₦airaland Forum

SonofGod231:
■ A lady left her 345k Oil and gas job in Ph to be with the husband in Lagos. If you value your marriage you would leave that Job and go start a life together with your husband. If not you should have just stayed single and face your work.

You never mentioned what became of the lady?

MumEmdy:
■ Kobojunkie, the guy said he has changed for good and from his writeup I didn't see where he said he attack his wife back rather he allow her to attack him instead and he also admitted his wrongs. Let's try to show a little bit of love and kindness to a friend who is weak and in need..

You are one of those naive bits of humans out there, aren't you? Just hope neither you nor your children ever encounter the kinds of manipulative beings that the world outside of your home and mind are filled with.

Person dey dey literally tell you A and absolutely A but you dey blindly read B and only B from the same text. Na special talent your kind get be that. I can't imagine why for the life of me.

Mimicle101:
■ Am used to your way of thinking

If you were, you wouldn't come here writing noxious poems about how you supposedly loved a woman whom you helped turn into an abuser and a monster in marriage. You wouldn't open your trap to blame your wickedness on addiction. Addicts are not wicked people. Rather, wicked people who turn addicts are those who do what you did to your wife and kids in the name of love.

soulhelper481:
■Had it been she didn't leave you, you wouldn't have change. That's why every woman in her shoe or mine have to leave.

He afflicted his woman till she eventually became a monster and an abuser to him. Imagine that! Then he claims she would have helped change him if she had remained in that abusive environment with him, but he never mentioned how he would go about helping her change back from the monster and abuser he helped turn her into.

1. His adopted son's wife

LOL....🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 And that is different how? 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

MumEmdy:
■ Now that you have changed why not go back and beg her to come back to you, I'm glad you know it was your actions or rather gambling that trigger all her reactions towards you.
■ I sincerely want to congratulate you for being able to conquer that gambling spirit that tormented your life and destroyed your marriage and I also pray your wife sees reasons to embrace you back again Cheers!!!

1. Go back and beg for the woman whom he helped turn into an abuser and a monster to return to him. This time around, if one of them ends up dead, will you be there to open your mouth that you were one of those who suggested they get back together?

By the way, the guy is still struggling, probably missing the pillow that used to support the weight of his abuse. If another woman were to get caught in that net, you would find that the memories of the other wife would probably all but disappear overnight. Care to send your own daughter into that web?

Mimicle101:
■Yes she left.. I regreted it all. And i took the blame for the fact that i became Sick. And I am grateful to God all mighty that today I am getting better ( better from the abuse and crisis i recived in place of love). I am yet to fully recover financially But i still believed that my healling maybe would have came sooner if i had a support system in the person of my own wife. Rather she choosed to forsake me when i was afflicted and needed help. Its always about the Money. Nothing else matters.
At the point where she left was when she got tired of supporting the house. she was cooking and eating with our child alone. she stopped being a wife.. its was oky. i never bordered her as i took it as the punishment to who i had become. Untill she extended it with violent. i cant really remember how it all became physical but one thing i know is i hated seeing her tears. so she would attack and hit me. slap me at a heated argument. i refused to hit her back. instead i restrained her from on few occasions from inflicting permanent damage on me. .
She was my world. I cant tell you one single reason why i love her but i love her more than myself . its still 7 months now. no day passes i dont think about her. I would do anything for her happiness. What i explained above... I dont expect most Nigerian woman including the Nigga ....who commented above me to understand it.
■ People always rush to use the word Abuse when men are involved. laugh. Do you know the pain it feels when a mother would collect meat that a father gave to his 2 years old son and throw it away in front of the boys father? not once but 2 different occasions. Does 2 wrong make right? I accepts all my wrongs... Dont you think things would have been more different if A wrong behaviour is handled with a right behaviour?

You literally helped turn the woman into a monster and an abuser, probably a complete shadow of her old self, yet you want us to believe it was all for the love you have for her?

