₦airaland Forum

FortuneTeller:
I am sensing a lot of activity between you and lady39.

lol! Please I need to understand that phrase "lot of activity"

You know me to be blunt and down to earth.
I have to state this openly so that people will not start making conclusions.

I can't say there is lot of activity between me and anyone who is too careful to interact with me ..

Lady39 and myself are online friends and the only form of communication at the moment is email hence I can't call that lots of activity.

Yes she seems to be a wonderful lady but then one can never be sure if she is human cos robots can send emails these days and anyone can put up any pics.

I have wonderful nairaland female friends and I mean well groomed,decent elegant and sophisticated ladies who I chat with and also communicate with without fear,suspicion or prejudice and that is my standard for a purposeful friendship regardless of your status or nationality.

Except im dating the lady,the fact that a lady friend of mine resides in the states,or any other advanced country will not make me treat her any different from my lady friend in ikire village of Osun state and if I can do regular calls with a lady friend next door then why can't I do same with a lady friend that stays in the states or any other country outside Nigeria?

If you know my full names,Facebook ID telephone number...why on earth can't I know yours?
if a lady is too careful to know me then of what use is the friendship?

So conclusively I won't blame her so much but for the crazy guys that have given the good Nigerian guys bad image but nevertheless,i am a thorough breed Nigerian guy and I'm proud of who I am.

abike12:
This makes a lot of sense and thanks for sharing. These days people spend courtship having sex and feeding each other lies. Due diligence will put you in a better position to make an informed decision. It's not by force to marry someone with from certain type of background or with baggage, and instead of sitting around to let them romance you and tell lies you're better off going to find these things out yourself. The only problem is for people outside the country, how do we go about verifying the many tales that Nigerian men tell us here? Some people's oriki should be omo oniro lati iya oniro to loyun fun baba oniro. Tufia!

Thanks sis.

You made a valid point I must say.
As regards someone in abroad in an affair with someone in Nigeria I guess one needs to be more cautious.

But then one can still do a little due diligence based in the info you have.

Then watch out for red flags by asking yourself some deep questions like...does he ask for money? why does he want to be with you? are there no decent ladies in Nigeria? Can you video chat with him and his family members?

Ask for his Facebook Twitter or any social media ID and check his records pics and so on...if you are OK then go to step two...

No matter how distant you are at least you should have someone in Nigeria you can trust a little...let this person find out certain things about this guy based on the info he provides...

The last line of action is taking the risk by filing a k1 visa which is fiance visa or intending to marry ....if that scales through then you two can be together in your country for like 6months to court each other..if he misbehaves just move on..at least you are not married to him but if he proves to be genuine...you marry him and hope for the best.

My submission.....some will see it as stressful doing due diligence but remember that marriage is a veery big deal

Amelian:
Abeg keep your advice.. It's not needed.
I didn't even ask for it

Use it for yourself

Am good 2 go where I am.


So don't worry about me

Ok?

In a cultured world where i belong, a proper cultured and well mannered lady would respond by writing something more dignifying and not this ..
A guy who does due diligence on you would know with this single comment that you are very saucy,arrogant and uncultured..please try and adjust. Your response to that innocuous post is totally sarcastic and unwarranted.


I guess im done with you lady..whatever rocks your boat.

Good night.

carmag:
with my experience so far in life couple getting married without a courtship is as good as gambling the chances of having a blissful married life is 50 50

This is my point bro..there is a stage you gget to and the sound of courtship is like a cacophony to your hears.

As far as im concerned, the lady i will marry will be surprised at the speed it will take. I don't give a hue about courtship and if i must court you maybe for the fun of it.

Real men know what they want.

1.If you are pleasing to my eyes then you have gotten me 70%
2.If i make my findings and i discover you are good enough for me than i marry you..simple.

Why waste time sexing each other in the name of courtship? why do i have to waste my time observing what could be pure pretense?

If you meet someone, go near those that know him,his neighbors,colleagues,friends.family members,ex if possible... no matter how they all try to hide him i believe you might just have a very clear picture of who he or she is and that will make you more prepared.

This is marriage we are talking about and not just mare fling.

Amelian:
Am not talking of boyfriend and girlfriend either.


Am talking of a relationship or intent that leads to marriage .

My humble advice..no matter how sweet talking a guy may be, no matter how smooth he may appear and no matter how unassuming you may portray him to be...please and pplleeaasseee...do some under ground investigations..this is about your life, your happiness and your emotions...

Some guys are Gold diggers but you will hardly know and some guys are real snakes but they wil appear like an angel until you realize its too late.

Before you start courting any man at all or before you allow your emotions to get the best of you..please do your due diligence by yourself and you will be sure to discover the real him and only then can you truly make up your mind if you still want to go on.

kazeemolami:
The way you painted due diligence here makes it looks easy but on this century it is easier said than done. Thankfully you cited our parents as example. Then due diligence was best but now courtship is best. Things have changed.

