Stories. All these long grammar like we didn't know already that they would dismiss the case. Nigeria is not a serious minded nation. The day we decided amongst ourselves to be serious, that is the day this country will move forward. But in the meantime, let everyone keep running away from the problem

My thoughts exactly. Nigerians now see it as a game of chess. No wonder the massive rate of heartbreaks and divorce in the society.

Honestly I think it's about that time the military seized power in Nigeria because the way things are going upside down, I don't see any hope or light at the end of the tunnel.. We claim to be practising democracy, but we are not.

Na too many Nigerians cause am. We don pack ourselves to go and spoil the place. Na everywhere we dey spoil. What a Nigerian man cannot spoil does not exist.

You see this japaa syndrome is a disgrace to this country. And to think that we are doing nothing to stem the tide shows that nobody wants Nigeria to be better. I've said it, and I'll say it again, Nigerians are the main problem of this country. The government that we all blame is not a robot. It is filled up with Nigerians like me and you who are only concerned about themselves and their families. No one gives two flying fuuuuuckks about anyone in Nigeria. We are a very selfish, corrupt people. And we have refused to do the right thing to make this nation to work. Let everyone keep running away, no problem, since that's all we do, we run away from our problems. The abroad we are running to, do you think that they too don't have their own challenges? Or you think that by some stroke of magic, Nigeria will turn to Canada overnight. The whites we are running to their countries won't come and fix Nigeria for us. I've said it that if every Nigeria moves to Canada and every Canadian move to Nigeria in an exchange, give Nigeria one year. You will see that Canadians will make Nigerian to work, and the Nigerians in Canada will turn Canada back into Nigeria. The problem is not the country, but we the citizens. The say Nigerians decide to have a different mindset about life, that is the very day Nigeria will turn around. But until then, let us keep running away. No wahala.

They should all leave abeg. This country knows how to dim someone's light. Nigeria is a cursed nation, I swear.

Is it not Nigerians? They keep soiling the already soiled image of this country. Like some Nigerians are hell bent on destroying Nigeria totally. Each scam, na Nigerian be the chief orchestrator.

DaddyCoool:


You obviously haven't lived in the inner ghetto. Same thing obtains wherever there is poverty and want

I understand but Nigeria's poverty rate is so high. Every situation is an opportunity to make money.

This cannot stop because you see the country we find ourselves in has effed up our minds mentally. Many Nigerians are psychologically effed up. I won't blame us, it's the situation of the country. We see everything as opportunity to get something out of someone. The poverty level in Nigeria is so high, despite the resources that this nation has. Nigerians shouldn't be going through hardship like this. Other countries who don't have up to half of the resources we have are doing way better than us. It's a sad reality we find ourselves. It's so hard to date these days that it's better you either do "friends with benefits" or just stay single for life. Every Nigerian woman is wired the same way with their thinking. It's so sad honestly. But like I said it's poverty/ hardship mindset that has affected us all.. in the UK, who do you want to use money to impress? When almost everyone can afford the basics for themselves. Segggz is also not cheap abroad like it is in Nigeria. You can't just give anyone money and knack her aboard unless say na hooker. But in Nigeria, even good girls that can from decent families don turn hooker finish. It's a scourge, a serious one.

This is a serious issue, but you see all these people you're reporting her to from Pastor to Mother to brother won't solve this matter. You need to, as a matter of urgency seek the help of a professional sex therapist. I can recommend a very good one to you, only that she is costly, but trust me, she will get to the root of the matter. There is an underlying issue with your wife. Maybe childhood trauma. Maybe she was molested while she was young. Something has definitely gone wrong for her to develop resistance to sex. Seek professional help. There is nothing your Pastor can do because he is not a psychologist. Just google "Dr Tolu the Fixer". Try and connect with her, she will help you.

addmole:
I and My wife have been married for 5 years. We are based here in Lagos. She's 35 years old. We are doing very okay and living comfortably. Since we got married, my wife hated sex so much. I am not even trying to sugarcoat this. She doesn't want to hear you talk about it or she does it. There's no one in the family that haven't tried to settle our differences since we got married. She was never like this when we were dating. It's been 1 issue to the other. She doesn't initiate sex, and when she does accept you to have sex, it's missionary style and it's just 1 round. Ah, me wey dey like knack wella. This woman begin change am for me. Lol. She doesn't want to hear you discuss sex.

