₦airaland Forum

Bugatie:
Choi, See ara!
The dude is having ideas

Tarrrr
Iranu abacha booby,let her uncup them and it will be an eyesore.
#team-moderate-bustline

cococandy:
Na today. For your mind telling a lady you will treat her like a slut (which btw no one knows what rubbish you mean by that) is enough to make her not cheat on you?

You treat me like a slutt, I treat you like a manwhore. As you're no longer my husband but philandering jerk.

1:1

Your second wife will be totally inconsequential to me. As I go dey my own room or part of the house with my bobo rolling in the sheets.
Open marriage go sweet die. Choi.
Make sure you will be ready to invest in good beat headphones-surround sound block out preferably because the ooh aah will penetrate reach your room.

As none of us will like to spend our one kobo on getting a divorce, we will live as house mates and enjoy having extra partners while living together.

Paradise.

Chai you must be one hell of a naughty lady,so you can bring a man to your matrimonial home to start sleeping with him because your husband marries another lady after you commited adultery?

You are a joker...

cococandy:
And she will keep on the cheating until you quench from the frustration.

Tell us what you will do. You think say be by talk?

See with your parrot mouth if i marry you and you cheat on me i will just start acting like norrin happen and start treating you like real slut,nd i wll hatesvrw you in ways you cant imagine while looking for another lady to marry because to me you are no longer my wife but a slut.

God forbid that i spend a kobo to file for divorce but you must do that if you want to move on which i will gladly consent to.

You talking about her continuous act of cheating is inconseequential to me.

cococandy:
So you tied her leg.

Make her free indeed.
She doesn't even need a formal divorce to fvck around. You and your second wife will be enjoying and she will be enjoying on the side too with her own bobo.

What will you do?

Na you go tire.
This boy self. Keep amusing us.

lol nshey you know say i fit born you? i no be boy abeg.

Nevertheless you will understand better in future but for now just chere.

YourMain:
Some things really are. For example what if she/he was something she/he wasn't really proud of in the past. And he/she had completely changed their ways. Obviously if you didn't really love him/her you'd hear this and run. You'd let a good girl/guy go because you'd judge them on who they were in the past not who they are now.

Yeah I understand but somethings are so big you'd really have to love them to be okay with it

There is nothing too hideous to hide.As long as you want a sincere affair just spill it out.

cococandy:
So you tied her leg.

Make her free indeed.
She doesn't even need a formal divorce to fvck around. You and your second wife will be enjoying and she will be enjoying on the side too with her own bobo.

What will you do?

Na you go tire.
This boy self. Keep amusing us.

With this mindset of yours walahi i pity that man wey go marry you.

All im stating here are facts and if you like accept or reject but when you become more matured and married you will understand better.

For now keep up your vocal gallivanting

Favolly:
Keep going, I'm really learning from your words of wisdom
In other news, when did divorce become so expensive in Nigeria?

Even if it costs 100naira i wont spend a dime on it.

limamintruth:
I get your point, but try and widen your scope of assumptions please.

That was why I reminded you that this life in itself is a risk.
And just because the first marriage didnt work does not automatically mean the subsequent marriage will also fail.
All marriages may either fail or succeed (irrespective of whether first marriage or second marriage). But we still go ahead to take the risk cos we believe it worth it.

Or would you now say because alot of marriages dont work these days, people should desist from marriage in totality (since no one can be 100% sure whether or not one's fiance(e) will later betray him/her when they later become married)?


Divorce is a risk worth taking if one(be it male or female) is faced with an unrepentant cheating spouse.


Remember not everyone has same level of emotional tolerance when being glaringly cheated.
BTW women have more fragile heart than we men sef. So dont expect them to be able to emotionally manage it when they are continuosly being cheated in marriage sir.


Infact, I personally know of a lady who developed severe mental problem later on in her marriage because of the emotional &psychological torture she withstood for years from her husband. And till date, the said woman has still not fully recovered (though her family have finally succeeded in separating her from the man).

And I strongly believe she wont have been in this mess if only she had divorced the heartless philanderer's as.s early enough.

You are still missing it.

Divorce is not the issue perse but leaving because your hubby philanders which is still ok.

my question is IF THE NEW MAN DOES SAME will0 you move on again, if yes then u are on a long thing and if No then you may say its worth the try.

MarvellousGod:
So men have the right to behave however they wish?

You didn't answer the other question. .

Instead of you to preach fidelity and how men can be more faithful to their partner, you're preaching how ladies should accommodate cheating partners. .
As if ladies were born to endure... na only men sabi enjoy. .... ..