I made it quite clear that guys willmostly not give a bleep about due diligence cos they are rarely at the recieving end.

But when a lady refutes due diligence for courtshup then i just wish such lady luck.

How manty ladies have gotten pregnant for a married man? How many ladies have ended up with cultists? ritualists? Armed robbers.yahoo boys without having a single clue?

Due diligence is very easy if you want to do it but people just get carried away by the initial rush of desire a.k.a initial gragra and they throw caution to the wind and just a little digging,they would have saved themselves future headache but they depend on courtship which could be faked

How many guys have married oloshos just to know after marriage? How many guys have been sent to their early grave just because they are having affair with a married lady who lied to them she is soo single?

Amelian:
You are the one twisting it

What does a 21year old girl know about due diligence? Even about courtship? What do ladies in 20 or early 20s know.

U are talking blinding.. U are not seeing the bigger picture..
Pls I take God beg u.. No need arguing with me tonight.. Just focus on your topic and try convince other to accept your due diligence..

Did you skip that part that says :PURPOSEFUL UNION?"

I am not writing about flings or affairs that has no real intent..what on earth does a guy who just wants to bleep a lady and move on has to do with due diligence and what concerns a lady who knows she is just playing around with due diligence?

I am referring to union between two responsible adults who have serious intent and not just any boyfriend girlfriend union

carmag:
with my experience so far in life couple getting married without a courtship is as good as gambling the chances of having a blissful married life is 50 50

Lol! and in my over 4 decades of life I can tell you that courtship is a facade...Due diligence must be paramount and yes people do change but you will at least know the person to an extent and then you start the courtship just to be sure.

My point is that courtship is not a good template cos people can pretend for years but you can't change your past.

Amelian:
I don jam in the past with due diligence

And those periods were the worst period of my life. The worst ever!

In my early twenties, my parents got me engaged to a psychopath. They did their due diligence. His family is well known and royal. Likewose ours too. Whether am. In love or not was irrelevant. When my ex fiance saw me he liked me and fast forward the engagement. Everybody was happy.. What perfect families coming together as one wow! Mum was beaming with smiles, very soon her daughter will get married. 6 months before the wedding proper .. Things started to onfold, ugly things from the groom started to unfold right in front of my eyes. He had series of dark sides no one knew about. Except his dad and mum who knew.. And to the outside world, he's a great catch , while I was virgin, untouched like a prize to the groom family.

My dear lemme not talk much but at the die moment of the wedding . I ran away.. Far far away ..or else two corpses would have gone to. Meet Baba God that day.

He usually keeps a shotgun in his house, known only by me and him and he taught me how to shoot. So invariably it's either he kills me or I kill him.. But definitely I ain't marry that sadistic psychopath!.

So trust me Toks2008 I know what am saying.

Why are you all twisting this write up? who leaves the parent to do due diligence these days? of course you can do it yourself...

If I meet a lady who is too secretive I just run as far as I can cos that is a red flag.

These days it is very easy to do due diligence rather than waste your time with courtship which can be full or pretense no matter the number of years.

Some married men date a single lady and lie they are single and just a little due diligence would have revealed the secret buy the lady would rather believe him and allow initial gragra to cloud her sense of reasoning and at the end she will start crying over what a he could have easily avoided.

Please you guys should stop bringing parents to present day due diligence.

carmag:
so because in your other thread ladies attacked you for posting a thread that criticises women you decided to come up with this and insisting it favours women

well, in Catholic Churches couple are asked before wedding how long they've dated to ascertain if they would be able to tolerate each other and that have gone a long way in reducing divorce cases amongst catholics

Like seriously! because I was attacked? please say something else..do I look as if I care?

If you check very well this thread was written before that thread you are referring to just that the mods choose which one comes to fpage before another.

And yes it does favour ladies more because they need to be more careful.

Amelian:
Choose due diligence at your own peril.

Courtship is by far better.. If u are smart u will know what u are getting into within a month! No matter how cunning or amiable your spouse may be.

SMH! pray not to jam.

chronique:
I prefer due deligence. I like to know what I'm getting into, so I don't end up wasting my time.

My point exactly...there is a certain age you get to that courtship becomes a total waste of time and if it must happen it should not be more than few months.

Courtship is no guaranty of a good union cos people can pretend a lot but you can't be too smart to hide the real you from some friends,Co workers,family members or colleagues which is why due diligence us far more effective than the facade called courtship.

If you like court for a million years...people can still pretend but due diligence of just a month will give you a better picture of that person.

Cessa0:
exactly! This is d kind of vision guyz shud have... nt necessarily driving a napep, u cn decide to pick up sth else.. but no oo.. Everybody wnts to buy Voltron at once! They feel intimidated once any car drives by dem.. y'all shud wake up abeg nd stp singing 'no jobs, no jobs'... There r jobs everywhere ..get urself busy!

