Labans's Posts
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 Jokes Etc › How Men Change by Labans(op): 5:28pm On Feb 15, 2007 |
The Love Word: After 6 weeks: I looo-ve you, I love you, I love you! After 6 months: Of course, I love you. After 6 years: GOD, if I didn't love you, then why did I marry you? Back from Work: After 6 weeks: Honey, I'm home! After 6 months: I'm BACK!! After 6 years: Have you cooked yet? Phone Ringing: After 6 weeks: Baby, somebody wants you on the phone. After 6 months: Here, it's for you. After 6 years: ANSWER THE PHONE DAM*T!! Cooking: After 6 weeks: I never knew food could taste so good! After 6 months: What are we having for dinner tonight? After 6 years: DUMPLING AGAIN?? New Dress: After 6 weeks: Wow, you look like an angel in that dress. After 6 months: You bought a new dress again? After 6 years: How much did THAT cost me? TV: After 6 weeks: Baby, what would you like us to watch tonight? After 6 months: I like this movie. After 6 years: I'm going to watch the SHARKS play, if you're not in the mood, go to bed, I can stay up by myself! Making LOVe: After 6 weeks: Baby, I want you tonight? After 6 months: Lets make another baby, my mother just called!!! After 6 years: Please MOVE over to your side, I'm suffocating here!!!! |
| Jokes Etc › Don't Kick The Animals by Labans(op): 12:55pm On Feb 07, 2007 |
A boy awoke and wanted breakfast so he told his mother. She said, "Not until you feed the animals." The boy went outside and said to the chicken, "I don't feel like feeding you today." So he kicked the chicken. He did the same with the cow and the pig. The boy then went back into the house and told his mother he was hungry. His mother said, "I saw you kick the chicken so you're not getting any eggs, I saw you kick the cow so you're not getting any milk and I saw kick the pig so you're not getting any bacon." Just then the boy's father walked down the steps and tripped over and kicked the cat and the boy said, "Mom should I tell him?" |
| Jokes Etc › General by Labans(op): 12:47pm On Feb 07, 2007 |
Note this is an exact replication of National Public Radio interview between a female broadcaster and Nigeria Army General Bans, who was about to sponsor a Boy Scout Troop visiting his military installation. FEMALE INTERVIEWER: So, General Bans, what things are you going to teach these young boys when they visit your post? GENERAL BANS: We're going to teach them climbing, canoeing, archery, and shooting. FEMALE INTERVIEWER: Shooting! That's a bit irresponsible, isn't it? GENERAL BANS: I don't see why, they'll be properly supervised on the rifle range. FEMALE INTERVIEWER: Don't you admit that this is a terribly dangerous activity to be teaching children? GENERAL BANS: I don't see how. We will be teaching them proper rifle discipline before they even touch a firearm. FEMALE INTERVIEWER: But you're equipping them to become violent killers ! GENERAL BANS: Well, you're equipped to be a prostitute, but you're not one , are you? |
| Jokes Etc › The Game by Labans(op): 12:41pm On Feb 07, 2007 |
The game of choice for unemployed people or maintenance level workers is basketball. The game of choice for frontline workers is football. The game of choice for middle management is tennis. The game of choice for CEOs and executives is golf. Conclusion: The higher up on the corporate ladder you are, the smaller your balls are. |
| Jokes Etc › A Minister by Labans(op): 12:39pm On Feb 07, 2007 |
A minister waited in line to have his car filled with gas just before a long holiday weekend. The attendant worked quickly, but there were many cars ahead of him in front of the service station. Finally, the attendant motioned him toward a vacant pump. "Reverend," said the young man, "Sorry about the delay. It seems as if everyone waits until the last minute to get ready for a long trip." The minister chuckled, "I know what you mean. It's the same in my business." |
| Jokes Etc › Two Confirmed Bachelors by Labans(op): 12:36pm On Feb 07, 2007 |
Two confirmed bachelors sat talking. Their conversation drifted from politics to cooking. "I got a cookbook once," said the first, "but I could never do anything with it." "Too much fancy cooking in it, eh?" asked the second. "You said it. Every one of the recipes began the same way - "Take a clean dish and, " |
| Jokes Etc › The Senator by Labans(op): 1:40pm On Feb 05, 2007 |
