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Jokes Etc / GCFR For Dame Patience (a Satire) by patostation(m): 4:34am On Jan 17, 2015 |
President Goodluck Jonathan will be honoring his wife, the first lady, Dame Patience Jonathan with the award of GCFR (Grammer Commander of the Federal Republic). Sources said this award is due to the immense contributions of the first lady to the propagation of spoken English in Nigeria. Another reason for this pretigious award is that the first lady has grammatically affected a lot of lives with her speeches which make Nigerians to laugh and forget their sorrows. According to the President, this singular act has helped to increase the lifespan of an average Nigerian by cutting down hypertension in the land. Here are some examples of her award-winning speeches: *Nigeria is a great CONTINENT *My husband and Sambo IS good people *I rather kill myself than commit suicide *My fellow Widows *I travelled abroad to Rest In Peace *My husband is the best COUPLE on earth *The doctors are responding to treatment *Ojukwu is dead but his manhood lives on *Na only you waka come? *Chaei!!, chaei!! Diariz Godu o *For those who say I SPEECH bad English, I LEFT them for God. Please support and honor the Nigerian First Lady by sharing with your friends and loved ones! Don't laugh alone. |
Politics / Re: MEND Leader, Henry Okah Was Paid To Assassinate Me - Jonathan by patostation(m): 7:23pm On Jan 08, 2015 |
Ilekeh: Bringing SENTIMENT and currying SYMPATHY can no longer divert our attention from the real issues. Lets hear of your performance and your future plans Oga Jona 2 Likes |
Politics / Re: Photo Of President Jonathan's Younger Sister Who Died Yesterday by patostation(m): 12:17pm On Jan 05, 2015 |
At a young age of 52! It's a pity, the Jonathan family has witnessed a string of losses in recent times. May God comfort the bereaved. |
Nairaland / General / Re: What Would You Do If You See This At A Junction? by patostation(m): 6:31pm On Jan 03, 2015 |
Nairaland / General / Re: What Would You Do If You See This At A Junction? by patostation(m): 6:27pm On Jan 03, 2015 |
datguru: Lol! And then find one of those banks that is always disturbing me to open an account. Let the Bank Teller count the whole money by himself. Any amount wey e say na im dey there, make e lodge am for my account, after I go get balance alert. 1 Like |
Religion / Re: Photos: Pastor Adeboye & Deeper Life GO Pastor Kumuyi Visit Governor Fayose by patostation(m): 8:27am On Dec 26, 2014 |
"Men of God"! They can even visit the devil; of course on courtesy call. |
Politics / Re: N21bn Donation: We Can’t Probe Donors, Says INEC!! by patostation(m): 8:01am On Dec 26, 2014 |
FolarinLondon: Oluwole means jibiti, forgery, fake, fraud. Osaze means "player". Uzzi mean means a high caliber machine gun. Now put two and two together. Fela would say, 'one answer you go get'! |
Nairaland / General / Re: State Of Ikeja Shop Rite On Xmas Day(pictures) by patostation(m): 1:51am On Dec 26, 2014 |
merieam16: Actually, Shoprite has become a sort of "tourist centre" for Nigerans. Schools go there for escursion, families go to feed their eyes, and many more go there to "look around" during festivities. Make Boko Haram no remember us for here o! |
Politics / Re: Buhari Joins Twitter, Read His First Tweets.. by patostation(m): 7:37pm On Dec 22, 2014 |
kwaraauto: News! 88 year old candidate wins Tunisia Election. Both candidates in the run-off election are said to be over 85 years of age. Even here in Nigeria OBJ was over 70 when he ruled Nigeria democratically. Where there are two options, the electorate will go for the better candidate, whether he is old or young. 2 Likes |
Politics / Re: Photos From Military Ambush Attack That Killed Over 100 Boko Haram Terrorists by patostation(m): 9:50am On Dec 21, 2014 |
Today, GEJ's Nigerian Army will REPEL and PUSH BACK Boko Haram insurgents. Tomorrow we will hear that Boko Haram has seized many towns and villages. One step forward, five steps backward! We need a real commander-in-chief of the armed forces. We also fit army commanders, not all those politicized, unfit and potbellied "generals" |