2. Isn't the one wrong already too much for so many to bear?

As for what you said of people having a heart for people struggling with addiction, I can confidently tell you that addiction is one problem, wickedness is another when it comes to those who burden others with their demons.

For many many years of my life, I too had struggled with several demons of my own. Rather than burden those around me with them, I took to running as far away from them as I could in order not to hurt them with my problems. I kept contact and tried the best I could to explain but I made sure to stay away from having the pain of me inflicted on them in any way or form. You, on the other hand, literally sat your demon on the heads of your wife and children, and worse, expected them to happily deal with it in the name of the "loving" you, yet you dare wish for us to imagine you a bare with understanding of what it means to love others. That was not the addiction at work but wickedness on your part.

AntiChristian:
■ I am a Muslim not a Mohammedan! And yes! A father-in-law can't marry her daughter-in-law.
■ If this your assertion is correct why did Gen 38 ends with Judah did not sleep with her again? It means it is not right but Judah was never punished like his sons!
■ So harlotry is permitted in Genesis 38?
■ Some Yorubas too do this kind of inheritance of wives by brothers some centuries back! Alhamdulillah! Eyes don open!

1. That is like saying I am a follower of Jesus Christ without being a worshipper of Jesus Christ. E no work! Also, Mohammed did marry his daughter-in-law.

2. Judah did not sleep with her again for reasons best known to him. His personal grudges may have contributed to it, however, none of that makes for right or wrong where God is concerned.

3. Again, Sin is defined by God in His Law and God’s LE revealed in Scripture at the time contained only a few commandments;none of them against harlotry.

4. If inheritance of the kind you describe used to be culture for some, OK. I personally believe individuals get to create or choose whatever culture they desire within the constraints of the law.

Emm4:
Woman Shares Death Experience, Says she saw 4 grandparents who died before she was born and she KNEW them.
Another person who died and came back also confirmed her story.

So long as she no claim to have visited heaven or hell, she can claim whatever she wants.

soulhelper481:
■ Sir, I would love to ask. In your case, Did you wife left you? And at what point did you realize and stop?
Honestly, no woman who experience the life of a chronic gambler husband, can respect him. The effects are traumatizing. I can't even explain the level of anger they generate with that lifestyle

Why does it matter to you whether his wife left him or not? Are you now wanting to become like her and model your marriage after his? You dey hear story from the man who abused his wife and you take that as some sort of upside down wisdom you should pay mind to? You are not at all tired of your situation!

AntiChristian:
■ Can your father-in-law commit adultery with you and get you impregnated?
■ Onan spilled the seed outside and was killed! The father spilled the seed inside and wasn't killed! The father committed harlotry and wasn't killed. The father committed hypocrisy wanting to kill her daughter-in-law for her getting pregnant not knowing the harlotry he committed resulted in the pregnancy!
■ Of course, she was inherited! How many men slept with her in Genesis 38 only? 1.Er 2. Onan and 3. their father Judah! When Er died, Onan inherited her as wife. When Onan died the she had to wait for the third born to start sleeping with her too! What sort of inspiration is these?

1. Is this comment coming from someone who is a Mohammedan?

2. I don't follow your digest of this at all. Onan and the previous son were dead. Was this woman somehow eternally married to the man or what? Judah was her father-in-law only as long as she was a part of that family but she was no longer that.

3. Judah's wife was dead and so he was free from the marriage to his wife. He slept with Tamar who posed as a prostitute at the time, what in the world is committing harlotry for Pete's sake? Why do you think it is OK to invent sins where there are none?

4. Look, the God of Israel did not impose His Covenant(and statutes) which he made only with the people of Israel while in the desert as they entered the land of Canaan over people of other nations/foreigners of the earth. So, don't for one moment pretend any of this you do or claim has to do with Him.

lawani:
■ They can do it if the locals advise them to do that otherwise they would do things the way they do it in their own countries. It is just what any human being would do. If someone important suggests that you do something not costly before you proceed then you would be smart to follow the advise

Now this response of yours makes way more sense than the claims made by others suggesting oyinbo companies believe in many of the same spiritual mumbo jumbo Nigerians cling to.

