₦airaland Forum

Goldrosewine:
I guess you are describing what your mom did sha

This. He never for once insulted your mom. Why is it so easy for women today to haul insults at men's mom when something is directed at them. Smh. You're no different. He didn't even direct an insult at you. But you're very quick to insult his mom. I pity men that get easily carried away by looks. Suffer no go tire to be their companion.

Daniluv1:
Not everyone can be as lucky as you bro enjoy it while it lasts bro

Very important. Love how you said it. While it lasts.

Mariangeles:
Without "burden", there's no sense of purpose.
So, what are you living for?

wow. Just wow. Lmao. Men must have sense by force.

blaise26abj:
I join you to laugh. Married women cheat more or at least equally with married men, know this and know peace.

bro. Lmao.

Axis313:
She is 100% correct,in Islam,it is the husband's duty to provide for the household.
No matter how rich the wife is, it is not compulsory for her to provide but she can support the household.

Al rijal qawwamun ala nisa" (الرِّجَالُ قَوَّٰمُونَ عَلَى ٱلنِّسَآءِ) is a well-known phrase from the 34th verse of Surah An-Nisa in the Quran (4:34). It translates to: "Men are the protectors and maintainers of women".The verse outlines the foundational roles and responsibilities within a marriage in Islam.
Its core concepts are:
Maintenance and Protection: The verse states that men are designated as caretakers because God has given them strengths to excel over others, and because they are required to spend their wealth to provide for and protect their families.

Reciprocal Rights: Scholars emphasize that this role implies heavy responsibilities rather than absolute authority. Men are required to ensure the financial security, physical safety, and overall well-being of their families.

such flawed doctrine. Doesn't even apply to what the current reality is. Islam needs to be worked on. All these archaic practices should be modified. No wonder.

Diamond098454:
It's easy for women to forgive but very hard for men. Women hardly cheat

women hardly cheat lol



Rotflmao

pappilo:
I am in a similar position but my plan is not to take it to the grave. I recently survived stage 3 cancer but it looks like its come back and that is usually terminal.

I dont have a wife as I got divorced about 7 years ago but I have a girlfriend. I wont give her my password. She will get my spousal pension as she stood by me during my initial diagnosis. My password and control of my bank accounts and assets will be given to my son (will be 19 years soon) when it has become clear that my time left is short and I still have the strength.

Although I will have to do some cleaning up of my phone before that happens.

I'm sorry for your diagnosis sir. I hope you get healed. Btw have you tried herbs?

Caaz:
I know my husbands password to his phones....down to all his Arm cards. ...cuz I handle 89% of all his monitary transactions.
He knows mine.




I guess the relationship btw couples matters a lot down to understanding.

He's very comfy and free operating my phone's too viz a viz

as it should be. But Gen Z women have turned relationship into another thing. I have given up on having anything serious with these hell spawns. Good evening Caesar Caaz. How have you been!

helinues:
While the opposition are sad as there won't be anything to use as vindication.

The we are finished people

guy go use shame siddon one place. Forget about the opposition for once. Ask any neutral Nigerian if your lord and saviour is doing well. Try and feel their pulse. Everything isn't politics your god is clueless. He should resign and let someone competent take over.

PulaPower:
You people claiming opposition are just not brilliant at all. Same lame empty story. How’s he not bothered? Nah by words dem go recover those kids? The kids you're referring to would soon gain freedom, no be by making noise..

That being said, are you not happy that states are no longer borrowing to pay salaries? I won’t be surprised if you’re sad that states are no longer paying salaries, but that’s your own personal problem..

All of una propaganda towards tinubu never worked out till date. Why? Cuz you people are just empty. Una go try taya and nah still failure go end ham!

pray hard make Nigeria no happen to you. When it does, you'll develop sense by force. Enjoy

yarimo:
Nigerians are happy to have TINUBU as president

one day the evil that you keep supporting would swallow you and your loved ones. My only concern is that I hope you'll be able to come here and still publicly support him. Spits.

Mpanyi:
You're disrespectful to the blind. Obviously you are not intelligent

na these small small margins most guys dey always miss with women. I didn't even take the time to go through all of her posts sef. But whatever works for her

MisterKennedy:
I know you said no guy should send you any unsolicited messages, but I honestly love your honesty. You really took out time to explain all the features you want and admire in a man... That's cool... My curiosity drove me to check out your profile and I can tell that, not only are you a very beautiful woman, you are also a very intelligent woman. And I see it in the way you chat too. Your flow of chat and sentence structure and grammar is so on point and off the charts. If wishes were horses right now, I'd love to ask you for your number so that we could be communicating off Nairaland. You are the kind of lady I honestly want to make my friend. Would you please give me your number? Or can I give you mine instead please?

ChristCee:
I brought in the only thing people like you would understand. Yo mama

bro you need psychiatric treatment.

Goldrosewine:
No one in this world is perfect. No one is an ideal machine. And that's what makes us human and unique💯💯🔥

Not exactly the response I was anticipating, but I'll take it. Makes plenty sense. In other words, you could be with a man that doesn't have all the features listed by you.