Kudos to u man! i wish pple will learn frm ds.

OK we have heard..now to my question.

Can you date a Keke napep Rider?

liljaydee:
Am in my late 20s, got married last year, am tired and don't really know what to do, my pregnant wife always ask for sex every night. Am really tired of it , please what should I do ?

Please reasonable advise .......

Give it to her...

Different ladies have different wild needs during pregnancy..some who hate a taste of alcohols could drink bottles of gin...some love to eat wild stuffs...some will only eat left over food...some can only sleep on the floor and so on...I guess this is the case with your wife....daily sex so please don't deny her.

Ishilove:
This is incorrect. Pidgin English, or broken English is not peculiar to Nigeria but to countries whose lingua franca is the English language. It is simplified or broken down and flavoured with indigenous languages and used as a medium of communication. There are various brands of Pidgin English, and the one spoken in Nigeria is 'Nigerian pidgin'.

Read more here: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pidgin

I see..I had always believed it's just a Nigeria thing o.

Thanks for the info

Catalin:
Money can't buy genuine love I tell you but it can buy pretentious love.

LOBATAN!

But the problem is that the lady is ready to pretend to the extent of having babies for the guy and remaining with him as long as that money is there.

It's a crazy world where no one give a bleep about you except the person sent by GOD to you

When I look back at my life sometimes I just want to cry and cry but when I begin to count my blessings I just say TO GOD BE THE GLORY

At a tender age of 26 I was a millionaire affecting my generation positively and bankers were my friends...people came close and I was having the best times of my life. I became a CEO at that age setting up cyber cafes in a period where it was still a hit deal in Nigeria but on the 11th of Nov 2001 a day I will never forget fate had its way and I had an auto crash which changed my life and for months I recuperated at home...spent every dime just to regain my normal self then I saw the other side of life I will cry like a baby because no one was there for me. .

The bank I put in good money turned their back on me and could not give me a loan as small as 100k.... forgetting that thus is the same guy that deposits good money.

The church I belong to and gave cheerfully never came to my aide..I became a shadow of myself and I almost died of hunger

I will drink water from morning till night and when people see me they see a smiling face but inside I was bleak...

I remember calling a food hawker one day and I begged her to sell credit for me just once everyday hoping to give her money anytime I have and all these while I was still nursing a nerve damage ....a case of double tragedy

I had to take the bulls by the horns and do what I got to do . I found a way to repair my car and I started a cab business just to get by until I was able to do something more worthwhile.

Many times I have fallen and many times I have risen back to my feet...unfortunately we live in Nigeria where we have to struggle our way up against all odds that try to pull us down.

That is why when I see some reckless display of wealth by some people..I just smh...

If you are reading this and you are a graduate with no one to help...don't quit looking for a job BUT DON'T WAIT UNTIL YOU GET A JOB...go out there and do what you have to do...be legit..don't do scams ....pray to GOD and GOD will surely hear your prayer...don't be deceived. .no one truly cares except that special person sent by GOD to you....DON'T QUIT

generaliy:
LOL.

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GOD will bless your hustle in Jesus name.

mrjojo:
This is not right Bros, Yoruba demon doesn't mean a demon from the Yoruba tribe, it an urban saying meaning a sophisticated "player"(chronic heart breaker) who happens to be Yoruba by tribe. And there is no hausa or igbo demon as of now

I'm Yoruba and I gave the meaning in the most realistic manner...

I have never heard that urban word before tho

Lady39:
Now I (Lady39) have a glimpse of what it feels like....true story.
"I'm sorry Lord."
Now I know how it feels to only be wanted for what one can "do" rather than who one "is".
"I'm sorry Lord."
Now I know that people know how to "fake it until they make it" (having ulterior motives) rather than being "authentic" & taking time to know someone & truly develop a relationship with him/her.
What an awful thing to do to someone...

"I'm sorry Lord." "Is this how I've been treating you?" "Please forgive me."
It took an object lesson for me (Lady39) to see..& I'm still learning..

Most humans are guilty of this. If you ask an average human why he or she loves God you will be certain to hear things like. .because he loves me,because he is almighty..because he is awesome and rarely will you hear "because I just chose to love him"

This is why human love will forever be conditional.

Now we also tend to fake it but it takes a real person who is truly sincere to bring his or motive to the open...

When we give we expect to receive good measure,press down shaken together...there is always an ulterior motive but as long as it is brought to the open and not hidden, it becomes a sincere one.But when you fake it by hiding the real motive then it becomes a sinister move just like many in churches who claim they love God by giving but in actual fact..they give only because they expect something back from God.

To know God is to go close to him...no one knows God from afar.

