₦airaland Forum

@Brownjay
Theres some 24 years old that are ready in mind ie.This one has fears and its not good for her I think shes seen and heard too many negatives so a positive outlook from a positive woman may help her overcome. But its still her choice you know.Now she needs to tell her fiancee to give her tyme then.
I think you guys are also putting pressure on your women.If she gets to 28 b4 marriage you say shes too old
if she gets married at 24 then shes too young,

May God help you here.

^^^^ 
Go read Romeo and Juliet !!
You look so unloved in ur profile pic

Now my new defination of love is this;

LOVE = DEATH

Best example is JC. You wanna die FALL IN LOVE!! I warned you already.
So oladapo did I answer you

@ elampiro
We all use the word fall me included but I just choose to look deeper cz of the threads we read.
Seriously the reason I prefer to view it from the growth side is cz you take your time to really know smbdy.Lyke the way a flower grows. You meet u get impressed and that is a seed already.Nxt is to nurture it till maturity and hopefully it wl lead to marriage. 'Fall' to me means overlooking so many key factors at the start cz your sort of blinded by wht u see. The next thing your crying cz your discovering things u nver knew your partner harboured.You know those things that we later cry about.Its i meet you,I love you and I go saying we are in love after day 1 day of meeting.
Its just this crazy mind of mine that that sees things in a diffrent way.But yeah u v gt a point.

@chi

Love is a choice. Not forced.

Yeah you all go ahead and FALL,get hurt/broken, then come to NL crying abt how her eating embarrases you,how you cant love her anymore cz she's put on weight, how your breaking your engagement cz she dint disclose she had a scar on her butt,or how his sense of fashion sucks. etc
Why cant u just GROW IN LOVE and stay AFLOAT as smbody said.
Cant u see tht falling is to drop??.  you trip lose balance and drop.
FALL=DROP
GROW= Increase in size

For God so loved.He dint fall!!

but i wonder really.Why is it soo hard 4 some guys to make simple decisions even when the answer keeps tapping them over and over.
.

^^^^ No.Only to the pervert
Many things would draw me closer to smbody.
Like the brain.I get attracted by smbody's intelligence.Then love may grow thereafter.
A man may get attracted to a womans physical beauty.Now that is not lust.Thts very very normal.
Lust is when you see nothing else but how you can get her to have sex with you.
So when you finaly satisfy your lust you go cz it wasnt emotional at all. Love is emotional you know.

^^^^^ NO I dont think so
lust introduces sex not love. And we all know that sex is not love.ok
I know wht your thinking tht u you can only start loving after lusting first
Once lust (sex) is fulfilled it takes off. Love doesnt.

Jesus Christ. R u serious?
Marriage?? Its not a movie my dear its very practical!
I would expect such a question from a teenager for real but if you have all these fears my dear,put a PAUSE' and try to understand what ur getting into.
Do you have married female friends/reltives that you can talk to?
cz Its like going to the university without a clue on the course you are going to study.
Get to sit with your Aunt or a trusted female and let her tell you what a woman is and her role in marriage plus dont go to those who talk ill of marriages.
Talk to positive people.
Note this: Marriage is a journey.You dont have a full picture yet but you enter praying it works out and that you will get to the end of the journey.
Dont get ulcers b4 u even start.

Everybody here just described the meaning of love based on their own experiences which to say the truth falls below the standard of the Author of love and the best example of true love.

Some  fell in love -sorry you shouldnt have, you ought to have grown in it
Some made moves when all they felt was puppy love/infatuation- 'sorry it doesnt last or stand the  test of time.

You want to know what real love is? its God himself.Whethr you belive in Him or not.
Love gives,doesnt take away.lovers covers our sins,love sacrifices,love endures so many things.
True love must be tested by fire. Problem with us we avoid the fire.
So chi,dont give up on love cz smbody let you down. Put your love to test always.You have the best example up there.

@ Da Doc lol

Now what is the problem with an old mama. We all know tht men are looking for gals to play mama anyway so why not cut the story short and grab yourself a hot mama
Seriously if I was a dude and I found a nice loving caring gentle woman that I can share my life with I wouldnt turn her down.Now who even lied to you that a hot young chick cant cheat on you with somebody as old as your father?It hapens all the time so if you dont satisfy her well? another 'macho' dude will show up and prove u useless
So sad but the truth.
Now Da Doc get me young dude. Am past post menopause so I dont evn know wht u would call that stage.I just need comfort and love
Good luck to yo all lol

Its not the way we address that proves we respect them or not.
So the title isnt properly framed I think.
I could very easily say 'yes sir with an Attitude lol and roll my eyes you know. Thts so direspectful.
I sir my boss cz theres nothing romantic btwn us (office etiqutte).But I honey my hubby cz hes supposed to be my honey.
some men want to hear.yes lord,others,yes honey ,while some yes sir as proof of respect. If Yes Sir Lord means respect for you use it.If its yes chipmonkey,then use it.  and soothe each others ego Whatevr.
love and respect/intertwined. mmh.

@peanut

That which you refer to is called AGAPE love
Shes talking about EROS or Romantic love

I am not going to mince my words here since you want an honest opinion.

1. Colour is not human,it has no heart, no personality NOTHING! thts why women/men bleach but character remains the same!
2. Are you searching for colour or wife?? If I paint myself black/white,will u marry me? even though my character sucks??
3. Yes the environment influences our beliefs,culture and even the way we behave.
   Note: The nice cultured black gal may exhibit good traits cz shes not been exposed to the REAL WORLD. 3 things cud happen if u take her to the city.

