₦airaland Forum

zheroes:
cant you contest? aren't you up to 18?

/

I can't. Dual citizenship wahala!

\

/
EITHER WAY, NIGERIA IS FVCKED!!!

Between a naive, clueless, kleptomaniac imbec.ile of a president

AND

An illiterate, senile, ex-dictator.

GOOD BYE NIGERIA!

All the good ones failed to contest and Nigerians are left with these two. SMH.

GEJ's monotonic speech acts like a tranquilizer; listening to GMB's speech is like watching a horror movie unfolding.

\

www.nairaland.com/attachments/2021621_cadetoffice_jpeg4d14aa05d49ecc6538ef15560a679f12




/
Interesting!
\

ChinemeOkpan:
Nonsense.

It is a national election and every Nigerian should vote

No single Nigerian voter should be disenfranchised

It is the responsibility of the government of the day to ensure that all Nigerians have a say on who becomes their leader after May 2015

President Dr Jonathan can start by going to the North East to assure them that they are still part of Nigeria

/
True.

They should enlist you as a field officer in NE.

\

/
They may be overwhelmed with too many places to bomb.

\

/
Currently challenging trend line support from 1999.

Confirmed break and close below will yield another $12 flush out.

Cave ne seded

Be careful about snap back. If it does, throw away all indicators and let it run because the primary goal will be to demolish as many stops as possible.

\

/
They sent OBJ to go and bring samples of GEJ hair. He used the wedding as an opportunity. To avoid any mistakes, he shaved well before going.
GEJ's hair is in a pot somewhere dancing shoki.

#conspiracy

\

fattybombom:
We don't need a soothsayer to tell us that APC are behind the activities of book haram.

/
Did you see what happened to those terrorists in France recently?

That's a country with leadership. The president did not sit around in denial neither did he resort to blaming imaginary enemies. He did what a leader ought to do--he took charge.

Presidency is not a blaming contest. Nigerians cannot even define themselves. To have them understand what leadership is all about will be engaging in a wild goose chase.

The same way BH members have been brainwashed about 72 virgins is the same way Christians in Nigeria have been reduced to zombies. And in all, it is the same way Nigerians have been brainwashed to accept mediocrity.

Like I always say, why even bother? Survival of the fittest prevails.

\

Islie:
http://www.premiumtimesng.com/news/headlines/174763-breaking-jonathan-pledges-2-million-jobs-annually-re-elected.html

/



\

stebell:
Jus wanna ask hw many of these aboki standing there hav PVC to vote come FailBuhari 14th?

GEJ Rocks.

/
PVC collection data will guide you.

Hausa people are the most politically active in Nigeria.

Hopefully, cows and goats won't vote.

\

/
It is very sad that GEJ cannot base his campaign on his achievements. Of course, they are nonexistent.

His only hope for redemption is to ignite people's paranoia for GMB. Thus, he resorts to add hominem attacks.

Most effectively, his team has managed to keep his wife away from the limelight and a microphone.

Kath5kouture:
Good money managers like Yourself am sure would know a lot about the subject. Thanks for letting us know you also patronize whores!

/
If this is your only inference from reading that, I can only SMH.

\

/
Can someone help us to count how many "if" s appeared in the original post.

Conditional statements are akin to scare tactics.

\

/
For some reasons, Muslims act like they are some special breed of people. I think they need to come down from their high horses.

Even on NL, one has to go through a list of disclaimers, rule and regulations; just to post a comment on a freaking Islamic thread.

But on a Christian thread, the mantra is "jab away".

Nonsense
\

/
It will be interesting to see how they will cut and eat the cake especially the uppermost segment.

Perhaps a ladder will be handy.

\

/
Tough one.

Get involved in physical fitness. It may help.

\

/
Crowd in Nigeria does not mean anything.

Any kind of noise attracts crowd because people are jobless, curious or bored. Be it masquerade, dance, fire outbreak, accident, etc; a massive crowd will always show up.

