₦airaland Forum

my own believe is that people shouldn't be hitting each other first of all.

the logic behind men not hitting women is because men are physically stronger. so that makes the dynamic uneven.
imagine for example a situation where the wife is 200 pounds heavier than the skinny husband. won't you agree that it will be a bullish behavior for the fat woman to be hitting her tiny husband who has less ability to defend himself? even if the husband hit her first, there should be a recognition that the husband is the vulnerable one in this case since the woman can easily defend herself and prevent the husband from attacking her.

so yea the whole taboo about men not hitting women is to prevent domestic abuse since women are much more vulnerable to it and have less ability to protect themselves from physical aggression than men do.
people have different level of morality/tolerance and it's up to the couple to decide how they want to follow the rule.

my advice: if things get out of hand, call the cops. lol

OAM4J:
Depends on what you term as "oppressed" innit? or should the majority be "oppressed" instead?

Quit this your Nazi-Jew thingy already. There is no law anywhere that will support that, and I told you already on this thread that it is the reason organisations like UN exists.

And stop equating a law disallowing an act because majority are against it to killing/exterminating a group/ an ethnic cause they are in minority. Doesn't follow each other.

so if the ugangan government decides to propose a law to jail and execute all gays and the gays rise up in protest against this proposed law, the majority are being oppressed? please explain further what you mean.

then you don't know the content of german laws in 1930s and 40s.
check this out: http://www.bl.uk/learning/histcitizen/voices/info/decrees/decrees.html

And I agree with you. The UN definitely lashed out against the Ugandan govt for proposing that anti-gay bill. but obviously the UN can only do so much. http://www.un.org/apps/news/story.asp?NewsID=33921&Cr=homosexual&Cr1

if you check out the link about german laws in the 1930s, you will see that the holocaust didn't just happen. it started with simple decrees and laws like these. ex banning jews from trade, banning Kosher practices, banning them from practicing their religion, forcing them to wear stars/mark of identification, confiscating their property (especially access to telephone, mail and other forms of communication), banning jewish children from school, secluding them to a ghetto, creating a department of racial hygiene etc all culminating in mass deportations and finally the holocaust. so it was a gradual systematic process.

the law doesn't just disallow an act. it disallows a way of life. just as the jewish way of life was disallowed. etc keep in mind Jew is NOT an ethnicity or race (if you must know that even race is a social construct). it's just a culture/way of life!! ie some people define being jewish as having at least a grandparent who practiced the religion,  some count recent converts as jewish. there are many definitions.

Sagamite:
Deviancy is not an individual right and not comparable to fundamental rights.

no comment for you.

OAM4J:
Dominant Minority shouldn't exist in true democracy IMO. Every member of a community/group should have equal say/vote on every matter. While minority have their say, majority wins. Except democracy is no longer the rule of numerical majority.

so if nazi germany decides to exterminate all jews tomorrow. that should be allowed based on the idea of majority rules?

OAM4J:
My problem with some of these civil rights movements is that they often forget that same individual rights apply to the majority as well, and when there is a conflict they should stop crying marginalization or prejudice.

For example while the minorities are entitled to their beliefs, morals, faith etc, it shouldn't come at the expense of majority discarding/changing theirs. Like in this discussion, while gays have the right to live their life as they want, it shouldn't be at the expense of the majority heterosexuals accepting what they consider wrong as right. Like why will they want to force me and my likes to believe that their definition of marriage is superior to ours?

so minorities should continue to be oppressed because you feel you are entitled to the rights to oppress them?
that's not the definition of individual rights. did you take a political science or government course at all?

OAM4J:
Though I am not a political scientist, I understand clearly that there are check and balances in democracy, but [b]ultimately [/b]the majority in a community will eventually have their way, even if it means changing their constitution.

depends on what kind of society it is.
that's why people are encouraged to be active citizens rather than passive citizens. and why the government (if it is effective) is there to protect the individual rights of the minority groups (ex. it is illegal for employers,schools etc to discriminate based on race, gender, sexuality, disability etc at least in the U.S).
why exclude the minority from the same rights that you enjoy. because of prejudice.


The word prejudice is most commonly used to refer to a preconceived judgment toward a people or a person because of race, social class, gender, ethnicity, age, disability, political beliefs, religion, sexual orientation or other personal characteristics.

OAM4J:
Minority rights will not come at the expense of majority rights.

of course not.
what kind of majority rights are you talking about?



The term Minority Rights embodies two separate concepts: first, normal individual rights as applied to members of racial, ethnic, class, religious, linguistic or sexual minorities, and second, collective rights accorded to minority groups. The term may also apply simply to individual rights of anyone who is not part of a majority decision.