BluntCrazeMan:
■ In your own example above, does that also mean that Oyibos are NOT babalawos? (That one person is enough not to generalize in any direction).You generalized in one direction. I bursted your generalization.You now came back to say that I was generalizing in the other direction,, WHICH IS NOT TRUE.. I didn't generalize.I was just pointing out to you that the fact you mentioned OYINBO in order to talk down the sacrifice to water-bodies is not a strong point in favour of your argument.

arggh, I see! So you think my statement regarding an Oyinbo company coming to dam a a particular water was a generalization. Here's a question for you then, name one such company whose policy is to carry out rituals before damming a particular body of water and we go from there.

BluntCrazeMan:
■ You claimed they don't it. I'm telling you that I saw one who did it.... You're now free to conclude anything.
But count out those who usually do it.

So, if I see one oyinbo man babalawo I am free to conclude that Oyinbos are babalawos? Are you for real? You aren't even allowed to make such a generalization regarding Nigerians yet you think it makes sense to do so with a whole race of people? Come on!

BluntCrazeMan:
■ What I saw with my eyes.!!...
Bye.
I never intended to convince you.
I just typed what I saw, the way I saw it.

So you see all oyinbo people into this one situation which you claim?

What you typed is akin t

BluntCrazeMan:
■ The oyibo people do sacrifices..
Even for building bridges over small streams,, they kill animals and let the blood flow from ground into the small stream.

The stories you people tell yourselves all in a bid to remain ignorant never ceases to amaze..

Morbeta11:
■ Speaking on the church’s third service-themed ‘Covenant Day of Fruitfulness’, Oyedepo Jr. urged Christians to take cover in covenant stewardship.
He said, “If you raised an empty Ghana-much-go bag in a windy environment, it would fly away, but if you have a heavy substance in it, no matter the hash wind, it would resist it.
“The same applies to an individual without convenant practice in Christ Jesus; such an individual would be affected by the wind of current hardship.”

Meanwhile, the Presiding Bishop of the Church, Dr. David Oyedepo, while urging Christians to reach out to the needy around them to mitigate the economic hardship, disclosed that the church has opened several Kingdom Care outlets to reach out to the needy through its Winners Satellite Fellowship (WSF) across Nigeria and insisted on saying, “If your vehicle broke down on the highway, it is not a thing of shame asking for help.
“It is not a weakness to ask for help when needed.” The bishop said:

This is business for this man as always. Ever using the name of God in vain.

Peakdesign23:
Some women are just struggling, suffering and smiling, all in the name of marriage. Madam run for your life.

All na to win the "Successful marriage" award naw! Na till death!

soulhelper481:
■ The present accomodations we have, I paid for it and it's expiring towards ending of the year. But I want to peaceful give him some distance to regain myself. Family members have adviced him and they're all tired. I need help. I can't even sleep comfortably in the night, I'm always afraid he might hurt me because of everyday quarrel and disapproval. I want to be alive to take care of my children.
Pls I need to go away. I need help. I'm in Abuja. I need accomodation, I want to be able to breathe. I'm suffocating here. I have tried all I could, but he's not willing to change. His family members (his mom) testified he has this habit even from the university. It's a long story. I have been trying to save an addict, but all my efforts, wasted. Now, he's acting violent with me. I don't want to move to my family house because he will start coming over and acting like he has change. As usual.

Sadly, your kind of story is a dime a dozen... so many women out there in pretty much the same marital self-created quagmire you happen to be in. The man has been this way since university yet you saw fit to have kids with him and even pay the bill all this while to feed and probably cloth him. Good, you are finally tired but I see you are looking for someone to help you get a brief vacation from him after which you head right back in to continue the "endurance" show you call marriage. Well, my suggestion to you would be that you head back to your parent's home for the time being. But since you don't seem completely done with this man at all (you are still open to him coming to you with tales of having changed), you could head over to your in-laws' place and let them home you until you are ready to head back into endurance mode again. Good luck!

