₦airaland Forum

I dont see Sulaig up for sexuality legend.
Gadamn! that dude had loins of fire! Whatever happened to him?

I wish the OP all the best.
Hopefully they can resolve their differences and reach a compromise without hurting feelings of any of the parties involved. I've made my humble contributions to this thread. Nice rubbing minds with y'all.

^^^^^ The needle is broken once the tattoo is done. You also have to sign that you saw the tattoo artist break and dispose the needle.

jennykadry:
You doubt, but the poster is telling us whats happening, im not going to add words or put words into the posters mouth

When they were dating, she did not complain, when she got married, she did not complain, prolly cos she never get pikin, now that shes got a child she wants to nag, i never for one day told my husband, "oh pls stop speaking yoruba with your friends when im there" if we are toking about compromise here, this is where it fits in, if i tell him to stop speaking yoruba, he def would, but at the same time the relationship and conversation will never be the same again, there will be a gap in the relationship, this pple r his childhood friends, this pple have been speaking this lang right from their sec school days, not to talk of the OP and the mother.

My question is : why is she complaining now? if she doesnt like it , let her talk to her hubby like shes done, but not get the poor woman involved in this, keeping or staying away from this woman, will make her un comfy, shes gonna ask herself what shes done wrong? it will hasten her leaving the house, the house will be like a living nightmare to her, this is a woman that shes got a good rapport with,and all of a sudden this woman avoids her like shes got AIDS, shes happy to come baby sit and cook for u and your hubby, why not just shut up

Err, . . . . .Where did the OP say that?

We still dont know that the mother of the Op does not speak English. Has he clarified? i may have missed it. But like MRbrownJAY pointed out. Most people speak english even if its in a broken form.

When my mum spoke Igbo, I did not wait for my husband to ask her not to so he could understand what was being said. I told her not to myself without him even knowing it!

I know he is trying to learn. I interprete some words to him every now and then. Its not easy trying to learn a new language you know.

I doubt that only a few sentences will have him starting a thread on Nairaland. I doubt it. If its really instinctive then its normal for a few intended sentences to evolve into a full blow conversation.

Kobojunkie:
Well, it's Ok. I am just saying, writing to an illegally installed acting president about another illegally retained officer, just makes me wonder if He understands where the problem stems from. I was just wondering why the same Falana chose to exclude a letter to the president on his illegal installment. . . lol

funny as heck.

In fairness the OP did not say his wife and mother inlaw dont get along. He said his mother likes his wife! So when she wants to be able to understand whats going on around her I dont think its out of spite or insecurities. She probably wants to belong.

jennykadry:
Some people have allowed the westernized world cover their sense of reasoning/judgement[/b], i was about asking the same question, whats the relationship btw a board room and a mans home abeg? we are talking about a mans private life here,his family and someone is toking about board room, [b]who is [b]understanding what?  what has companies and employees hand book got to do with the the poster that needs help in HIS HOUSE[/b]

As long as i remain a nigerian, i dont care if ive become a citizen of some country, but as long as i remain originally from nigeria, English is not my first language, any body that wants to tok about board room should go tell that to the oyibos

This mans wife is just being wicked, sorry poster but thats the truth, you need to sit her down and be firm with her, she just cant bring problems into your house , no way

Geez! Its not a ranting matter.
And yeah, I mentioned board room, social settings, home front, work place and family. I sure did to emphasize that no matter where you are someone is bound to feel left out when they dont understand what is going on around them. Is it so far fetched?  
If the point eluded you, sorry you couldnt make the connection! Regardless of where you are, you should try not speak languages others dont understand. It may be instinctive to you but at least try to interprete or throw in some English or something. you know why? Because someone will come on nairaland and ask for advice for the tension this matter is causing in his house.  If it wasnt causing him family problems and stress  he wouldnt be here. Simple.

Apparently from the train of thoughts here and from opinions of some who insist on speaking what they want when they want (sure its your right)  in a few years there will be many more threads of 'TENSION IN MY HOUSE' started by many more men.
we could have been spared this trivial matter if a mutual language had been spoken.

Like I said before I have been there. I have sat through people jabbering away in an unknown language and just stared both in the home front and work front.Its not fun.  Im not talking of them doing it sometimes, Im talking of all the time. It is instinctive for them. Very uncomfortable for me. I knew they were not talking about me or plotting to kill me or anything. But after hours of their instinct I would rather be some place else doing more productive stuff.    

Funny enough, my mum was around years ago to help with my new baby. She would often speak Igbo to me in the house.  I told her my friends who were always around (They were Yoruba) did dont understand what she was saying . She would laugh, apologize and switch back to English. Same with my husband. She tries not to speak Igbo to me when he's around and I appreciate. It was never a big deal. This issue is one of compromise. If you want to stoke the fires of the tension, then dont compromise.

