₦airaland Forum

No no Dr go away, let this nurse attend to me, something is wrong................. Am breathing in and breathing out.

If dis kyn soldiers dey ur area, u are naturally discourage to even look at d pot not to talk of stealing meat.

Corruption giving a speech on how to get rid of himself

When I saw bunch of banana I had to come and check which one the op was talking about, then gbam!.....................(silence)..............................oh its not the other one!

EVILFOREST:
FAT is a PLAGUE.
It will be very difficult for FAT people to enter the kingdom of heaven because NARROW is the path that leads to heaven.

Actually it still fit difficult for her to enter o cos am sure d angel will be telling her she doesn't look like her pishure that's in d book of life and maybe she is just a female nairalander from sexuality section trying to enter heaven as lepacious Bose after asari dokubo and obasanjo av entered as pastor adeboye and kumuyi, Jonathan keeps jumping the queue and buhari keeps complaining to angel Micheal about how Jonathan made him forget hiS I.d card.

Hehehehe killer what!.... Omg I thinks working, I can't feel my toes..............................................................oh iyaf died!.......................................................no wait! Am not dead! Its because I was wearing toes I couldn't feel my socks. Buahahahhaha killer curves, me sef get killer curves na.

It takes a thief to trace another thief's footsteps on a rock, Mr supervisor! Hmmmm!

misspicy:
Our society is not ready to accept that a woman can voice out her sexuality just like her male counterpart.

Its a man's world and social media is like the only place women (feminist) are allowed or free to voice out their opinion because of the anonymity


Trust me,its worst when you talk about crushing on a guy with people,they give you this "Ashawo" look



I believe we will get there someday

Lol giving u d look right now!

Nigeria doesn't even generate revenue from cattle o, yet they wanna give d herdsmen grazing patches in every damn states, now imagine how the people on whose land we get crude oil and we close eyes to d situation there.

Federal system isn't just working and nobody is ready to claim responsibility for exploiting people, destroying their land,livelihood and still neglecting them. do u know what oil spillage and gas flaring has caused to some people's land? Yet u expect them to keep quiet and continue to scream one Nigeria.
My opinion: even if we ain't going to break up, there is need to go back to d drawing board, accept act of negligence to adequately care for some people and some regions, correct our mistakes. Then yes we can now think of trusting ourselves and saying one Nigeria. As of now! I don't wanna hear dat shit anymore.

the guy above me tho.

I will wake up from my dream in my tent at warfront and go pee outside. Why is this even in politics section?
If u are posted to borno, goodluck finding a chick like dis, d ones u will see are small black ugly gurls carrying bombs.

I like this op! He represents the reason why our economy is bad

Met her on 2go lol and it wasn't b4 amalgamation in 1914

Audray:
*teary eyed* At the National library ABJ. I can never forget that stupid book i absent mindedly borrowed *sobs*
U guys should bear with me. I'm not a very good liar...

Ride on ma'am, am digesting ur lies hook line and sinker with pop corn.

It depends! If she is someone dat will upgrade her demands after I tell her, then I'll divide d actual Amount by 2.

Akinonnairaland:
A man may want you because a part of him feels drawn and attracted to you, but, you’re not interested in this guy.
You want to tell him to stop, you just don't know the best way to. Here some tips that will help you in turning down a guy nicely without necessarily being mean about it. No one likes a meanie, and that reputation might prevent a good guy from ever approaching you. Forget what you see in the movies.