Plus1234:
■ go and sit down ,you are boring and an id*ot.I doubt you are a Christian,I doubt your mum is a deeperlifer. You look like a Muslim using Taqqiya to deceive and cause confusion here especially for Christians.Maybe you have issues in your head and you didn’t complete your drug in Aro.Don’t you have a job? Spamming all Christian topics ,Are you delusional? Are you the devil himself in human body? Do you have health related issues in the head? Are you suicidal? Are you just confused? If you have any of the listed issues above,seek help immediately.I see you running inside the market pantless.

These are most definitely the words of a true Christian and a certified Churchian to boot. Congratulations are in order !

Plus1234:
■ go and sit down ,you are boring and an id*ot.I doubt you are a Christian,I doubt your mum is a deeperlifer. You look like a Muslim using Taqqiya to deceive and cause confusion here especially for Christians.
● Maybe you have issues in your head and you didn’t complete your drug in Aro.Don’t you have a job? Spamming all Christian topics ,Are you delusional? Are you the devil himself in human body? Do you have health related issues in the head? Are you suicidal? Are you just confused? If you have any of the listed issues above,seek help immediately.I see you running inside the market pantless.

I found here yet another perfect example of a true Christian and a certified Churchian.

ricson11:
■ At 68 years old, a woman has given birth to her first child, prompting well-deserved congratulations

A baby at 68? I can imagine this child at 10-years-of-age already burdened with caring for his 78-year-old mother. I can't even imagine what his teenage years will look like. I truly hope this woman is rich with lots of servants at least.

Negroid001:
■ Why must it be misinterpreted?
■ Why so many conflicting sects and denominations?
■ Why so many unaligned and not corresponding translations?
■ Why isn't the whole Christendom united?

1. The problem isn't at all that the contents of the book are misinterpreted but rather that those who claim to read resort to interpretating all of it when that need only be applied to say visions and dreams.

2. It is the same reason for why most evey religion out there equally boasts of so many conflicting sects/cults and denominations. Power! Fight for supremacy of doctrine and traditions.

3. Like I already stated, the translations --- those of course not created with dubious intentions --- aren't the issue here since I can post the same content from different translations and they would all have the same base meaning. The problem comes in when folks resort to applying additional interpretations when none is needed.

4. Name one religion out there that is united? Look, division is a result of the politics of men. Religion is political -- every single one of them.

Bigseven:
■ you are so delusional and myopic as you keep twisting my position thinking that you are making sense meanwhile you’re not. Get a life bro. You’ve asked what if it’s my brother and I clearly make you understand in simple terms that I advise the lady same way. Bring a man’s scenario side by side a woman that cheats is inconsequential because you and I know our gender has been placed on the advantage side in all ramifications as far as marriage is concerned especially Africa. But No one deserve to die in depression because of marriage; why twisting words as if my position was on the man ? I guess when a limited knowledge meets superior knowledge blabbing becomes the norm and that’s exactly what you are spewing.
Anyways I’m not ready for useless arguments and conversations. Besides I wasn’t advising you in the first place. If my position pains you as a cheat then focus on your cheating and stop misunderstanding and misquoting me please

So in all, your advice, albeit from what you consider realistic, comes laden with a huge dollop of misogyny, just as I have pointed out all the while.

Negroid001:
■ I'm enjoying the spectacle. Confusion has come in the midst of the brethren. That's what you get when you put your whole life on a false book full of fallacies and errors.
■ Let the disarray continue.

The problem isn't the book nor the information contained in the book. The book is not itself full of fallacies and errors, no more than any other book out there mind you. Rather, the confusion stems from the fact that these people completely abandon their ability to reason and comprehend following human language rules when they attend to the information contained inside of the book. And please note, the book in no way suggests nor encourages this ludicrous ritual of theirs.