Romance / Re: 10 Facts That Still Make U Single by patostation(m): 5:56am On Dec 20, 2014 |
Especially those ladies that have made some money, that come from a comfortable background or those with well-paying jobs. They look down on every suitor as if to say, "how much has he got"? Pride, pompousity and arrogance go a long way in denying them a home of their own |
Celebrities / Re: Marriage Not On My Mind – Timaya by patostation(m): 5:29am On Dec 20, 2014 |
Marriage is not on your mind but "ukwu" and "ikebe" have taken over your soul |
Celebrities / Re: Photo: Chief Tony Anenih & His Young Wife by patostation(m): 11:01pm On Dec 19, 2014 |
By the way what happened to Mama Josephine Anenih? Did she divorce Mr Fix it or she allowed him to marry a younger wife? |
Religion / Re: How Do You Know Your Religion Or Denomination Is The Right One by patostation(m): 9:49am On Dec 14, 2014 |
McSterling: And that is the important point. Did you choose your religion or is it the religion of your parents?; or is it the religion of your tribe? Did you make a careful research or analysis before choosing your religion? Another area of consideration is the fruitage of your present religion, its adherents and the leaders. Are they involved in wars, terrorism, racism, immorality or other controversies? According to Jesus, by their fruit you will know them (Mt 7:20-23), Love will define true worshippers (Jn 13:34,35), there ought to be one faith (Eph 4:5,6). 1 Like |
Celebrities / Re: New Photo Of 9ice And Baby Mama With Their Daughter by patostation(m): 10:52pm On Dec 08, 2014 |
Nice to know that 9ice is looking nice. His family look nice too |
Politics / Re: Anyim Emerges APC Governorship Flag Bearer In Abia by patostation(m): 3:49pm On Dec 06, 2014 |
patostation: |
Politics / Re: Anyim Emerges APC Governorship Flag Bearer In Abia by patostation(m): 3:30pm On Dec 06, 2014 |
Bryan12: I am looking foprward to seeing a third Anyim or even a forth one, to confirm if fatness and obesity is linked to all Anyims |
Religion / Re: Chris Oyakhilome Releases New Lovely Pictures After Divorce Scandal by patostation(m): 3:09pm On Dec 06, 2014 |
whinnie: I hope you are not one of the "fine girls" distracting the "man of God", those urging him on and making him to pursue rats while his house is on fire. |
Religion / Re: Chris Oyakhilome Releases New Lovely Pictures After Divorce Scandal by patostation(m): 2:48pm On Dec 06, 2014 |
damosky12: "Call no man your father upon the earth..." (Mt 23:9). Are you are a learner? Even then, only God can be reverred. Reverring or "Reverending" a fellow human is called idolatory (Mt 4:10). 3 Likes |
Religion / Re: Chris Oyakhilome Releases New Lovely Pictures After Divorce Scandal by patostation(m): 2:31pm On Dec 06, 2014 |
kITATITA: I agree with you intoto. But I have to add that Pastor Chris is one of those pentecostal "men of God" giving christianity a bad name. Jesus spoke of a painted sepulchre (white-washed grave) and about religious leaders who do not allow people to enter God's kingdom and they themselves refuse to enter! All these events maped out for the "man of God's birthday, what are their spiritual value? All that glitters is not gold! 3 Likes |
NYSC / Re: Ekiti Loses A Corps Member by patostation(m): 12:40am On Dec 03, 2014 |
This same Ekiti that gunmen freed prisoners two days ago? An Ekiti where 6 assemblymen impeached the speaker in a house of 23? Fayoshe's Ekiti where lawlessness is gradually becoming a norm. Ekiti people, so this is what you chose? 1 Like |
Politics / Re: SSS Raids APC Data Office Again - Party Spokesman by patostation(m): 7:35pm On Dec 02, 2014 |
