fine albeit the rest us under pressure except Ola who was under-water bubbling.

"Gbooooar! Gbooooooar! Gboooar!" We know you are there! Open the door!"

"Ogbo baba! Go open the door na!" Nnamdi mumured.

"You why you no go?"

"Open this door! You have been surrounded! You will all die!" One half baked police officer announced.

"You will all die die die die die die die!" Echoed in Ola's head as he chewed Vanilla favoured bubble gum and swallowed.

"We and breaking in in 30 seconds if you don't open!" Ola was now chewing Strawberry flavoured chewing gum.

Precial419:
Bros u fit make person crase o.

Thats my job!

Kimkardashain:
Flow1759 u don kee me, i don laf tire

Kimkardashain damn! You are pretty!

The last update was dedicated to you

Kimkadashain dey read my story oooh!

I sight her