I will respond to you only if you are married.

Its no point wasting my time on replying if you have no clue of the marital experience.

Sometimes i just feel like dropping my write up and allow people make their decisions.

How can u preach that men should not philander when a man xan marry more wives if he desires?

Will it not be fooliishness on my part?

If ladies dont wake up to the fact that it takes the grace of God to have a faithful hubby then let them continue dreaming.

MarvellousGod:
Everything he has written on this thread is hogwash.. counsellor indeed

Your opinion so its your call.

MarvellousGod:
Just as youv hv been putting it to ladies here, i put it to you ; if the second one cheats??

Most men are looking for sexual encounters and infact many of these guys pray for their wife to goof so that they will have reasons to try another new lady so that answers your question.

But we all know that in this cruel world, once a lady changes the second hubby she will be seen as a free for all.

YourMain:
Yeah I get. But sometimes " I don't want to talk about it" doesn't mean one is a bad person. It may just be a very sensitive issue. And its much better for the person to tell you when they're sure of your love.

Nothing is really too sensitive to discuss but please note... I am not saying on a first or second date but if you are noticing some form of deep affection for such person just halt it first and do some real digging and you just might than GOD you did.

EggovinMma:
Seriously, the best to do is to he an "Open book".I hate pretence, that's why I'm very open and outspoken. It gives me enough time to read people's character to see them really for who they are.


Sometimes it's really sexy to allow someone change some aspect of you in a loving way .Not scared one bit of discussing my past, after all I no kill person.

We are on the same page on this.

Many people can lie...Some ladies have fallen for ritualistic man all in the name of business man and many ladies have said YES I DO to a monster.

Favolly:
So you would rather marry a second wife than divorce a cheating wife??

Yea, I guess that makes the situation better. Makes perfect sense!

Please put yourself in the shoes of the man and see if it makes sense for me to spend thousands of my hard earned money to divorce a lady and then makes her very free to be with the man. Never will i be that foolish.

It will be on record that she has cheated so that at anytime she wants to make trouble with the new woman she just won't be able to do that so let her go look for money and divorce herself and i will let her go.

YourMain:
Ehm no. You're hardly going to interview them on your first date together.

Nope, first date is just for peripheral familiarity but before you allow yourself to start developing strong feelings please investigate very well and don't just fall for cheap talks.

Favolly:
If at 26, You catch your wife cheating, wouldn't you leave?

I will never divorce a cheating wife instead i will just marry another one and allow her walk out of my life gently.

GOD forbid i waste my hard earned money to divorce a slut.

Have you always wondered why some people are quick to say "i don't want to talk about it" whenever a new person in their life asks why they broke up with an ex?

I guess most times people who are quick to waive the discussion might just have something sensitive they do not want to share because in many instances we tend to allow the feeling of initial gragra cloud our sense of reasoning and just fall in love with someone who was really a nightmare to his or her ex(es) no wonder why many companies ask for letter of reference from your past employer or someone that can really vouch for you.

My advice to ladies or guys who seem to lose their sense of reasoning due to "desperation to get married" is to calm down and do serious research on whoever they want to settle with.I believe if we all imbibe the culture of insisting that we speak one on one with an ex of our potential new partner or dig into their past,we will save ourselves unpleasant surprises and avoidable heart aches.

This is not just about believing whatever he or she tells you due to the decietful nature of people but its about making a thorough due diligence by speaking to a friend,neighbor,sibling,co-worker or even the ex of that person just to have a good picture of who you are about to commit yourself to.

I know this sounds funny but i believe its reasonable and this is the secret of long lasting marriages of our parents because in those days,they don't joke with due diligence up to the generations of the great grand parents of the potential spouse..lol!.

Many men have lost their lives indulging with married ladies who lied to them that they are single as well as many men losing all they ever worked for to a dangerous gold digger as well as evil ladies and many ladies have ended up getting deeply involved with a married man or even a notorious guy without having a clue.

No matter how seemingly innocent and responsible that guy or lady may look outwardly,trust me on this,it is always better to scrutinize the past of any new person we want to start a real affair with because when it comes to character, more often than not, humans are like leopards who never change their spots


Hope this makes sense.

cococandy:
Come to think of it, isn't better to leave at a young age than wait until it's too late?
For a woman less than 40 and still sexually active, putting up with a serial philanderer is a good way to waste her youth.
The earlier she leaves, the better chances she has of putting her life back on track and moving in with someone else if that's what she wants.