What are the alternatives to using cooking gas? Electricity? In Nigeria? Goodluck to you.
I dont think that firewood is practical in this modern day.

Do you know how many women have paid their own brideprice to save face?
The family greedily divides the spoils not knowing it came from their daughter's pocket.

I do not believe in the whole bride price thing. . . . . Aside from the entertainment and refreshments that should be provided on that day.

jennykadry:
There is no ground for argument here

The poster clearly stated that the mother asks simple questions like "What will you eat for dinner" or whatever, for heavens sake that shouldnt be a problem, this woman should have alteast learnta tiny bit of her hubbys lang even if its a word

Enough of blaming outsiders for marital problems, sometimes the insiders are the reason for this problem and if his wife is not careful, she is going to lose the relationship she has with her mother inlaw and when she wants to get it back, ti will be too late

Some Women are praying for God to take the lives of their mother inlaw, and this one is here, not appreciating what God has done for her

Yeah right.
Because of only one sentence there is tension? Often discussing or trying to decide what to eat is a whole conversation.
Plus if she speaks that language while asking what he'll eat, she'll probably use that language to ask about other things.

I dont see why people cant understand the simple social courtesies involved here.

Be it in the office setting, home front or board room, it is understood that you dont speak languages that other people around dont understand. Usually its an unspoken rule. Some companies go as far as having it in their employee hand book. It is for a reason, believe it or not. Put yourself in the shoes of the person who doesnt understand the language. You could be in the company of these people for 24 hours or the greater part of your day and not understand a single word that is said. If that is not akward I dont know what is! Its not simply because you think they are talking about you. They could be joking and laughing their heads off and you would just sit there playing with your nails completely lost not even able to enjoy the jokes. I dont see why anyone would have a problem riverting to a mutual language. It really should be instinctive. When you see the other person looking lost why would you not want to include them in the conversations? I guess you cant force your ethiquette on people.  

What would end up happening is that when they start speaking their language after some time she'll probably end you going to the other room to watch some Tv that she actually understands.   . Next thing you hear is the patronising comments like " Ah, ah our wife dont you like sitting with us"?. "Why are you always running"?  She cant win in this situation. Ive been there before.

^^^^ could you kindly leave prayer out of this? Thanks.

not much

Ayemokhia:
A police Corporal, Adeola who was serving at the Alade Police Division, Somolu, Lagos has been remanded at Kirikiri Maximum Security prison for alleged despoil.

The policeman, who was yesterday arraigned before an Ikeja magistrate’s court, was accused of unlawfully having carnal knowledge of a 16 year-old girl (name withheld) at Somolu.

He pleaded not guilty to the charge brought against him.

However, the magistrate ruled that he should be remanded in prison custody until the next hearing.

P.M.NEWS gathered that Corporal Adeola last Wednesday arrested three people, two men and the girl whom he locked up in the female cell.

It was alleged that around 2. a.m on Thursday, the policeman, also called ‘Ade’, went into the cell and forcefully had intimacy with Bose who was locked alone in the female cell.

The girl was said to have reported the incident to her family who immediately swung into action by arresting the randy policeman and he was subsequently charged to court.

The victim, who is said to be the daughter of an Oodua Peoples’ Congress (OPC) chief in Somolu in Somolu narrated that she was shocked when the policeman sneaked into the female cell where she was the only occupant and despoiled her.

The father of the girl has vowed to fight the case to its logical conclusion.

Do you only get justice in nigeria if your Father is 'someone'?

They cannot start screening every one or company that wants to place an ad. Sometimes simple common sense goes a long way.

People, Ekwensu does exist.
I just dont blame him for everything.

You cant escape the IRS. You must vomit every penny owed.

people still fall for this?

Honey , a company will give you a job and train you. Not you paying for your own training and then place you. Sorry.

coolier:
What? that is insulting the mum!. English is not the mum's language so why should she start to speak English in the house especially to her own son? They're married with two children, long enough for his wife to have started picking her husband's native language. I hope she's not going to ask her husband not to speak Ibo to his kids too!

Insulting? Have you already assumed that the mother doesnt speak any English?

They make a decent living. You dont have to work at night. It reduces your chances of getting mugged.

No.

My husband would put on the baby's diaper wrong way around. It was like rocket science to him. I could see he was trying.

It is not by force.

chamotex:
From my own experience I think it's all women . . . usually the left [i]b[/i]oobies are bigger.
Same with the [i]n[/i]ipples

b*reast scientist. 

Nigerians and staph. . . . . . . . . .
No matter what ails you, the doctors will say its staph. Kilode?