Goldrosewine:
I am indifferent about complexion, I have no preference.

All right. I check all boxes but I'm not a public speaker though

ghettochild:
WhatsApp me send you the Facebook link of this testimonies

God bless you man. I'll text you now.

ChristCee:
Imagine they talk about your mom's jugs like this

the girl na your mama?

ChristCee:
Imagine they talk about your mom's jugs like this

yo go Sabi do eye service. The way I dey see you

ChristCee:
Imagine they talk about your mom's jugs like this

this one cries more than the bereaved.

Goldrosewine:
This does not imply sexual interests, abeg o just bored today on this holiday and I have decided to rant here, since I saw a similar post recently about a guy saying confidence is what a lady cannot resist in a man. I won't appreciate any unsolicited messages🙏

Dentition: Gap teeth (you know what I mean, especially a small one right between the central incisors) or just between the lateral incisor and canine)

Thick wrist (not fats deposit, just wrists with a wide circumference)

Minimal or no bodily hairs. Yeah a lot will hate me for this, just my opinion which may change or not. But those beards, chest or armpit hairs? Taah!

Height. However you must not be too tall. I am 5:9 so anything from 5:6 to 5:11 is perfect.

Modesty and awesomeness (not extreme masculinity) I am not a feminist abeg. I like guys that are gentle, pull the chair for you at the restaurant, hold an umbrella for you, hold the door open for you, just being a gentleman. Absolute modesty and simple too. Not a show off dude haha!

Healthy lifestyle. There is nothing I dislike more than a guy who smokes or drinks or do both. I don't just dislike them, I h-word them. Take your good health seriously guys, go for rehab if you need to.

Small inner circle. Guys with few or no friends. The introvert who enjoys his own company.

Respectful. The guy that still prostrate to greet his dad at 30 years, still run errands for his mom at 35 (not necessarily because he is living with them, but maybe sometimes when he visits or when they give him an emergency call) that level of respect is the norm for every omoluabi.

Not bald. As much as I dislike body hairs, e no reach head abeg🤣

Belly fat. (Not pot belly) I love belly fat in a man, especially the type that gives him the wealthy boy vibe when he's in a native. I don't know but in Benin republic, I once saw this muscular, six pack guy that bullied people and he had an altercation with this gentle guy who looks ordinary, he even had a fatty belly. Against what people thought, it was the muscular guy that needed saving o, see blue black beating. Lol. It kind of left an impression on me.

Speech intelligence. Even if you no know book, just have good oratory skills and be eloquent. I would like to see my man on a podium speaking with great eloquence while I sit in the crowd or assembly just admiring him and looking at how other ladies are admiring him😊🥰🥰🥰 aiish

Phobia. Scared of snakes or rats or spiders or cocroaches lol even my cousin would tell me I will never find this trait in a Nigerian man. But I am not scared of those things. So I would really like a guy that has such fears, that way I would be able to do something for him and it would make me feel good🤦🙈 it's hard to explain honestly.🥲🥲


Ambitious. he dreams big, not jealous of success, just envying it and ambitious to reach the top too.

Laughs a lot. That would be golden!

He cries. Like, weep Take this from me. If you ever express your sadness in tears while in your girl's arm, it does something to her heart... she'd start clutching to you so hard. Don't be manly all the time. Sometimes, just let the feelings flow. Life is already hard for everyone, talkless a man.🥺 I feel u guys.

Straight legs No vex but I dislike wobbly legs... and many guys have come to have a sort of disfigured legs due to bad walking posture, trying to copy one silly trend or so, etc.

Gentle with kids and pets That would be another golden trait!

Extremely decent with words and actions when in public The way he eats, talks, interact, just everything. Especially in Nigeria where people judge you by your countenance and how you 'carry' yourself.

You know the sort of guys that gleefully talk about women's body parts in public? That's so uncouth and all ladies detest such.

Gold🌹🍷

You like dark skinned dudes?

ghettochild:
Check a veterinary pharmacy or normal pharmacy

thanks bro.

Stephen0mozzy:
For one, game is about recognizing a lost cause once you see one.

From the conversation OP showed us, he's doing too much talking, while the girl just nitpicks one out of his message to interrogate him, then op goes on a new rant.

Her: You are old

Me: Haha... That's the icing on the cake.

Her: How?

Me: For a man, with age comes experience - that's experience in knowing how to care for you, make you feel loved, and show you pleasure like you've never felt.

Her: You should be married

Me: Have you wondered why I'm spending so muxh time talking with you? Achalugo, I will marry you.

Her: You are not odogwu, you don't have money (Age Topic has changed)

Or

Her: Never o
Me: Never say never 😏

Or

Her: (She blocks me)
Me: (On to the next one)

lol. Nice one. I picked one or two from the conversation below. Thanks.

Stephen0mozzy:
I just dey read your own part of the chat, and shame just dey catch me for you. Your own 31yrs get as e be o.

