₦airaland Forum

Takotsubo:
Everything my husband and I earn go to one bank account and I disburse and allocate the rest.

In recent months I have out earned him,it doesn't change anything,it's still entering the same account

When he's outearning me it's about 4-6x mine and yet there's never been any problems,same account again and I disburse.

Personally,we do not do head and tail,we are equal partners and I am happy and willing to provide 100% without batting an eyelid.

At home, decisions are taken jointly according to who is an expert in what.Each person does what they are good at and we help each other out.

Our children were made by us, our joint responsibility,I'm grateful he provided the sperm and I added my womb.. beautiful equation.
They were brought into the world with him looking on in pride..they worship him as he is the best dad any child could ever ask for.

This model is not for everyone but this is what makes us both happy.I like to work,I like to make decisions and I know that my opinions count 100%..I couldn't cope with anything less.

Another person may prefer the more traditional method and it's still okay.There's enough room in the world for all methods.

It may sound scary for people who like rigid roles ,but when you are with a person you know is putting in as much effort as you into making your relationship work,you become more selfless..yes you will hurt each other as you are human beings but you still work at it and do better.

Every relationship is unique, find what works for you.

If you approach your relationship with flexibility and throw away all forms of rigidity ,there will be loads of room to be happy.

There's not one size that fits all.

You are answering a question the OP didn't ask.
Read the post again

Katier00:
Okay now tell us the challenges you are having in the relationship then we can analyze better. Are you guys always fighting or arguing? What are those issues you guys can't agree on? What's your sex life with him? What are is potentials? Do you see him as a hustler or is he bossy? Do you always bully him because you earn better? Do you disrespect him or cling equality with him? You do take all your decisions alone because you think you can and afford to do so? Just tell us honestly and above all do you love him and do you police him? Or do you give him breathing space. Let me stop here

What has this interrogatory CID cum FBI and KGB work got to do with anything?

Are you afraid of the guy? I hope you took a screenshot of the text so you can ask him and if he denies it you can show him and then be ready to walk.Whatever he says that answer he gave to the friend is unexplainable.The reason for being in a relationship should be because he loves you or you are nice and caring etc .For a friend to ask why he hasn't left you means he has discussed you in a bad light and the friend expects the relationship to be over.

I see no other reason why the friend will be asking why he is still with you.Telling someone he is with you because you are rich and have a good job is his reason for being with you.That is exactly what he thinks about you.Dont allow him spin this and call it something else.Your hunch is right.Leave him fast.This is God giving you an expo. Run.

There is a foolish woman out there hoping he leaves his wife so she can move in.
Some women are that stupeed

If police comes to take the monster away this same woman will be crying and telling them to leave him .
Some never learn.You can be very sure that a man this brazen has done this several times.
Some of the women reading this thread are living with such monsters in the name of marriage and praying against strange women

Israflor:
You are angry because your husband talks to another woman, what if he brings it to matrimonial home what would she have done? That is stupidity in its entirety.

Are you mad?

This is why I love our Igbo culture
If you dont pay any bride price ,you have no claim to any babies from any ikwokirikwo.
End of story.You wont even dare

And so?

Exc2000:
so much ... when Lagos - Abeokuta - Ibadan Standard guage start working, my family real estates and lands would be worth millions more as they seat strategically to one of the famous train station to be built with malls

as for begging we all saw their names and know they are from poverty capital of Southern Nigeria

Yes
We saw you all over Lagos streets at lockdown robbing at broad daylight.
Only in sw
Umu tifnubu.Other regions did lockdown in peace but yours was an opportunity to unleash your regional almajiri on innocent people
I ask again what has leadership benefited you?

If rats can invade aso rock and unseat a president and monkeys can swallow billions why not

Exc2000:
Same way Abba Kyari took a developmental loan and favour Northeast, excluding Southeasth, that's how Professor Agboola would also favour his own people while wailers wail of marginalization and pay the loan

Yet 99% of beggars on nairaland and agbero killers are from your end while 99.999% almajiris are from north .so what exactly has leadership done to benefit you or your family. Tell us

Exc2000:
only an ibo person believes all you just typed



New chief of staff Yoruba man

Yoruba amaka!!

