₦airaland Forum

@ Somze,

Good news for CHELSEA.
Alex has just signed a 3 year-deal for Chelsea this evening and he is now a bonafide Chelsea player.
How would Jose arrange his defence?

Did u say Lampard must be off-loaded? Am i seeing/hearing right?
Just some few weeks back u were the chairman of pro-Lampard party.
Why the change of heart?
Lampard should be dropped from the English 1st team and he doesnt even want to put pen to paper.
The plonker wants to earn £150k a week . . . . . . Roman must be a Father Christmas.

@ A-40,

I got ur ass there . . . . . . . . That was Jigga's rhymes(Takeover) u are spewing there.
Dont be playing that game on me, aiiiiiight?
Anyways, it was nice while the beef lasted. I'm glad CHACAL got ur ass whupped.

@ J-K

Stop beating about the bush. Tevez is now a complete Man United player.
The Premier League has ratified the deal but he cannot play on sunday cos Carlitos lacks match fitness.
He wont be ready till the Manchester derby next weekend.
The Gaffer wants to unleash the PITBULLs on Eriksson's men and devour the BLUE BOYS of Manchester next week.


@Razorr,
That Iranian shit is the joke of the year . . . . . . .
How can Man United let that happen?
Some Al-Qaeda hoodlums seizing OT? I am having a laugh . . . .

@ Ass-40,

Kiss ur gurlfriend for me . . . . . . . . .
Power failure in London? This is not Mushin, dawg.
Have urself a wonderful day with ur missus.
Use condoms if u must and stay away from Man Utd thread.
I am exhausted and people are starting to put pressure on me to squash the beef.

@ Jeje,

I give up . . . , . . . . . , . . . . .
It seems u are shy to open up in a forum like this.

Anyways, what are Arsenal's chances of notching 3 points on saturday?
Fulham wont be an easy nut to crack. Its a London derby.
I forsee a score draw, 2-2 or 1-1. Arsenal is droppin 2 points.
Wanna bet?

@ Jejestix,

U know u are my favourite Isolo babe.
Tell us about this game of love and life.
We know u are experienced and u do Aunty Sarah's column on the Vanguard newspaper.
Share us a bit of ur experience so that peops like Razorr wont be used/re-used and abused . . . . . . . . ,

To Footie . . . . . ,

Gabriel Heinze is from South America and he became a cult hero at OT
Veron wasn't a flop and Diego Forlan was handy when he came to Man Utd.
Scored some mouth-watering goals against the Scousers that put them headz to sleep.
Why Tevez would be a buzz is just because he's done a year stint and has learnt alot about English football.
Fergie will unleash him next weekend . . . . . . .Be prepared.

@ Jejesticx,

What qualities have u got that will not make a straight-thinking dude dump ur ass.
It has to be something juicy or refreshing.
Can u please share so that chicks like Razorr and Muks can learn from ya.
They have been used/abused by guys and they change boy/fs like sanitary pads.

TEVEZ COMPLETES MAN UTD DEAL.


Carlos Tevez has finally completed his protracted move to Manchester United.    
The Premier League champions confirmed on Friday afternoon the 23-year-old Argentina forward had joined on a two-year loan.


Tevez, who has been the subject of a long running Premier League investigation into third-party ownership, has been training with United all week.

However, he is extremely unlikely to be involved in United's opening game of the season against Reading on Sunday, instead being pencilled in by Sir Alex Ferguson for next weekend's derby clash at Manchester City.

Despite delays in completing the deal, Ferguson was happy for the Premier League to be extremely thorough.

'It is completely understandable the Premier League want to scrutinise every detail,' he said.

'I am happy with that because then we know we are getting a player in the right circumstances, with everything clarified and cleared by the appropriate authorities.

'We know he is our player but even if it was all done today, I wouldn't use him on Sunday. It would more likely be against Manchester City next weekend.


N.B. TEVEZ WILL WEAR NUMBER 32 SHIRT and fans are already buying shirts from the MEGASTORE.
SQUEAKY BUM TIME is here again for UNITED RIVALS.

