₦airaland Forum

[quote author=app_lord]Sheke keeper is not the only culprit here

A decent, box-box, visionary defensive midfielders (not ramires that likes to run through 5 players)

with the ability to transit the ball from the defenders and supply the offensive trio in record time.

Not forgeting full-backs that can actually attack and give mazacar depth.[/quote]DM definitely needed that cam combine the possession game of Mikel with the speed and energy of Ramires.

We have all the fullbacks we need. If the team plays in the opponent half, they can do that. It all depends on team set up. All we need is a striker and two DMs that can cover the fullbacks if they commit forward and that can control possession also.

debosky: Didn't watch the game, so I can't comment much on it - all I've heard is that Lampard started, Paulinho neutralised Mata, Cassio made a trio of fine saves and Torres missed the best chance on the night and had a goal chalked off for offside.

Maybe Torres was responsible for Paulinho's performance, Cahill's stoopidity or for THREE Chelski defenders on the line being unable to stop a Hamburg reject Peruvian striker's attempt on goal.

TORRES should be responsible for all these basic skills of footie:

Ibime: Apparently Vertical Passes is the only coach that can teach Torres how to trap the ball.

Vertical Passes can teach Torres to stop dribbling himself.

VP can teach Torres to hold the ball up

VP can teach Torres to keep his balance and stop dancing ballet on ice

VP can teach Torres to exert some physical presence

VP would teach Torres how to attack crosses

VP would teach Torres how to play football. . . .basically. . . cos that boy is a horrendous footballer.

First off, Torres FC put all their striking eggs in Torres basket by failing to sign any striker and chasing away his competition. They are still chasing away Sturridge to this day by refusing him a fair crack. Even against Monterrey, they rather push Moses upfront for the last 15 minutes than give Studge a run cos they know Studge might disgrace Torres. Chelsea land in London on Tuesday afternoon. Don't be surprised to see Sturridge on the bench for 90 mins against Leeds on Wednesday regardless. They don't even want to give Torres some rest cos they don't want his competition to put pressure on him. All the striker eggs have been firmly in Torres basket from start of season.

Secondly, they hired manager nobody wants or rates because he knows Torres. More eggs in Torres basket. The manager eggs are now in his basket.

As if that's not bad enough, they've now put the remaining eggs in Torres "tactical basket" by making them play a certain foolish tactical way to create vertical passes or "switchback". Since the fat Spanish Waiter came in all he keeps infuriatingly talking about is how the others "have to do more for Torres and play vertical passes for him". As if Torres is Chelsea end goal rather than maximising our chances of winning. The players must be spitting feathers at such foolish talk from FSW. The result of this is that Chelsea will struggle to create chances against any solid deep sitting team. Man City, Fulham, West Ham and Corinthians can attest to that. It is extremely difficult to "put Torres in space with a vertical pass" if the opposition sit back in their half. Meanwhile the creative players are so deep, they can barely score themselves. Tactical eggs now surrendered fully to Torres basket.

All the eggs have been put in Torres basket now. There are no more eggs left. We are now out of 4 competitions some of which a better striker would have helped.

Torres FC should keep putting eggs in Torres basket. He will continue rewarding them with failure.

We real fans of Chelsea FC will only get respite when the CANCER in the club cops an injury or better yet breaks his leg. Make I go consult my dibia on the issue.

[quote author=Intrepid!]Nigerian Navy chopper with bigwigs na im Timi Dakolo wey nobody sabi dey claim say e suppose enter. Dem suppose give that modafoka slap for trying to attain some measure of popularity with this disaster. RIP to the dead. The people that caused this crash know themselves.[/quote]This your yarns sef no follow.

Timi is heavily patronised by Ijaw politicians like Alaibe, Douglas, Azazi etc and is often found performing at their functions and well paid to do so. Why can't he ride helicopter with those who enjoy his performances?

dayokanu: or were the vertical passes lacking?

From reports I've been reading, Chelsea need to sack Benitez and hire this new coach called Mr Vertical Passes.

Apparently Vertical Passes is the only coach that can teach Torres how to trap the ball.

Vertical Passes can teach Torres to stop dribbling himself.