While walking down the street one day, a senator is tragically hit by a truck and killed. His soul arrives in Heaven and is met by St. Peter at the entrance. "Welcome to Heaven," says St. Peter. "Before you settle in, it seems there is a problem. We seldom see a high official around these parts, you see, so we're not sure what to do with you." "No problem, just let me in," says the senator. "Well, I'd like to, but I have orders from higher up. What we'll do is have you spend one day in Hell and one in Heaven. Then you can choose where to spend eternity." "There's no need! I want to be in Heaven," says the senator. "I'm sorry, but we have our rules." And with that, St. Peter escorts him to the elevator, the doors open, and he rides the elevator down, down, down. When the doors open again, the senator finds himself in the middle of a beautiful green golf course. In the distance is a club, and standing in front of it are all his friends and other politicians who had worked with him. Everyone is very happy and in formal dress. They run to greet him, and they reminisce about the good times they had while getting rich at the expense of the people. They play a friendly game of golf and then dine on lobster and caviar. Also present is the Devil, who is a very friendly guy who has a good time dancing and telling jokes. They are having such a good time that, before the senator realizes it, it is time to go. Everyone gives him a big hug and waves while the elevator rises. The elevator goes up, up, up, and the door reopens in Heaven where St. Peter is waiting for him. So 24 hours pass with the senator joining a group of contented souls moving from cloud to cloud, playing the harp and singing. They have a good time and, before he realizes it, the 24 hours have gone by, and St. Peter returns. "Well, you've spent a day in Hell and another in Heaven. Now, you must choose where you want to spend eternity." He reflects for a minute and then answers, "Well, I would never would have thought it, I mean Heaven has been delightful, but I think I would be better satisfied in Hell." So Saint Peter escorts him to the elevator, and down, down, down he goes into Hell. Now, the doors of the elevator open, and he is in the middle of a barren land covered with waste and garbage. He sees all his friends dressed in rags, picking up the trash and putting it in black bags. And it's hot, hot, hot, and the odor is just horrible. Sweltering hot. Hot and miserable. The Devil comes over to him and smoothly lays his arm around his shoulder. "I don't understand," stammers the senator. "The day before I was here, and there was a golf course and club, and we ate lobster and caviar and danced and had a great time. Now all there is is a wasteland full of garbage, and my friends look miserable." The Devil looks at the senator, smiles, and says, "Yesterday we were campaigning. Today you voted for us." |
| Jokes Etc › Music by Labans(op): 1:25pm On Feb 05, 2007 |
Apple Computer reported today that it has developed computer chips that can store and play music inside women's breasts . This is considered to be a major breakthrough because women are always complaining about men staring at their breasts, and not listening to them." |
| Jokes Etc › The Drunk by Labans(op): 1:12pm On Feb 05, 2007 |
The Drunk An extremely modest man was in the hospital for a series of tests, the last of which had left his bodily systems extremely upset. Upon making several false alarm trips to the bathroom, he decided the latest episode was another and stayed put. He suddenly filled his bed with diarrhea and was embarrassed beyond his ability to remain rational. In a complete loss of composure he jumped out of bed, gathered up the bed sheets, and threw them out the hospital window. A drunk was walking by the hospital when the sheets landed on him. He started yelling, cursing, and swinging! his arms violently trying to get the unknown things off, and ended up with the soiled sheets in a tangled pile at his feet. As the drunk stood there, unsteady on his feet, staring down at the sheets, a hospital security guard (barely containing his laughter) who had watched the whole incident walked up and asked, "What the heck is going on here?" The drunk, still staring down replied: "I think I just beat the shit out of a ghost". |
| Jokes Etc › Local Police Station by Labans(op): 5:19pm On Feb 02, 2007 |
Local Police Station Little Davies's kindergarten class was on a field trip to their local police station where they saw pictures tacked to a bulletin board of the 10 most wanted criminals. One of the youngsters pointed to a picture and asked if it really was the photo of a wanted person. "Yes," said the policeman. "The detectives want very badly to capture him." Little Davie asked, "Why didn't you keep him when you took his picture?" |
| Jokes Etc › Men Are Like: by Labans(op): 5:15pm On Feb 02, 2007 |