@ Banderas,

Jeje is a she and she will have fits with that club u mentioned.
Her boy/f used to support Derby County back in the days and the fella jilted Jeje.
Derby is kinda bad memories to Jejestix.

@ Jejestix,

That makes u a Liverpool fan or Spurs or is it Roy Keane's Sunderland?
Be specific.

@ Jeje,

Getting to know u . . . . , . .
Which of the clubs do u support?

@ Razorr,

That was funny.
U are getting witty these days.


@ Loyika,

I can understand Africans lying about their ages.
They need to lie to break into the European football scene.
Why would someone like Robben lie about his age?
Have u seen Robben's face on TV? Bloody hell.
Even Chelski fans are beginning to question his age.
Adebayor claiming 22 is understandable.

@Jeje sweetie,

Dissin aint good but somebody's gotta do it.
If we allow irritants like Ass 40 to keep on ranting and spewing shit then u allow EVIL to reign.
Lets cut these guy's balls off and make him an eunuch like his daddy.

@ Razorr,
A-40 can be likened to a big boil in her momma's pussy.
You can't ignore it because it pains and u can't indulge it because its messy and gets in the way when A40 father's rotten cock is crusing /grazing the alley.
What can one do?
Please advice.

@ Loyika,

I have a big worry on a certain player called Arjen Robben.
Do u believe in ur heart of hearts that Robben is 23.
My church mind says he cannot be less than 40.
I need to see Arjen's birth certificate.
No 23 year old looks like that,
Tevez, Torres, Ronaldo, RVP and even Henry dont look as old as ROBBEN.
What chu think?

@ Ass-40,
Back from the dead??

You got classes in 45 minutes? Tell us u got to go and join your touts at the bus-stop snatching changes and pocket-books.
What i am interested to know is if your Momma died last night or survived? P+P was late last night,innit?
For Bleep's Sake . . . . .Stop talking shyte. You and your family are loc'ed up in shed and you're spewing here u drink Henney and Moet.
Who dash monkey banana? That kind of life is strictly for peops like me not peasants like u who sweep markets to make ends meet.
You are disgrace to all manhood as your life is full of empty promises n broken dreams.


[quote author=A-40 link=topic=17491.msg1377200#msg1377200 date=1186749074]You should quit talking this i got money shit in my ears it is sounding redundant man you are shooting airballs at the bloodclot basket.what your broke ass calls money is what i am use to booze in a week my breakfast would last your broke and pathetic asses for weeks.I am used to balling but your broke ass needs practice.I am out of here.[/quote]I am use to booze, I am out of here . . . . . . . . .
My cousin in the KG will not write this kind of shit.
Ohh ma God. If anyone believes Ass-40 has seen the four walls of a school then the person should be shot.
Why don't u get adult classes instead of writing like this.
R u so poor u cannot even afford to grab some education?
Ya life needs some sorting.
The lat time i checked, your father's will is just worth cobbler accessories and tools which is just about £30.
So what u gon' do?

@ Ruudie,

Aiiiyo, i drink to that.
NANI will be the buy of the season . . . . . .I hope he does not get injured.

Wonders shall never end.
Girl to Girl action and one of em got knocked up
I need to call Prof. Patterson to shed some light how this kizzack was made possible.

24 is the Shiznit.
The Series is suspenseful and quite captivating.
It keeps u at the edge of ur seat for a whole weekend without stepping out.
The best TV series ever made.

Prison Break is also good but it got boring after a while.
It should have ended in Season 2 but the plonkers decided to extend it for one more season.
Its getting monotonous.


The TV series better than 24 or Prison Break is SLEEPER CELL.
U will be blown away by the production and the story line behind it.
While 24 lets u see it from the angle of the CTU/Feds and Security agents . . . . . .SLEEPER CELL lets u see it from the Terrorists angle, plots and strategy to blow USA away.

@ Razorr,

Do u have a cock?
How did u knock-up MUKINA 2?
With a cunt or a strap-on?

@ Loyika,

That is different.
SAHA would lose his shirt as soon as Tevez starts playing.
Louis will be condemned to Carling Cup matches and Reserve league.
Rossi has a buy-back clause on his contract and can come back to Man Utd when Villareal decides to hock him off.

