₦airaland Forum

SUGARBEE:
I wish Toks2008
Elcapito
BeeBeeOoh
Cutehector
LadyBoss1
Lalasticlala
BUTCHCASSIDY

A happy new month..


[size=15pt]#SUGARBEE[/size]

Thanks dearie

Wishing you thee best of the remaining minths in 2015

Cutehector:
u wan make I die for bed?

But you chose L

Cutehector:
L is d sexiest.....

LOL! So you love them surplus

MrKontrovErsy:
tru dat!
God being generous since no calender

If every man is disciplined enough to patiently get the lady with his preferred body structure i believe it will reduce sexual infidelity to a great extent.

Behavior is an important factor in choosing a lady but i have also realized that what ever pleases a man's eyes usually will be pleasing to his soul.

CUM4WHAT:
if only ur I.Q is up to the digits of my acount balance i may have listened. Buh meanwhile u jux a glorified f00l

You just nailed yourself with the poo you just wrote and i pity that lady that will be unfortunate to have a toddler like you as a man in her life.

WTF! Did i just read that poo?

Apparently i have degraded myself to ever respond to you.OH my what a toddler/

MrKontrovErsy:
so my meat na their poison right?

In-fact he always asks me what i see attractive in B,E or T and i kinda wonder how he is coping with the L

GOD is amazingly ingenious to create different shapes to meet the needs of different guys.

MrKontrovErsy:
ONLY real guyz will understand

I beg to disagree on that because i have an older brother that prefers the L big time and a younger bro who loves A or second U with a passion.

This is why it is so amazing that the lady you see and may wow you might not even be looked upon twice by another man.

SUGARBEE:
Sentiments apart, you need to ignore what she said if you really love her..

[size=15pt]#SUGARBEE[/size]

Ladies can spit any trash when they are upset so the guy should just let it pass.

MrKontrovErsy:
B.E.T

Those are my preferred choices too and any of the three is just ok by me.

CUM4WHAT:
NONSENSE...


Is dis

Ur purpose of cuming to dis life. Op hope u got a future ambition?

I can afford to overlook your comments but i would like to address your subliminal perpetual psychological and mental insecurities.

I quite understand that your IQ can not decipher what it means to have a creative writing skill because apparently all the threads you have ever created are vague as well as lack any form of intellectual prowess because all you have ever wrote is either reporting one bias story or the other.

Let me advice you mr attention seeker,anytime you come across a thread on nairaland that does not catch your fancy just do yourself the honor of not clicking on it rather than come in to make a grave mockery of yourself.

My brotherly 40cents.

Every woman is excellently beautiful no matter how she looks.

I believe that every man on earth will have his specification as regards how he wants his lady to look and if you are a lady reading this,im very positive that you will fit into one of these body structures and if you look closely, you will see that each of these ladies are beautiful in their own different ways.

I know some guys that will never go for a slim lady while some will prefer skinny ones.I also have a brother who will never touch slim ladies so the good news is that no matter how you look,there is a man out there who will love you just the way you are.

Don't allow any man manage you, talk down on you or make you feel second best because of your body structure and the first duty you owe yourself is loving yourself the way you are and when you try to keep fit,don't do it for any man but only do it to maintain good health.

So If you are guy viewing this,just state the best type of body type you want and make sure you get a woman with that body type as your wife to reduce the chance of lusting after another chic.

