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Nairaland / General / Re: Nairalanders !! Its Time For Fun: What Initiated Or Led to your NL Username? by Samfigo1(m): 2:53pm On Jul 10, 2015
Fun indeed! Have you seen madcow before?
Politics / Re: if you dont know any of these, you shouldn't be discussing nigerian politics by Samfigo1(m): 5:12pm On Jul 08, 2015
asadike:
yes my dear. i personally knew d indian, he's a friend of my dad. a very good and kind man. people say he went back with his magic.
cheesy
asadike:
yes my dear. i personally knew d indian, he's a friend of my dad. a very good and kind man. people say he went back with his magic.
what are you showing me on ur dp.... Chei babe! Anyways babe, where do u work?
Politics / Re: if you dont know any of these, you shouldn't be discussing nigerian politics by Samfigo1(m): 5:07pm On Jul 08, 2015
ECOTERRORS:
I used them all and I'm still alive.
Baba God you do well
How old are you ?
Education / Re: Nairaland Interschool Debate Second Edition Winner::FUNAAB -Congratulations- by Samfigo1(m): 8:30am On Jul 07, 2015
FUNAAB; A school planted on the solid rock all other school sorry ground is sinking sand!
Jokes Etc / A Father And His Children's Dream by Samfigo1(m): 9:03pm On Jul 05, 2015
A man went to church on Sunday with his family(his wife and three children), after the church service, the pastor beckoned on the father, when the man got to the pastor, he(the pastor) told the man that God asked him to tell him something. The following conversation ensued thus:
Pastor: Bro... Hmmmn...The lord said I should tell you that you should tell your children not take anything in their dreams because it might be disastrous if they do so.
The father: Alright sir! Thank you Sir I really appreciate.
When the man got home he did not hesitate to call his Children... Sandra! Beatrice!! Junior!!!
The children: SIR!!! (they all echoed)
The father: Pastor told me to tell you not take anything from anybody in your dreams Ok?
The children: Alright Sir!
The father: whatever the person wants to give you in your dream tell me I'll buy it for you, is that understood?
The children: Yes sir!
The children went their way. The first night Sandra had a dream, from her sleep she shouted;
Sandra: Dad! Dad!! Dad!!!
The father: what is it What happened??
Sandra: I had a dream! Somebody wanted to give me Ice cream in my dream but I didnt collect it
The father: it's alright! I'll buy it for you tomorrow.
The other night Beatrice had a dream;
Beatrice: Dad! Dad!! Dad!!!
The father: what!!! Which kind of children are these what happened?
Beatrice: I had a dream.
The father: Ehn ehn.... Go on!
Beatrice: A man wanted to give me Rice and fried chicken but I didnt collect it
The father: Is that all? (Beatrice nodded) Don't worry I'll buy it for you tomorrow.
It was Junior's turn to dream being the eldest and the wisest among the children, he waited for two days before he could have a dream
Junior: Dad! Dad!! Dad!!!
The father: what is it Are you mad! What happened!!?
Junior: shedding croccodile tears I had a dream!
The father: Go on idiot! I have better things to do
Junior: someone wanted to give me a 2015 Toyota Camry and a house key, since you said we shouldn't take anything....The father cuts in...
The father: what!!! And you woke up?? Fool! Go back to your sleep! You're not sharp at all. Me sef I neva ride 2010 model let alone 2015!