Professor Agboola amaka!!

Ndi Marginalized Ajoka

I dont think you've seen the new thread
Rejoicing over nonsense.How does Gambari of jamboree change your current economic situation?
When we log off no be u go look for garri soak?Lazy yoots

As*hole rock is empty
Bubu is no more
Osibaba has covid and held hostage
Buratai has escaped
Aisha's camp fighting with the other camps no cohesion.
There is no president what they have is a phantom called presidency that speaks

Honor10:
Buhari has disappointed wailers again. E appointed Yoruba Muslim instead of hausa-fulani, they were expecting.

Wailers right now

How old are you
Aren't you ashamed that at your age those men were already in the corridors of power and have refused to leave.
Continue being an online nuisance collecting 3k to post rubbish online

Poverty is bad
They should provide a safe, discreet and easy adoption route for these unwanted pregnancies.Surrogacy happens in civilized places and money changes hands.its not called selling.
It's not everyone that gets pregnant that wants the baby.
The man she slept with absconded and nobody arrested him and she also wants out. I hate the criminalization of these young ladies .

Kaamisha:
Climatology100 when did you have sex and when was the baby born?
And she built a house in your name? Who does that?

He will soon decide to claim the house
Nwachinemere

sanesta:
Igbowoman don cut rope

Imagine
I wish I could reach into my phone and touch him

laivwire:
Op, Permit to say you're heartless.

You've disowned the lady all this while and now you're crying tears to blood to get her back. A child you didn't pay ante natal clinic for, a child you never gave your support to during pregnancy or after delivery. A child you have no hand in raising for the first 5 years of her life. Who are you to then claim responsibility for the child? What gives you the right? How are you sure she's your child?

I guess you haven't heard of sperm donors before or you haven't heard of men who marry single mothers with no condition.

All these issues will disappear once that lady opens up to her husband (before they married or even now). If she truly is a good wife and he enjoys that marriage. He'll claim that child.

That lady struggled hard to build a sane life for herself even if the face of your abandonment and emotional torture. Don't go and mess up her life again.

I blame her for even giving you audience. Take it to court or wherever and with this story, you'll even beg severally to have custody on weekends alone.

Continue with your life and let her be. It's not like there's no other woman or children you can have besides them.
I don't even know of you'll be able to take care of the child if you gain custody. Let her be abeg. Of you're well to do, your child will come looking for you when she's 18. That's even if she chooses to identify with you then

Thank you. Its only in a zoo that a random man who never paid shishi for a pregnancy or the child would dream of custody when the mother of the baby is still alive.
He slept with her and so what?
He wants to go and kidnap the poor child from her family and ruin peoples lives for his selfish reasons.
Why the lady is still communicating with him beats me

Climatology100:
I will be a very wicked fellow if I ruin her marriage, she's a very good woman so my intentions to claim the daughter will be mutual.
I just don't want a situation whereby in the future the girl will think I abandon her.
There was a time I traveled down south and I called her to meet but she plainly told me she can't that she's scared that we may be entangle sexually so I believe she's weak when it come to her setting her eyes on me despite assuring her nothing of such will happen as I'm in a commited relationship.
So seeing her now is kind of complex.