Men are like, 1. Men are like , Laxatives , They irritate the crap out of you. 2. Men are like, Bananas, The older they get, the less firm they are. 3. Men are like , Weather, Nothing can be done to change them. 4. Men are like , Blenders, You need One, but you're not quite sure why. 5. Men are like , Chocolate Bars , Sweet, smooth, & they usually head right for your hips. 6. Men are like , Commercials , You can't believe a word they say. 7. Men are like , Department Stores , Their clothes are always 1/2 off. 8. Men are like , Government Bonds , They take soooooooo long to mature. 9. Men are like , Mascara, They usually run at the first sign of emotion. 10. Men are like , Popcorn, They satisfy you, but only for a little while. 11. Men are like, Snowstorms , You never know when they're coming, how many inches you'll get or how long it will last. 12. Men are like , Lava Lamps , Fun to look at, but not very bright. |
| Jokes Etc › Two Prostitutes by Labans(op): 5:08pm On Feb 02, 2007 |
Two prostitutes were riding around town with a sign on the roof of their car which read, "TWO PROSTITUTES, #1500.00." A policeman noticed the car, and quickly pulled them over. He approached the ladies and told them they'd have to remove the sign. Otherwise, they'd be arrested and taken to jail. Just then, another car passed by with a sign which read, "JESUS SAVES." The two ladies asked the policeman why he let the other car drive by without pulling them over. "Well, that's a little different since it pertains to religion." The two ladies were furious, but nonetheless they removed the sign and drove away. The next day, the same policeman noticed the same two ladies riding around town with a sign on the roof of their car. He figured he had an easy bust, so he pulled them over once again. As he approached the car, though, he noticed a new sign which now read, "TWO ANGELS SEEKING PETER, #1500.00." |
| Jokes Etc › A Married Couple In Their Early 60s by Labans(op): 1:47pm On Jan 31, 2007 |
A married couple in their early 60s was out celebrating their 35th wedding anniversary in a quiet, romantic little restaurant. Suddenly, a tiny yet beautiful fairy appeared on their table and said, "For being such an exemplary married couple and for being faithful to each other for all this time, I will grant you each a wish. "Oh, I want to travel around the world with my darling husband" said the wife. The fairy waved her magic wand and poof! - two tickets for the Queen Mary II luxury liner appeared in her hands. Then it was the husband's turn. He thought for a moment and said: "Well, this is all very romantic, but an opportunity like this will never come again. I'm sorry my love, but my wish is to have a wife 30 years younger than me." Both the wife and the fairy were deeply disappointed, but a wish is a wish. So the fairy waved her magic wand and - poof! - the husband became 92 years old. the moral of the story: Men who are ungrateful bastards should remember that fairies are female. |
| Jokes Etc › Two Young Lovers by Labans(op): 1:41pm On Jan 31, 2007 |
Two young lovers go up to the mountains for a romantic winter vacation. When they get to the cabin, the guy goes out to chop some wood to start the fireplace. When he gets back, he says, "Honey, my hands are freezing!" To that she replies "Well, come here and I?ll warm them between my legs." He goes out a couple of more times and does the same thing. After dinner, he goes out one more time to chop wood for the night. When he returns, he again says, "Honey, my hands are really freezing!" She looks at him and says, "For crying out loud, don't your ears ever get cold?" |
| Jokes Etc › Mr. Common Sense by Labans(op): 3:56pm On Jan 30, 2007 |
Mr. Sense had been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape. He will be remembered as having cultivated such value lessons as knowing when to come in out of the rain, why the early bird gets the worm and that life isn't always fair. Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you earn) and reliable Parenting strategies (adults, not kids, are in charge). His health began to rapidly deteriorate when well intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a six-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition. Mr. Sense declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent to administer aspirin to a student; but, could not inform the parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion. Finally, Common Sense lost the will to live as the Ten Commandments became contraband; churches became businesses; and criminals received better treatment than their victims. Common Sense finally gave up the ghost after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot, she spilled a bit in her lap, and was awarded a huge financial settlement. Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust, his wife, Discretion; his daughter, Responsibility; and his son, Reason. He is survived by two stepbrothers; My Rights and Ima Whiner. Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone. If you still remember him, pass this on; if not, join the majority and do nothing. |
