₦airaland Forum

Anitatunde:
After serving 2 year prison sentence in Tanzania(You can see the full story here https://www.nairaland.com/7822614/crazy-story-tanzania-prison), I landed in muritala Mohammed international Airport Lagos, Nigeria hoping to restart life from the scratch. I drew a blueprint on how to kickstart my rebuilding process. It wasn’t easy at all, one year later, I was up to date. I had cleared up some of the mess I was in.

But something was missing, I needed a soul mate (BF) to complete and fill up the missing puzzle in my life. Since I was a fearless kind of woman, guys really get intimidated to roll with me.

So opted for the infamous online dating apps, on a Saturday morning after having breakfast, I downloaded the first and the last dating app. Tinder was the app I downloaded, been a pretty lady, guys swiped right and I got a lot of matches(if you know how tinder works).

After 5 minutes, I received the first message. I opened it and I was welcomed with a joystick pic(John Thomas). It was big and nice but I wasn’t interested, I can get JT anywhere on my street. I was in search of real connection and not one night kinda thingy.


After 30 minutes my inbox was full with a lot of “how much for a night”
“Do you want to see my JT”
“Let’s meet tonight” etc.
That is when I realized it was an app meant for the oloshos(working girls).


So I had to delete all my pic and subsequently delete the app, before deleting the app, I got a text from a gentle man called Femi, we exchanged contacts and deleted the app. Femi was a good looking guy, talks really well and wasn’t intimidated by my persona.

One week later we met on the island, in a very cool cafe. Femi drives a Range Rover, I drove my older sisters range rover velar too, so it was a Range Rover date 😉.

Femi didn’t see me leave my car, but been a girl who is 3 steps ahead of every one, I saw him leave his. We had a long talk.

In the midst of our long conversation, I could tell Femi never used a personified term, so I could tell this guy was arranging me for someone else. So to clear the air, I asked him “what are you really looking for” and to my greatest surprise he said “looking for a pretty lady to sleep with my dog”


I couldn’t comprehend the sentence, so I had to ask again to get more clarity, he repeated himself. I almost gave him a dirty slap but one spirit in me said “Calm down and play along”


After having the drinks, he called the waiter to get the bill, when the bill got to the table, I quickly collected the bill from the waiter and I paid for my item. (To avoid this guy using my destiny lol)


Now it was time to go, we walked to his car, before entering his car, I brought out my car keys and unlock it. When my car beeped and flashed, he was surprised to see the car I came with.

He quickly apologized for his stupid request. I walked away,I drove to a hotel close by then to my estate, to avoid been followed.



(For those asking me to continue the story. This is much that I can share)

THE END

eddynaira125:
Very impossible to unseat a Nigeria President who have been declare winner by INEC

LeeSmart:
Wanted staking 200k on newcastle 2.62 odd but wifey talked me out of it... Omor see as money pass person.

Angelfrost:
It's not even about world-class players... The club is badly and poorly run. They just throw big money at players, but no solid foundation, no proper transfer management, etc.

Ask them to name the coach that will succeed there... None of them can name one! Why??! They know, deep down, that even the best of the best will eventually unravel at Man United.

The owners should sell that club abeg... Let people with money and intelligence take over.

Look at Newcastle flourishing since they changed owners.

ThiefnubuBandit:
Okay

In another development, Ten Hag is not fit to coach Manchester United. He should be coaching clubs such as Barnsley or Red Bridge and Dagenham

Theesourcerer:
now you're talking

MzansiCoolio:
Lol, writing poop from inside a poop-filled gutter in Nigeria trying to diss SA when your lifelong dream was to get a visa to SA. Sorry you're a reject as a Nigerian in SA - continue admiring and envying from the outside.

Visa DENIED. Shalom!

MzansiCoolio:
Lol, long essay - i must have really touched a nerve.

I'll leave u to poop in peace in an open public gutter, next to your mother as per your culture since 1960. Shalom.

MzansiCoolio:
The same country you'd sell your mother's head to be granted visa by SA blacks? 🥱🥱🥱

Go take a dump alongside your mother in the gutter as per your culture. In 2023, no toilet to speak of.

MzansiCoolio:
🇿🇦🇿🇦🇿🇦🎉🥳 but not in the Nigerian slum of Hillbrow

Jennyclay:
Honestly, Nigerian men are so childish.

Men should learn to help a lady without expecting anything in return .

If you like spend millions and billions on me, if I don’t love you anymore I will kindly end the relationship.

And you try to forcefully take my property from me just because you bought it for me then I would have to report you to the police or sue you for stealing.

Good for nothing men everywhere!!!
Bunch of morons!!

Wawelexy:
A gift from a woman is like money collected from loan shark companys, once you are not playing by their rules, they will come for you.

Collecting gifts from a Nigerian girlfriend is no. 501 in 1000 ways to die

Sharpsharp00123:
anyone who engage in crime should b left to die like a fowl

They will tarnish Nigeria reputation abroad n still b d ones to call Nigeria a failed country

Westerhoffe:
It's quite hilarious to see people calling GOD'S name to this Show of Immortality. Men celebrating the height of Moral Decadence.

eepeepook:
Kingdavid Chinaeke Ofunne, thank you for revealing your Nairaland account. No wonder you were adamant to defend the write-up.

eepeepook:
Kingdavid Chinaeke Ofunne is bored. It is the reason he crafted this lie of a tale to trend.

Nigerians are very stupid on a regular day. A talent this one spent years to hone is now used to spread mischief.

Oga, your story na lie.

BlueStripper:
A good start but don't call on Governors alone.

CALL ON ALL STAKEHOLDERS (FG, Governors and Igbo's).

Members of the ESN belong to a family tree and Igbo's respect their family tree. Igbo's also respect their mothers more than their chiefs or kings.

Engage Igbo mothers and most importantly, address the issues of marginalization before and after the civil war.

The FG needs to apologize to Igbo's openly and publicly.

Nigeria needs National reconciliation and Healing from the ghosts of the civil war.

Nnamdi Kanu was once a Nigerian fighting for Nigeria's politics and internal security in London before drifting towards the Biafran IPOB movement. The facts and evidence are there.

Simon Ekpa was once an athlete who represented Nigeria and won trophies for this beautiful country.

Let's tell this truth for once. I have written many articles about the ghosts of the civil war and why every nation should avoid plunging into a civil war.

EbolaTinubu:
There is this girl that I have known from when she was schooling. After I graduated and went for my service,I went to her and asked her out . While we were gisting,i asked for her hand in marriage but she just looked at me then as if I be one nonsense person or an alien asking for her hand in marriage
I just jejely went and married my beautiful darling. After so many years. I just called one of her niece today and we were just discussing oh. I then remembered her. Immediately I asked her niece about the lady oh. The niece now told me that she is around and still single. This is after some years oh. I really felt bad about it. I then told her niece to give me her number that I would want to link her with one of my cousin that is searching for a wife to marry. This evening,i chatted her up and introduced myself. She asked for my picture,i sent it to her after much questions , she couldn't recognize me again because man don add up small. I just can't believe how she responded to me. And this lady in question is desperately looking for a man to marry her oh. See the chat below. If it's you, will you still continue with the conversation or forget about her.

popo1494:
Neatly used 2008 Lexus IS 250 with very sound v6 engine and smooth automatic transmission, thumb start with central lock remote, sunroof, leather seat and alloy wheels for 2.250m. Ajah, Lagos

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