Just as humans...you do not know another except you get close,until you communicate deeply without fear and secrecy. In like manner no one can know God unless you go close to him and you destroy every for of prejudice about his sovereignty and have the determination to really know him in truth ...I guess you may never know GOD for who he is.

We all must work on ourselves. .GOD HELP US

Lady39:
Hi folks,
Please forgive me if this is in the wrong section cause I don't know where it fits.

Not knowing the Igbo language (and other tribal languages) unfortunately has put me at a disadvantage on this website but I'm trying to learn. I don't know which words are from which tribe or if some of the words are just general words used by all Nigerians. What are the meaning of the following words that I see often on threads & posts:

1). Abeg
2). Oga
3). Abi
4). Wahala
5). I see the words "na" before a word
6). Koboko

Also I've seen the words "Yoruba Demon" a lot and am wondering what specifically that means?
I asked the veteran, expert Nairaland relationship counselor Sir Toks2008, but he refused to tell me this one. I want to be aware so I can identify one if needs be....Will someone help me out please? I'm trying to learn.
Thanks

On the contrary I promised to tell you even more but I forgot to respond to this particular one.

You need to be in constant verbal communication with one who understands this language to learn more in a faster way.

Abeg is a pidgin word for please..pidgin English is a special type of English peculiar to Nigeria.

Oga could mean many things both in pidgin and in Yoruba or even other languages

Oga could mean boss in pidgin
Oga also means Camellion in Yoruba
Oga is also a type of sign word in Yoruba.

Abi is just a simple pidgin word of attestation to the truth...like reaffirming a stance.

Wahala is a Yoruba word which also doubles as a pidgin word for trouble.

Na or nah is also pidgin like saying it's or he is or she is,you are...I could say you are the finest or Na you be the fiinest.

Koboko is generally a whip but could be used interchangeably for many things and in some contexts it is used to describe the pnis..

Yoruba demon means demon of Yoruba tribe or southwest part of Nigeria

Hausa demon means demon of Hausa or Nothern part

Igbo Demon means demon from the eastern part of Nigera

Now you can see why I opined that you need verbal communication to understand all these and many more as it is quite tasking explaining in written form.

I hope I have finally answered.

And yet another one lalasticlala

Another insightful one lalasticlala

Kob:
That a lady is single at 40 has nothing to do with spiritual or psychic problems!

I agree...some are just unfortunate.

pocohantas:
This thread is a remix of this https://www.nairaland.com/3290032/13-hypocrisies-idiosyncrasies-polygamy

When you exhaust talking about women matter, maybe you'll finally talk a bit about career and investments.

There are other good writers in that section...for me I love politics,Religion and romance. ..by the way this is no remix cos the thread you pasted is far broader.

Yewandequeen:
Which can you create sagged or not its

Moreover the size determines if will still be firm or not and you can't expect the size of hers to still be firm up without coming down a little.

Dont get me wrong please..every lady is uniquely beautiful. Different guys have different taste and there are some guys that love very big boobs no matter how saggy.

By the way i hope you are not getting that saggy word twisted...i must have used the wrong word.

A busty lady must have a droppy boobs which is not the same as flat or saggy..please dont mistake the two.

CertifiedNaija:
Who would believe that she's of Nigerian descent...

Traffic Bae’s real name is Demetria Obilor and she is the TRAFFIC Anchor for 8 News Now Vegas. She’s been on the air for a couple of years now, and as you can imagine – she has a very strong local following.

A popular website recently called her the most beautiful Traffic Reporter in the world with the hashtag #TrafficBae, as her photos are currently trending online.

She has a younger brother in the States, Uzoma Obilor, who is a bodybuilder...

See her viral photos below...

http://www.certifiednaija.com/2017/01/meet-obilor-nigerian-american-traffic.html?m=1

I love clean babes. .cc lady39

correctguy0900:
U guys are so inexperienced. Trust me, once she removes her bra, the mighty will fall and u begin to doubt what u saw earlier. I have been there. It looks so tiring in zi oza ruuum

Correct guy indeed...but some big boobs still look very firm...

yarimo:
From observation those BOOBS Most be very very soft and smooth

On the contrary I hope they are not saggy cos most big bobs are only fine in bras but when uncuffed...nah eye sore but there are few big boobs that still look nice without bras.

I love full boobs that still look firm.

Singapore1:
you seem ignorant of my point sir... i used IF
of course i am not a mmm participant too, but anything can happen and IF mavrodi decide to pack people's money, no one will know compare to the previous mode of GH AND PH

That IF should not come in because he can't. Direct member to member payment is a full proof.

As I wrote,the best he can do is match his bit coin with members who want to give help using another name or someone other than him.

AngelsAndStars:
you say you are a fx expert but yet call mmm an "investment"

please educate me, what product or instrument or commodity do you invest in MMM?

Where did you see that?

I never called MOM an investment.