| Jokes Etc › A Million Naira by Labans(op): 3:44pm On Jan 30, 2007 |
The train was travelling along when a beautiful young woman entered the compartment which was deserted except for a businessman reading his paper. The man peered over his paper and asked "Would you let me mess you for a naira?" "Certainly not!" exclaimed the young woman, and the businessman returned to his paper. A short while later he looked across again and said "Would you let me mess you for a million naira?" After a brief pause, the woman replied "yes, I suppose I would." Again the man returned to his newspaper. A few minutes later the man asked "Would you let me mess you for five naira?" "Certainly not!" replied the young woman, getting angry now "What kind of girl do you take me for?" "We've already established that" replied the man, "We're just haggling over the price!" |
| Jokes Etc › The Three Blowjobs by Labans(op): 5:06pm On Jan 29, 2007 |
There were these three guys named Rick, Bob and Tom, who were really good friends. One day they went out after just getting paid, having a few drinks together, as usual, when Rick says to the boys "Hey man, lets do something different for a change. I'm getting Hot and I heard about this place down the road. Let's check it out." So the 3 men agreed and jumped in Rick's pick-up. When they got there, they noticed there was a sign on the door that said 'Blow Jobs for #500, #600, & #700'. So Bob not having to much extra cash to spend said "I'll go first for 500 Naira to see if it's worth it." He goes up to the door and knocks, pulls out his five hundred naira bill and then enters the building. He was gone about 10 minutes when he comes back out of the door with a big 'ol grin on his face. Seeing this Tom says, "Damn man, how was it?" Bob said "That was the best damn Mouth Action I ever had! I'll never forget it!." So Tom said "Well, if it was that good, I'ma pay 600 naira!" He goes up to the door and knocks, pulls out his six hundred naira bill and then enters the building. He was gone about 30 minutes when he comes back out of the door with a big 'ol smile on his face. Rick seeing this says, "Damn man, how was it?" Tom said "That was the best damn Mouth Action I ever had! I'll never forget it! She put whip cream around my dick with a cherry on top! Best damn Mouth Action I ever had!" Rick said "Well damn, if it was that good, I'ma pay seven hundred naira!" So he goes up to the door and knocks, pulls out his seven hundred naira, and enters the building. He was gone about an hour when he comes back out of the door with a grin on his face from ear to ear. Bob now having composed himself, saw this, and said "Damn man, how was it?" Rick said "That was the best damn Mouth Action I ever had! I'll never forget it! She put whip cream around my dick, put a cherry on top, and that son of a bitch looked so damn good, I ate it myself! |
| Poems For Review › We Are Best Friends Forever by Labans(op): 4:50pm On Jan 29, 2007 |
You are my friend How we met is still hazy The exact time it became official is still a mystery No one erases destiny We were meant to be friends forever We have been through it all Name it, we have been there Argue? we have done that Fight, cry, break up? we have made up Long before we know it It's true, we can't change our destiny to be together, forever Come rain, come sunshine, we are as tight as unbreakable How we met might still remain fuzzy, But what remains certain is that We are best friends forever. |
| Poems For Review › As Long As There Is You by Labans(op): 1:39pm On Jan 26, 2007 |
Come with me Come take my hand You be my woman And I'll be your man We'll go some place Far away Make love all night Sleep all day We'll dine at a table With candle light Holding hands Into the night Then we'll sway to the music As it fills the air We'll keep on dancing Even if no one else is there I think it's plain to see Our love is so true There's no one else for me As long as there is you. |
| Poems For Review › Missing You by Labans(op): 1:26pm On Jan 26, 2007 |
I sit alone in a dark room tonight, the windows opened as I stare at the moonlight. Thoughts of you run through my mind, wondering where you are tonight. Feeling the breeze from the window, brush across my face. Imagining it being your touch , making my heart race. I miss you dearly, please know this is true. [color=Black]No one but you can light up this room other than the brightness of this moon[/color]. I am hoping, you hear my cry of loneliness come to me soon. |
| Jokes Etc › A Widowed Lady by Labans(op): 3:14pm On Jan 25, 2007 |
