₦airaland Forum

Person go see you with rubber and small towel and en go still ask you "you wan go fetch water?". . . No! I dey go pipeline vandalization.

Akpors. . .
Mummy, when me and
Daddy were in the Bus
coming Back, he asked
me 2give my seat
position 2 a lady
standing in the Bus & I
had 2stand for 2hours.
Mummy. . . Son, what
your Dad asked U 2do
waz a good thing,
always respect your
elders and give them
your seats in public
buses. .
Akpors. . . . Ok ,But
Mommy I waz sitting on
Dads laps naa when he
asked me 2stand up 4d
Lady. . .
Akpors Parents are still
Fighting right now. . .

fat akpors saw an
advertisement, "Lose
5kg
in a Week." He called and
said,
"I would like to join!"
Lady:
Ok! Be ready tomorrow
at
6 am. Next morning,he
gets to the office & he
was
taken to a room. He
opens the door and finds
a
hot babe in only a shirt
and underpants. She
said,
"If u catch me u canf*ck
me!" & the girl starts
running. Akpors starts
running but couldn't
catch
her. So during the whole
week,he tried to catch
her
but couldn't & lost 5kg.
He then asks for the
10kg
program. Next morning
at
6am,he opens the door
and finds a more hotter
babe in a bikini who said,
"If you catch me,you
f*ck
me." He lost 10kg that
week. So,he thought
this
program is awesome!
He
requested a 25kg
program. Thelady said,
"Are U sure?It's really
tough!! He replied, ''am
more than ready'' The
next day at 6am,he
opens
the door expecting to
see
a naked babe but finds
a
Naked MAD MAN who
said, "If I Catch U eh! Your back side will never remain the same"
.
Akpors is still running his fat ass out.

Akpors: Do you have a
boyfriend?
Girl: Nope. I don't want
to have a boyfriend.
Akpors: Gen. 2:18 The
Lord God said, “It is not
good
for the man to be alone.
I will make a helper
suitable for him.�
Girl: But I don't love you.
Akpors: 1 John 4:8
"Whoever does not love
does
not know God, because
God is love."
Girl: But how can I be
sure that you're loyal
and
honest?
Akpors: Mark 13:31
"Heaven and earth will
pass
away, but my words
will never pass away."
Girl: But I'm busy, I'm
still studying.
Akpors: Ecclesiastes 3:1
"There is a time for
everything, and a
season for every
activity
under the heavens."
Girl: But why me? There
are a lot of girls out
there.
Akpors: Proverbs 31:29
"Many women do noble
things, but you surpass
them all."
Girl: But what is in me
that you like?
Akpors: Song of
Solomon 4:7 "You are
altogether
beautiful, my darling;
there is no flaw in you."
Girl: But I'm not
beautiful.
Akpors: Proverbs 31:30
"Charm is deceptive, and
beauty is fleeting; but a
woman who fears the
Lord is to be praised."
Girl: What do you want
to happen?
Akpors: 2 Corinthians 2:4
"For I wrote you out of
great distress and
anguish of heart and
with
many tears, not to
grieve you but to let you
know the depth of my
love for you."
One word for St.
Akpostus!

chidi227: adele- set fire tn the rain
pink- just give me a reason

even my 6yrs old lil sister likes these songs like die, especially pink ft nate rues.

decepticos: luda's runaway

i love this song, the one he did with mary.j.blige. . . The video is da bomb

seunlayi: I really love this nokia phone - 3d satellites map, Whatsapp, camera flash, 3g, modem function, and most importantly,the battery life.

blackberry is just overhyped, that phone is thrash, the next version only passes the previous one with one little thing.

A man gave a FAKE N20
to
akpors a blind man by
the
road side
who was begging for
alms.
akpors the blind man
said,
excuse
me sir, but i have to tell
u
that ur money is fake
and i
dont like it.
The man was suprised
and
said, how did u
knw its fake.
Akpors
replied, Well am not
blind,
am standing in for my
blind
friend who always
stands
here.
The man asked, and
where is ur friend
Akpors said, he has
gone to
the cinema to watch a
movie.

An American man,
English man
and Nigerian man,
Akpos were
travelling
by sea. Suddenly, the
devil
appeared on the ship
and said; Drop anything
on
the sea
water, if I find it, i’ll eat
you, if i don’t find it, i’ll
be your
slave.
The American dropped a
Pin, devil found it and
ate him.
The English man
dropped a Coin, devil
found it
and ate him. It
was finally the turn of
the
Nigerian. The Nigerian,
Akpos brought out his
Bottle of
water, opened it and
poured a drop of water
into the sea
and said to the
devil; Today na Today.
Oya,
Find the drop.
The devil himself
fainted! One word for
Akpos?

sleakid: What bout the one you got walooped by LEE?

Update it please

lmao

AKPOS THE MARRIED
MAN
Akpos was
having an affair with his
secretary.
One day, their passions
overcame them and
they took off for her
house, where they
made passionate love all
afternoon. Exhausted
from the fun, they fell
asleep...awakening
around 8pm. As AKPOS
threw on his
clothes, he told his
secretary to take his
shoes outside and rub
them through the grass
and dirt. Mystified, she
nonetheless complied.
He slipped into his shoes
and drove home.
"Where have you been?"
demanded his wife
when he entered the
house.
"Darling, I can't lie to
you. I've been having an
affair with my
secretary and we've
been having fun all
afternoon. I fell asleep
and didn't wake up until
eight o'clock."
The wife glanced down
at his shoes and said,
"You lying bastard!
You've been playing
golf".

Akpors did stomach
surgery and when he
opened his eyes, he said
oh thank God ooh, its
over.
One patient beside him
said, hmm taaa don't be
too fast there, I don't
think so because when I
had my surgery 2 days
ago, they forgot razor in
my Tommy.
Another Patient said in
di room: the same as
me ooh, but my own na
little spoon they forgot
in my chest.
...
Immediately doctor
came back and said: Did
anybody see my watch?

Akpors went for HIV
test in a
hospital on friday and
was told to
come back on monday
for the
result.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
When he got to church
on sunday,
the pastor declared to
the people
that
"everything you are
looking for
this week shall be
positive"
Akpors jumped on his
feet and
shouted "i reject it in
jesus name,
my own go be negative
ooooooo"

mondi_cheeks: I'm actually foreign

did you scrutinise this site very well? Its called naira"land not dollar or euro land.

mondi_cheeks: It only seems like a favour if u cannot satisfy her

and must you lie there like a corpse? You no dey watch foreign movies where gals take the bull by the horn. For pete's sake, guys aint mr.know-all, if you know what turns u on, then let him know.

lalaosky: OP, you're right and that's why they will end up saying he used and dumped me as if the sexx wasn't mutual or the guys enjoys it more. Smh

exactly!!, "he used me and dumped me" is their normal sentence. Like say she no enjoy am when she dey moan like mumu.

Akpos was fond of
putting his wife's
photo in his wallet so
one day d wife
asked Him
WIFE:Y is my foto
always in ur wallet
AKPOS: wen am in
trouble...i just look
at it and d problem
disappears
WIFE:hmm...do u c how
miraculous i
am in ur life?
AKPOS:...I just look ur
picture and say
to my self
"wat problem could be
bigger dan
this"?..