₦airaland Forum

virginprincess:
You also sent me a pm, .

Yup... check your mail.

Johnamooh5:
Many sweet marriages have crumbled or on the verge of crumbling when the issues of the child or the children DNA pop up.

Saturday gist bring you this big question.

Is it right for a Man to secretly do a DNA Test for all his children without telling his wife?

If your answer is in the affirmative tell us why you think so.

And if your answer is in the negative tell us why it is so.

Please be objective in your opinion.

For me I think it's right most especially when you're having trust issues with her.

There's nothing as painful as growing up to realise that the kids whom you nurtured, loved, fed... etc, aren't yours. Many men wouldn't survive the aftermath of that devastating revelation.

For me, if I married my wife as a virgin, I won't bother much about DNA cos virgin females rarely cheat in marriages unless you're deliberately maltreating them and making them feel bad.

If I didn't marry her as a virgin, and I'm noticing some funny calls and chats she makes every now and then, then I'll do it. But it would be secretly. She won't even know. If the kids are mine, it would remain a secret I'll carry to my grave, no one will know about what I did. If they aren't, hmmm... God forbid tho, but that marriage is over.

CarlScott:
*Run From Séx! (the Invisible Enemy!)*

Séx is an invisible force/enemy that is working against you! The moment you started to have premarital séx, you would start to connect yourself to your partner, and anything that happens in his/her life would affect you and cause you to have failures and disappointments!
So stay away from premarital séx and live a single and meaningful life!

Some of those that you have séx with are possessed by unclean spirits, and those spirits can influence or even oppress you without your permission — because you connected yourself to them through séx.

I agree with you. Premarital sex is evil

virginprincess:
Did you send me a pm that i didn't reply.

Hmmm... that would be me not him.

Honestly I don't know why ladies do this nonsense. How can you be sending nudes to someone who hasn't paid your bride price?

What if you guys breakup, then what?

I remember during my NYSC, one of the female corper in my lodge gave me her phone to help her send movies via my laptop, I took the phone into my room and starting sending, then went to her gallery to confirm if the sent ones was actually there, and lo and behold I saw lots and lots of her nude pics and even short nude videos of herself opening her legs and displaying her boobs.

I used to see her as someone who's decent but that incident changed my perception towards her. What if it was a pervert who she gave her phone to, he'll happily transfer them to his phone and start uploading them online.

Ladies should be wise. Your body is your asset, guard it with jealousy.

oaselemi:
Betting has no correlation with living long.

Haven't you heard people commiting suicide as a result of the amount of money they lost in betting?

See eeh, women are stubborn very stubborn. When you stay with them you'll understand what I'm saying. If they don't want to do something, no matter what you say to them, they won't listen to you. And marriage makes you both equal unlike relationships where the girl might be pretending so that you can commit to her. So she'll most likely do almost anything you want her to do. Marriage isn't like that.

Some women won't take their morning bath, till around 5-8pm in the night. Morning bath o. They will be stinking like septic tanks and when you tell them to bath they'll tell you they don't have strength or they're feeling cold. This alone irritates men.

Others start dressing like grandmas once they give birth. Tying wrapper and wearing adieu papa shirt from morning till night. How do you expect a man to be attracted to you like that, when there are bum shorts and sexy tops you can put on that can make him postpone any irrelevant outing he has just to be with you.

Finally women don't care much about their bodies once they get married. They feel all those creams, soaps, hairs, keeping fit, watching weight... etc are for single ladies who are looking for husbands, therefore once they get married they forget about them all.

Let me tell you one thing about husband snatchers. They bath well and regularly, dress neat, look clean, keep fit, prepare good meals for your husband, listen to him when he's troubled, offer him advice, give him their shoulder to lean on whenever you nag him at home...with time he'll start preferring her to you.

It's the responsibility of every woman remain neat, sexy, sexual attractive, loving, respectful, caring... etc. For her husband. Once you possess these qualities, believe me, he won't cheat on you.

If you're waiting for a man to tell you how to dress or how to look, or when to take your bath, or what and what not to eat, then just know that you'll loose your husband in the nearest Future.

FalseProphet1:
As a prophet I don't see any Nigerian girl buying gift for her guy

False prophet for that matter.

The problem I have with single mothers is that most of them are selfish and self-centered. It's always about them and their kids.

They care less about you, and use emotional blackmail to trap you into committing your finances to them and their kids.

Some are good tho, but a vast majority are terrible, very terrible.

The wife definitely has been having a secret affair with the guy, and has collected large sums of money from him without the knowledge of her husband. Now the guy feels he owns her, that's why he has the boldness to threaten to disorganized their family.