Anyway sha, lets move on...

5 YEARS ago, her mum came to my house to kneel down and tell me I am stressing her daughter that I should not kill her with sex. Her then-unmarried sister then asked if I ama dog? Ah, insult. Anyway, I don forgive her. I spoke to my wife and told her what is the meaning of this? What kind of lies are you feeding your family with? This is the same person who happens to make just 1 round of sex. Just 1 round. She lies flat on her back. Once you are done, she quickly pushes you away if you stay on top of her for more than 10 to 15 minutes. There were times she would hit me if I try to initiate sex. I reported to her elder brother. He elder brother warned her. She stopped. She moved to kicking me anytime we initiate sex on bed, i reported to my pastor, he spoke to her and then, she stopped. My pastor told me i have to be patient with her. I said OK.

Omo...
The only time we make love is just 1 round, missionary style and that's it. She says she has pain on her stomach. I have been patient for 5 years with her. I told her anytime she's strong enough, we can make out. That there's no problem.

I have been pressured to cheat on her many times. i HAVE BEEN REALLY PRESSURED. Its just not easy. Her family have insulted me for demanding sex from her. Lol. The thing tire me. I see no where i am demanding. We don't do any other position apart from the missionary style. We do not even kiss. This is a woman that doesn't want you to kiss in in anyway. Even sometimes, she shouts at you when you try to be romantic to kiss her unexpectedly just to spies up our love life. She doesn't even want you to cuddle her on bed. She wants to be alone. Make money, attend to her business, vibes, laugh with friends and family and that's it. When it comes to sex, don't go there discussing that with her about making out.

I even had to retort to preparing her mind for sex by sending her a position we would try on WhatsApp, she would leave the message on read and not respond. When you talk to her about what you sent to her, she would just tell you, she's not strong to make love.

ANOTHER PART OF HER:
My wife is a very bitter person full of anger. If you try to tickle her when she's cooking in the kitchen to play with her, she gets angry and warns you not to try such. My wife doesn't want you to play with her. I am not writing all these to make it look I am a victim here. But all these are my experiences. I have to pour it out. I NEED SOME ADVICE.

There were many times, we agreed on separating. But we have already children and we used to think about these because the quarrels and the disrespect, sex and everything is causing a whole lot on us.

We do not have any form of healthy discussion very well. Before you know it, we are quarrelling over the place, she's shouting. There was a time we quarrelled that after throwing a Gotv remote at her, she fainted. She woke up before we got to the hospital. She almost died. I told her, she needs to stop her anger and control herself and enjoy her marriage. She just won't listen. She's an Edo woman.

I have tried many times to leave the marriage because it's affecting my mental health. Sometimes I regret about getting married to her. Sometimes, I just feel, maybe I CAN TRY MORE and give her a chance. When you call her to discuss our sex life, about her anger and bitterness, she doesn't apologise. She hardly apologise. Even when I get to explain her part on why she was wrong, she claims she's right until maybe someone hears us arguing before she would reluctantly apologise.

I have been battling a really starved sex life, full of a woman with bitterness, anger and pride who never apologise. She's quick to advice other women on Facebook, She would video call friends, give them advice and her family how they need to maintain peace with their relationship. But she never seem to give me respect in anyway in her own own. Hmmmm.

