Good God. Oh My God

this is the funniest story i have read this week.

OP, how old was your father when he died? Just look at how you are wisely investing your father's hard earned
wealth and investments on a demanding school girl whose father probably doesn't have a wooden stool in his house.

Investing in bank of the TOTO, deposit only, NO WITHDRAWAL.

she is telling you to double up your investments or she will go to the highest bidder and you are here saying that you want to marry her.
you better send her that 50,000 naira now before that karishika starts chasing you in your dreams.

But....... I will [size=18pt]NOT & NEVER[/size] wash your panties

stories upon stories

dont know what to believe anymore

i guess it is all about telling stories and making money

abbeycial:


A good point.
can any one help? was told sometimes back that when you squeeze a fake currency it dosent spread or unfold its self unlike a genuine one which unfolds gradually or spreads out itself even its a bit.

also heard there are some certain watermarks the original currencies have unlike the fake ones.

pple shld kindly share more ideas

THE SMELL OF REAL MONEY IS ALWAYS UNIQUE EVEN IF IT PASSES THROUGH THE HANDS OF 1000 MEN AND WOMEN. [size=4pt]FAKE MONEY CAN NOT PASS THROUGH THE HANDS OF 100 MEN AND WOMEN[/size]

[size=18pt]TRUNK BOX...
WE KNOW[/size]

IyawoDoctor:
She might have an ovarian cyst. Best check with a gynecologist.

do you know anyone with such a condition ?

Jhaytee4all:
say what you can 'cos it's for those who needs 'em. Don't come beggin' for these creams for their manifestaion on your skin after witnessing wrinkles, aging-skin etc. & I always thought the male models were the 'adonis' are u a model?

look well my dear friend, read and understand what I wrote. I said I do not need creams to make me lighter and there was no where I ever mentioned wrinkling or ageing. Now when it comes to wrinkling and ageing, most people have practically decided to take the easy way out by applying creams for these but they can not exercise for up to 6hrs in a month to keep their body and heart young; neither can they take time to eat properly. most people have never opened a tin of liquid milk and drank it till finish how much more to drink up to 20 in a full year, most people will never buy cheap 100 tomatoes, wash it and eat it all up, most people will never buy 6 or more apples, or a full pineapple or full water melon and eat them up for lunch, some will never eat a full fish in a week or drink up to 1 litre of water per day yet they want to keep using creams and be void of wrinkles and have an ageless skin. I will not run to creams to chase wrinkles and have an ageless skin. even with all the creams in the world, people like Madonna still use botox and surgery to chase wrinkles and stay ageless.

Anybody can be a model. Even dwarfs and imps are now used as runway models and photoshoot models. there are categories of models. as for Adonis, here is the meaning.

Adonis\ə-ˈdä-nəs, -ˈdō-\
noun
1 : a youth loved by Aphrodite who is killed at hunting by a wild boar and restored to Aphrodite from Hades for a part of each year
2 : a very handsome young man
Origin: Latin, from Greek Adōnis.
First use: 1565

5minsmadness:

And you had to post the entire book

Pls sir, no vex. the poster was only trying to be helpful and you would have gone through the whole BOOK weda u read it here or click on the link.
thanks @ DYT

we had sex for the first time. something happened that scared me into confusion. everything was going on fine till she was about to have an orgasm and she held her belly like she was in very deep pains and then she lay on he belly. i thought she was going to die or something because of the way she was writhing and rolling, it was obvious that something was not right. she said she had cramps and she also felt like vomiting. I tried to touch her to see how i could help her but I was shocked when she spoke and told me that she was fine and it was cramps that got her.
she said this happens to her whenever she has an orgasm and when she is ovulating. she was so sad and cried bitterly because it was affecting her sex life as she is a sexually active female and this has made her become scared of having sex thereby ruining her previous relationships.

I am really worried about her and I have never ever seen or heard of such a thing before but I know there are so many smart women and health professionals on nairaland. so i am asking, has any lady here experienced such a thing or you know someone who suffered the same ? how did you or they overcome or manage it ? doctors and health professionals, have you any idea what this could be ? any experiences ? any solution to this ?

[size=16pt]NOTE[/size] - I have tried to do some search about this on google. all i could find was personal experiences of women who have suffered stuff like this but I did not see any of the coming up with solutions to this. so i think it would be better if we get information from Nigerian woman and health pros concerning this and maybe someone might have a medical or traditional solution to this.

cc Ishilove

?

i am a Black Adonis. Tall, dark, well built with the body of a sexy god. I don't need to lighten my skin.

PrettyHausaGirl:

I know the risks and I always put measures to check them. I cannot risk the disappointment of a fatal-sexlife marriage.

well said.

is this for real or for nollywood ?

Captainswag225:
oh my word., am not ready for a heartbreak. Madrid win dis game.

did someone mention heartbreak ?

Bcole:
Bros if you cant trust him then don't call him your friend, doesn't seem like a scam to me, if he wanted to scam you he would have asked you to pay all of it or offered to pay a lesser amount..give it a trial...

hahaahahaha
so people still talk about trust in this world? even when money is involved ? wow!

if this is not a scam then I will meet that UR FRIEND anywhere and give him a handshake plus 100 thousand naira cash.

this is nothing new. they keep doing this shiet.

godoluwa:
talk 2 her & if she refuse to change, beat the hell out of her.

beat the hell out of her?

just the way white people were beating and hanging our fathers on trees and shipping them to America just for being black ?

