₦airaland Forum

Coco29,

I know that black men think that you can have it all courtesy of the Hip Hop culture.The massage from the Hip Hop world is you can have as many Bitchesand Hoes as you like with no regard to the consequences.I think that one of the problems is that marriage has become over the counter issue where you could meet a woman on Friday night and get married Monday morning in your local registry.

Have you considered that your marriage  failed because you got married early?

Coco29,

Coco29:
mrmayor
i am a black woman, very independent and i must say that i was a very good wife 12yrs and i did not once cheat on my husband or disobeyed him, i put up with a lot of sh*t to, now i do not go out with white men i am not white so i do not identify with them i only know about black men

I love black women too,I have never being attracted to a white woman they don't do it for me,I will always speak from my direct experience and what I observe around me.The divorce rate among Africans living in the Diaspora is high,I know friends Nigerians who are divorced in the UK & Ireland for reasons ranging from infidelity to domestic violence and I can't seem to point to a common link why this is happening.

I have always being intrigue why the divorce rate of black marriages seem to higher than that of the white or Asian marriages.The Asian marriages seem stronger because they have a strong family support whereas in Black marriages it looks like everyone is taking a bet as at when the relationship would hit the rocks.

For some strange reason Sisters prefer the woman beaters,during courtship the man hits you over and over again you make excuses for him and later you complain about the violent husband,I just don't get it.

You were right to slap the fool who was talking down on you in front of your children but wouldn't that constitute domestic violence?You could get done for GBH or ABH

Hi COCO29,

Sister I feel your pain,I lived in London a few years ago and I understand where you are coming from.I think your anger though genuine is misdirected to black men alone,the black community (family) is in total anarchy,without direction at this point in time.
I watch a program on Channel4 last night,it was about the activist Douglas Howe and his relationship with his son,it showed cased the problem single parenthood as it affects the blackman.

I said that your anger was misdirected at the blackman because blackwomen encourage these broke a$$ black men to stay home,scratching their balls and blaming the whole world for all that is wrong in their lives.In my experience black women in the London area prefer black men who go around being all macho,no jobs,all hoping to make it in music to the 9-5 black men anyday.

In many discussions with Drusilla,I have argued that black men need to start taking responsibilities for the babies they make,there is no need telling the woman to keep the baby if you are not going to step up and take charge.

I don't believe in domestic violence in any form,I also know that some black women are violent in their relationships,they hit you and expect you to remain calm and if you return the favour they call the Met.Some women I hear actually love violent men,so what gives.

I Love black women,I hope they start making better choices in men and don't carried away by bling.The black community needs to get up their a$$ and stop blaming the white man for all problems

Good one Lauryn,I can't stop laughing.

Girlfriend,

Welcome to Nairaland,its fun,its rough and it rocks.Express yourself the best way you can,say what you want the crazier the better,fear no one and please don't take opinions here personally.

добро пожаловать и имейте потеху

If anyone takes a close look on how the Nigerian Army is structured you would realize that the possibility of a successful coup is rather high.An ambitious general  with at least 3 General Officer Commanding (GOCs) of any of the five divisions of the Nigerian Army would be successful.

I don't believe that there would a popular protest against a military regime replacing PDP governments,the masses are tired of PDP led stealing,I would not protest the demise of OBJ thats for sure.Nigerians are cowards anyway, who wants to die!

Are the people wiser?Yes they are wiser,we know that the present rate of looting of public funds cannot continue,the present political structure is untenable,the Islamisation of Nigeria has got to stop,something has got give.

this is the problem

The problem with Nigeria is the Praise Singers,journalist fall over themselves to give these guys fraudulent awards for all kinds of reasons.
People like Bisi Olatilo,Dele Momodu with his all singing,all praising magazine Ovation and all kinds of sycophants praise these governors to the rafters.

The Nigerian press has not held the Ruling Class to account for their misrule,all you hear is Mr Governor has installed 10 million boreholes,repaired all hospitals,all schools are international standards without any evidence for these marvelous deeds,people are still dying in hospitals,children are still roaming the streets and civil servants still go unpaid for months on end its just ridiculous!

The situation in Ebonyi state applies to all nooks and crannies of that pathetic country

The Simpsons no doubt,you can't beat Bart Simpson's wicked sense of humour or professional Shit Brain Homer,what can I say about springfields champion do-gooder Lisa Simpson,Rev.Lovejoy,Apu,Principal Skinner and don't forget Madge Simpson.

The Simpsons are just the best,they have a cult following around the world.

Beer The Cause And Solution To All My Problems

I thought I was the only one experiencing NairaLand Wahala,its being slowing down for last couple of weeks.Now I know its not my laptop.The earlier Seun gets this stuff sorted the better.

Edygirl,

My original response to question is that there is no Hard and Fast Rule about what to do if I find myself in such situation,my actions would have to be determined by the circumstances surrounding the woman.If she is the type that blows her money on a lot of rubbish then I wouldn't give her a dime.
We all go through financial difficulties,I have been through my own share of money worries but I pulled through and learnt better money management,some women buy stuff they don't need.

The last girl I was out with was a spender,who spent on perfumes,shoes etc while neglecting her bills!,I will not give her money just because we sleep together
I still repeat the situation is not one size fits all.You gave money to your boyfriend because you understood the problems he was going through,he didn't find himself in that situation because he was partying with his school fees.

Toym28,

You want to chat?i'm bored as hell.

ToyM28:
MrMayor, i wldnt get hitched 2 a guy that is irresponsible from d word go. But if he turns out like that, i would help him at least we are still frnds, but i'll tell him 2 get himself sorted or else m out!