Recently, my wife brought out another timetable that she cannot cope making out with me the way she does. Which is 3 times a week. That she can only be available to make love 2 times a week. This 2 times is just 1 round each. This is how she wants it. I immediately responded to her that I feel her pain. I understand. She cannot be pressured just to make it look like she wants to please me that I would rather get a side chic. Yes, i know this was wrong to tell her, but i am frustrated. She disrespects me and starve me of sex and she's even bending the rules again. She responded that 'ok that I am free to do what i LIKE'.

i decided to bring this here to know the comments from people. I would like to get advice from persons who are going through similar things like this and advice me on what to do.

Some of you might say, call her and talk to her. I have done that several times since in the last 5years. I did it last night and twice today. I have spoken to her. She promised she would change, she would not only repeat the same thing but make things worst the next time.

She disrespects me a lot. I have sometimes left the house but come back after families get to call me. She would change for a week and return to her old self.

What do I DO? Please make your responses constructive enough.

Like I say, women are never always certain the boys they are dating will eventually marry them. So that's the problem. They never know. And being in a long distance relationship doesn't help at all. She feels comfortable with you, she might want you even and enjoy your company, but eventually, she is committed to her relationship that is about to lead to marriage.

The corruption in this country is so shameless. You can see why other counties don't rate us?

Hahahaha they say 'smoked out". Iffa hear say he never leave Naija. Smoke out ko, smoke in ni

Mr man nothing is guaranteed. Yet I agree with you to an extent, but see life is full of ups and down. Many parents did like you said, but where did it end up? Tell me. What works for Mr A might not work for Mr B. And what works for Mr B might not work for Mr C. This life na 50:50..

Mine is smoky jollof rice. Goshhh I cannot resist jollof

It's honestly tough out there. In Nigeria you can barely survive on 100k salary, not to talk of 70k. It cannot cover transport alone. I won't blame him for resigning, but the problem is he should have weighed his options very well before resigning. I'm also in the same shoes, it's not easy being a Nigerian living in this useless country, trying to survive. No one gives a hoot about you. That's why I don't blame those who delve into crime to survive in this Nigeria. Salary can never sustain you.

Hahahahahahahahahahahahaha 🤣. But why do Nigerians like taking law into their hands. How can you mob a police officer? Chai the Nigeria police have lost their respect oh. But the police too their excesses are too much. Small thing that you will use common sense for, you will complicate matters.

Hahahahahahahahahahahahaha 🤣🤣🤣. We don carry our matter go continental. "Nigerian men"? What a Nigerian man cannot do does not exist. Everyone don sabi us.

I knew that if it got to penalty that Nigeria would lose. Our problem is scoring goals. Our strikers are not prolific. The only prolific striker we have is Asisat. Asides her, no one else is prolific. That's the reason we crashed out.

They should have packed their bags before the game as that would be the last game. England will popo Nigeria ehn. If we are not careful, they will embarrass us. That England team is just too good, and their manager is a very tactical manager.

Once you start taking sleeping pills, you'll get addicted and it's not good. besides you see this mobile handset ehn, it's a distraction. It won't just let you sleep. It takes discipline to know how to schedule things. Many Nigerians don't sleep. That's why death expectancy rate is so high in Nigeria.

Hahahahahaha Only Nigerians will travel outside of Nigeria and 'give glory to God'. Chai Africa and poverty are like five and six. Also everyone wants to go to UK, Canada, UK meanwhile there are several other beautiful countries all around the world that are even cheaper. Now demand for UK is so high, so the price has jacked up. Explore other countries abeg

TheGiftedOne:
All this self validation is the first sign of low self esteem.




Imagine who day talk self, person wey I no go look twice.

infact you just said it all. Empty barrels are the ones who make the loudest noises

Abifarin16:
Make I follow go uninstall JoyCash for my phone.

hahahahahahahahahahahahaha 🤣🤣🤣🤣 legend!!!

plaindealer:


The only reason why you are here stalking me is tribalism because people like you look the other way and absolve your people no matter what, you are used to looking the other way.