A widowed lady, Sarah, was sitting on a beach towel in Amuda Beach, Bonny. She looked up and noticed that a man her age had walked up, spread his blanket on the sand nearby, and had begun reading a book. Smiling, she attempted to strike up a conversation with him. "Hello, sir, how are you?" "Fine, thank you" he responded, and turned back to his book. "I love the beach. Do you come here often?" Sarah asked. "First time since my wife passed away last year" he replied, and again turned back to his book. "Do you live around here?" she asked. "Yes, I live over in Ishile" he answered, and resumed reading. Trying to find a topic of common interest, Sarah persisted. "Do you like pussycats?" With that, the man threw his book down, jumped off his blanket onto hers, tore off both their swimsuits and gave her the most passionate ride of her life! As the cloud of sand began to settle, Sarah gasped and asked the man "How did you know that was what I wanted?" The man replied "How did you know my name is Katz?" |
| Poems For Review › Widowed by Labans(op): 3:07pm On Jan 25, 2007 |
;d ;d ;d |
| Poems For Review › Cat by Labans(op): 2:50pm On Jan 25, 2007 |
:d :d |
| Jokes Etc › Re: Talking Dog by Labans(op): 2:32pm On Jan 25, 2007 |
Yeah lol  |
| Jokes Etc › Grandma & Grandpa by Labans(op): 3:24pm On Jan 24, 2007 |
Grandma and Grandpa were visiting their kids overnight. When Grandpa found a bottle of Viagra in His son's medicine cabinet, he asked about using one of the pills. The son said, "I don't think you should take one Dad; they're very strong and very expensive". "How much?" asked Grandpa. "$ 10.00 a pill," answered the son. "I don't care," said Grandpa, "I'd still like to try one, and before we leave in the morning, I'll put the money under the pillow." Later the next morning, the son found $110, 00 under the pillow. He called Grandpa and said, "I told you each pill was $10.00, not $110.00." "I know," said Grandpa. "The hundred is from Grandma." |
| Jokes Etc › A Frog by Labans(op): 3:16pm On Jan 24, 2007 |
A frog goes into a bank and approaches the teller. He can see from her nameplate that her name is Patricia Whack. "Miss Whack, I'd like to get a $30,000 loan to take a holiday." Patty looks at the frog in disbelief and asks his name. The frog says his name is Kermit Jagger, his dad is Mick Jagger, and that it's okay, he knows the bank manager. Patty explains that he will need to secure the loan with some collateral. The frog says, "Sure . I have this," and produces a tiny porcelain elephant, about an inch tall, bright pink and perfectly formed. Very confused, Patty explains that she'll have to consult with the bank manager and disappears into a back office. She finds the manager and says, "There's a frog called Kermit Jagger out there who claims to know you and wants to borrow $30,000, and he wants to use this as collateral." She holds up the tiny pink elephant. "I mean, what in the world is this?" , The bank manager looks back at her and says, "It's a knickknack, Patty Whack. Give the frog a loan. His old man's a Rolling Stone." |
| Jokes Etc › An Attorney by Labans(op): 3:14pm On Jan 24, 2007 |
An attorney got home late one evening, after a very taxing day trying to get a stay of execution for a client, James Wright, who was due to be hanged for murder at midnight. His last-minute plea for clemency to the governor had failed and he was feeling worn out and depressed. As soon as he got through the door at home, his wife started on him about, "What time of night do you call this? Where have you been?" And on and on. Too shattered to play his usual role in this familiar ritual, he went and poured himself a shot of whiskey and headed off for a long hot soak in the bathtub, pursued by the predictable sarcastic remarks. While he was in the bath, the phone rang. The wife answered and was told that her husband's client had been granted his stay of execution after all. Wright would not be hanged tonight. Finally realizing what a day he must have had, she decided to go upstairs to give him the good news. As she opened the bathroom door, she was greeted by the sight of her husband's rear end as he was bent over naked, drying his legs and feet. "They're not hanging Wright tonight," she said. He whirled around and screamed, "FOR CRYING OUT LOUD, WOMAN, DON'T YOU EVER STOP?" |
| Jokes Etc › Re: Talking Dog by Labans(op): 2:50pm On Jan 24, 2007 |
You can say that again Ladies |
| Jokes Etc › 3 Minute Management Course by Labans(op): 4:19pm On Jan 23, 2007 |