1 Like

Jokes Etc / A Father And His Children's Dream by Samfigo1(m): 8:38pm On Jul 05, 2015
A man went to church on Sunday with his family(his wife and three children), after the church service, the pastor beckoned on the father, when the man got to the pastor, he(the pastor) told the man that God asked him to tell him something. The following conversation ensued thus:
Pastor: Bro... Hmmmn...The lord said I should tell you that you should tell your children not take anything in their dreams because it might be disastrous if they do so.
The father: Alright sir! Thank you Sir I really appreciate.
When the man got home he did not hesitate to call his Children... Sandra! Beatrice!! Junior!!!
The children: SIR!!! (they all echoed)
The father: Pastor told me to tell you not take anything from anybody in your dreams Ok?
The children: Alright Sir!
The father: whatever the person wants to give you in your dream tell me I'll buy it for you, is that understood?
The children: Yes sir!
The children went their way. The first night Sandra had a dream, from her sleep she shouted;
Sandra: Dad! Dad!! Dad!!!
The father: what is it What happened??
Sandra: I had a dream! Somebody wanted to give me Ice cream in my dream but I didnt collect it
The father: it's alright! I'll buy it for you tomorrow.
The other night Beatrice had a dream;
Beatrice: Dad! Dad!! Dad!!!
The father: what!!! Which kind of children are these what happened?
Beatrice: I had a dream.
The father: Ehn ehn.... Go on!
Beatrice: A man wanted to give me Rice and fried chicken but I didnt collect it
The father: Is that all? (Beatrice nodded) Don't worry I'll buy it for you tomorrow.
It was Junior's turn to dream being the eldest and the wisest among the children, he waited for two days before he could have a dream
Junior: Dad! Dad!! Dad!!!
The father: what is it Are you mad! What happened!!?
Junior: shedding croccodile tears I had a dream!
The father: Go on idiot! I have better things to do
Junior: someone wanted to give me a 2015 Toyota Camry and a house key, since you said we shouldn't take anything....The father cuts in...
The father: what!!! And you woke up?? Fool! Go back to your sleep! You're not sharp at all. Me sef I neva ride 2010 model let alone 2015!
Politics / Re: Where Are We Going In This Country? Didnt We Tell You? by Samfigo1(m): 6:18pm On Jul 05, 2015
mensdept:


Of course Nigerians don't like to hear the truth, and are frankly cowards. There were other candidates in the last 16 years that could have made a difference but Nigerians are use to military rule and decided to vote/rigg in OBJ and even now Buhari? Even in Saudi Arabia or England, two influential countries for 9ja, the people would have rejected the likes of these baboons but not in Nigeria.

Moslems in the north and some in the west wanted a moslem because they have inferiority complex. The Western leaders in Ibadan/Lagos wanted a Military man because historically they have been able to siphon billions to the detriment of their own people and play off tribal sentiment against the East. The East was and is very disorganized because they have the MOST corrupt people leading them as governors, as their region has over 3 parties competing and dividing them, a then 80 year old Elechi, and THEO ORJI who should have since been shot.

Furthermore, instead of fighting for democracy to improve, Christians are there going to Redeemed and useless churches for jokes, even in Yankee- place where Nigerian students brought attention to military rule to the world in the 1980s and 90s, but today, it is going to Redeemed to get blessings.

Shame

You nailed it! Lol.
Politics / Re: Where Are We Going In This Country? Didnt We Tell You? by Samfigo1(m): 6:13pm On Jul 05, 2015
234GT:
Buhari's followers are blind jare. Imagine one of his followers telling me this afternoon that power situation has improved significantly in Nigeria.
The blind leading the blind lol!
Sure, they will end in the dungeon!
Politics / Where Are We Going In This Country? Didnt We Tell You? by Samfigo1(m): 6:04pm On Jul 05, 2015
After all, election has come and gone, General Mohammadu Buhari has emerged as the president for the next four years. 650 people have been killed within 37days in office through insurgency. By my calculation:
650/37 = 17.57 approx. 18people per day if it should continue like this till the next four years it means we have 365*4*18=26,280 people(God forbid)
excluding those that would die naturally, by accidents, natural disaster and the likes. We told you the following reasons not to vote for Buhari but you dissented;
1.) we said Buhari is an old man
Folks reply; Robert Mugabe is over 90years old forgetting their level of education differ, you even went further to compare him with Nelson Mandela can Buhari undergo what Mandela underwent? A Big No
2. We told you Buhari is a dullard
Folks reply: you called us Tanoids
3.we said Buhari has ruled us before, what did he do?
Folks reply: Were you born then? He was the one that constructed the 3 refineries in Nigeria as if that is what makes a good president.
4. We said Boko Haram disrupted Jonathan's tenure.
Folks reply: The people's general said he would crush BH within 2months
5.we said Jonathan till 2019
Folk reply: The people's General till 2023 Lol
6. We told you Buhari is a liar, He said he has 1million naira in his account but he could afford 27million naira for presidential ticket
Folks reply: He didn't say that, they lent him the 27million naira
7.We told you the devil you know is better than the angel you don't know
Folks reply: you said Buhari is not corrupt!
Now I know some of you will be biting your fingers by now. We have no choice than to wait for 4years unless something inevitable happens.