Look at Peter Obim Oby Ezekwezilli and igbo people in general, they always have so much to say when it comes to issues in other regions but when it comes to the SE, they are all of a sudden deaf and dumb, they see no evil and hear no evil, it's all tribalism and that's exactly what you are doing, you are a tribal police and all you care about is igbo people and defending igbo people no matter the crime and atrocities committed.

Bigot.

hahahahahahahahaha 😂😂😂😂😂😂. On top this matter?

Femi Falana is one of the most honest and intelligent notable figure in the society. The man is always unbiased.

plaindealer:
Cyberstalking, cyber harassment, bullying and intimidation is getting out of hand and the government must do something about it.

Just imagine some igbo people still raving mad and constituting a nuisance just because they cannot tolerate and respect other people's rights to freedom of choice and association.

Must every Nigerian vote for obi and must you commit felony crimes because obi lost an election?

Sad..

There you go again after making a valid point, you decided to tribalise it. That's not the way to go sir. It has nothing absolutely to do with tribe.

endsarrrs:
Back side like mine.



Na one man dey sponsor this called holiday....

BTW, How to monetize FTC(first to comment) space here in Nairaland

you don't mean it?

At this rate, I'm tempted to believe her. Nigerian men just cannot do without cheating. Like it's in our DNA. Even married men. Like I don't understand oh

Aladeintl:

There was this popular MoG from Ibadan who do early morning prayer on Ajilete FM that I adamantly forbid my wife from listening to.

I told her, 'I am not saying you shouldn't listen to him but not under my own roof.'

I didn't banned her because the man was fake. I didn't think the MoG is fake, but I find some of his modus operandi unbiblical.

Likewise, some songs like Daddy wey dey pamper is not fit my own family. While I am around, she mustn't.

I will soon delete that song from her phone sef.

Read tales of a Nursing Dad here www.joelalade.home.blog

I once collected her purse and gave her only transport fare when she was going for a crusade organized by one prophet olororo.

What is my drift? I have no qualm with Pastor Jerry Eze and his YouTube early morning prayer ministry but it is a disgrace and dishonour to you, the man of the house, if your woman can wake up to listen to other man before you.

It's a disgrace to my fatherhood if my kids are doing morning devotion via internet led by another man and wife and kids aren't to be blamed.

Therefore, we men, should truly man up and be the leader God made us.

The likes of Pastor Jerry Eze and co come into equation because many men are not spiritual leader. He is filling the gaps created by spiritually-absent fathers.

Your wife jumping from one prayer mountain to another is because you haven't ascertain your spiritual headship in the head.

And for those joining Pastor Jerry from their boyfriend's room, just dey play ooo, dey play ooo.

May God helps us to discharge our duties accordingly.

Ire oooooooo

I cannot almost believe what you just typed here. So your wife participating in a morning online devotion automatically equates to her "dishonoring you"? Wow. Well I will not say much.

That is the reason why we encounter so many issues in our relationships and marriages. People forget that sex is spiritual. It is like a sacred ritual between two people. When you have sex, there is a form of bonding, fluids are exchanged. And when the Bible talked about no sex before marriage, the Bible wasn't kidding. But we humans think that we are smarter than God, so we circumvent everything, forgetting that there was a reason why God said no sex before marriage.

Hahahahahahahahahahahahaha 🤣. Shebi Nigerians are good at soiling our country's reputation, let them keep on soiling it. What Nigerians forget is that you can fool Nigerians in Nigeria, but you cannot fool the whites, as they are much more intelligent than us. We forge virtually anything in Nigeria, the institutions cannot even be trusted anymore. Nigerians should brace up as japa will only get harder because we have refused to do the right thing. Let's be United and fix Nigeria, iro, Nigerians with their selfish interests will not United to fix Nigeria. Rather they will be looking for money to run away. We run away from problems. That's what the average Nigerian does. We are effed up in this country, and until we do the right thing, we will continue to be effed up.