And if you are a lady viewing this, we will not mind knowing the body type you have from these lovely varieties *winks*

hebenezher:
kinda much pals. here's is what I'm going through: we had a misunderstanding, the cause really was that I didn't call her just for a whole day, she normally seems to get upset and tryna avoid me whenever I behave as if of don't have her time. so I called late in the night around 10pm, her phone rang and the next thing she did is switched off her phone. then the second day around 12pm she so my me an sms, but I replied her with a blasting text, which I told her I'm different from other guys that follow her around like pigs, that I trully love her, but if she wants to be behaving like, then to hell with love and told her that to hell with whatever she stands for, actually I insulted her cause that wasn't the first time she did what she did. after all these, she called I didn't pick, then she text me on whatsapp saying "thanks for the message, that she loves it" especially the "to hell with whatever she stands for, that was why she called. I ignored the message and gave her of a week, I decided to get her upset and upload females pictures and status inserting other femAles names. which I think got her angry, she started updating status saying she doesn't care about, nagging all sort. so yesterday I typed her, she didn't reply, then I asked why she ignored it she asked if it hurts, I said No. pals, she's been behaving stupidly, updating males name on her status and uploading pictures with her male friends, she's really doing shit presently. avoiding me. I decided to ask if the relationship is still on or has ended. guys, she wouldn't reply to that question instead she will twist it and says she's busy.. I'm tired, I love her.. the way she's behaving might just make me move on with someone else, which of don't wish to.. while chatting with her, she update a status saying, "have you ever looked at someone and just gets annoyed? " I'm just Know what to do. whenever I tell her to stop all these, she asks whether it's hurting me or not. well, av decided to leave whatsapp and let her do her shit for sometimes.. I mean she's too arrogant, she plays mind games, she's from Benin. while this fight is ongoing she told me, I'm fun to chat with but not fun to be with, cause I'm already getting upset with her on whatsapp. I need advice pals, whether to ignore her and move on. moreover, she told me, she didn't get hurt while I was behaving that way, but she does get hurt I know, I've given given her several excuses, but she's adamant on behaving that way. advice please

Thanks for the additional info.

Now you need to understand that the job lies with you at least for now until she outgrows her teenage excesses.

She is 18 and its so expected of her to be very erratic as this nature is very peculiar to teenagers.

The teenage brain is hungry for stimulation. But there is an unprecedented amount of it in today’s world, maybe more than ever. Because teenagers lack access to their frontal lobes, using their judgement to say: “I’ve had enough” or “I need to stop and do something else” is still a weakness for them and this is the basis for their impulsive behaviour – they’re not planning ahead. Their priorities are not as common sense as they will become over time hence will do outlandish things to make you mad without really reading any meanings to these things and to them they are having a swell time catching fun.

So as a guy of 20 you must understand that you are just a little above the adolescent age and you must learn to be more matured,subtle and understanding in the affair.

Ignore her excesses and guide her calmly and patiently.Do not heat up arguments or do/say stuffs that will be aggravating and trust me, in another year or two she will come to appreciate your mature disposition and thank you for making her more matured.

This is why i always advocate for wider gaps in age difference for teenage girls and ladies in very early twenties and the guy they are seeing so that the presumed maturity of the guy will balance the possible immaturity of the lady but then as they say,age is not really a factor when there is true affection between two people.

Hope this helps

AfroKnight:
I don't think it is possible to satisfy women. The attention you give them can never be enough. They want to be by your side or hear your voice always and you dare not tell them no. Or you will hear "is that thing more important than me?" We know there is no truthful answer to that question.

I think women should be managed like companies, business or teams. Forget about satisfying them.

If anyman is lucky enough to see a clingy lady as a partner please cherish her except her motive for clinging on you is an auterior one.

Nayah:
Do you think I m fade?

Apparently you dont want to disclose it so i will let it pass

inkz:
Op u d jonz u must be high on expired weed

I quite understand your stand poiint.

Only mature minds will decipher what i wrote but boys and teenagers at heart will not comprehend.

stjudas:
Good day people. I am a Corps member of 2015 batch A. I have a girlfriend in her third year in school. Sincerely, I love her but she's hell bent on getting married. I am far from ready and there is this guy she dated few years back for few months before he traveled to India. This guy is really disturbing my girl, promising to marry her as soon as he returns to Nigeria next month. In fact, Dec. 30 has been scheduled for Introduction. Now my problem isn't her leaving me, but for the wrong person. I suspect he's a very bad guy and would make her cry. I tried convincing her to wait for better man even if it wasn't going to be me that all I cared about was her happiness. So, fellow Nairalanders how do I convince her and what way is best to go about this? Below is a message I sent her on Facebook and all she replied was "thank you," and soon she called me and started crying. I inquired why she was crying but she said she doesn't know and hung up. Pls, no insults. Don't tell me I should be thinking of how to get a job or start a small business 'cause it's all in my plans. Your contributions will be appreciated. Thanks.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
JUST BEFORE DECEMBER 30.

