Lukui's Posts
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Pure. Dope. Clinical. Typical. Magical. Classical. Authentic. Artistic. Bombastic!!!! Even if an artist does no more art, his relics still lives on !!! All hail the best!!! CR7!!!!! |
How much will I pay for you to teach me Yahoo? |
Crazy Environment( cultural, social, political, psychological, marital, financial, economical etc) Crazy world!!!! Listen to "Crazy " by Shatta Wale Just joking ![]() |
Most of them usually break even But something is better than nothing sha!!! |
What the hell? |
6p Prior Planning Prevents Piss Poor Performance Credit: Officer Bellick in Prison Break |
Women like tonto dike are a disgrace to womanhood |
Drugs, wine, women, three things common with most crimes |
La illaha illa Allahu!! |
Didn't he have immunity? |
Hope the investigation won't be swept under the carpet at the end of the day And if the people at home didn't tell, the visitor cannot know that the chicken inside the soup has black feathers. On this issue, we need to look inwards. |
Idle hand, devil's tool |
Say no to crime, but what doesn't kill you makes you stronger. |
These guys will be like, PMB open the border now!! |
To marry a woman is not the problem, the issue is chop money. 5G is not the problem, the problem is is there 5g network beside my house? |
Be deceiving yourself, after embarrassing Ekweremadu in Germany ehn? |
Hope Buhari still won't be blamed for this one |
Be deceiving yourself, will a woman follow you home if you don't have money? |
Mrs Ambode |
Oh boy, Baba God me self wan buy Lambo oh!! |
nice one hala Madrid |
and his poultry farm that was factory fitted tothe back fence of the house to another place. He now resides along Seaport Road. The only person remaining in the house with Mrs C is Nuru Marli CONSPIRACY THEORIES Without telling anyone as usual, Nuru Marlo plotted and planned how he will liberate himself. Filled with hate, some years ago, he had packed all his luggage and left for a rented room along Antelope Road. Both MrA and MrsC were all aware of this. Though he Nuru Marlo didn't inform them, he usually shuttle between both house spending one-night here and one night there. Eight months later, he had some financial issues with the landlord's son. Mr Raymond got infuriated and threatened to lock him up at the nearest police station. There was a police officer living together with them in the building. His name was Matthew. He had invited Nuru Marli earlier into his house to get familiar with him. "Police is your friend. And it is good to know your neighbour" he said. On that day of humiliation, Nuru Marli could remember vividly, it was Wednesday evening. He just left home at 69, Mushroom Avenue, went to Assembly prayed, Maghrib and had planned to go to Antelope Road. Less did he know that it was going to be a very disgraceful day for him. Thinking he was smart, Nuru Marli entered the three storeyed building without greeting anyone. He was now fed up with the behaviour of his neighbours around there. He decided to take a leave. He won't inform anyone of them that he is leaving. Sensitive to what was going on, the neighbours too have noticed what was going on. On of his flat neighbours Mrs Deborah had informed others that they suspect that Nuru Marli is secretly packing his loads and wanting to leave. As fate would have it, Mr Raymond got informed. Mathew, the policeman was not in the building. Like wild flames , Raymond blew up. "You haven't paid NEPA bill. You haven't paid security bill" he roared. "Gba gba" heavy knocks landed on Nuru Marli's door thinking that he was inside. ************************************************** The gallons, buckets and file cabinets that he carried on his head ,shoulder and back were starting to wear him down. There was still time for him to pack all his loads tonight. He thought. Silently, he shifted the padlock at the gate of 69,Mushroom Avenue and entered. Mrs C and Nick Minaj were inside but they haven't slept yet. They could hear footsteps . And knowing fully well that no nocturnal animal is in their house except Nuru Marli. "He is a bat" Nicki Minaj said. "Yes , he sleeps during the day and works at night" her mother completed the sentence and they both laughed. Two neighbours had earlier fought about NEPA bill. One was allotted to be paying five hundred naira monthly while the other was allotted one thousand naira. This was what causes the brouhaha. ![]() "How will you be paying five hundred naira and in will be paying one thousand naira? This is rubbish. You are stupid. You are mad!" "I am mad? I will show you madness today!" Mrs C and Nicki Minaj had went out after closing their shop to settle the matter. "Sallam Alaykum" they greeted "Ah