₦airaland Forum

^^^ if this babe face mikuz him in cry oh

Gbagbo, burn d joke for dvd name am "dustBIN GBAGBO season 0.5", dont let me start with you oh!

*searching my arsenal, looking for a high calibre 9mm to shoot this donkey off NL*

Onyeasi na full fledged 'affiin' or him be the 'escapee' version? i dey ask studio because e be like say him and onyeasi don 'run things' before

^^^what have i told you concerning that benylin & codine that you always drink? My brother it is making you s l o w , go to that ìýá Bashiru's shop outside ya workshop and collect 2 shotz of dogoyaro on credit. dont drink it oh, just pour it into your eyes (one eye per shot) then try your very best to read this thread again okay. Thank me later and dont forget to pay ìýá Bashiru once end of month reach.







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if 'what you do not know' cant hurt you, then Onyeasi must be INVULNERABLE! , the dude seems to know nofin at all

Onyeoshi, i know that its alright to be stewpid, but you are trying to make a 'career' out of it

the awkward moment when at 11pm you locate and slot your atm card into an atm machine and suddenly the power goes off.
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when your aged china fone decides to 'auto power' on and off when you are in the middle of a crowded and quiet seminar.
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when you invite all your friends and neighbours to come and watch the champions league finals in your crib and them after passing out drinks and the first half is underway your DSTV subscription suddenly expires.
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that awkward moment when you are looking at your iPhone 4 falling down from the 20th storey after it slipped out of your fingers while you were relaxing on the outside balcony of your hotel room.
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the very awkward moment when you are speeding on a highway doing 80kmph and them spotting a hold up ahead, your vehicles brakes then decides to fail you at that instant.

lol, make una see the useless answer oh,
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Ebu, i rily soprice fur yuor leta. I see yuo wen yuo saw me but i shy and i luk down. The way my hat is doin me i want to folo yuo but i canot leaf my peper bisness because it is where i shop. I like to fone yuo but yuo wil reshage me fest. Dis yuor leta has rily tosh me. If yuo come to my oga madam compound in this nite i wil meet yuo for awa bakyard.
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Yuor hat,
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Bintu baebae

* a quick detour * lol, see this funny love letter that a mechanic wrote to a chick,
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helo giel, i want to wryte to you dis leta because evrydae i saw yuo opposit my shop, yuo see me and me too i saw yuo and i hav wash yuo for a sevrally long tyme now. The way yuor behavior is noor gud for me. I want to take yuo az a gud giel fwend because yuo ar a beatyfool giel in this awa town, so i lobe yuo like flawa. Ermm, but one tin is dat i wont to talk to yuo but yuo dont half time that is why i shuldnt come and tulk to yuo. if yuo tink that yuo canot read the leta just fone me and gave me the reply or the ansa. I hav done. I lobe yuo. Buy buy.
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Yurs foreva,
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Ebubedike, mekanik

what an amazing lawyer he was, once he got the jury so confused that they 'SENT THE JUDGE TO JAIL'

BOSS: i have decided to use humour in the office, experts say humour helps to release tension which is very important in times when the work force is being reduced.
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BOSS: "KNOCK KNOCK"
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EMPLOYEE: "WHO IS THERE"
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BOSS: "NOT YOU ANYMORE"

@studio: i noticed that you have a 'striking' personality, but what i really need to know is exactly how long it has been on 'Strike'?

Two politicians were having a heated debate, finally one of them jumped up and screamed at the other "WHAT ABOUT THE POWERFUL INTEREST THAT CONTROLLS YOU", and the other politician yelled "HEY, YOU LEAVE MY WIFE OUT OF THIS"

Lilkech: bin gbagbo told of that you can speak in 'cat language', is this true?
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Ajibole: "me-how"

A car was involved in an accident on a busy lagos road, as expected a large crowd gathered and 'mikuz' anxious to know exactly what happened at the scene tried his very best to get through the crowd but could not so he began screaming "make way oh, let me pass abeg, i am the first son of the victim" and the crowd immediately made way for him. Lying on the ground in front of the car was a 'HE GOAT'

@ajibole: i like u, u know why? because u make me believe in 'reincarnation' , someone cannot become as stew-pid as u r in just one lifetime

@ajibole: r u alwayz this stew-pid? or r u just making a special effort today?

One day a drunkard was brought before a court,

JUDGE: mister, you have been brought here for drinking
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DRUNKARD: great! When do we get started?

Mikuz: how do u keep an eediot in suspense?
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Lilkech: il tell u later

@preetyebony: my sista no worry yaself dey look 4 any joke on this thread. Na just some instances of very embarrasing and awkward situations wey i fit think of or rememba, U get? Like that aftanoon wey as u and ur bobo dey 4 l k ur PERIOD come COMMOT , abi e nor do u somehow when all that smelling blood full 4 ontop ur bobo pr*ic*k and the bedsheet? Or dat time when u been dey suck him p*r*i*c*k and him come PISS enta ya mouth? Ehh, how e do u dat time?
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Please i did not mean any insult or harm, i was just getting you and those other s l o w brains to understand my plight concerning this thread. I know you have other special awkward moments to share with us. So, lets bring it on okay.