Bury this little piece in your heart, I took my time to write it for you. It's no cynicism so don't get it twisted. Marriage is a lifetime commitment; once you're in, you're in. Don't ignore the warning signals, it could be very fatal.

1. COURT HIM AGAIN: Don't assume he's the cool guy you use to know. Try courting him for 8 to 12 months before you tie the knot. Remember, he's been outside the country, gathered a handful of experiences and the resultant of this experiences will greatly determine his new personality, either for better or for worse. Ignoring or failing to take this one step is worst of all things you would ever do.

2. BE SURE OF WHAT HE DOES:
Go beyond your emotions and look with your mind's eyes. Can you trust what he tells you he does for a living? Have you sought an answer to these questions: How does he send his goods to Nigeria? Who receives the bales of clothes he sends in and who sells them and how does he get his money back? Through PayPal, Western Money Union Transfer or what? Investigate to be sure it's true.
When he's not sending clothes to Nigeria what does he do? Does he have a part-time job or own a business in India? If a part-time time job, what's the name of the company he works for and what position does he occupy. What are his job functions? If he owns a business, what kind.
Ask him how much he makes and see if it's in coherence with how much you think he's worth. Ask him these question and many more you can think of in quick succession, with that aura of intelligence of one who works with the FBI. Don't give him a chance to think! Just quickly throw the questions at him.
Observe if he's nervous or cool when giving answers. Compare all the information he provides with your previous knowledge of him and make your judgement. Trust your intuition!

3. PROMISES MAY NEVER BE FULFILLED:
Yes, he promised to make you Manager of his current business so he could move into importation of automobile spare parts. Be sure he will do this. Never you assume or just believe, it's not the Gospel after all. Compel him (though you do not have the right to) to start, maybe, a smaller business for you. If he cheerfully does, it could be an indicator that he will do bigger things. Do you still remember what the Bible says: He that is faithful in little is faithful in much.

4. DISCUSS THE MARGINS:
You are a woman, I believe, with dreams and goals. A savvy young girl poised for greatness, whose primary function as a wife is not to mop the floor, wash dishes, cook good foods and make babies. You've got a career life and a margin should be drawn between it and your marital life. I also believe you got goals to accomplish before you turn 30. Ask him how he intends to help you achieve those goals.

5. NEVER GIVE IN TO PRESSURE:
I understand the pressure by the African society on her girl child in getting married. It isn't your last chance, Baby. You are beautiful, intelligent and people tend to like you. You know this. I remember you once told me, "I no be bad market." Appreciate yourself and never take that step except you are sure you want to. The future holds a lot.

6. YOUR DAD, YOUR COUNSELOR:
I have not had the opportunity to meet with any of your parents, but somehow from what I have learned, dad is shrewder than mum (I'm not a diviner. It's just an opinion. I could be wrong). Discuss your man with him expressing the fears and confidence you have in him (your man), I'm sure he (dad) will have something very useful to tell you. Never ignore his advice.

7. AFTER THE WEDDING:
Don't get married to a ghost who will leave you for another woman in an unknown country for years in the guise of searching for endless business opportunities. I know of a victim, my mum’s best friend, then. She got married to a man, a US Naval Officer, in Owerri, in December 2001. The wedding was the talk of town as cash was lavished. The young man traveled back to the States early February 2002 promising her to come see her once in a while. The lady pleaded to go with him but he insisted that it won't be necessary as he plans to return home and start up a new life with her soon. He traveled back and that's all the lady and my mum saw of him. You think he could be dead? NO! He was seen shopping in Las Vegas in early 2013 by one of the friends of the lady who attended the wedding and had traveled to the city.