3 minute management course Lesson One! An eagle was sitting on a tree resting, doing nothing. A small rabbit saw the eagle and asked him, "Can I also sit like you and do nothing?" The eagle answered: "Sure, why not" So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the eagle and rested. All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit and ate it. Management Lesson: To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting very, very high up. Lesson Two: A turkey was chatting with a bull. "I would love to be able to get to the top of that tree," sighed the turkey, "but I haven't got the energy." "Well, why don't you nibble on some of my droppings?" replied the bull." They're packed with nutrients." The turkey pecked at a lump of dung, and found it actually gave him enough strength to reach the lowest branch of the tree. The next day he reached the second branch and, finally, after a fourth night, the turkey was proudly perched at the top of the tree. He was promptly spotted by a farmer, who shot him out of the tree. Management Lesson: Bullshit might get you to the top, but it won't keep you there. Lesson Three: A little bird was flying south for the winter. It was so cold, the bird froze and fell to the ground into a large field. there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on him. As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow dung, he began to realize how warm he was. The dung was actually thawing him out! He laid there all warm and happy, and soon began to sing for joy. A passing cat heard the bird singing and came to investigate. Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow dung, and promptly dug him out and ate him. Management Lesson : (1) Not everyone who shits on you is your enemy. (2) Not everyone who gets you out of shit is your friend, (3) And when you're in deep shit, it's best to keep your mouth shut! This ends the three minute management course. |
| Jokes Etc › Giving Birth by Labans(op): 2:02pm On Jan 23, 2007 |
A young lady in the maternity ward, just prior to labor, is asked by the midwife if she would like her husband to be present at the birth. "I'm afraid I don't have a husband," she replies. "O.K. do you have a boyfriend?", asks the Midwife. "No, no boyfriend either." "Do you have a partner then?" "No, I'm unattached, I'll be having the baby on my own." After the birth the midwife again speaks to the young woman. "You have a healthy bouncing baby girl, but I must warn you before you see her that the baby is black." "Well," replies the girl. "I was very down on my luck, with no money and nowhere to live, and so I accepted a job in an adult movie. The lead man was black." "Oh, I'm very sorry," says the midwife, "that's really none of my business and I'm sorry that I have to ask you these awkward questions but I must also tell you that the baby has blonde hair." "Well yes," the girl again replies, "you see I desperately needed the money and there was this Swedish guy also involved in the movie, what else could I do?" "Oh, I'm sorry," the midwife repeats, "that's really none of my business and I hate to pry further but your baby has slanted eyes." "Well yes," continues the girl, "I was incredibly hard up and there was a little Chinese man also in the movie, I really had no choice." At this the midwife again apologizes collects the baby and presents her to the girl, who immediately proceeds to give baby a slap on the rear. The baby starts crying and the mother exclaims, "Well thank God for that!" "What do you mean?!" says the midwife, shocked. "Well," says the girl extremely relieved, "I had this horrible feeling that she was going to bark." |
| Jokes Etc › Talking Dog by Labans(op): 1:34pm On Jan 23, 2007 |
A guy is driving around Tennessee and he sees a sign in front of a house: "Talking Dog For Sale." He rings the bell and the owner tells him the dog is in the backyard. The guy goes into the backyard and sees a Labrador retriever sitting there. "You talk?" he asks. "Yep," the Lab replies. "So, what's your story?" The Lab looks up and says, "Well, I discovered that I could talk when I was pretty young. I wanted to help the government, so I told the CIA about my gift, and in no time at all they had me jetting from country to country, sitting in rooms with spies and world leaders, because no one figured a dog would be eavesdropping. I was one of their most valuable spies for eight years running." "But the jetting around really tired me out, and I knew I wasn't getting any younger so I decided to settle down. I signed up for a job at the airport to do some undercover security wandering near suspicious characters & listening in. I uncovered some incredible dealings and was awarded a batch of medals. I got married, had a mess of puppies, and now I'm just retired." The guy is amazed. He goes back in and asks the owner what he wants for the dog. "Ten dollars," the guy says. "Ten dollars? This dog is amazing. Why on earth are you selling him so cheap?" "Because he's a liar. He never did any of that stuff. |