If in doubt, go in front of your house now and start a fight.

And for GEJ and GMB rallies, people come for stomach infrastructures to see if there will be distribution of largesse. You will be surprised that a good number of those present in the rsllies do not have PVC

/

okoomoge2:
E get how we dey do am for these sharp runs babe!! Players in the house go Sabi.

If babe one pull fast one on you, use reverse psychology in her, she go spread leg dey beg you. We boys call this code "Millionaires Bullshit".

The break down:

1. You must learn how to speak proper English. No fake accent oo! I mean queens.

2. You must learn how to talk slowly, this we call attention control.

3. You must be a power/ smart dresser! Not just designers, you need to get a tailor that knows your body structure well.

4. Your grooming must be top notch. Barbers shop once a week , pedicure/manicure/ facials/ face massage ....

5. You must know where the big boys pad is and be friends with the bouncers. Steady tipping of bouncers/bar tenders.

6. At least you must keep, mint fresh money at home. 200k may be, few pounds,euros,dollars, riyals.

7. Your wallet should always have mint notes.

8. Invest in wicked watches: vacheron Constantine,phillipe patek, Raymond well, Tag Heu, Tissot,Rado. Go to Lagos Island, you will find replicas.

9. Good italian/brazilian/Spanish hand made shoes

10. Your ride must be super neat. You may not
necessarily need a range but the interior /exterior/alloy wheels must be sparking. You A/c must be as cold as Alaska or North Pole. fresh/ rose car fragrance.


Never discuss your job/career with babes , remain mysterious and aloof. Don't aim for the
kitten!! Have a lot of non sexual girl friends, from very beautiful to average looking babes.

Use the codes above, you will lay any babe with ease without spending money! Above are the area code anywhere in the world.

Flunt you are sophisticated and stylish with potential to be the next big thing to happen.

/

Stop fronting...

You are a learner...

Your game is weak...

You might as well pay the girl off than go through all these BS for poon...

\

/
If your game is tight, runz girls will pay money to get close to you.

Drive a nice ride, dress neat, live in a good environment and form hard to impress.

Runz girl go bow to your superior format.

Or just be realistic about it. Ask yourself if it is worth it to spend all the money just to stick your pen1s in a hole. I don't think so.


\

Firefire:
Discussion within the party to settle any fear should be entertain with the benefit of the masses in mind.
...

God bless your hustle this Year.

Shalom!

Firefire!

/
If I steal your fowl, prepare a delicious meal with it and served you the meal with chicken wing. You enjoyed it, blessed me and prayed for success in my endeavours.

NB: Don't forget that you just ate your chicken.

What do you think I will steal next?

I am a Nigerian politician and you represent the hoi polloi.
\

So if someone shows up in a Range Rover, the pastor is supposed to have him declare the source of his wealth under oath (with proof) before welcoming him/her into the church?

Aren't we being ridiculous with our criticisms?

\

/
He needs to cut back on the steroid because it shrinks the manhood. This dude has no idea what he is doing to himself. "Muscle hank" is so 90s. A well-toned body is all he needs.
\

pappilo:
The biggest culprit is the mumu girlfriend that called the police for a man with a manic episode.

Unless she is white or spends all her free time watching E! she would have been following the news and known about the rise in the number of black men killed by police when doing nothing wrong or involved in petty misdemeanours (jaywalking/selling loosies)

Why the hell would any sensible black person in the US call the police on their loved one during a mental episode when stats show that 42% of those killed by police over a 12 year period had a form of mental illness.

/
A girlfriend to a dude with manic disorder?

Some ladies dey try o!

Something was bound to happen soon or later.

And it just happened.

/.

barcanista:
Okay... There is nothing they (Ohanaeze) can do about it. Mbaka commands more followership than Ohanaeze

/
They say "truth hurts".

I was expecting them to say that Fr. Mbaka lied.

And perhaps show us 2nd Niger bridge, Enugu-Osha freeway, etc. But no! All those grey-haired nuisance called Ohaneze with no followership are hell bent on making fun of their eldership.