8. THE BALL IS IN YOUR COURT:
I don't have anything much to say here. It is your life, your decision. Always be true to yourself and your findings about him. Remember to trust your judgement. Your decision is ultimate.

Consider the eight points critically before December 30. I wish you the best marriage can offer. I love you. Have a nice day.

If i may ask bro,what is stopping you from getting married to her?

It is ok to write all these to her but the question is..are you ready to marry her?

If you propose to her right now will she say yes?

There is really no right choice or bad choice of spouse but what we have is our choice and once we make that choice we must face the consequence.

The fact that you are a corper or still searching for job or source of livelihood is no excuse AS LONG AS SHE DOES NOT MIND.

Just get a roof over your head,go to her people for a small introduction and engagement ceremony,and proceed to registry then meticulously build your lives together and once the money starts rolling in do a befitting wedding ceremony.

If you know you don't love her enough to take this bold step i suggest you let her follow her heart and live with her choice.

My humble advice

imsuboi:
The title of this thread should be rephrased to:
An idiot's opinion on How to lick a Nigerian lady's _asshole.
OP, your brain cells must have been calcified.
I pity you & your offspring. SMH

kurupt1:
Mugu.so what does the woman do for you?your a real mugu.you should please a bad woman happy cos she is just a woman??your really a first class mugu.its people like you that have made these women entitled simply cos are they are women.Aboki

Boys will always be boys.

hebenezher:
kinda much pals. here's is what I'm going through: we had a misunderstanding, the cause really was that I didn't call her just for a whole day, she normally seems to get upset and tryna avoid me whenever I behave as if of don't have her time. so I called late in the night around 10pm, her phone rang and the next thing she did is switched off her phone. then the second day around 12pm she so my me an sms, but I replied her with a blasting text, which I told her I'm different from other guys that follow her around like pigs, that I trully love her, but if she wants to be behaving like, then to hell with love and told her that to hell with whatever she stands for, actually I insulted her cause that wasn't the first time she did what she did. after all these, she called I didn't pick, then she text me on whatsapp saying "thanks for the message, that she loves it" especially the "to hell with whatever she stands for, that was why she called. I ignored the message and gave her of a week, I decided to get her upset and upload females pictures and status inserting other femAles names. which I think got her angry, she started updating status saying she doesn't care about, nagging all sort. so yesterday I typed her, she didn't reply, then I asked why she ignored it she asked if it hurts, I said No. pals, she's been behaving stupidly, updating males name on her status and uploading pictures with her male friends, she's really doing shit presently. avoiding me. I decided to ask if the relationship is still on or has ended. guys, she wouldn't reply to that question instead she will twist it and says she's busy.. I'm tired, I love her.. the way she's behaving might just make me move on with someone else, which of don't wish to.. while chatting with her, she update a status saying, "have you ever looked at someone and just gets annoyed? " I'm just Know what to do. whenever I tell her to stop all these, she asks whether it's hurting me or not. well, av decided to leave whatsapp and let her do her shit for sometimes.. I mean she's too arrogant, she plays mind games, she's from Benin. while this fight is ongoing she told me, I'm fun to chat with but not fun to be with, cause I'm already getting upset with her on whatsapp. I need advice pals, whether to ignore her and move on. moreover, she told me, she didn't get hurt while I was behaving that way, but she does get hurt I know, I've given given her several excuses, but she's adamant on behaving that way. advice please

I would like to know your age and hers as well as the duration of the affair.