No toaster would have the boldness to call a married woman at an odd time of the night and even threaten the husband. Fear wouldn't even allow him try it. Unless he has had or is having something with the woman.

The husband is very foolish for not using his common sense to know that both his wife and the stranger are making fool out of him.

She's pressurizing you cos age isn't on her side. If you ditch her it's going to take a while before she can find a guy who will commit to her like you did, and that will be crossing into the age bracket that scares most single ladies a lot...her thirties.

You on the other hand needs finances to start and maintain a family. Marriage is money, family is money. No matter how a girl professes her love for you, once finance becomes a rate commodity in that marriage, her love will fly out through the window.

So get a job, this one you left Lagos and came to ibadan, to me there are much better job opportunities in Lagos than ibadan. Keep trying, and continue to be prayerful. God will grant you your heart desires.

And you shouldn't be the only one hunting for a job, encourage her to put in more efforts as well since she herself is a graduate.

Good luck.

Kennyswag:
I just saw a video of a nigerian lady being fingered by Libya rebels... she was tired, stripped naked and fingered...
thunder kill those wicked Arabs

So where is the video?

BaddieFreak:
Nigerian guys are not intelligent and intellectual. Every guys I have ever met always want to have sex with me. None can engage me in an intellectual debate for long before they get bored, they have nothing on their brain except to have sex.
Example is romance section, all they talk about is sex and nothing intelligent I wonder what kind of children this male generation will be breeding, I spit on you all.

Learn to engage in intelligent conversation with women, not everything is sex and BJs

You all keep saying you need an intelligent and independent woman but how many of you can keep up with an intelligent woman,none! Shame on you guys.

When i engage with white men, I always sense the difference, why are our men like this? Are you all afraid of intelligent conversation or is it the frustration of the country that is getting on our men. They should stop this asap so as not to breed weak and insecure boys in the future

Only few are different though.


I am tired of all this BS!

1. Change the kind of guys you meet in real life, and the way you dress and relate with them.

When you hang out with irresponsible men, they'll always keep reminding you that they're irresponsible. So check the kind of people you move with.

Secondly, they say first impression matters a lot, my dear it's so true. If you're always dressing to kill, when guys look at you, no matter how responsible they might look, the only thing they will want from you is sex cos that's what your dressing is saying. Most won't have the patience to gist with you. They'll see you as this hot runs babe who they can fúck with very little effort.

I remember when I was still a student, there was this nudist in my lodge, everyone wanted to have a taste of her coochie. One day she called me and said why do all guys behave like goats, I can barely sustain a discussion with any of you guys without them talking about sex.

I simply told her, change the way you dress, and guys will change their approach towards you. So please so this, it works like magic.

2. When a girl is too materialistic. Take it or leave it. No matter how decent a girl might dress or look, if she's the materialistic type, almost every guy that she comes across would initiate sex chats and even want sex with her.

Truth is not every guy can sustain a friendship (not even relationship in this case) where he's spending excessively on a girl. So he gives her the little he can afford, and tries to access her coochie. If he's successful, he'll have it to his satisfaction then hit the road in search of a much better and affordable coochie.

3. Most guys here romance section are below 20years. Some have boldly opened up on their age so what do you expect? They're probably living with their parents and haven't had the chance to experience life hence their desire for sex and sex and more of it...

Happy new year.

Preciousgirl:
It is common to see
A handsome man with a very beautiful wife
Descend very low to have affair with a girl way way below her wife's class, beauty and charm

You could see a man with a beautiful wife having affairs with his little and ugly househelp or some orange seller or a little student

And they say every dirty water fit quench fire
.
Guys, why is this So?

And we also see beautiful women with handsome and educated husbands having affairs with their driver, gateman, Gardner, houseboy... etc. If I may ask why is this so?

Stay away from betting and you will live long

sawer:
pls what drugs can I use to make someone sleep off

You want to drug and rape someone's child ba, is that why you're asking?

virginprincess:
Exactly, most nairaland men are too partial for my liking, the people the women are cheating with are men, so why accusing only one gender.

I believe it has to do with the culture here in Africa. Polygamy is widely accepted in Africa and Nigeria respectively so the issue of the man cheating is easily overlooked cos in most cultures, he's expected to officially bring more women home.

But when a woman cheats, it's seen as a taboo, cos our culture expects the woman to keep herself for her husband regardless of whatever she's going through in her marriage. It's her duty to remain submissive. This is where the accusations comes in. Cos it's an abomination for her to cheat.