Just the way some men beat women mentally, physically and emotionally because they feel they are the STRONGER sex ?

and it goes on and on.

why don't u just tell the OP to bring the babe to u so u can use a knife and cut her open and remove the LESBIAN ELEMENTS in her and replace it with the one that will not make u beat her ? since u seem to know the solution to her problem.

have u asked her if she is a lesbian ?

Look her in the eye and ask her if she is a lesbian and let her answer you without a loud yes or no.

weda she says Yes/No, Let her know that you consider such as a terrible damnating abomination and would not associate yourself with such people because of your religious beliefs. Tell her loudly without trying to judge her.

do not listen to people who say u should boot her out. would u boot her out if she was your younger sister ? would you accept her more if she was bringing men to your house or toasting men instead of women as u say she does ? your friend says God will not answer your prayers as long as she is living under ur roof. but if u wer stranded and not so lucky to have that house, would u say u will not pray if a lesbian shows you care and gives you shelter ? will u stand aside if people come to drag her out of ur house for being a lesbian ?

I really do not know why there are gay and lesbian people in this world but I don't think it is in our place to judge them.

the only thing I see wrong is that she is allegedly bringing her partners into your house and I consider that to be very disrespectful and callous of her if that is true. it is just like smoking weed inside the house, very unacceptable but I will not judge u for smoking weed. smoke whatever u want as long as u don't bring it to my house.

even me as a grown man wey like toto, i do hardly ever bring girls to the house if I am outside my own apartment that I am paying for.

Talk to her bro, but don't judge her.

800K. and what was her actual asking price? cos 800K looks like the buyer priced down the commodity from 5,000,000 to 800K

Givers never Lack
Beggers always ask.
the girl for list out all her family problems for u naw.

WILDEST DREAMS by Taylor Swift

Confident by Justin Beiber

DOWNTOWN - Mackelmore and Ryan Lewis

looks like a sports bet prediction.

[size=16pt]NIGERIAN POLICE HAS NEVER EVER COLLECTED BRIBE OR PAID RANSOM SINCE 1400BC TILL DATE
.........AND IT WILL NEVER EVER HAPPEN[/size].

i dare anyone to say that three times with a straight face without laughing

OH she is now called CONTROVERSIAL ?
i guess she must be loving that title.

[size=16pt]I remember when people were really worthy of such a title.. people like FELA.
But now, this is what we call CONTROVERSIAL and put on front page. #famewhores[/size]

nice one

street code says

DON'T EVER EVER TURN A WH0RE INTO A HOUSEWIFE... DON'T DO IT.

by the way....... does her name start with G and end with A ?

anigbajumo:



Where is dat comma?


Is dat da first time u ar seeing lolz instead of lol?


"For every action"

Punctuation marks,Zero....

hahaha hahahaha make una come see this guy oh.
you are the one who started this correction thingy.
"" is used when you are trying to quote someone but in this case, I said it by myself and not really trying to credit the words to anyone if not it would have beenput this way: Issac Newton said "for every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction"
bros.. you are dealing with someone who scored 88 in english in JAMB examinations of year 2000. but you know say sometimes we just dey write anyhow on freestyle

plappville:



I think it is a culture thing for most Nigeria Christians to over do things. Most are self righteous. Believing they are the first to know God and will be the first to see Christ at his second coming. I call it Outward Christianity. The heart of a man is the very first key.



This has nothing to do with believing in God or not. It is "Common Grace" from the Creator to all mankind. You believe or not u will still die, be rich or poor, sick or health, marry and have kids, eat or hungry etc. The word "common" here means something that is common to all pple and is not restricted to believers or to the elect only. In distinction from common grace, the grace of God tht brings pple to salvation is often called "saving grace". Of course, when we talk about "common grace" and "saving grace" we are not implying tht there re two different kinds of grace in God himself, but only tht God's grace manifests itself in the world in two different ways. Common grace is different from saving grace in its results *it does not bring about salvation*, in its recipients (its given to believers and unbelievers alike).




D problem here is tht it is not God’s desire to just convince pple that he exists. But his desire for people to believe in him by faith. See (2 Peter 3:9) and accept by faith His gift of salvation (John 3:16). God has proved his existence many tyms in the OT (Genesis 6-9; Exodus 14:21-22; 1 Kings 18:19-31). Did the people believe tht God exists? Of course yes. Did dey turn 4rom their evil ways and obey God? Of course no. If a man is not willin to accpt God’s existence by faith, then he is definitely not ready to accept Jesus Christ as Savior by faith (Ephesians 2:8-9).

Yes i have Christ. But an athiest does not. John 6:26 Jesus answered, the work of God is this:to believe in the one he has sent. And Roman 10:9 If you confess with your mouth tht Jesus is Lord and believed in your heart that God raised him from dead, you will be Saved.

I find it very annoying when someone who (let us assume) does not know anything about the Bible and God, asks a question such as this maybe so that he/she can learn from Christians and then we see Christians come to give answers but all they can do is to quote the Bible and tell us what John, Paul, Mathew, Moses and the rest said without being able to say how it personally concerns or affects them.

WHAT HAS GOD DONE FOR YOU? this is a very plain question void of ambiguity that demands a firm and personal answer as it concerns you personally but here we have people quoting the Bible and not really answering the question posed by MzNelly.

chybykee:
Yes/No who we go ask?
For Me, I don't eat with who I didn't starve with
#

i know u.

God Abeg oh

OUR PEOPLE SAY dog wey go lost go first no hear him owner whistle. this is how it starts.


dont ever turn a WH0RE into a housewife. Dont do it.