₦airaland Forum

family6644:
I need serious advise from experienced nairalanders, please forgive my lengthy message because it requires detailed explanations.

I lost my wife exactly 3 months ago, 4 years of relationship and 13 years of marriage with her before she passed on, she left behind 3kids, 13yr old girl 7yr and 3yr old boys. I understand marriages are full of their challenges but we have been through the journey and we came out victorious having a loving and happy home, a union other partners appreciates.

My late wife was so organized and we trainned my kids to be independent while she travels on local business trips. So I just needed to continue our family habit of buying and stocking everything at home while they manage themselves with the help of an older maid who has been part of the family for many years, in short, we are faring quite well as I continue to mourn my wife and carry on with life.

Here is the problem, from a lot of condolence messages coming in on my Facebook, I had the chance to reply some of them 2weeks ago, I met this single mother of two who invited my kids to her daughter's birthday party, i was reluctant but she said it is time to start taking the kids out since they are yet to resume school, exactly what they needed at that point was the usual outing which has been missing for a while since their mother's sickness and after her demise, approx 6months in total. She said it's not a loud party that she needed only my kids for the small sitting room party.

I decided, went to the party with the kids, it was fun for the kids, I have not seen them happy like that in a long while, it made me happy too, they fell in love with the two sisters and their mother all like a miracle, my little 3year old boy started calling her mommy, others follow and it all seem like a family reunion. We left late at night with her girls asking that they meet again the next day which was a Sunday. To cut it short, my kids and hers agreed to meet the next day except for me. To be honest, the lady is a nice and lovely person to be with, she's a realtor who can work from home, she's real and beautiful, she has been a single mother for 4yrs after her husband travelled out and abandoned them to marry another woman, that's according to her.

She called me that her kids could not allow her rest, they said if we can't come, she should bring them to our house, I mildly rejected but i was persuaded by my daughter and my first son to have them around, I could see that they have bonded quite well, I want my kids to be happy too, that's what I have always wanted for them so I agreed and gave them our address. To cut the story short, I find it impossible to separate the two families that has come together to become one, when they were leaving back to their house my kids pleaded with me to allow them go with mommy to her house, I understand that is real because she's lovely with kids. I had the confidence to trust my kids with someone for the first time in my life. They didn't want to come back, I had to go and pick them up the next day, all of them made sure they came back home with me, we started living together as a family and everyone was enjoying it.

It became an automatic affair with her, I was worried about it been too early, I had to involve few of my friends to seek opinions, some were happy that i could get a good mother for my kids this soon, others asked me to stop the family union and give it a little time to study her character. I suggested some space but she felt very bad, she thinks I am sending them away. I had to allow them stay while I use the opportunity to observe the new found love and family.

12days after, I realize that in a bid to reorganize me and help me to move ahead in life, she totally disregards anything that concerns my late wife whom I still hold dear to my heart, same as my daughter and my adopted daughter, I don't like to address her as a maid. We loved and cherished my late wife, everything she introduced seems to be strange to the norms of the family. If I try to raise my concerns for her to adjust, she will simply tell me that the dead is dead and I should just forget everything about her including whatever she stood for as a mother and wife.

If I try to talk some senses into her to make her understand that brooding over the dead is different from honouring and respecting the deseased, she gets really angry claiming I am comparing her with a dead person. Whatever she discovers as our way of doing things in the family she disregards it and replaces it with her own way without minding how we feel as a family or how easy or difficult it is for us to adjust.

It looks like we are the only ones tolerating and accommodating them here, I have tried with no avail to stop her from insulting the memory of my late wife. I discussed with each and everyone at home, they all wish I could perform a miracle to have them leave because no one can tolerate the mother and kids anymore, I am equally fed up myself and willing to take a break.

I have a friend who is aware of my problems with her, he told me that I am the problem here, he said it will be hard for any woman to fit into our family way of doing things and it will be difficult for us to cope with a different way of life introduced by another woman.

I hope I can get one or two advices that could help. I am quite confused

This is simple na. Keep cohabiting with her but don't marry yet. Time will sort you out

SisterFire:
Time for my question in regards to justice and righteousness

Illustr
If you as a struggling man joins the nigerian police force after toiling to be better in life surrounded by negentropy and multi corruption ,
A year into police force , you are killed by UGM, after then u went to Vosod TO SEEK FOR JUSTICE AND YOU WERE GRANTED WITH LOTS OF SUPERNATURAL POWER TO SERVE JUSTICE,

Question proper
WHOM WILL U CARRY YOUR JUSTICE ON? LIKE WHOM WILL U START DESTROYING


... Ahasco , dazzlingd , goddys , tloc , edmunddantes , philipson02 godsaklek , Uncleck everyone pls I want to know ur submission ...and B4 u shout god forbid I get killed by UGM ,know it that ' a universal law or my culculæi 230: 9 states that " those who treasure their life loses it and those who don't gains it here or there"

A police officer who has been to the VOSOD would definitely know that UGM fight for justice. If he seeks for revenge it would have to be against the politicians who used him as tool for oppression and injustice. But I doubt if he would want to because he too is an accomplice; he was used so he should be guilty too.