Alhaja, its you!" they exclaimed when they saw her. "What is the problem?" "It is NEPA bill oh!" "May be we should inform the landlord!" she suggested. ''Yes that is a very good idea" "Call the landlord" "Call the landlord" everybody roared in unison. That was how the fight died down. Nuru Marli had placed all his belongings inside his room. His room was the only room in the house that had had a door fitted outside so he doesn't need to enter the whole building to get to his room. Discreetly, he departed for Antelope Road again. Little did he know that he was going to face the consequence of his French leave. Tiptoeing, he entered the three storeyed building, all that was left for him to carry was his bucket , sponges, soap and toothbrush. He had almost got out of the passage when Mr Raymond summoned him. He went out, dropped the bucket and went in . Mr Raymond locked up his shirt and started shouting "Thief!, Thief!!, Thief!!!" Immediately, everybody....... to be continued........ |
Months later Mrs C was now getting happy and livelier. She didn't even feel like someone whose son has just died. Such is life, whatever you sow, you shall always reap. Her main enemy, Nuru Marli is still well and alive, walking, eating and breathing free air. Mr A has travelled to Abuja and he won't be back for months. Rumours has it that whenever Mr A is not around, Mrs C usually visit her sugar daddies to satisfy her. This is because Mr A can no longer perform to her satisfaction. Women! can you really satisfy them? The house they are all living, which is at 69, Mushroom Avenue, Jakarta Park, Istanbul was the main reason why Mrs C wants Nuru Marli dead. The house is very precious to her. They all hailed from Berlin but she has gotten accustomed to the life in Istanbul that she doesn't want to leave. Therefore she solicited the house from Mr A as one of her properties to be inherited when Mr A died. Without hesitating, he accepted. Debanji has moved all his loads from the boys quarters. He transits between instanbul and Berlin like someone going to the toilet. Though he works in Istanbul, his family, wife and kids reside in Berlin. Babatunde also lives in Istanbul but he now resides at a poultry farm on the outskirts of the town. Chris, Mrs C's first son who lives with her before have packed all his loads and his.... to be continued..... |
"Ah welcome ma" Nuru Marli said as he saw Mrs B his mum alighting from a motorcycle. "Banky W how are you? " she said greeting Nuru Marli's friend. "Ah fine ma" he replied. "Carry this one inside the kitchen" "Ma have Nuru Marli told you that he is going to Tokyo? " he asked her. "Tokyo? No. For what? " she asked amusingly. "Eh Banky please wait" "Nuru Marli, Nuru Marli!" she screamed "Nuru Marli, mum is calling you" "OK am coming" Nuru Marli said. "Your dad called me today and said that Wiz Khalifa is dead oh!! So you better get prepared we are going to Istanbul tomorrow! " "What happened? " Bank asked ignorantly. "Be going home" Nuru Marli advised him. "I will call you or we will see later! " he continued. "OK no P" he replied. At Instanbul Everywhere and everyone was mourning especially 69 Mushroom Avenue, the street where Mr A has spent almost all his life. It is just because he is not a citizen of Instanbul had it been he were, he would have been duly elected for a post. Why? He is a very influential man, well revered and respected. Most quarrelling neighbours usually come to settle their disputes at his house. The district's Imam was also around. He called the first born and muttered in low voices what will be done and how they will carry out the burial and funeral processions. "OK sir" the first son nodded like an Agama Agama. Notable personalities like Daddy Showkey, Baba Frayo, Shatta Wale, Sarkodie, Majek Fashek, Beautiful Nubia, ,Lagbaja etc were also present. Everyone was just in a sober mood. Rental service chairs had been placed on the floor. They were all white and people were removing each one to sit. Few minutes later, Nuru Marli, Mrs B and her entourage arrived. It was a soul touching and sober reflecting mood. They entered, greeted, greeted, greeted and continued greeting. "Good afternoon ma. May God grant you the fortitude to bear the loss" "We won't see things like this again Insha Allahu" she prayed whilst on her knees. Nuru Marking viewed the sitting room as he entered the wide parlour. All the seaters had their head inverted and were all sober. "Let's recite Suratul Iklas thrice" the imam started the Islamic funeral prayer. Nuru Marli was the onus of the occasion. All eyes were on him. Smart, sharp and criminally minded people around knew the whole story about Wiz Khalifa's death, Mrs C's jealousy , Nuru Marli 's French leave and so