cococandy:


Not only exaggerated. Shows the poster was not posting from a position of correct information

zed7:
Does it ever end? I can understand the request from people who are sick and can't afford medical bills. What irks me the most is those who after enjoying the pleasures of ejaculation start nagging you for money because they just had a baby or need money for school fees.
I always say I wouldn't give again but I still end up giving. I have always made it a point not to stress myself. I give what wouldn't dent my own resources. If you need 50k, I can give 10k, go source for the rest yourself.

sweetmelanin:


I don't blame them. I blame the gullible ones abroad who keep sending their hard earned money for others to squander. God forbid I send a dime to anybody back home - when I'm not an ATM machine.

Tommorow its these same people that will start bad mouthing you that abroad people are "living in cubicle, they are broke, they pay bills, they work menial jobs" etc.... but they are shameless enough to beg money from you

eazzzy1:
Are you a Nigerian? do you have friends and family in diaspora or home who are doing well for themselves but will ignore your request to send money all the time? before you call them stingy or wicked, here are some of the reasons why rich friends do not give out money;

1. They don't have enough: Enough is subjective, someone can earn as much as $100,000/annum but feel he's not earning enough, some people have these dreams of being wealthy and that salary isn't sufficient to get them there. So you have a friend/relative who works in a big firm abroad, you think he's rich, he thinks he isn't earning enough. Even millionaires have needs too.

2. You are not the only one making financial demands: You think you are his best friend because you went to secondary school together and were seat mate or bunk mates in the hostel so automatically he should be predisposed to meeting your needs, well there are primary school best friends, university best friends, first love, NYSC best friends, Neighbours, uncles, aunties, brothers etc who think their request should be met too. It is impossible to meet all these needs.

3. Making financial demand is never a one time thing: I had this habit of giving money to people who ask for financial favors the first time. I thought since they never asked for such before, they must really be in need. I soon found out that after that first time they run to me whenever they need money again, sometimes they space out the request like two months, some every month etc. I then realize that the $100, $200 i send them is never going to be sufficient, they will always come back for more. So i joined the God will provide gang.

4. Yahoo boys : Not every fraudster hacks into companies accounts, or forge the accountants signature, or even find lonely older women/men to scam. Some yahoo boys have resorted to begging, they send you message of how their dad is dying in the hospital, how their sister got arrested for a crime she didn't commit and they need a lawyer bla bla, they call these lies format and once you send them money they pop champagne and call you client.

5. General realization : One day i was going through my bank statement and i noticed i gave out about $500 monthly to family and friends. The same me who will walk into H & M, see a shirt of $40 and think it's too costly. I either buy it grudgingly or wait till it's on sale to buy. I realized i wasn't taking care of myself enough. Most people will come to this realization at a point in their lives.

This thread isn't limited to just people abroad, it include people who work and earn who are home based too. How do you cope with demands?Diasporans what made you rethink your generousity?

Feel free to add yours.

eazzzy1:


Lol. Nobody makes $100,000 and ends up with $40,000 after deductions. Anyway this is not a homebased vs diasporan thread. How do you cope with the people abroad making financial request?

EVILFOREST:

May GOD BLESS YOU.
I have suffered.
...... I used to have a FRIEND whom I have always made effort to chat up with while in Nigeria. Every Effort I made was treated with Levity.
But since he got to know that I relocated to ABROAD, MENNN he now calls like I owe him a lot.

.....a COUSIN of MINE called and told me how he was arrested by POLICE for Theft. He told me he was calling from the POLICE STATION. I now beckoned on him to give the phone to any Officer, and again that I would call the policeman I know in Nigeria to intervene, could you believe that it's 3years now since I started waiting for him to handover the PHONE to the Police officers at the station.....

My EX-GIRLFRIENDS want to Kill me.
Including the ones that are successfully married.
I had to open a payment voucher for them to support them. I know NIGERIA is very tough. After all I left just few years back.

bankylan:
You LIED. Nowhere in the world where people pay 60% tax. And whoever is calling you every weekend from abroad to send money to them is obviously an illegal immigrant or students still trying to cope. The fact that you don't know how much they even pay on tax casts doubts on your claims here.

In America or Canada where you gave an instance, they don't pay 60% on their first 100k.

eazzzy1:
Are you a Nigerian? do you have friends and family in diaspora or home who are doing well for themselves but will ignore your request to send money all the time? before you call them stingy or wicked, here are some of the reasons why rich friends do not give out money;

1. They don't have enough: Enough is subjective, someone can earn as much as $100,000/annum but feel he's not earning enough, some people have these dreams of being wealthy and that salary isn't sufficient to get them there. So you have a friend/relative who works in a big firm abroad, you think he's rich, he thinks he isn't earning enough. Even millionaires have needs too.