Making Gallas a captain is like SAF making Darren Fletcher one @ Man United.
I will personally go to OT and slap Fergie's head around.
Its sordid and grotesque to even think William Gallas will wear captain arm band.
Something to flaunt to 'em Russian army at SW London, innit?
Ashley Cole wld be feeling hard done by . . . . . .had he stayed at Arsenal . . . . . . He could have been the s.k.i.p.p.e. , , , . , . . .

The season wld be interesting.
In my mind's eye, i see Gallas and Lehmann having a row during a match.
Lehmann being a hot-head nudged Gallas and gave him a tongue-lash in German language.
Arsene Wenger is a Arrow and this is why i dont like him.
He sucks up too much for French players.

@ Loyika,

Wenger is a Arrow.
He would always protect the interests of his kinsmen @ Arsenal.
Gallas made captain at the expense of Toure? Thats silly.

Wenger argued its better for someone in the defence to be the captain as he can see everything.
Valid point. Was Henry playing in the defence when he captained Arsenal?
Was Patrick Vieira a central defender?

Why not Lehmann or someone more reliable?
Gallas as a captain?
Ewwwwwwwwww.

@ I-man,

We should also assume Malouda, Eduardo and Sagna might not be a huge success cos they showed early promises?
Thats interesting . . . . . . . . . . I have seen NANI in about 4 games and u can tell the dude has got some skills and talents.
NANI has scored 3 goals in 4 pre-season games and i see no reason why he wont transform it to the EPL.
Hargreaves and NANI are good to go but i worrry for Anderson cos he's not 100% fit for the Premiership.


@ Amodu,

NANI will surprise u.
He is the most gifted player in the Prem bar Cristiano Ronaldo.

@ Rikkyjen,

Everyone identifies the threat of Man Utd.
United would win the season again without the purchase of the FANTASTIC FOUR
The addition of the quartet is making our enemies quiver in their groins.
Only an idiot will write off a United side with PAUL SCHOLES NANI  RONALDO TEVEZ and ROONEY.
The combo coming together is like mixing Biggie and Pac and sprinkle some Eminem on it . . . . . . Bloody Hell.
Arsenal, Chelsea and Liverpool should take cover.


@ Debosky,

Dont push your luck too far o.
Go n play somewhere on your Gunners thread, we are busy having a conference here.
Stop imitating KIT on this thread.
He is on ma most-wanted list right now because i want to chop his nigga ass off like the Congolese did Patrice Lumumba.
Tell Kitaun his ass is MINE for whupping.

@ I-man,

Why do people keep saying Veron was a flop?
Veron was what Drogba was in his 1st/2nd season but Drogba was given a chance to prove himself.
I remember Veron scoring a scorcher against the Arses and some beautiful goals in UEFA.
Juan Veron wasnt a flop at Man Utd . . . . . . . . .I hate such comments.

Nani is world class and can never be like Kleberson.
Kleberson is the only Brazilian i know that cannot play good footie.
He is as shitty as hell and how he made Brazil's world cup team is a mystery.
Nani will shine and Anderson would come good after a full season.
The squad looks good and we r good to go.

@ Rikkyjen,

Back to footie issues.

Did u see the match last nite?
Nani was awesome, he blew me away with his performance.
He is more matured than Ronaldo when Cristiano joined in 2003.
Ma dude has got the pace, balance and excellent ball control and well-weighted passes.
Scholes played 90 mins yesterday(Its the best news i have heard in August)
We are good to go on Sunday and i think Tevez's deal should close by this time tomorrow.

@ Asshole-40,

Where the Bleep are you?
Come out n play . . , . .come out n battle.
Ya lame ass got whupped by Chacal and u ran away with ur tails tucked btw ur diseased SCROTUMS.
The next time u see me . . . . . . .Nigga, run for ur miserable life.
Apparently, u went home to feed ur dying mum her P+P.
I told u ur resources are too thin to contest with me.
Its like Man United and Enyimba competing in the transfer market.
The rock on ma finger will lift u and ur impoverished family outta the poverty bracket for life.