God forbid at 26 a lady has to endure a philanderer. Until when?

At that stage, she should be enjoying her marriage and experimenting in all the corners of the house with her darling husband, but he's busy donating his cum all over town and bringing the watery remains back to her. Tufia.
It's a waste of young womanhood. Horrible waste.

It would even be easier for a woman above 45 to find other ways of dealing with a man who started philandering in his middle age. Maybe do back to him with her own young bobo or ignore him if she's "menopausing" and not interested in sex with him anymore.

I don't know how to explain this.

I am not encouraging any man to cheat on their wives but these things happen in 7 out of 10 cases and this is why i threw this very sensitive and vital questions for married ladies to ponder over.

I dont know but i presume you are still young to understand this. Pretty face or sexy body does not keep a man faithful to a woman, please go out and you will be amazed at the number of sexy pretty ladies that are single and ready to mingle and its like these babes do not give a fvk if the man is married or not so lets leave sentiments,im not saying there are no faithful men out there and im not going to pretend that im unaware of the fact that many marriages crash today because of this monster called infidelity.

Yet i have seen countless number of ladies change man after man until many men have really used them before they realize that there is more to life than being a robocop over a man's fidelity.

So these questions are for those who find themselves with a cheating hubby and for those who divorcees the question is if the second one does same wil they continue their quest?

I want evry lady reading this to let this sink...your happiness in life or marriage must never be hinged on a man's fidelity towards you else you will only live a miserable life because some ladies are out there to unseat you from your marriage.

Its so foolish that some ladies just rush out of their marriage to give room for a side chic to come dominate a home they have built for years and ironically these ladies go out to start sleeping around with even worse guys MOST TIMES and only very minute few get another hubby fast enough.

I have really tried to make this explicit.

See no randy man in 95% of the case is ready to give up his precious woman or wife for a desperate low self esteem lady but he just wants to have her as a side meal and in most cases what we have is husband sharers and not snatchers but it is the wife at home thaat willingly give up her man to be snatched and men as weak as they are will always be carried away by the tot of having a new body to explore so once you leave the lady moves in and take over the man and the man forgets you ever exists and worse still the so called lady divorcees end up living a solitary life or even start frolicking about with useless men so who is fooling who.

If every lady can understand how to remain indifferent, trust me, that randy hubby will always eat these desperate ladies and run back to you.

limamintruth:
The reality on ground is that it is not an impossibility for divorced women to later succcessfully remarry. That is the only reality on ground.


I dont know much about the south region though, but even though we have the highest rate of divorced women in nigeria here in the north, it will interest you to note that alot of these divorced women successfully remarry later on.


Our women must not be discouraged from availing themselves of the option of divorce when faced with unrepentant cheating husbands. Their well being should be most paramount, rather than an already dead marriage sir.

Now you are twisting things.

I am not talking about divorcees not getting married but the point is if you divorce your philandering hubby and marry another man who ends up towing same path, will you also leave that marriage and start shopping with your body for a faithful man?

This is my point here.

cococandy:
Come to think of it, isn't better to leave at a young age than wait until it's too late?
For a woman less than 40 and still sexually active, putting up with a serial philanderer is a good way to waste her youth.
The earlier she leaves, the better chances she has of putting her life back on track and moving in with someone else if that's what she wants.

God forbid at 26 a lady has to endure a philanderer. Until when?

At that stage, she should be enjoying her marriage and experimenting in all the corners of the house with her darling husband, but he's busy donating his cum all over town and bringing the watery remains back to her. Tufia.
It's a waste of young womanhood. Horrible waste.

It would even be easier for a woman above 45 to find other ways of dealing with a man who started philandering in his middle age. Maybe do back to him with her own young bobo or ignore him if she's "menopausing" and not interested in sex with him anymore.

At last you are making an intellectually sound post void of unwarranted vulgarity. Congrats to your maturity. I will come back to reply you.

freecocoa:
Lol, oh! Aren't you a clown?

If you don't know how to post comments intellectual;ly i may just stop replying to you.

limamintruth:
Are you then insinuating that married women should still remain with their unrepentant cheating husbands? Dont you think the ladies' action of condoning their spouses' immoral ways will send across a bad message to the kids (that it is ok to cheat in marriage)?


Remember life itself is a risk; hence, its not an impossibility for a female divorcee to later find true love and successfully remarry after the divorce.

No matter how young unmarried teenagers or ladies in their twenties see this thread, they will never understand and i understand perfectly and this was why i asked married ladies but trust nairaland, na teenagers and young ladies in their adolescent 20s dey come rant.