But if revenge from VOSOD is that possible, why do politicians get away with so much atrocities they commit?

Welcome back sisterfire

Thanks guys for your contributions. I went to market with the Redmi 9t in mind but the cheapest I got it was 70900 so I finally settled for galaxy a12 at 65k.

I was ment to understand that the poco m3 was not shipped to Nigeria by xiaomi so even if I get it online it won't have any guarantees

Emmanueleko:
Redmi 9c or nothing else

What's your experience with the phone

BrickDevo:
Still Available?

50k. Serious buyer

JenniferEkubo:
give me your WhatsApp number.. I have someone that wants to sell his redmi note 9s for 65k.. But u guys can negotiate..

08033429009

FryMosquito:
It's also a nice phone, but I will advice you up ur budget to get the Poco M3 which is also a Xiaomi sub-brand or the Redmi 9t. With this you will not think of changing phone for a long time

I've narrowed my choice to either poco m3 or galaxy a12. Which of them do you recommend?

WeNoGoDie:
This phone still has no fast charging and costs much more than the Samsung I recommended for you earlier.

Anyways, I want to respect your choice.

The thing is, I've touched that Samsung, it just feels like a dummy phone; toil. Like a box of plastic with screen

Gideon890:
S.A

If you're selling 60k let me know

FryMosquito:
It's for new one.. If not for our economy that is affecting our naira exchange, this phone is about $120

Please how good is redmi 9c 4/64? It was offered to me for 56k

FryMosquito:
You can get it here on Nairaland Xiaomi thread store https://www.nairaland.com/3880817/xiaomi-thread-store/1118. Reliable sellers are there like Macbeyland. Or you can check physical stores like Slot, pointek, Raya in ur location.

Genius43 help, he looking for reliable seller of Poco M3 smartphone

Thanks. I'll check it out

Lovelynife:
3 days Xiaomi poco M3 for sale with all accessories intact in ibadan. it is 4g Ram 128g Rom..

Serious buyer. Price and location?

drawnobet:
Pristine Prism Crush Black Samsung A31 for sale.

128GB/4GB RAM

Always had pouch and screen cover on. To be sold with the Gold pouch, transparent back cover, and everything in the box except the earpiece. The receipt is available for you to view and is in the pics.

70k

Whatsapp: 08136074342

Location: Surulere

50k. Cash at hand

Androlee:
Still Available

50k. Serious buyer

Meister:
Poco M3 is no longer in the market. That your price won't get you what you want brand new, impossible

Even 60k? Please recommend something

FryMosquito:
It's for new one.. If not for our economy that is affecting our naira exchange, this phone is about $120

Do you have any link where I can get it?

FryMosquito:
Both are very nice from reliable brands.

The price you quoted for the m3, is it for a new one or fairly used?

FryMosquito:
Better stretch ur budget a bit as adviced, you can get Xiaomi Poco M3 for 60K. Check for reputable sellers for Xiaomi thread store. The phone over pass all you want 6000mah 4/64GB

Peace of mind matters from a reliable brand

Between this poco m3 and Samsung a12, which one is better?

WeNoGoDie:
Lol!! You can never get a phone that has all that at the price you mentioned. Except of course the clean used ones or you increase your budget to get brand new that has it all.

Can 55k get it? I didn't want to look in the tent of tecno and infinix, but it seems I will have to

WeNoGoDie:
You're in luck. I just searched Jumia and surprisingly found a Brand new Samsung that precisely fits into your request. Check it out Samsung A02:

https://www./samsung-galaxy-a02-364gb-memory-triple-rear-camera-dual-sim-5000mah-battery-4g-lte-black-71477399.html

There's also similarly priced Infinix hot 10 play and Nokia 2.4 on Jumia and all brand new. Tecno Spark 5 pro too.

So search and enjoy.

This Samsung phone doesn't have fingerprint; doesn't have fast charger

WeNoGoDie:
Ok. Your choice is respected. But if you have deep knowledge about mobile phones, then its best to go for very clean used high quality used phones than a brand new low quality.

My only concern is battery. Most times replacement batteries don't perform like the follow come. If you purchase a phone from a heavy user, you're bound to replace the battery

WeNoGoDie:
Search for clean used Redmi 8 or 9. You can even get 4Gb/64 at that price.

I don't want used, I can even go for less quality brands as far as they're new

Please guys help me

Budget: 50k
Ram: 3gb
ROM: 32gb or above
Battery: 5000mah and above with fast charger
Fingerprint: yes
OS: Android 11

Can I get this phone, gurus?

[quote author=chikizzy post=101483326][/quote]Do you have redmi 9 3/32? How much is it?

Amatarasha:
Uncleck holla @ u, Do you Know the pictures of ur dreams?

Truth is, I don't really give attention to dreams. I dream almost everyday, but I forget them as fast as they come. I dream about virtually everything. Sometimes they could be petrifying but I just brush them off once I wake up

Court will be your best bet. But it will linger

What happened to this thread?

Candycrushy:
Whatever.... I ain't changing shit