A man whose house is on fire cannot be busy pursuing rats _ an Ibo proverb. Anyone you give a proverb and offer the meaning, the money used in marrying his/her mother is a waste _ an Ibo saying The fly that does not hear word will soon be buried together with a dead body _ an Ibo proverb While Boko Haram is bombing city after city and seizing town after town, and kidnapping, killing and maiming Nigerians, our 'talented' security operatives are busy raiding APC offices day after day. Una welldone o! Make una search dem wella wella, maybe na there una go catch Shekau. 2 Likes |
Education / Re: SCIENTISTS BAFFLED BY MYSTERIOUS SHIELD PROTECTING EARTH FROM BEING OBLITERATED. by patostation(m): 5:08pm On Dec 02, 2014 |
wordcat: My dear, your statement presupposes that atheists, agnostics and and animists are the only ones interested in making new discoveries. It may interest you to know that there are Jewish scientists, Muslim scientists, Christendom scientists and Christian scientists as well. Some are working to prove Darwin right while others are searching to prove him wrong. But they are all "scientists" anyway. |
Education / Re: SCIENTISTS BAFFLED BY MYSTERIOUS SHIELD PROTECTING EARTH FROM BEING OBLITERATED. by patostation(m): 4:46pm On Dec 02, 2014 |
plaetton: At least you are aware that apart from our earth, there is no other planet that supports life. Is human, animal and plant life not worth protecting? If it is not God's work, may be na your work be that. By your own 'special knowledge', you have accepted that the earth already have many layers of protection. So who put the protection (Heb 3:4 says that every house is built by someone but that the one who built all things is God). Wisdom of this world! |
Education / Re: SCIENTISTS BAFFLED BY MYSTERIOUS SHIELD PROTECTING EARTH FROM BEING OBLITERATED. by patostation(m): 4:06pm On Dec 02, 2014 |
Raise up your eyes and see.......Who created these things? Isaiah 40:26 It is the one who brings out their army by number, he calls them all by name. Because of his vast dynamic energy and his awe-inspiring power, not one of them is missing. Isa 40:26 |
Education / Re: SCIENTISTS BAFFLED BY MYSTERIOUS SHIELD PROTECTING EARTH FROM BEING OBLITERATED. by patostation(m): 3:51pm On Dec 02, 2014 |
When I see your heavens, the work of your fingers, the moon and the stars that you have prepared; What is human being that you keep him in mind..and take care of him? Ps 8:3,4 The heavens are declaring the glory of God, the SKIES above proclaim the work of his hands. Day after day....night after night they reveal knowledge. There is no speach, and there are no words. Their voice is not heard, but into all the earth their message goes... Ps 19:1-4. |
Education / Re: SCIENTISTS BAFFLED BY MYSTERIOUS SHIELD PROTECTING EARTH FROM BEING OBLITERATED. by patostation(m): 3:36pm On Dec 02, 2014 |
God produced me at the beginning of his way......when he had not yet made the earth and its FIELDS ..... When he prepared the heavens I was there, when he marked out the HORIZON ....when he established the CLOUDS above, when he founded the fountains of the deep oceans, when he set a boundary for the sea....I was beside him as a master architect. Prov. 8:22-30 (of Jesus life before he came to the earth) Compare Gen 1:26, Jn 8:52-59, Heb 1:1,2 |
Education / Re: SCIENTISTS BAFFLED BY MYSTERIOUS SHIELD PROTECTING EARTH FROM BEING OBLITERATED. by patostation(m): 3:09pm On Dec 02, 2014 |
Raise up your eyes and see.......Who created these things? Isaiah 40:26 Where were you when I founded the earth? Tell me if you think you have understanding. Who set the measurements...... Who barricaded the seas....Where were you when I wrapped the earth with clouds. Job 38:4-10 |
Politics / Re: PVC: Fashola, Wife’s Name Missing At Polling Unit by patostation(m): 7:52am On Nov 29, 2014 |
Goddex: Make dem go tell that story to the marines, say "data crash". Abi na one computer INEC get or them never hear of back-up? Even if their computer spoil eeh, make dem carry am go meet computer engineer make e remove the Hard Drive naa. Abi dem no fit get computer engineers? Abi dem wan use style disenfranchise some people? Make dem talk true o. 3 Likes |
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