VP can teach Torres to hold the ball up

VP can teach Torres to keep his balance and stop dancing ballet on ice

VP is also a psychologist that can give him confidence.

VP can teach Torres to exert some physical presence

VP would teach Torres how to attack crosses

VP would teach Torres how to play football. . . .basically. . . cos that boy is a horrendous footballer.

Simple recommendation - VP is the manager for the Torres FC project.

4llerbuntu: Pls why are u all on torres's back? He is just one.of eleven jare.

Besides he is d best striker in d world tm coogar. Just chill.

Let coogar and nateevs come.and see all dis.tinz u pple r saying. They will show u how.chelsea did not create any tap in for torres like they create tap in for van persie and rooney.

All dose pple, dont they know they are supposed to create tap ins for Torres? Useleas midfielders.

Please let's not talk about 11 players.

The Torres FC project dictates that the others sit behind and try to find vertical passes to put him through. The manager they brought in to design Torres FC project has put his teammates in their straitjackets so if they don't create its because they're too far from the goal.

If they play higher and closer to the goal, Torres FC would tell us they are playing too much football rather than sitting back and giving first-time vertical balls to Torres. So let Torres answer his own flop whilst the rest continue to play to their instruction as given to them by Torres FC.

mufasa: ACL loun loun, that's the end of the season for him.

Career ending one would be preferable so insurance can at least cover his wages, rather than the £90m black hole he currently represents in terms of transfer and wages.

I was hoping the weakling had done his ACL when he went down in the second half.

Thank God we weren't relying on the weakling last season. At least those trophies are in the bag.

....

. . .

I dey laugh o! How is the Torres FC project going?

We went from a team who create 10 chances or so per match. . . to a team who sits £30m creative talent behind the halfway line so they can play "vertical passes" for Torres and create 2 or 3 chances per match.

we've gone from having 4 consistent threats on goal (MaZaCar and Torres) to putting all our eggs in the basket of one threat who is the worst of the four.

Some ninjas claiming Eldorado against the likes of Nordsjaelland and Monterrey, forgetting that style of play cannot break down deep sitting teams effectively. To break down a team like Corinthians, you either need players who are physically dominant, or you need the MaZaCars to play closer to their goal and to be moving about and dragging them all over the place to disorganise them.

The shekpe keeper cannot control the ball, cannot pass the ball, cannot hold the ball up, dribbles himself all the time like a baby giraffe on unstable legs, has no physical threat and cannot keep shape, so lets play "switchback" and fit our creative talents into a role where £5m players from Corinthians become better than them at what they are asked to do. All because we dont have a striker or a defensive midfield that can allow them to play what we bought them to play.

Lemme repeat myself once again. . . The shekpe-keeper is an extremely poor player.

I hope boys wont start lauding the Torres FC project against Leeds in Capital One Cup. . . my opinion has not changed. . .

Ibime: What wont we hear from these troglodytes.

"We spent two years telling you Torres is an extremely limited player who only thrive on vertical passes"

Clap for yourself. Exactly why that guy is rubbish.

Although he wasn't so limited last year, they were busy telling us he's a better SHAPE KEEPER.

BTW, what happens in the tight matches where the opposition sit in their half giving you no space for "vertical passes"

Please get me striker than take short passes, long passes, passes in behind, in the air, that can control the ball with his back to defenders, and that can outmuscle niggas to score. Not these vertical niggas that these emotional guys who love the peroxide blond weakling more than their club are yarning shyte about.

So far as one is concerned, Nordsjaelland and Sunderland are as open as Ireland. It's the same way the weakling took golden boot without contributing anything substantial to Spain at Euros. He'll soon be flopping again when there's no space to play and these emotional ninjas will abandon him again, only to resurface when he scores hattrick against Blackpool or some other open side in FA Cup.

Please someone inform me when the Torres FC project is over.

ypzilanti: Call am and confirm for us if she's alive.

Seriously, wish her no bad. Our youth in the entertainment sector are some of the few Nigerians making it big strictly by hard work and good fortune.