2. You are not the only one making financial demands: You think you are his best friend because you went to secondary school together and were seat mate or bunk mates in the hostel so automatically he should be predisposed to meeting your needs, well there are primary school best friends, university best friends, first love, NYSC best friends, Neighbours, uncles, aunties, brothers etc who think their request should be met too. It is impossible to meet all these needs.

3. Making financial demand is never a one time thing: I had this habit of giving money to people who ask for financial favors the first time. I thought since they never asked for such before, they must really be in need. I soon found out that after that first time they run to me whenever they need money again, sometimes they space out the request like two months, some every month etc. I then realize that the $100, $200 i send them is never going to be sufficient, they will always come back for more. So i joined the God will provide gang.

4. Yahoo boys : Not every fraudster hacks into companies accounts, or forge the accountants signature, or even find lonely older women/men to scam. Some yahoo boys have resorted to begging, they send you message of how their dad is dying in the hospital, how their sister got arrested for a crime she didn't commit and they need a lawyer bla bla, they call these lies format and once you send them money they pop champagne and call you client.

5. General realization : One day i was going through my bank statement and i noticed i gave out about $500 monthly to family and friends. The same me who will walk into H & M, see a shirt of $40 and think it's too costly. I either buy it grudgingly or wait till it's on sale to buy. I realized i wasn't taking care of myself enough. Most people will come to this realization at a point in their lives.

This thread isn't limited to just people abroad, it include people who work and earn who are home based too. How do you cope with demands?Diasporans what made you rethink your generousity?

Feel free to add yours.

ModestGal:

Stingy man, I don't blame you, I blame where you were raised. This is why sometimes, I'm happy with friends God has attached me with and family. Even though I don't ask anyone of them any money, I know they would be happy to give me anytim e.

sweetmelanin:


Indeed.

Lmaooooooooo!

SweetCunt97:
God bless that special uncle.. Dude was simply a giver, never complains. He always prepares list of people he'd give money to. People far and wide respected him sooo much. He's simply one of a kind.

Best is simply help the relative cross over so they can hustle and help others, no be to dey how many thousands come dey complain anyhow.

timesup234:
you know majority of Nigerians are slaves. They hear america and still vibrating. Americans are dead broke and miserable. Only a fool dont know this

Sweetcho:


Yes I gave my cousin $2500 to buy a car with would you believe after he received the money and bought the car he never even said thanks cousin this is the car I bought! I never heard from him again until the next time they're in need. And it's not a pay me back when you get it loan this is money you will never get back again

sweetmelanin:


I don't blame them. I blame the gullible ones abroad who keep sending their hard earned money for others to squander. God forbid I send a dime to anybody back home - when I'm not an ATM machine.

Tommorow its these same people that will start bad mouthing you that abroad people are "living in cubicle, they are broke, they pay bills, they work menial jobs" etc.... but they are
shameless enough to beg money from you

Shikena:


In fact, Nigerians abroad should stop sending money home & learn how the economy of their resident countries work. Some Nigerians are making a killing everyday in America but most still need to learn to use the financial system without the Nigerian mindset. We need to learn from the Scots, Indians, Pakistanis, Chinese etc. Stop wasting good investment money on useless ventures in Nigeria. You can do that when you have a flourishing business abroad. Just my opinion.

rentAcock:
Abroad people call me every weekend asking me to send money (not bragging). Many of them are frustrated over there. They work long hours including overtime but the government takes federal, state, city, social security, medicare, medicaid and disability taxes. On top of that, when they buy biscuit, they will still take sales tax. They pay exorbitant rent; those who "own" homes are locked in a loan repayment for 30yrs of which they still have to pay annual taxes for their house. Phone bill can cost over $60 per line, cable $120, internet $80 and they still pay tax on top of it. Burger and chips with soft drink can easily cost you $16 plus tax.

Sure some folks are making over $100,000 theoretically especially healthcare workers in expensive states like California and new York, but by the time they deduct all those taxes from their check, they are left with just $40,000. Then they still have to pay more taxes on every thing they buy. That's not life. It's like a rat wheel, oscillating but not making any progress. I have a cousin who was in the same situation in America, after 10yrs working as a social worker, he returned home and we started up a business. He still regrets all the years he spent slaving away in America. Today, he travels the world on vacation and visiting places he didn't even have time to visit when he was living abroad. It's not too late for Nigerians living abroad to return home; you can make it big here with less stress and you will extend your life span.

Thingsvirtous19:
I can totally relate to point 5. Folks..take care of yourself oh. To buy 5k-10k slipper go dey hard me. But I can give out 20k without blinking. Is that life?

It was one of my sweet anty that I give money that yabbed me. She said to me.. Xyz you can give people money but you are stingy to yourself. She also told me to spent not recklessly but well enough to enjoy my money because people will always demand for it from me.

I am grateful for that pep talk. After I have saved and spent to satisfy myself..I can freely give the remaining without lying or feeling guilty.