on. They couldn't do anything but just to pity Nuru Marli, the poor boy. He carried two of this gallons to the well and was filling them with water. Mourners were murmuring but he could hear what they were saying amongst themselves. "See him, he doesn't care. He was just fetching his own water" one said. "Ehn what do you want him to do? Life goes on! " the second person replied. After fetching water, cooking small food and eating, Nuru Marlo came out of his room, wearing one black long sleeve shirt. He sat quietly beside his mum. They were both mute like a dead log of wood. Silently, she asked him when will he resume back to work. He told him that may be Monday or Tuesday but because of the funeral going on, he will have to be excused at work. The prayers and burial will take place for three days. The principal of his school doesn't trust him both in his presence or in his absence. He has his own cliche in the sraffroom. They are a cabal. After the principal himself, he, Nuru Marli is the most feared person in the school, not because he beatsbor punishes the students but because he doesn't tell anyone or divulge his plans to anyone before he carries them out. If he plans to undertake a task, he can strategise for it for three months before it will bear fruition. Mrs C has wailed and cried, when she glanced back and saw Nuru Marli, she was shocked that he was still fresh, rotund and alive. Sympathisers and most of her friends were sitting with her and consoling her to take heart. Mr A also was sitting together with them in the room. He wore a white Agbada and a white cap. He was now calm and relaxed. He didn't even take much as to come over all that have happened. Days later Mrs B returned back to Berlin. ****************************** Debanji, Nuru Marli's brother just came back from Berlin. He rode on his usual motorcycle, Boxers. Smartly, Nuru Marking cane out of his room to greet him and sympathised about the dead. "Ah may the God Almighty, forgive him oh! " Nuru Marli prayed "Amin" he replied. They talked and jisted. Debanji had visited Berlin and had been told to bring Nuru Marli's currixuy vitae. May be there is an opening or a job vacancy. Without hesitating, Nuru Marli complied and submitted the CV to him. Nuru Marli knew that all these things were just formalities. They will have picked the people that they already needed. Imagine the other time that he applied for Customs Service, they were told to scan and upload medical fitness form. Before he went to the hospital, thirty thousand people had applied, it took him weeks before he could complete the task. When he came back and asked the cafe client, he told him that four hundred and fifty thousand people had applied. He was like "What the hell? " |
Won't the people suspect him? They might say that he killed him for money ritual. Ah he is in deep shit. What can he do now? He was list in thought. After some minutes, Wizkid entered his room. "Go and check Wiz Khalifa and come and tell me how he is feeling" he commanded. "OK sir, "he jumped up with a stick of candy in his hand. "Where is your mum? " he barked before the boy left the room. "She went to NASFAT" he replied "Ok" "He is in his room" he came back and reported to him. "Poor boy. I wonder if he ever goes out of that room except for food or toilet " he muttered "Chai. What will I do now? " "Well sitted oh" Mrs C greeted as she came in. She was beaming with joy. She noticed that Mr A's face looked worried. "What is the problem? " she asked him She wore white white. "Eh nothing, nothing" he replied pretending as if everything is fine " "You did not even reply my greetings as I was greeting you" "I am fine. How was your prayer? Did you prayed for me? He asked hypocritically forcinga hard laugh through his mouth. "Let me freshen up" she said as she entered the toilet. TWO WEEKS LATER "Ah welcome ma" Nuru Marking said as he saw Mrs B, his mum he came back and reported to him. to be continued..... |
wanted to collect one (pos) so I went to uba to ask for one, because I too wanted to start the lucrative business, less did I know the cumbersomeness of the work, come and see what the bank customer care listed for me to do 1.register with cac(corporate affairs commission) 2.must get a shop 3. must have target and customers I was perplexed, no wonder most Nigerian startup businesses are dead on arrival!!! but they said that bank pos are better than interswitch owns sha!!!! |
oya blame BUHARI |
oya start blaming BUHARI |
like pdp |
the guy that successfully incorporated Rugby with football, if you miss ball don't miss leg though Tottenham go carry cup but I pity their players den go smell pepper!!!!!! |
congrats man!!! |
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