It's not a she, it's a he. I just placed a call home and Donald (Timi) is alive. He was at the event but decided to travel by road. We thank God.

topeorekoy: A journalist friend just sent this to my BB, he said Ramsey Noah and Timi Dakola were on the plane. I hope this is not true. Someone shld confirm this

Guy don't play cos Timi Dakolo is a personal friend of mine.

kutchs: First it was Danbaba Suntai and now Patrick Yakowa all Christian governors in the moslem dominated north.

Why only Christians?
You may call me names but I think Jonathan should watch his back, perhaps that explains his visit to the RCCG crusade.

You wouldn't know because it is never reported in the papers.

There have been SEVERAL ATTEMPTS on Jonathan's life already, and members of his security team have already taken bullets defending his life.

That's what you call real ikebe, not all these implants we dey see these days. See as the ikebe merge enter the thighs.

U1: It's been one of those uneventful weeks when you make transfers that you wished you had not made. Suarez, what a bad decision he's been so far. Liverpool dey fall pesin hand sef.

Taraabt should save that situation for you. . .

ILLScripts: dem Federalz Got ma House-tapped/hopin dat I fall 4 d Mouse-trap,i Doubt-dat/

That's a Big L line. . .


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fNAkZF3him0

. . .



Soon as my text appear/ niggas know a vet is here/
I end careers/ thats why Im crowned the best this year/
So 'fruity' niggas better take extra care/
cos any attempt. . .to upset the 'apple' cart. . . will only vex his 'peers'!/

I carry guns, so beefing me is ill-advised/
My 9 milli leave you terrified/ whenever the trigger fly/
I gained weight. . .now ma trouser is a bigger size/
But I still tucked a 38. . . in my 30" waist. . . when I was a skinny guy!!/


Yahoo money keep me looking flyer that Ryan Air/
Ask my paddy for 'jungle'. . . I'm known for doing 419 in there/
So if there's money for guys to share. . .
them 'cats' better count every Naira there. . .
cos they know I'm the 'cheater'. . . that'll run away. . . with the 'lion' share!!/


It aint a scam. . . it's a scheme/ when I land on the scene/
And leave you feeling blue. . . when I put my hands on ya green/
Stuff the cash in ma jeans/ and flee as quick as I can/
before the Police comissioner land/ to put niggas in vans/
cos you g'on point your fingers and snitch to the man/
cos you known for singing to the cop. . .like Liverpool fans!/


. . . .

The patient dog gets the fattest bone!!!

With 3 bonus points, Sessegnon would even outscore Michigan for the week.

Making up 25+ points on all ya'll murderfockers tonight

Gangstas! No need for armband!

[quote author=A-40]Is Romeu done for the season? Hehehe don't phock with Mikel[/quote]With ACN coming up, a replacement must be found.

debosky: What if Roman has also said Mikel has to play (hence the new 5 year contract)and told Emenalo not to buy a DM? It's difficult to say too much about what exactly is going on - it appears to be the voice of Jacob (Roman) and the hand of Esau (Emenalo) to me.

The mad Russian knows nothing about footie except "Torres must play".

The slimeball impostor can do many things with this squad bar the Torres issue that the mad Russian will be none the wiser about.

Why is he sucking the mad Russian's deek so closely as to attempt to rid all strikers and leave wingers com strikers like Schurrle as Torres only competition?

Left to me, I would pop in a sub £10m striker like Wily Bony into ma squad that would carry the team when Torres inevitably flops. Roman would be none the wiser thinking such cheap striker is only back up.

Roman also has nothing to do with midfield issue. Mikel and Ramires are Emenalo's pet project. Ramires is his first signing and Mikel is his brother with red cap.

I don't pay attention to these emotional ninjas attempts to obfuscate Torres incompetence with stats or bogus yarns about what midfielders don't do for him.

My only prayer is for Torres to cop injury for one month and EVERY MAN AND HIS DOG (INCLUDING THE EMOTIONAL NINJAS) know that by the end of that one month, Torres woulda been completely showed up by his back up!!!

debosky: So it's no longer Emenalo's fault, it's the man upstairs.

If you don't like Roman's style, go get your own billions and buy him out of the club. Torres is here to stay so y'all better hope and pray he comes good.