I also havE special request from folks that no matter what.. I can suspend my "enjoyment" to satisfy them.

Also if relatives wants to borrow a huge sum of money and I have it to spare but I am afraid that it gonna cause rift when I try to recoup my money. I bring in a third party. Mostly fAKE documents stating that the third party lend the money and I am just a witness. God will help us all.

Klass99:


I can relate to this post. I had a school mate schooling and working in Russia. She often had to fall back on money contributed by her siblings in Naija to survive. She didn't stay back after school, she came home.

My own cousin returned from Australia, after his Masters. He said the system over there won't allow you live a very comfortable life. Everything is billed and taxed to a point where, you can hardly afford nice but expensive things for yourself.

He said most of the people he befriended had never been on a plane or travelled outside their states of residence, because by the time they are done paying bills, there's very little left for travel. Travelling for them, would mean a financial plan of 6 or 8 months ahead for that trip.

zed7:
Does it ever end? I can understand the request from people who are sick and can't afford medical bills. What irks me the most is those who after enjoying the pleasures of ejaculation start nagging you for money because they just had a baby or need money for school fees.
I always say I wouldn't give again but I still end up giving. I have always made it a point not to stress myself. I give what wouldn't dent my own resources. If you need 50k, I can give 10k, go source for the rest yourself.

sweetmelanin:


..and what's stopping you from making your own money?

bankylan:
You LIED. Nowhere in the world where people pay 60% tax. And whoever is calling you every weekend from abroad to send money to them is obviously an illegal immigrant or students still trying to cope. The fact that you don't know how much they even pay on tax casts doubts on your claims here.

In America or Canada where you gave an instance, they don't pay 60% on their first 100k.

eazzzy1:
Are you a Nigerian? do you have friends and family in diaspora or home who are doing well for themselves but will ignore your request to send money all the time? before you call them stingy or wicked, here are some of the reasons why rich friends do not give out money;

1. They don't have enough: Enough is subjective, someone can earn as much as $100,000/annum but feel he's not earning enough, some people have these dreams of being wealthy and that salary isn't sufficient to get them there. So you have a friend/relative who works in a big firm abroad, you think he's rich, he thinks he isn't earning enough. Even millionaires have needs too.

2. You are not the only one making financial demands: You think you are his best friend because you went to secondary school together and were seat mate or bunk mates in the hostel so automatically he should be predisposed to meeting your needs, well there are primary school best friends, university best friends, first love, NYSC best friends, Neighbours, uncles, aunties, brothers etc who think their request should be met too. It is impossible to meet all these needs.

3. Making financial demand is never a one time thing: I had this habit of giving money to people who ask for financial favors the first time. I thought since they never asked for such before, they must really be in need. I soon found out that after that first time they run to me whenever they need money again, sometimes they space out the request like two months, some every month etc. I then realize that the $100, $200 i send them is never going to be sufficient, they will always come back for more. So i joined the God will provide gang.

4. Yahoo boys : Not every fraudster hacks into companies accounts, or forge the accountants signature, or even find lonely older women/men to scam. Some yahoo boys have resorted to begging, they send you message of how their dad is dying in the hospital, how their sister got arrested for a crime she didn't commit and they need a lawyer bla bla, they call these lies format and once you send them money they pop champagne and call you client.

5. General realization : One day i was going through my bank statement and i noticed i gave out about $500 monthly to family and friends. The same me who will walk into H & M, see a shirt of $40 and think it's too costly. I either buy it grudgingly or wait till it's on sale to buy. I realized i wasn't taking care of myself enough. Most people will come to this realization at a point in their lives.

This thread isn't limited to just people abroad, it include people who work and earn who are home based too. How do you cope with demands?Diasporans what made you rethink your generousity?

Feel free to add yours.

lekki1444:
OK from a position of correct information how much taxes will someone earning 100k pay and how much will they take home. rough estimate, i know there will be variables like how many kids you have etc but just a rough estimate

monfizzy:
All good points. It’s very tiring when many people are asking for financial help at same time, makes you either priorities who to assist and who not to based on your surplus income. Everybody want something and there’s just not much you can do. Worst is that most of those friends and distant relatives who’re expecting feel entitled and the moment you don’t oblige they start giving you attitude.

Personally, I’ve earmarked about £100-£150 to assist friends and distant relatives every month but it’s never enough as I’ve to split it between 5-10k per person but they still give me the feeling like it’s not enough when I’ve to inconvenient myself with some luxury. Anytime I think of shopping wears/trainers as I’m a lover of sneakers of about £100, I often feel I’m being wasteful as such money will go a long way to help acquaintance back home and often forget the idea of buying them.

While it is true that life is a bit fair in the West, U.K. in particular, it’s never rosy as one has to work hard, offset bills like housing, car insurance etc which can significantly drain one’s income so Nigerians have to learn to be appreciative for every pounds they get and learn to understand when told nwanne today I no get.