Be Honest, Just Say No
Honesty is the best policy! You can be honest and still be nice, and believe me he’ll appreciate it in the long run, and wont have anything bad to say about you. A simple line like



Now remember it’s not exactly what you say but how you say it. Some Nigerian girls can say this simple statement with a lot of facial expression that leaves a man in tears. No need to be rude, or act like everyone has been disturbing you all night. Just be cordial and let him know

Offer The Friendzone
Now this works more so with someone you already know (a coursemate, reading partner, church member, family friend etc.) but it could also work with someone you meet. The standard “we can still be friends” or “I look at you as a brother” always works to soften the blow of rejection, and most guys will either take the hint, or take the friendzone status. Either way you’re off the hook… for now.
Warning: Most of the guys around this days hate it when you try to friendzone them, they push to make you "a friend with benefits" so you really need to becareful.
The magic word is:



Claim To Be Dating Someone Else
Yes I know this is risky, especially if this person already knows/thinks you’re single, but it’s worth a shot. “I have a boyfriend”, or better yet “I’m engaged” will work wonders for you most times. A lot of guys will quickly give you a nice smile, and tell you how lucky your imaginary man is. What about the guy that persists with some lame “what that gotta do with me” line? Tell him you expected more from a guy of his kind, he will shrink and apologize. Hey! You tried being nice once.
Warning: If you know you have a thing for him, do not try playing this card because if you turned in later, he will look at you like some girl who cheated on her guy with him. Some guys can be like that.


Give Him Toke’s Facial Expression
He says: "I have feelings for you Toke, feelings that i think..." and then the face. This face will make any guy go away quickly! stop laughing to yourself jo and learn how to be nice with those guys you don't want to be with but won't let you be. Shout out to Toke Makinwa.

Hey, what are you waiting for? Share with your friends jo.


For More Relationship Updates and Tips, Please Add-up this
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Answer back:
1. If Jesus say yes, baby who are u to say no.
2. What! Friendzone? dats like the most offensive thing, everybody just about it on social media.
3. Dating someone else? Haaaa! Come on ya not dating up to ur potential, try me.
4. Are we making funny faces? Awwww dats cute.

What! ran into the thread with big container of vaseline, discovered no no no! dAshes out again!

Ehmmmmm! Op should I use my money to buy toothpaste or suya?

He should jump first, then everybody will turn back and we will choose another president.

If we are going to be naked in heaven with this kind of bae, I hope I won't be send to hell bai! ayayai papin

AreaFada2:
Dude, this is Forest Cobra AKA Black Cobra AKA Black & White lipped cobra. Very dangerous, extremely defensive and has copious amount of venom in a bite.

I have seen it swimming in water, in a river flowing through the forest. It usually lives in the forest and not seen too much around homes. The birds were the reason for coming.

Sir! U are boss! Give this prof snake pepper soup and a cold beer.

Snakealand

Johnnyessence:
I am proud to be from Osun, glad Aregbesola is our governor. What more could we ask for. Four breathtaking bridges at a go, by one governor! Haa, this one open me mouth o. O ya mi lenu lo nje bee.

nonseeeeeeense! Shey na bridge workers go chop? Abi if he no pay them money to buy food and fuel how dey wan drive or even waka over d bridge.
How will those for bridge even generate the revenue needed? Displacement of priority they worry aregbe rascal.

The possibility of my girlfriend knocking me out on dat spot is high.

She dey count his pix? Well if she is checking out all his pics to no. 36 or so, then something smells fishy and its not aunty Linda!
In reminisce voice; ti o BA grade to, to BA diss me ko si reply.

The party is now like headless chicken but wetin party leaders wan go appeal to pmb for? So cct can release their grip on saraki's Balls abi?

Me me me! Check my pant! Uuuhhhh mehn AMA guy.

Toxic people everywhere it takes a toxicity to trace a toxic person's footprints on a rock. Swiftly sipped my Pepsi in fast! Ohhhhh brain freeze.

U have to budget suya money, call card, sharwama, pizza, and other non revenue generating spending every month. And then u still get, let's wait till our wedding Nite! AISSH!

The two guys wey climb d ladder supposed carry long thick cane along and beat is life blue black on the way down ni.
In my street where boys have learnt to throw all kinds of things at the pole when their line drop, if they catch him ehn, he for wish say dem lynch am. They even fit throw am mortal sef.

HE woke up, removed his pyjamas and lucky panties, wrapped himself with dat cloth to bathe and gbam! He found himself in d house. .