They still believe that the body that is intoxicating them can make any man stay faithful to them maybe they should ask some hot divorcees to have a better idea.

Its no gain saying that im only passionate about writing and it will do any young lady a great good to see my write ups objectively and not dogmatically.

This is not about condoling a cheating hubby but the reality on ground.

Joy1706:
Whaaaaaat! You a marriage counsellor? Those women no like themselves at alllllll

If you are married just pray you do not catch your hubby cheating on you BUR if that happens just come back and read this thread again.

Joy1706:
Na no. 4 sure pass o. I know of someone wwho husband was a chronic cheat. She prayed o, begged o every every. One day she told him to his face that th days of her being faithful are over. Now na she dey do pass the man. The man has begged, threatened, reported her. For where? He can't chase her out as she contributed to the building of the house. Now the man don mellow but the woman's own just dey start

Oh i see, no wonder...

Omotayor123:
I use the word crazy because your 5 questions only give married women one Option And that is to stay with a philanderer husband.

Don't women deserve more than that Why should women stay with a philanderer Why not talk to the men to be a faithful and caring husband Men deserves a faithful wife but women don't deserve a faithful husband shey

The thing dey vex me seriously. No, I'm not married But I will sooner or later.
Letz say A big No to Cheaters!!!

I understand you but unfortunately you can only hope your hubby does not cheat on you cos you have no discresionary tendency to know a potential philanderer.

freecocoa:
You say that it's in a man's nature to cheat, meaning nothing can be done about the cheating, then am saying if this is indeed true, then women will cheat more, thereby giving men kids that aren't theirs, to father.

lol.. nah today woman don dey cheat?

The point is that for a woman with a slutty mindset number 4 is perfect for her but at the end she will be a miserable loner because after screwing the whole men she can find,she will end up a miseranle loner for the rest of her life.

I see such ladies everywhere who galivants about in the 20s 30s and even early 40s after they were driven out by their hubby just to be alone in their later years.

One secret many ladies dont know is that except a man is really rich,all his gragra is just for a short time.

freecocoa:
Lmao

Dude, I will beat a man in a cheating game if it ever came down to that.

Which stigma? Are you saying my hubby will cheat to my face?

Freecoco you are on your own o. Whatever rocks your boat.

Sometimes i laugh at some ladies that hink cheating is a way of revenge. T will surprise them when it dawns on them because the same man you cheat with will tell you to your face how useless you are...

We are living n a wicked world of men.

freecocoa:
It's alright, after all, no one can sincerely say they know all what their partner's been up to(well unless you are taping him/her, goodluck with that.)so no need to say one's a 100% sure, so when he is dying for her and cheating, he better make sure she never finds out.

If what you claim is true, then expect that more men won't be real fathers of their kids.

That last paragraph is confusing...please explain the last paragraph.

horexy:
Money is gooooooood.
I wil never be poor in Jesus name

Then follow youur passon

freecocoa:
Really? Every man must cheat, if I ever for any reason believe this after my research, than that means I'm cheating in marriage, because whatever will make him cheat despite trying his best not to, (meaning he couldn't say no), will definitely happen to me too, leading me to cheat, as afterall, we are both humans with no self control.

Absolutely you are free to cheat on a vheating hubby...its your choice as long as you can bear the stigma.

See dont ever be among those who claim equality with men when it comes to philandering except you just want to jettison your essence as a woman.

If you are divorced base on adultry,walahi it will take the grace of God to find even a blind man to marry you except he has no clue...be wise.

xynerise:
Because he has not been caught doesn't mean he doesn't cheat

*Runs out sighting someone*

One of the dumbest statements ladies utter is "My man can never cheat on me"

Even pastors and bishops cheat on their wives and just as you wrote..only the ones that are caught are called philanderers while smooth operators are the pride of their women.

The earlier ladies wake up the better. If you like change spouse a million times,except there is a way to know a potential cheat,any lady who leaves a man due to sexual unfaithfullness to be with another man is only playing a ping pong game with her body and emotions.

A guy can die for you yet cheat on you and its either a lady understands this or she remains in delusion as long as she lives.

Omotayor123:
Those are Crazy questions I swear!

Why not use words liike tough? sounds more intellectually decent but i guess you are far from understanding the marital institution so its ok to feel they are crazy.

Only marrried ladies will identify with the relevance.

Maybe only married ladies should make comments...so that the thread can serve its purpose except maybe you are married.