Mikuz ur brain calculates very s l o w l y , lay off the benylin for a day or two okay. i swear it will do you much good

^^^ run outside, buy a litre of fuel, use it to clean that your screen and then ASK IT AGAIN

when you are taken to a cell and the sergent commands you to pull off your shirt and trousers knowing fully well that you have no underwear on.
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when you finish having s e x with an ashi and she immediately jumps up and swallows a huge amount of assorted hiv and syphilis tablets.
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when you fart in your office and then your boss storms in.
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when a beautiful girl asks for your bb pin when you do not own a bb.
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when you are toasting a girl in a restaurant and then another girl that you have also been toasting the day before walks up to your table to greet you.
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a girl finally decides to go home with you from the club and on getting to your car you find out that you have lost its keys.
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when you are toasting a lady in a bar and then her boy friend comes in and sits at your table.
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when you wake up late and rush your drive to work, enter your office and sit down only to discover that the coat, pair of trousers, socks and shoes that you put on do not match themselves.
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They are at it again oh. They are abusing of on my own thread oh. I once brought up a suggestion for this line of behaviour and dani assured me he will look into it but up till now NADA has been said or done. Instead he locked the thread.

when you are trying to mess and instead SHIT falls out of your a r z e.
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when the examiner catches you with a text book under your table during an exam.
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when you are toasting a babe on your bb and your subscription suddenly expires.
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when you tie your towel and go outside to fetch water and the towel drops.
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When you are trying to cat walk for a group of guys and you miss a step, trip and fall.
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when you kiss your toddlers lips only to find out that he was still eating a cockroach.
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when you stroll into Mr. Biggs with your new babe and tell her to order all she wants only to find out that you can only pay for half of it.
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when you break an egg into your already steaming indomie only to find out that the egg was rotten.

you are all requested to add your own experiences okay.
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WHAT HAPPENS IN THAT AWKWARD MOMENT WHEN :
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bruno mars FAILS to catch the GRENADE
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when you walk in and your mom and dad are HAVING SEX
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when someone asks you whats the problem and THEY ARE THE PROBLEM.
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when you raise your hands in class and ask a STUPID QUESTION.
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when you mistakenly send a LOVE text message to your MOMS telephone number. and that moment when she opens it up to read
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when someone strolls in while you are getting dressed.
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when your mom is washing the dishes and you SLOWLY put yours in the sink.
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when you want to pay for something but cant find your wallet.
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when everyone is comparing their grades and you are the only one who FAILED.
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when 'CAPS LOCK' is not enough to express your anger.
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when someone skinnier than you calls themselves FAT.
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when you accidentally FART in the gym while doing sit ups.
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when the guy serving you STICKS his finger in his NOSE.

hehehe,

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what did the German clock maker say to the clock that went "tick - tick - tick", ?

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"ve haff vayz ov making you TOCK"
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*anoda silly joke*

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Two cows were grazing together on a field and one cow turned to the other and said 'MOO' , then the second cow turned back and said 'FUNNY , I WAS JUST ABOUT TO SAY THAT'

mehn , see haterz oh, all of una nor well.

One day a man was watching a Nigerian match and his wife came to nag him, honey could you fix the kitchen bulb? It keeps flickering, and the man answered, now? No way, or do you see "NEPA" written on my forehead?, Then the wife said "then could you fix the refrigerator? The door hinge keeps falling off", the man glared at his wife and said "for what? Or did you see THERMOCOOL written on my head?" and he once more faced the tv, His wife came once more and said to him "ok o, then kindly fix the cable in our room, you know i have missed my sitcoms this part month" and the man answered "see this woman oh, me fix cable? I cant, abi did my mother write DSTV on my head?" them the man got up and left the house in anger to in to the car and continue his soccer over some bottles of beer. During extra time he felt remorse for his actions and decided to in good to calm his wife, as he got home he noticed that the kitchen light was fixed, when he opened the fridge to get adds he noticed that the door was fixed, when he went to the room to meet his wife he saw her watching cable and he asked "honey, how did all these stuff get fixed?" and his wife said "after you went out i went outside and cried then a guy say me, he said he will fix it all if i have sex with him or bake him a cake" , them the man asked "wow! What kind of cake did you bake for him?" and his wife answered "are you alright? See of see wahala oh! Come did you see TANTALIZERS written on my forehead?"

@dyt: i see, so u r scratching ur BALD head? That is a sure sign of 'Lakpa-LAKPA', I RECOMMEND CIGAR ASH MIXED WITH FUEL. Dry on your stove for best results.
@ajibole: yes u r now trying in ur math, i presume u have dropped d shekpe abi? Good 4 u man.