YOU ARE MY TYPE OF GIRL

Toym28,

I'm just curious,would you help out your man with money if he spends all he's got on bling and shit stuff or would you tell to take a hike and get himself sorted.

Zarah,

I'm not one of those who think that if a woman moves on its because she has met a richer man,in my experience I had a girl who was just extravagant to the core,who would buy the latest Gucci shoe and at the end of the month she wants the man to pay for her rent.I don't see any reason why a woman who makes less than I do should spend a lot more than I do in a month.

Do I know when am suppose to do stuff for my woman absolutely yes,but she has to prove to me that she can stand on her own two feet.The women in my family are hardworking women who can do stuff for themselves without waiting for a man and that what I expect from my woman.

I don't expect a woman to pay the bills when we go out or shopping,infact I would find it insulting if she decides to pay for the stuff we buy together.I love my girl when she looks good and smells good but that shouldn't in the detriment of real stuff like your rent/mortgage,school fees,paying for health insurance etc things that we can't do without.

Would I help out my woman that includes my wife financially if the need arises yes but not when she has spent the money she's got on frivolous stuff.

Cheers

Yinkagal,

I'll get back to you on the Reformed Ogboni Frat,I'll speak to a friend whose dad is a long time member.

Cheers

YinkaGal,

I don't know much about Ogboni fraternity,I do know that Nigerians are scared of them.They are reputed supposed to be ritualistic,witches,blood suckers.I have heard that they (frat member) exchange their heads with those of friends and family to extend their life span.
Apparently every once in a while the cult would demand you sacrifice a loved one in return you would more successful and more powerful in society.

I have heard that countless people have repented and recounted all their evil acts when they became born again,what I do know is that frat members do not pretend or hide the fact they belong to Ogboni Fraternity,so much for it being a secret society.People known to be frat member are usually feared and I've heard that armed robbers never visit them.I don't know how true these stories go.


You can get more info on the net,

Source.     http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ogboni

Ogboni (also known as Osugbo in Ijèbú) is a fraternal institution indigenous to the Yoruba-speaking polities of western Nigeria and eastern Republic of Bénin. The society performs a range of political and religious functions, including exercising a profound influence on regents and serving as high courts of jurisprudence in capital offenses.

Though versions or lodges of this fraternal group are found among the various types of Yoruba polities——from highly-centralized kingdoms and empires like Oyo, to the independent towns and villages of the Ègbá and the Èkiti——the Ogboni are recognizable for their veneration of the personified earth (Ilè or Odua) and their emphasis on gerontocratic authority and benevolent service to the town. While membership in the Ogboni generally signified a high level of power and prestige, the society held pre-eminent political authority among decentralized groups like the Ègbá, where they were intimately involved in the selection of regents.

Ogboni lodges were one of the main commissioners of brass jewelry and sculpture in precolonial Yorubaland, using the metal's rust-resistant qualities as an apt metaphor for the immortal functions and beliefs of Ogboni adepts. The most recognizable of these symbols was a pair of Ogboni initiates, one male and one female, attached by a chain and worn around the neck. The pair are thought to symbolize the attachment of the sexes in procreation and balanced society. Generally, one or both figures will hold a thumb in the grip of the opposite hand, demonstrating the paramount Ogboni handsign denoting initiation and membership.

Various fraternities in Nigeria have incorporated references and insignia from the original Ogboni, including the Reformed Ogboni Fraternity, the Indigenous Ogboni, and various others. Many of these contemporary societies combine elements of Ogboni’s historical functions with superficially similar institutions like Freemasonry and the Rotary Club.

Similar traditional institutions combining political, judicial, and sacred duties exist among the various ethnic nationalities of southern Nigeria, including Okonko in Igbo-speaking southeast Nigeria and Ekpe/Ngbe/Ugbe in the Cross River region of southeastern Nigeria and southwestern Cameroon. Initatory sodalities, or "secret societies", are a common feature of precolonial government across much of West and Central Africa.

when there members die, they take there body parts*

Going to baby mamas is better than wanking myself,I agree with you things we do in relationships should because we want to,not because we have to.
If I meet a women and I get the impression that I have to pay my way to her pants,no problem I'll pay and it ends there,If she is for real I will be there for her no matter what.
The problem with the MTV generation is a lot of women wants the man with the bling,if you have the alloy wheeled car,some dog tags and a bit of cash to spend you are the man.Some women think all they have to do is look fab and the men come crawling and you have to pay for services rendered.

When it comes to "M"word don't get me started,in Ireland before you say hi to a naija woman, make sure you would like to see her popsie and pastor to fix the date of your wedding.as they would say "I don't want to be used"

I'm 5'9,72 kg. work out once a week,I'm not a spender because I have a mortgage to pay.She's a spender who doesn't care where the money comes from
am not doing any dirty stuff to make money to please any woman.
I want my woman to be hardworking and I will stand by her any day,giving women money to buy clothes and perfumes is asking for trouble,if it ain't no more she's walking.

desiree:
Are you that ugly??

No Ma'am,
She just met another who has more dosh,no ill feeling on my side though.My policy now is Pay As You Go.pay for the kitten when you need it,no need for the drama of love,romance and all that bullsh-it.

Am sure I fine pass your Oga

pussy is not love,but some women use their pussy as a TOLL GATE.if want a pass you must pay

Recently I got burnt after helping my woman,I invested the whole works,love,romance,time and financial.I'll be more cautious next time especially the financial section.
If I need pussy bad,there lots of baby mamas in Dublin who give free love,no need to pay through your nose.If I will be garrantied a good pussy session minus the drama.I Will Pay With Joy