Stop stalking another man's wife.Go find your own woman and leave her alone

Climatology100:
I created a new moniker just to conceal my identity as I'm very frequent on travel and Autos sections.
I'm worried and I need advice on the next step to take.
I dated my ex right from our secondary school days, I was in JS3 while she was in JS2 and our relationship span till I finished my studies in university level though she couldn't proceed to the Uni as she insisted on doing business, she was so successful in her business that she built her own house before she attain the age of 26 albeit in my name(This I found out later while using her laptop as she later admit to it)
Things were moving good and steady between us, my parents and siblings know her as she often came over to my parents house, I met with his father once and the respect was mutual.
All this while, we never engage in sex until my third year in Uni, she's who she said she is, A virgin as I disflowered her then but things went side ways between us when I was elected as the president of one of the associations in school, she created this sense of imaginary rivals in every ladies she saw with me despite assuring her I'm not cheating on her.
In the year 2014,she became pregnant while I was in 400level though I told her I'm not ready for pregnancy as my head was full with so many things then, my CGPA dropped, having issues with my mother as everything was just not positive at that moment as I need to clear my head and pregnancy issue is just not what I need.Well, she told me she will keep it and take care of all the bills involved but I kept a distance from her and virtually from everyone back then.
My Dad eventually found out and he called and assured her of his support but she had a miscarriage when she was 7months into it, believe me as I was totally devastated when she called me around 1am to tell me as I and my Dad supported her in every ways possible, I stayed with her for 2weeks before I traveled back home(we lived in different state)
2months before I went for my service year, we had an unprotected sex and it was so emotional that I know there's more to it but I couldn't just concentrate when she asked me if I'm ready for marriage, I simply told her "I'm going for my service, I will be back for you" I never knew she read a lot of meanings to my statement.
I have one crazy idea of writing down the dates if I have sex with ladies(This I learnt from my Dad) during my service year, I lost contact with her as all efforts to trace her wasn't forthcoming but I received the shocker of my life when her sister posted her wedding pictures on Instagram( I haven't meet her as she too don't know how I look like as I don't do pictures, I have a phobia for taking shots with camera but we do communicate on phone)
The following month, another pictures on FB aibelt a new account by my ex thanking God for safe delivery of her baby girl,i quickly contacted her and we exchanged contacts but I asked her why the sudden development, her response was shocking, she told me "She can't wait for me as she's not educated but I'm, that I'm ladies man and she can't do rivals".
2years pass and I stumble on the baby girl pictures on FB and the resemblance is just out of the world, I quickly checked my diary and it correspond with the month she was born as in the date we had sex to her month of delivery, I contacted her to verify but she kept mute but on our consecutive discussions she always plead with me not to speak about it, she never deny nor agree to it.
I screenshots the pictures of the baby girl to my sister as I plan to travel down south to do DNA and if possible take responsibility of her but she told me to let her be that the right thing will be done at the right time by my ex.
Lately, I have being having a series of dreams as I keep seeing the girl trying to extend her hands to me but there's this barrier between us.
I called my ex yesterday to plead to her to tell me if I'm the father of the girl but she still repeat the same thing, pleading to me to let her go and not to talk about the girl, she even told me the girl is what keep her going emotionally everytime she think about me.
She's 5years now and everytime I see her pictures on FB or Instagram I always see myself in her.
Should I let her be without playing my role in her life or should I act with force to reclaim her?
Advice and Insults are allow.

Please get lost!!
Leave the woman alone to live her life
If you want a baby man up, go and pay bride price and marry a wife then get her pregnant.
The woman ought to block you and delete you completely from her life

Its public information for heaven's sake
Government activity is not Ogboni fraternity mr stupid governor

chloedogie:
Truth is Buhari has so many surprises in his sleeve. Wouldn't have ever thought someone from Kwara will be his chief of staff. That office is like the soul of the president. I am now believing the news I read few days back that a new cabal is cropping up.

To those who called president Buhari an ethnic bigot, bubu don surprise you oooo.
And to those who says he is too found of old people, baba don show say una dey correct cos the man na 75 years old.

My conclusion, he has a good biography and I pray he pledges his allegiance to both the president and the nation as a whole. May God help you do good and not be caught up in the politics and become useless AMEN.

And may he have the courage to tell the president whenever he is making a wrong decision or being advised to make a wrong decision.

And to those wishing Buhari dead, just pray you live as old as him o cos the man no dey die yet o and people that though they will outlive him are gone and some terribly sick now ooooooo. May we all live long and may God bless the federal republic of NIGERIA. AMEN.

Not Buhari at work

It is not bubu appointing.