Unfortunately, our parents who are supposed to teach their male children the dangers of polygamy ignore that lesson, leaving men to grow up with this terrible womanizing mentality, and even if they don't practice polygamy directly by marrying numerous wives, they will do it indirectly by not being faithful to their wife when they get married.

That's the Genesis of the whole problem....our culture.

I thought customs duty was supposed to reduce to 5% by January, what happened? Why are cars still so expensive, I was even planing to change my old Corolla for camary preferable 2011 model sef this January.

In relationships and marriages, if you serve your husband or guy food, courtesy demands that you clear up the dishes when he's done. Most especially if he's the one that provided the money for that food.

Normally, it's nothing special, it's just an African culture. Most females are brought up that way to clear up and wash the dishes, and most guys are trained to believe that it's not their duty to clear up after eating.

Humanoid01:
We really need to start making our mental health a priority in this country.

Exactly, everyone seems to have lost it mentally all of a sudden.

Thinee:
This is what I'll do then , thanks

You're welcome. Good luck.

themaestro08:
After pill and plan-b one step are highly effective. You are literally a fool(no apology) for saying things you know nothing about. Educate your ignorant ass, save your energy and never in your dumb life quote me to say rubbish .

Please go back to school, I don't have the strength to start schooling a stark illiterate. Also learn to read and understand properly before dumping your frustration on me.

I never said pills weren't effective I said taking them excessively can lead to harmful side effects. I even gave you a particular drug which is clearly written that you mustn't take it more than twice in a month. Meaning regardless of how many times the girl has sex in the month the chemical components of the drug she took once or twice, can sustain her and eliminate the sperm cells deposited in her vagina.

Sometimes fear can make some girls ignore the warning and take more than the required dosage, thereby exposing their womb to possible damage.

Some worm medicines are like that, the instruction written clearly is that you take it every 6months, that's the required dosage, taking more than what is written will definitely lead to complications.

Next time learn to read. It won't cost you anything.

Thinee:
I'm scared of been jilted on.... I'm scared of disappointment, you know nigeria girls , their matter nor good!!.... That's what if making me scared....if she come leave me nko?

Stop sounding like a child. Have you put yourself in her shoes, what if she gives you have virginity and you leave her what then? Cos from the way you're sounding here, you're the one who's most likely to abscond once you get what you want not she. That's why she's having mixed feelings towards sleeping with you cos she's even more scared than you are.

Work towards growing your relationship with her, go and see her parents, let them at least know you even if you aren't ready financially, let them know that you're serious with their daughter. Not crying everyday for her panties.

Thinee:
1. I'm not , she knows all my contacts I don't even lock my phone, I even showed her my convo with a girl that wanted a relationship with me , she was ready to do all....even when I told her I had a girlfriend she said shes okay with being my second girlfriend and I should be having sex with her, my girl saw everything

2. I only yell at her....Ive never beaten her, and after I yell at her ,once I'm calm I draw her closer and fell her the reason why I acted that way....and also apologize to her


3. I'm not the kinda guys that lie about themselves because of pussy ..she knows me more than I even know her self...


4.tho I'm interested in sex, but I care about everything.... I'm even putting her through what I'm doing so she could also make money for herself........even planning on opening a store for her cus where I am is a really busy student area so I've got lot of plans

5. Not at all

6.im not bossy, tho I love been in control of my girl

7. She is ...tho not everything

8.she does enjoy it ..and even get angry sometimes when I go out with my friends, she prefers us spending time together

9. I complain I know.....but I don't see any issue as irrelevant


So I don't see any reason why she's still acting this way

So what is it you're afraid of? Why not wait like she suggested and focus on your business, that should be more important to you than popping her Cherry.

themaestro08:
The condom, the contraceptive pill, as well as the implant. Further more you have the contraceptive ring and the injection variant. All are highly effective and safe to use. It boils down to which suit you best.

Keep in mind there are many contraception pharmaceutical companies out there and quality differs.

You said it's 91% effective. I asked you to name any contraceptive drug that's 91% effective you can't.

Stop issuing out advise when you can't back it up with proof.

Those things are tash. Taking a drug to kill a sperm cell in your womb is as dangerous as drinking a full cup of salt to cure stomach ache. Of course the salt solution will work at first, but when it becomes constant, the side effects will be distastrous, that's how the contraceptives is. It definitely will work but when it becomes a routine, your womb becomes weakened and unable to retain a pregnancy.

That's why some of them like "Azurette" will clearly tell you to take it once or twice in a month. Cos they won't be held responsible when you loose your womb due to overdose.