SMH
/

/
The Oba is an id.iot.

Whether GEJ is corrupt or not is not the nucleus of the matter.

Nigerians are worried that corruption is going unabated. Except for the recent pretentious announcement, GEJ has no anti-corruption agenda to deal with the menace.

He chose to look the other way why the plunder of the national resources takes place.

All of the past leaders/politicians (IBB, OBJ, GEJ, GMB, etc) are corrupt. No exceptions because the society is very fertile for corruption to flourish.

So should we continue as nothing is wrong? Is corruption now our culture?

In fact, it appears that incorruptibility is a crime

This is why people have no respect for traditional institutions. Oba's palace burned/demolished, Emir in exile, Eze wanted for kidnap/fraud, etc. continue to grace our daily news. And they are still delusional to the power of the stool.

With N50million or less, any charlatan can go to his town and cause some ruckus and become the new traditional leader. Worse comes to worst,
they give him an autonomous community.

.

\

Kath5kouture:
Firstly,a broke guy has no business 'dating' which is used to describe fornicating these days cos the strength used to have sex is meant for working and earning a living. Secondly,you just exposed yourself as a patronizer of whores you claim are cleaner than 'decent' women who at least know their health status and those they've slept with and keep 'decent' jobs that pay way better than the peanuts you pay your 'clients'.
All in all I pity your wife or future wife if you are still single. Na she go suffer am!

/
The issue of prostitution is a hard nut to crack.

Some guys have girlfriends, who in turn have boyfriends. The guy buys BB, Android phones, Brazilian hair, etc. for the gf who in turn gets similar gifts from her other beaus. At the end, her stuff is enjoyed by all the patronizers (boyfriends).

In another scenario, B has a boyfriend but goes out on "runz" to make more money. She leads the choristers on sundays. A good girl?
Yes, to those who do not understand her classified lifestyle. Everyone is only as good as the dark side of him/her that you don't know.

In yet another scenario, C has no time for all the emotional baggage. She knows that the end justifies the means. So she decided
to take the path of least resistance: No need for unnecessary dates. Bring cash and get laid.

One common denominator--in all the scenarios, guys paid money somehow to get laid. I think the term "prostitute" should be abolished.
I call it "ladies doing their thing".

Good money managers will tell you that it is cheaper to patronize prostitutes than have a girlfriend after all STDs are equal opportunity invaders.

And the fact that vendors can hardly keep condoms on their shelves proves that most people do not trust their significant others, having taken pregnancy out of the equation.



\

/
GMB in Rivers State, Cross River and Bayelsa.

GEJ..be a man and go to Sokoto, Yobe, Adamawa and Borno!

\

/

"WE did not squander the external reserves, WE embezzled it. Nigerians never cease to amaze me. Common stealing, they called it corruption; now common embezzlement, they are calling it squandering. SMH". ...GoodLuck Jonathan
\

/

And you don't think it has something to do with the little guy being farther away from the brain than the heart?

\

WhiteTechnology:
Don't worry

By march, you will feel more heat

Have your state paid salary for the last 3months.?

/
People who act rarely talk.

Nigeria owed salaries in arrears when oil was $140/barrel. So @ $50+/barrel, I don't expect anything different. If oil goes to $500/barrel, they will still owe unless some drastic changes happen. Debt has become a norm.

WhiteTechnology:
If it was easy, OBJ would have done it.


As GEJ dey go Nigeria dey go

/
OBJ did his part in a diplomatic way, sort of.
He detoxified militancy out of ND leaders by force-feeding them with money. Who wan suffer? I will be surprised if Asari can even shoot a Kimber 1911 today. Age is not on his side either.

ND militants are fighting for resource control(oil money) on earth. BH fighters are fighting for resource control(virgins) in after life. The path to reach to BH target is a path most mortals are afraid to take--death.

And don't even think Asari and Tompolo are immortals. .