Tasha7:
Hello, I am a black woman born and raised in North America and married to an Igbo man. We have been in a long distance relationship for the majority of our relationship. We got married almost 2 years ago while still long distance and he recently immigrated to Canada in Jan 2020 under the spousal sponsorship. He has a wonderful bond with my mother and sisters. (my father has passed). I have met his family and we get along very well....

I have turned to this forum with the hopes that someone would have more insight into what is going on. Thank you so much to anyone who has taken the time to read this very long post and respond. I truly appreciate it. Again, I attached photos, but scratched out names just in case.

Thank you,

Tasha

Where did you copy this beautiful tale from
We dont see any attached pictures

The IG looking to grease his palm.
Is it today police started carrying umbrella for people?
His men are begging like almajiri all over the place and he is not bothered.

This is confirmation that original bubu no dey.As* hole rock is empty

Crazeman03:
Hello Nairalanders, Hope you guys are staying Safe. Please don't mind my writing, I will make it short as possible.

I met this wonderful lady Last year and everything has been going good until 7 months ago when she told me she was Hiv+. That hit me hard but that didn't change anything, she was surprised I didnt react and opening up to me didn't scare me because I'm negative though we haven't had sex yet before the moment.

Now it has been 4 months we've been having unprotected sex. I'm not afraid of contracting the virus, as she keeps taking med and her viral load is low. I made sure before we went for test before having unprotected sex. Her CD4 count is above 750 and viral load is below 20, which makes hiv undetectable in her.

Now one night around 3months ago, she woke me up in the middle of the night to ask me, why do I love her knowing fully well about her status because she could not believe she will ever have a relationship with someone negative not even in this Nigeria by the way they stigmatize hiv+ people. I told her the reason and I'm not afraid hiv is not the worse or the baddest of diseases. There are more killer diseases than HIV and HIV is not a diseases but a virus. Only attack your immune system and its no longer a deadly virus.

The problem I have now is that whenever I imagine myself having it and how I will popping drugs everyday, make me kinda moody towards her, because I always keep telling her to always take her drugs. Last night she discovered she is pregnant and I'm just imagining things how everything will play out, I know when she will put to bed she won't be able to breastfeed. People will ask questions. I really need to tell someone in my family but I don't know who. My mom my react and the other person I trust is my younger sister.

On her own part, only her elder sister and brother knew she has the virus. And she had it since 2007.

I only need an advice if I need to tell any member of my family, looking to settle down with her this October.

You can still get HIV from a lady with undetectable viral load.Stop playing Russian roulette with your life
Ask them at the HIV counseling place they can teach you safe ways to get her pregnant while protecting yourself. Stop acting like a kid.
You must love yourself to love someone else.it doesnt look like you think much of yourself.
Regarding the breastfeeding etc you can opt not to have anyone come for omugwo
It's your choice
Keep her status private please.
Things happen ,people talk and tease
Keep that to yourself if u love this woman I beg you.
Make sure she gives birth in a hospital that can handle her situation. There are series of medications the baby must take to prevent her being positive.
She must coordinate with her center to keep her and baby safe.You stay safe
Wear a condom
Good luck

Uckroot:
Lmao. Winners chapel claimed they healed corona patients. Lmao

They are preparing for when business will open. More than 80% of covid patients have no symptoms.out of the 20% a large percentage recover .
Let them go and heal terminal cancers in our teaching hospitals and kidney failure patients on dialysis instead of claiming to heal people that would have recovered regardless.
Liars

Covid is showing these fake men of mammon for who they truly are.
Miracles are on lockdown now.
No more nollywood acts in their covens

I cant believe some of the responses you read here.
Na so hunger bad?

If you really think your president or VP saw the list you need to go do a brain scan.
Remember what happened when Yaradua was dead in the fridge before they revealed his death and Turai and cabal were running the show while kicking Jonathan to the side?
Same here

bigfrancis21:
He was right. It was necessary he made the video to prove his innocence, otherwise the lady could bring up false charges of domestic assault and women are really given the upper hand in American courts vs men.

He wasn't innocent on the video