2 Likes

Politics / Re: Would You Eat A Big Bucket Of Live Worms For N100million? by Samfigo1(m): 9:02pm On Jul 04, 2015
Worms?? Iranu Abasa! I don't need to bring myself that low, I'll have more than that without eating worms can someone say AMEN? Op, if u ate the worms and got the 100million naira and died tomorrow what will your gain be? Don't set ut mind on things below rather set it on things above! Iree o!
Religion / Re: Shocking Facts You Didn't Know About The New International Version Bible by Samfigo1(m): 8:51pm On Jul 04, 2015
NIV? We don't use any other version besides King James Version in my church.
Crime / Re: My Friend Sold Me To Ritualists For N150,000 by Samfigo1(m): 8:26am On Jul 04, 2015
Whenever they say this prayer that the pit your enemy has dug for you he will fall into the pit in your stead, always say a big AMEN.
I rejoice with you bro.

3 Likes

Religion / Re: Pastor To Be Prosecuted For 'Hate Crime' Of Calling Islam 'satanic', 'Heathen'.. by Samfigo1(m): 2:21pm On Jun 23, 2015
Actually he was saying the truth... He should have used wisdom, he shouldn't have mentioned the name of that ''god''.... Anyways God'll deliver him!

1 Like

Jobs/Vacancies / Re: How To Build Confidence When Going For An Interview by Samfigo1(m): 5:55pm On Jun 22, 2015
That smile of a thing I like it so much! I smile a lot! Gud one from u OP
Celebrities / Re: Meet 19-year-old Girl Without Va Gina And Can’t Have S Ex (photos, Video) by Samfigo1(m): 12:54pm On Jun 22, 2015
how we wan take knw now? Show us the sealed or blocked t.w.a.t na
Webmasters / Re: Top 7 Things That Confuse New Nairalanders by Samfigo1(m): 7:39am On Jun 22, 2015
kingcity:
how do u write words in bold ?
u mean bold?
Fashion / Re: How Can I Identify An Authentic Gold Watch? by Samfigo1(m): 11:48am On Jun 20, 2015
talk2tosep:
In most cases the back cover will be gold. Nt stainless and the hallmark must be neatly engraved ( nt written form)with 9k,14k,18k,22k plus the goldsmith name..becareful most watches come as metal core or electroplated..metal core watch are nt easy to know until yu scratch and test with nitric acid.electroplated watches are easy to test by just rubbing on rought surface...
Thanks bro... I'm appreciative!
Fashion / How Can I Identify An Authentic Gold Watch? by Samfigo1(m): 9:53am On Jun 20, 2015
Please Nairalanders, I need ur help as regards buying an original golden watch, how do I differentiate an original one from fake. Some watches may appear golden which are actually fake! Moreso, I need the price range so that i'll not be duped! Thanks!
Jokes Etc / Re: Breaking News! See What Happened To Buses Conveying People From Onitsha To Lagos by Samfigo1(m): 4:49pm On Jun 19, 2015
You gat brain jawe! Unlike dat Jackass called ramdris
Jokes Etc / Re: Breaking News! See What Happened To Buses Conveying People From Onitsha To Lagos by Samfigo1(m): 4:27pm On Jun 19, 2015
Motherfucker! As I dull reach, nobody can stand me in your family! Simple sentence your brain can not interprete...
Jokes Etc / Re: Breaking News! See What Happened To Buses Conveying People From Onitsha To Lagos by Samfigo1(m): 4:17pm On Jun 19, 2015
kelvine:
Then you should have captioned it good news and not breaking news.
Welcome to Lagos.
Is every breaking news a bad news?
Jokes Etc / Breaking News! See What Happened To Buses Conveying People From Onitsha To Lagos by Samfigo1(m): 4:07pm On Jun 19, 2015
BREAKING NEWS!!! The information reaching us now has confirmed that the buses conveying over 100 people from Onitsha to Lagos have landed safely... Don't always expect bad news! Thank God for the journey mercies...