I have always spread the blame evenly between the mad Russian and the slimeball impostor, however one cannot sack the owner but one can call for the sack of the incompetent TD!!

coogar: sturridge na striker? lolololol

Sturridge na striker, yet Sturridge has been disgracing Torres from day one, even from the right wing.

My point exactly.

These emotional niggas love having likes of Sturridge and Lukaku on the bench so they can easily dismiss them.

Despite the fact they know Sturridge would outgun Torres severely if given half a chance.

That's why I said "what would these emotional guys say if Wilfred Bony or Demba Ba was the one on the bench?".

What an excuse of a striker. One so poor, Emenalo was busy chasing Andre Schurrle (a winger) as his back up because it's already been decided by the man upstairs that Torres must play every game he so no point getting a pure no9 to compete with him cos they won't get a game. A striker who stinks every game up so bad, yet Sturridge would not be given a chance cos Roman must be proved right.

coogar: if demba ba/falcao move to chelsea, they won't do better than torres!

Yes of course, they would be waiting for only vertical ball innit?

Sturridge has already disgraced Torres severally talkless of dem guys.

I'm not sure whether Patrick Bamford would not do better sef.

Make una leave these emotional guys to dey yarn abeg.

These ninjas love making excuses for Torres to stay on pitch by dismissing Studge and Lukaku cos they are young and reh reh reh.

Fact is if real ninja like Wily Bony is the one competing with Torres, none of these emotional niggas could make excuse for Torres @zz not to be araldited permanently to the bench.

That's the level of striker Torres is. He's not even an also ran much less a Chelsea calibre striker.

How could someone claim Torres is a top striker yet the owner of his club has to fix it for him so that not even Sturridge is given chance to compete with him.

WE ALL KNOW STURRIDGE WOULD TAKE TORRES TO THE CLEANERS WITH THIS SAME TEAM, talkless of the aforementioned ninjas.

May the yarning and analysis continue. . . all I know is Torres aint got it no more!!

Only takes one bad week to crash

What won't we hear from these troglodytes.

"We spent two years telling you Torres is an extremely limited player who only thrive on vertical passes"

Clap for yourself. Exactly why that guy is rubbish.

Although he wasn't so limited last year, they were busy telling us he's a better SHAPE KEEPER.

BTW, what happens in the tight matches where the opposition sit in their half giving you no space for "vertical passes"

Please get me striker than take short passes, long passes, passes in behind, in the air, that can control the ball with his back to defenders, and that can outmuscle niggas to score. Not these vertical niggas that these emotional guys who love the peroxide blond weakling more than their club are yarning shyte about.

So far as one is concerned, Nordsjaelland and Sunderland are as open as Ireland. It's the same way the weakling took golden boot without contributing anything substantial to Spain at Euros. He'll soon be flopping again when there's no space to play and these emotional ninjas will abandon him again, only to resurface when he scores hattrick against Blackpool or some other open side in FA Cup.

We know those who contribute and those who get carried. All real Chelsea fans want the liability out the team cos they remember strikers who made key differences in the main games winning titles like "King of Wembley" and contributing in almost every big game Chelsea played not extremely limited weaklings whose lovers make excuse for two years straight to tell us how limited he is.

nateevs: Hehehe. I bet you are praying, wishing and hoping that Torres does pick up from here and go on a roll.
It's the only reason you are writing this at this moment.

I don't think we've witnessed any one celebrating yet. However, trust the spin doctor to not miss an opportunity "just in case".
And if it all turns out good, he can easily say "I change his mind".

You mean you are not celebrating yet after 2 years? What a joke of a statement.

I know a bad player when I see one. I'm not "hoping for him to go on a run", just hoping for Roman to change his mind so my club can move on and start hunting with real difference makers upfront.

#TorreswatchunderRafa - 2 good games in 5 (against minnows)

nateevs: Ah! They've run out of excuses. It's time to divert the attention to Nateevs.

Run out of excuses? Says the dude who ran out of excuses long ago. Some ninjas never learn from history.

How can one run out of excuses for a confirmed flop?

Another false dawn and another sparse opportunity for Nateevs to come out of hiding.

Watch the backslapping continue against Leeds and Ulsan Hyundai leading the musketeers to reel out their seasonal claim that Torres is back!!! . . . . . till the next flop!