Thanks

samuelson06:
You can never satisfy a woman. Trying to do that is digging your grave at a very prime age because you'll get fraustrated and die. Women are insatiable. They just demand too much. Just imagine one I have here, she talks too much and still expect me to give her attention and contribute to her gist. She doesn't care if am busy, once she's through with what she does, am in trouble with gist. If I don't give much attention, she'll feign something flying into her eyes and then use that to get my urgent attention. Yesterday, she claimed if she and my laptop were to be away, I'll miss my laptop more than her. Now tell me, how can I defend this? This is someone that I give all my love without any side chick. What should I do again?

You just got my message bro.

They are the first wonder of the world and no matter what you do,they may never ever appreciate yet you can't decide to treat them badly

vague:
Uncle toks2008 you agemates are already sending their children to university and you are here creating nonsensical threads. Leave nairaland and go marry. If they are running away from you like veld fire, you may have to change your attitude towards them.

Your user name says it all.

You are chronically childish,dumb,vague and myopic

nnachukz:
Mugu! Mugu!! Mugu!!! I refuse to be a m.oron to any girl.

Doing all the listed does not make you a slowpoke but a real man who knows his responsibilities and you can stand tall and tell a lady to her face that you have no reason to take the blame for whatever negative actions she takes

philcupid:
I still don't understand why a guy will be following rules and rules just for a girl!??!! It's crazy..... Be yourself, be original as you dey with your friends..... If you aren't caring before you met her, you would only be acting... My advice:BE YOURSELF, A GIRL OUT THERE WILL LIVE YOU JUST THE WAY YOU ARE DON'T FORCE IT

My brother believe it or not these daughters of eve are very complex and the best you can do is to be good to them not minding that they can turn around and throw it back at your face.

MzNelly:
19 and 21.

Ok now get this vital advice from me.

Unfortunately in my opinion,there is a high possibility that none of these two may provide you with a purposeful affair except you are extremely lucky because the age gap seems too close but you may not understand now until when you are probably some years deep in the affairs and these guys might still be unready for real commitment at 28 while you will be at your prime at 25/26 but that is by the way.

Now to your main issue i guess you are probably having a normal feeling of indecisiveness considering your age and that is perfectly normal and YES there is a possibility that one of these two guys may not really feel that real deal so don't rush it.

Don't feel like you need to make a decision right away. Your decision could take some time. During that time, hopefully, one of the guys will do something good or bad to make the decision much easier for you. As long as you haven't committed to either guy and don't feel like you're being disloyal to one guy by hanging out with the other, then you should take some time to make the decision.

Just don't drag it on too long and you can just observe for about 8 months and please during this time avoid sexual intimacy with either of the two which will make your decision easier to make because once you allow sexual contacts then if at the end you pick one guy, but he finds out that you've been hanging out with another guy for the last few months, then he may feel hurt or slighted and will not waste a second bringing you down with the sexual acts he has with you and in-case you have been allowing both of them to be sexual with you then its time to stop and take time out to choose wisely.

But be sure to look out for the guy that truly loves you and not the one you love.


My candid advice

The fact is that women are the most complex and complicated creation of GOD and infact i call them the first wonder of the world


-A lady will say she wants a faithful man but will prefer to be with a man every other lady wants.
-A lady will practically friend-zone a man who genuinely wants her and would prefer to run after another guy who does not want her.
-A lady will say there is no husband material but what she is implying is that her own specification of a tall,cute,rich,romantic...is rare.
-Many ladies will talk down on polygamy but would prefer to be the side dish of a rich guy rather than be the only lady of a poor dude.
-And a lady can be with one man,get married to him,have all his children and even grow old with him yet her heart will be with another all the days of her life. I can continue to list several situations to confirm the complexity of women.

The problem is that many men are always quick to bring down every woman because of the bad ones they have come across but this is grossly unfair because every lady is not the same and we must treat any new lady special regardless of the experience we had with an ex.

Nevertheless,i think i have come up with the best way to be at peace with a woman and trust me,if you follow this golden advice,you will always have peace with any lady you choose to be with and here they are.


1.Love your lady with so much passion.

2.Lavish her with gifts.

3.Treat her like a queen.

4.Don't ever raise your hand to beat her or insult her in anyway.