So you dey try convince a 20yr old girl about how you're not old, and you dey talk about how she wan enter menopause? Dey talk how you go fit marry and handle woman when you dey 45yrs?

Wherever you for learn your own toasting from eh, tell them make dem refund your money.

She blocked you because you no sabi game - not age difference.

what would have been your response to her "old" message? I'd like to know how you plan to game her. Cause It would have been lights out for me. No further discussions from my end. I'll tell her no issue.

oarowosola:
Honestly, you guys are funny as hell. Some of the roasts had me laughing, some were annoying, but overall I enjoyed reading the comments.

But one thing I need people to understand is this, I didn’t come here because I was looking for relationship advice. At the point I made that first post, my mind was already made up. I was already mentally done with the relationship long before I even typed anything.

The reason I shared the story was mostly because I was exhausted mentally, and I also wanted people to see how extreme certain situations can get in relationships. Sometimes people think you’re exaggerating until you start explaining the details.

Truth be told, this breakup didn’t happen overnight.

I had already been thinking about ending things for a very long time. The only thing holding me back was the fact that she is actually an amazing person in some ways. She has a soft heart, and I knew breaking up with her was going to hurt her deeply, so I kept trying to find the best possible way to do it without completely destroying her emotionally.

But the events of that final weekend just pushed me over the edge.

The way she left my kitchen after staying over, combined with everything that happened the night before, was what finally made me snap internally. It wasn’t that I suddenly realized all the issues that day. No. Those things had been building up in my mind for months.

Before I eventually sent the breakup message, I had already started emotionally withdrawing from the relationship. I stopped calling as much, stopped texting often, and stopped engaging the way I used to. She noticed it too. She kept asking what was wrong, and I would just say I’m fine, even though she knew something was clearly off.

Eventually I realized I couldn’t keep dragging it out forever. I didn’t want to keep pretending while mentally checking out. So I finally sent her a message telling her I was no longer interested in continuing the relationship.

At first, she was shocked.

She kept asking how someone could end a relationship of over a year through text without explanation. She asked if there was another person involved. She begged me not to ignore her. She said she was trying to stay calm because she was outside in public.

Honestly, reading those messages affected me because despite everything, I’m still human. I’m not heartless.

So instead of completely shutting her out, I told her we could talk later because I was busy with work at that moment.

Later that night, I finally picked up her call.

And for the first time, I explained everything fully.

I explained how draining the relationship had become for me mentally. I explained how uncomfortable I constantly felt because of the difference in our lifestyles, hygiene, responsibilities, communication patterns, effort, and overall approach to life.

I explained the incidents that stayed in my head for months, the constant untidiness, the dirty environments, the financial imbalance, the times I felt taken for granted, the moments I cleaned her entire house just to prove that basic cleanliness was not impossible.

And no, cleaning her house was never a sign of weakness or simping to me.

I did it because I loved her.

I genuinely believed maybe if I showed her how simple it was to maintain a clean environment, things would improve. That was all. But instead, things kept repeating themselves over and over again.

I also explained how frustrating it felt to constantly give financially, emotionally, and physically while feeling like the same level of thoughtfulness wasn’t being returned consistently.

By the end of the call, she broke down crying and started apologizing repeatedly. She begged me to give her another chance. She promised she would change. She promised she would work on herself and become better.

And honestly… I softened.

Maybe because deep down, despite everything, I still cared about her.

So I gave her another chance, but I made myself very clear.

I told her this wasn’t about pretending for one week or acting differently temporarily because she got called out. I told her real change has to become natural. Cleanliness, responsibility, effort, and self awareness cannot be something you perform temporarily just to save a relationship.

I told her:

“Please change for yourself, for your future kids, and for me too. Don’t just act differently now and later return to old habits. Let it become part of you naturally.

As a lady, I honestly expected you to even be correcting me on certain things, not the other way around. I’m putting a lot on the line emotionally, and I don’t want to regret my decisions later in life.

I’m not saying this like I’m doing you a favor. There are billions of men better than me, just like there are women better than you. Nobody is irreplaceable. But while two people are trying to build something meaningful together, both people should be actively working on themselves.

You are free to call out my own flaws too because I’m not a perfect human being. Relationships are supposed to be about growth, accountability, and complementing each other. The moment two people stop growing and start merely tolerating bad patterns, the relationship slowly becomes exhausting instead of peaceful.”


So yeah… that’s the full update.

Some people roasted me in the first post. Some understood me immediately. Some thought I was overreacting. Some thought I was being too soft.

But at the end of the day, nobody truly understands how emotionally draining a relationship can become until they experience living inside that reality themselves.

better watch your six. You may live to regret this .

Sonofgod1990:
EPL cup is very common. Arsenal should try and carry champions League cup for crying out loud 📢📢📢📢

this guy na fool😂😂

Diamond098454:
That gender can do anything for soft skin

hmmmm hmmm hmmm not all of us