2 Likes

Culture / Re: 10 Common Misconceptions About Ibadan. by Samfigo1(m): 3:36pm On Jun 19, 2015
I can never deny where I come from.... IBADAN my fatherland! I'm proud to be born and bred in Ibadan.... Shout out to all Ibadanians!
Family / Re: Your Best Inherited Quality by Samfigo1(m): 11:54am On Jun 08, 2015
Handbagss how do I get you? I have a message for you!
Education / When Will Guys Stop Being Gullible? ??? by Samfigo1(m): 5:57pm On May 21, 2015
To me it is gullibility, this is ''mugulicity'' of the highest order. Here is my story, I went to a banking hall today, I was on the queue to withdraw with the withdrawal slip, there was a guy behind me and we were moving steadily on the queue, suddenly he saw a lady he knew, he called her and they exchanged pleasantries, after a short while the girl requested money from the guy, the guy brought out two #500 notes and handed a note to her, the lady wanted to collect the two notes but my guy used style to dodge it maybe that was the 'last card' on him, I guess he was thinking he might not meet anything in his account I was forced to look back which I did, Lo and behold I saw the lady holding #500 notes from the way I viewed it, it can't be less than 10notes, I was like why can't she use out of the money she was holding?? The guy now asked why can't she take out of the money she was holding she said she wanted to use it... Chei! So the money in the guy's pocket is for sight seeing?? Kai! Obinrin(females)!!! I hail una o
Family / Re: Judge This Case by Samfigo1(m): 4:44pm On May 06, 2015
Where I think the girl could be wrong is that she could not help her mother-in-law in the kitchen...it's not by force to eat now!! She shld have requested for water instead, maybe that would have given the mother-in-law the impression that girl might be truely satiated!

6 Likes

Family / Re: Judge This Case by Samfigo1(m): 4:44pm On May 06, 2015
Na by FORCE??.

13 Likes

Family / Re: I'm 80% Sure I've Found My Wife by Samfigo1(m): 6:34am On Apr 22, 2015
lofty900:
my brother, I'm not carrying megaphone o, I'm just sharing my thoughts. Of course no one is perfect and I'm not saying I'll definitely marry her. Just that I've seen good qualities in her I'll like my future wife to have that's all.
Lady can be deceitful... All those qualities may be pretence.... Scrutinise well!
Sports / Re: Boxing- Mayweather And Manny Pacquiao Are Expected To Split $300 Millions by Samfigo1(m): 11:30pm On Apr 21, 2015
Xavier9ja:
ya he's d black guy making lot of $$$ from punching people
Can he fight SAMUEL peters
Family / Re: I'm 80% Sure I've Found My Wife by Samfigo1(m): 11:23pm On Apr 21, 2015
Do you need to carry mega phone? It is after you're married for at least a month that you would know if truely she's ur girl/wife.

2 Likes

Sports / Re: Boxing- Mayweather And Manny Pacquiao Are Expected To Split $300 Millions by Samfigo1(m): 11:19pm On Apr 21, 2015
I guess mayweather is the dark guy... His prick wan box ni

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