5.Listen to her when she wants to be heard.

6.Shower her with lots of accolades.

7.Give her undivided attention.

8.Be very romantic towards her.

9.Respect her above others.

10.Don't cheat on her in anyway.

11.Provide her needs to the very best of your ability.

12.Don't ever break her heart or make her cry.

13.Be extremely caring.

14.Pamper her in anyway imaginable.

.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
15.But despite all these,expect the worst from her because she can still turn around and rub all the above on your face

The bottom line is that the man that will please a woman has not been created but the best we can do is to try all we can not to give them an excuse to misbehave but still expect the worst from them.If you treat her badly,she will have a good excuse so just treat her very well so that when she misbehaves,there will be no excuse for her to hold on to and her folly will be conspicuous to the world.

This is the only way you can be at peace with a woman so that if she eventually shows her color despite all your efforts to please her,you will be psychologically ready and will never be a surprise to you.

My candid opinion.

Youngpo413:
so you have pity for ladies abi?you a are a big learner,as for me,I don't pity any lady,what ever happens to a lady,I always believe they deserves it,infact if I see any means,I will add more pains to their injuries....b!tches.

You can never generalize no matter how obviously bad a lady can be.

The best we can do is to give our best to any lady in our lives yet expect the worst from her.

MzNelly:
No, it's not what it seems.

I just feel like I would rather PM you for advice rather than out here in the open.

It is allowed to open a new id if you want to be anonymous and i really can't cope giving advice on watsup except for any other reason.

Its better we discuss every issue here so that others can learn.

Hope you get.

Please if you can not provide your age info and that of the other person concerned i wil advice you don't bother posting your issues here.

The age info is very very vital and i can't stress this enough.

Thanks

MzNelly:
You know what? Nvm

Its quite unfortunate that you want a very profitable advice yet you refuse to provide the essential info to ensure you get the best advice.

You are not doing me a favor by providing these info but yourself so you its your call.

Have a nice week ahead.

Cutehector:
lmao.. Not dat kind of spirit jooor.. I mean someone who monitors ur online activities all the time...

Then apparently the person likes you so just check out the person and see if you can spark off a good relationship and go for it.

Its a privilege to be adored by the opposite sex and we must never take advantage of them as well as make them feel cheap,If you like the person then go for it but if you don't please ignore and don't ever take advantage of the person.

MzNelly:
What do you do when you find yourself in love with two people?

Sorry what are the ages of these two guys?

stan241:
Uncle toks o wey u


I'm attracted to what I've now grown to term "emotionally unavailable" ladies

I'm a very sad romantic, the little things like the suprise/unannounced visits, out of the blue texts at nights, PDA and what have you i love those things, the last meaningful relationship i had we dated for around 6months and we would talk every single day and more than once too plus the chats maybe I'm still hung up on her but its been close to 2yrs now

Every other lady I've met since are just not available emotionally, I'm the one who remembers to call, wants them to visit,texts e.t.c

Warris wrong with moi uncle toks?

You wrote that you are in your mid 20s so i can imagine its not about teenage emotional rush.

This is one thing you must understand about ladies.

Most ladies get attracted more to guys who show them that he has a life and i mean a real busy life other than make them a focal point.

You need to really mellow down on the attention you give them.

Yes ladies love caring,romantic and readily available guy but make them miss you and make them want you and if you can painstakingly do this, you wil realize how affectionate ladies will be towards you.

The bottom line is that ladies have subconscious complex issues and they will naturally gravitate towards guys who shows less attention for them so get busy and be less clingy to any new lady you will come across without losing your romantic touch and you will likely get more appreciation from the lady.

My humble advice.

MzNelly:
What do you do when you find yourself in love with two people?

Its quite normal to have peripheral feelings for two people and not the love you think it is.
Unfortunately i cant continue with this advice until i know your age because as i wrote before,age plays a major role in the way we think and act towards issues of the heart. So please state your age.