Civil rights movements often seek to ensure that individual rights are not denied on the basis of membership in a minority group.

yup. I understand it as majority rule, minority rights.

tensor777:
And how common is it to marry up in Nigeria or anywhere else for that matter? People do tend to marry within their socio-economic class you know. So squash this idea of an impoverished lady using marriage as a way of escaping a life of squalor. The best way for such a woman to escape poverty is the obvious way- namely getting herself something tangible doing and not leeching off others.
Anyway a golddigger is likely to be a more experienced worldly woman as opposed to a naive schoolgirl who does not even have a chance at beating the players at their game

nobody said school girls were naive.
you've heard of the aristo phenomenon on naija university campuses.

tensor777:
Well that is unlikely to be a winning strategy because people tend to marry within their class and within their social circle. How many professionals do you know that would want to marry a liability or a drop-out in this day and age.
Okay maybe I get your misapprehension. You are referring to girls who fall for the lies the players tell them as gold diggers but that is not the case as in most cases these guys don't even have the gold to give out in the first place.  These good-time girls are addicted to bad boys and can not be classed as gold diggers

ok. I guess this gives us an insight into the class and social circle of the OP

that's nice. but can it last?

these men label women gold-diggers because they are trying to avoid traditional financial responsibilities.
on the other hand, they don't want a career woman who already is financially stable. instead they want a young dependent girl.

basically they want to eat their cake and have it. which is impossible.
even our forefathers married off their young daughters to the highest bidder.


nobody wants to live in poverty or wish it on their kin.

reported.

watch your language or I might have to start hitting the "report to moderator" button. i'm serious

cap28:
^^^^^^
when are these clowns going to stop mimicking african americans? so pathetic

you are calling d kokomaster a clown?

some women are gold diggers because that's what men prefer!!
as far as i'm concerned there are lots of single career women out there in their late 20s (it takes years and hard work to get educated and develop a career). most men just happen not to be interested in them and would rather prefer a young girl who obviously need to rely on a man to feed herself. and these young girls are not silly either. of course they prefer a rich man because otherwise, how are they going to survive.

so it's all give and take. Yes women can have it all!
How? if the men agree to co-operate. ex white males generally don't have problems with having a career wife because they believe in equality. so it works well for white families.
for  many black females on the other hand they usually have to choose one or the other because they usually can't have both. at least that's what I notice. and there aren't many marriages in the black community anyways. so career seem to be the better option for them I would think. because you can have a career and a single parent family. I think nigerian women in diaspora are also experiencing this at least going by the threads on nairaland (the phenomenon of getting educated, developing a career and then hitting your late 20s without finding a husband,  or finding a guy who is a golddigger!! talk about role reversal)
at least that is better than having nothing. no career and no husband. ie single mothers on welfare. lol

homophobic+misogynistic = sagamite

dayokanu:
Why do women prefer to marry people richer? Do they mean there cant be love to poorer people.

The concept of gold digging still prevails among females

why do men prefer to marry people prettier or sexier. do they mean there can't be love to uglier people.

the concept of womanizing still prevails among males

una still dey here?

buzugee:
you know tensor, our nigerian kids in the west are all turning into monsters. tonnes of nigerian youths are killers and homicidal maniacs in britain now. so much for, 'if you want your kid to have a future then dont raise them in nigeria'. some knuckle dragging cretin actually said that in this thread 
like i have lost count of the number of nigerian youths who have murdered people in london. its like a concrete jungle out there chief.

maybe these kids live in the ghetto parts of london? so they're surrounded by bad influences.
many nigerians who can't afford to have a very good life in the UK or US are better off raising their children in naija or sending them to school there. then they can come back to US/UK after they've matured enough. unless they can afford to put their kids in a good environment abroad which is quite expensive. ex good schools, neighborhoods etc

Your kids will most likely turn out alright if you train them in the right environment within the country. whether it be america or nigeria.

[quote author=tpiah! link=topic=590933.msg7663696#msg7663696 date=1296783967]what happened?[/quote]fstarnger's lack of knowledge on all things Nigerian.

[quote author=isale_gan2 link=topic=590933.msg7663693#msg7663693 date=1296783922]Jenifa, darling?  Have you been drinking?  

P.S. I mean, when did you ask me the identity of Oga Kilode's "secret admirer"?  And that list is all of Stranger's making.  Don't mind him.[/quote]i swear i'm not drinking dear
I just assumed your comment about kilode would have alluded to his secret admirer.
but then I went back to read the previous posts and realized that you didn't even create the list. what a bummer

ouch

mental/psychiatric issues.
the police ought to put a shirt over her head. why did they leave her upperbody naked?

[quote author=isale_gan2 link=topic=590933.msg7663644#msg7663644 date=1296783076]When?[/quote]here :

Katsumoto  -  I did nothing; he's just playing
Bluetooth - Don't think so; he's just playing
OAMJ - He's a tard  Grin; he's just playing
DayoKanu - We've been thru this; he's a troublemaker  Smiley
Buzegee - He's my buddy
SEFAGO - How could you?  Angry

[quote author=tpiah! link=topic=590933.msg7663627#msg7663627 date=1296782873]@ jenifa

^^arent you nigerian?

fstranger keeps crushing on you so i can barely make head or tail of whatever's going on.

throw isale-gan into that mix.[/quote]lol. don't mind fstranger.
but you are one hell of an instigator though what do u mean by throwing isale gan into a mix

ok good for you. bye

@topic, vanity upon vanity. . .

my fiance is yoruba so what's your point.

win-win. we are all happy.

well, of course he is my love. and i demand to know who the isale gan secret admirer is!!

[quote author=tpiah! link=topic=590933.msg7663589#msg7663589 date=1296782326]jenifa, what's the deal with you and kilode.[/quote]lol. just wanted to know who his secret admirer is. you know I asked isale gan the question.