The disarray is born of religion — the many superficial interpretations of men — and not of the book at all.

Lawag3:
■ The OP you're chatting with is clearly insane. But I don't expect you to notice that.

So those whom you specially deem insane have no need to be told the facts, is that it?

Bigseven:
I’m a realist and of course if it’s my brother I’ll do same by telling her the same thing moved on and ignore him. After all no marriage in heaven. Live every moment and make it count and don’t tie your happiness to another man cos I won’t allow someone’s daughter to suffer. You actually have limited understanding that’s why are still insisting on the one the last part of my instead of understanding the whole point. I think let leave you with what you felt you understood but you didn’t. I’m sure if the OP follow our conversation she’ll know what to peak and what to trash. So Dey your Dey man

My realist, so if your brother's wife or son's wife were cheating on him, you would equally advice him to....

Bigseven:
■ Men are afraid of silence of a woman that is been pushed to the wall. Simple tips: ■ Don’t ever confront him again, ■ give him space, ignore him concentrate on your children and yourself. ■ Start dressing well and take good care of yourself. ■ Don’t ever give him money again. ■ Keep him in silent treatment. ■ Take yourself out on dates along. But remember don’t cheat back or try to revenge because two wrongs don’t make a right. Lastly pray Always to God for inner strength and peace then watch how he will be restored to his default settings. DM me so we can talk more

...equally remain in the marriage but adopt the following attitudes towards her
● Ignore the cheating wife
● Never confront her, give her space, and concentrate on his children and himself
● Dress himself well and take good care of himself
● No longer give his wife money
● Give his wife the silent treatment
● Take himself out on dates
● never cheat on her

Bigseven:
■o you mean if it’s your sister you’ll tell her she has to deal with it Obviously you a mirror to her post on cheat. You sound heartless like her cheating husband.

But OP has been the one dealing with the consequences of her husband's cheating for the past 6 years? Why are you so unmoved by any of what she has revealed here? It doesn't seem to concern you at all that the one who has been languishing in mental anguish has been OP over what her husband has been doing to her in marriage.

If OP was your son or brother, would you equally be here dishing out the very same advice, complete with the many shackles you desperately wish for OP to continue to wear on her?

GreatVocalist:
Money is the only thing stopping me from doing this. My football dream was dashed by the demon called coronary artery disease.

Sickness is no demon but a problem that can in many cases be treated.

lawani:
∆ Prior to Paul nobody was saying a Hausa man died for the Yoruba and stuff like that. No one died willingly for anybody. You can die fighting though. If fire fell on mother and child, the mother will take Care of herself first

What statement of Paul's are you referring to? Paul said Jesus Christ died for the Lost Sheep of Israel -- for the Jewish tribes as well as the other Gentile tribes of Israel. The assumption that Paul's particular mention of the gentiles applied to non-Israelites is not to be blamed on Paul though. That much I know.

lawani:
■ Apostle Paul founded something and that thing was a religion but not the type currently practiced. It is more similar to Jehovah witness. If he did not found it there would be no religion today

What I believe. Paul instead did was give his opinions on how issues should be handled among believers. Many of those opinions were not aligned with Jesus Christ but they were opinions nonetheless. There is no evidence to support the claim for Paul actually founding a religion or movement of his own though. So I don't believe it fair to consider Paul to blame for Christianity.

lawani:
■ You are inferring that Jesus Christ did not found Christianity and that is correct. He did not open a single church. He was a kind of Jewish nationalist or racist that wants nothing to do with Gentiles.
■ Christianity was founded by Paul as a laid back group but the Roman empire turned it into a monstrous tool of politics.

I am not inferring at all. I stated that Jesus Christ never did any such. There is no evidence for the many claims that He did any such.

2. Christianity was not founded by Paul either. He simply wrote letters which were then hijacked by a pagan movement desperate for a political system with which to rule over the people of their time. The group of rogue Bishops, as I like to call them, had their cause legitimized by the Roman emperor Constantine, and so the world we have today was born.