@ Amodu,

U cant disown me as a friend now.
I know i have been a bad boy . . . . . .Forgive me JACKmodu!!!!!!!!!!!!
U can levy a fine or dock points from Man United but plz. . . . . . .Let me mash Asshole-40.

@ Ass-40,
Finally, the gay is throwing in the towel.
Ooooh Myyyy Days.
I can't believe u have squandered your take home pay to battle on Nairaland
Whats your momma going to eat now? Let me give u a WU-MTCN so u can pick some change to feed your momma and your daughters.
If u run now . . . . . .Chacal has won the battle.
I can meet u anywhere and battle u, meet anywhere and do fist-i-cuffs with ya knucklehead.
Lets see if i don't knock-out your hunger-infested belly out with a sucker punch.


@ Rikkyjen,
Le Chacal is just foolin around with words.
Sometimes cats sharpen their claws in case of a disguised attack on em.
Chacal is from the CAT family. A-40 is an ass which makes him a herbivore.
Herbivores eat grass and weed which explains his Jamaican connection, BLOODCLOT.

Sunday is a done deal.
I don't know what the gaffer has in store but Victory is certain.
Did u watch yesterday's matches. NANI will cause more damage than Ronaldo this season, mark ma word.
I am expecting to see Scholes and Owen in the middle.
Nani and Ronnie on the wings with Giggs running off Wazza in the attack.

@ Amodu,
Debosky is a twisted fella.
He is loving it.
My comments give him orgasms . . . . . .Its not his fault.
Most gunners are faggotz.

@ Ass-40,

gay,I am in England not CA.
OT to ma Crib is about 60 minutes drive so its achievable.
Talking about GREEN CARD . . . . . . . .You are clueless.
Meanwhile, i thought u left . . . ,  i was about beating the drums of victory and alas, i saw your swollen face.
You have taken enough jabs today to leak BLOOD in your BRAINS.
Momma wont recognise u when u turn in her (P+P) Pap + Palm-oil.


Ohhhh Ma Days,
The gay is talkin about REP.
U got no rep men . . . . . . I have stripped u of it and fed it into my shredder.
Ya rep is now ZILCH and i dont see how u will ever recover from this T.K.O.


I am sorry to have taken u apart this way.
Le Chacal was at the very top of his game and in this mood, i will kill of Fiddy.
Anyways, u went to borrow few hundreds again? Dont get into debt because u want to save face.
You and I know this battle is going one way.
Hey shithead, u are bleeding all over . . . . . .You are wounded.
Throw in the towel and i ma stop the batterings.
Tell a lie . . . . . . . .Join Man Utd and i will forgive your gay-ass.


@ Debosky,
Le Chacal is just having fun as usual.
As a wordsmith, i love to juggle with words and use em in an unlikely context.
A-40 would be having nightmares of me coming at him for months.
The gay now has BRAIN DAMAGE and could go CASSIUS CLAY's way if care aint taken.

@ Ass-40,

U are taking time to respond.
Is it NEPA or EFCC is raiding ur cafe and picking up fraudsters like u who's trying to milk me out of ur silly e-mails.
Tell any officer trying to arrest u that ur momma is frail and will die of starvation if u dont go home tonight.
Arresting u will only be a double jeopardy/punishment.
U are getting loc'ed up in a cell and your mum will give up the ghost.
I am loving this . . . . . . .

@ JACKmodu,

Dont sweat the technique.
The final whistle is beckoning.
Someone's pockets is being drained and will soon throw in the towel.
Besides, we are trying to make Man Utd thread the biggest on the Sports Section and we are few threads below Arsenal so we need to push it up.
In about 3 hours, the final whistle will sound. Just be patient.

Rastafarian, please try again.
I have been doing this since the fall of man.
Chacal was sticking cock to Eve before she became Adam's mistress in Eden so you're too lightweight to move me.

I have no business with Jamaicans winning the world cup. Thats for FIFA to decide.
Chacal has got armoury capable of fighting the World War 2 again so i am full y ready for u.
I got the ammo, my bullets are stacked and i am going guns-blazing on your ass.

The Battle will be WON if one of us leaves or goes AWOL tonight
That will mean throwing IN the towel so lets see who blinks 1st.
My church mind tells me u have less than 2 hrs to go.