@ continue being the villager she is( u cn take a man out of the village but nt take the village out of the man)
@ Out of shock she may want to ape the western culture since it looks very attractive. Sooner or later you dont matter anymore
@ She may balance the 2 with ur help and you will nt regret evr marrying her.

When ur cuz told u we are the same he knw wht he was tlking abt.
@ A white/green/blue woman can cook as well as a black
@ Awhite/grey/pink woman can carry baby 9 mnths and give birth just as the black
@ A short/slender/plump white woman can just be as unfaithful as the black short slender woman

My advice? Dont marry the cover,marry what is inside the cover.

It lasts longer.

^^^^
you know if we put our relationships thru tests and fire then we shall reduce the no of complains we read daily. if for instance you got shocked by ur partner fighting and shouting in public yet uv dated 5 yrs.It means all uv been seeing is fake cz that shouting virus has been dormant in her waiting 4 the rght tyme to explode. Wld hv been good if u had provoked her b4 in private to get hs or her reaction b4 ur publicly embarrased.

Jesus Christ now what again.

Office/business etiquitte is soo different from Romance.
Try that office stuff on each other and Romance flies out the window.
I wont even say sir to my hubby .I say yes honey,sweetheart ,anything romantic but sir!!
My hubby must be treated/talked to diffrently from my boss.
waa!

your poll question is hard.
Theres people that are as hard as tortoise shell.
So hard even God himself almost surrenders
They refuse to grow in love/be loved very difficult and cold. you dont want t be around them. so not evrybody grows in love cz you must allow your heart to love and be loved

@ Tell wisdom

your english I cant decode.when you say 'love na tree ' is it 'love a tree? or what?
LOVE NA BED WEY U WAN FALL INSIDE??

what u describe is the beginning of the growth am talking about in is initial stages.so we bsically mean the same thing.


@ Chi

Oh i so believe in love, that love btwn 2 people you know the kind that makes you look at a frog and see the Knight in shining armour instead.
The love that makes you feel like jumping off the cliff coz the guy asked you to do so
Yes Love exists and its real for sure.
To engage me you must have met me and become my friend first .Then that attraction starts coming cz you impress me.It grows as we move along.
From a small seedling to a Baobab tree called marriage.You must nurture it.Thts why I said it grows otherwise u stop nurturing,it shrinks and dies.
Oh I so want to be in love.How does it feel?

^^^ cool

With the quantity of kisses flowing left right center on NL I wldnt want kisses to strt blowing from my own gender u knw.
Tht is the only thing tht could paralyze me in this world.

@dyt!

u made me delete tht compliment cz it may mean smthing else to some people. Good lord.
Shes like my small sis really but see, if a woman tells another shes pretty then pple srt thinking silly things u knw.

yes i do for 2 big reasons

1. When you love you give. its evident and my reason for living.
2. Love covers multitude of weaknesses/.The reason we are able to live together in this crazy world.

You dont fall in love,you grow in love. People that fall in luv trip coz what they felt was 'puppy love' not 'dog (mature) love'
Now that growing in love is such a process you need lots of grace lol
cheers.

Now young man,Theres just too much going on around you.Its like a web no wonder you are confused.
All these people 'prophecying death,barreness,widowhood, WHY ON EARTH DO YOU LET THEM SPEAK DEATH INTO YOUR FUTURE LIFE??
you sound like a believer so read and believe that Bible The promises God has promised you and stop listening to prophets of doom
What God hs blessed no man can curse.Get rid of extra baggage and try to narrow your mind to 3 people ie her mum and both of you.
Fibroids are surgically removed unless they affected her uterus and therefore caused the uterus to be removed. i hope its nt the case.
If your both mature am sure you can resolve this together then approach the mom as 1.
God help u.

^^^^
Now you just opened a can of worms by calling them 'that' then you invite me to play spectator?
Play safe and dont mention names especially if you are on attack mode.
I actually disapper when the attacks start and come back after ceasefire cz I dont get soo personal with comments. Why should I? Theres a way to detach yourself from the comment so that you allow somebody to attack the post and not you as an individual, Unless you allow them to do so.
And if somebody gets that personal so what? must I answer back really. You can diffuse tension when its starts bulding .Take off or dont add more insult to injury.
And if the comments dont please anybody always rember this.Its just a public forum full of people with diffrent opinions.If you post something and you dont get bth negative and positive reactions then its not a healthy discussion.

well well Doc,

You want my answer?
OLD IS GOLD. lol
An old widow made headlines by marrying a young man of 22 years!in my country of course.
Guess what, the whole nation laughed and mocked the whole thing for months and all negatives that could be said was said.
As I post this they just celebrated their 9th wedding anniversary.
They are soo happy ,fulfilled and in love .(dont stone, dont stone, pliz I love NL)
She just needed company not kids as such.
The family embraced the young husband
Now in btwn thre has been a million and one 'proper marriages' most ending in murder,divorce,separation, etc
That made me think 'Age aint nothing but a number.
If you love smbody and you are compatible so what?? its your life anyway enjoy it the best way you can.No qualms for me.

Gone to hide now from mob justice.

Women!! did u hear what Harakiri just said?
Defend youselves. The cert is a bondage you say? 
Now the only way to claim anything is to have the cert no wonder the rush maybe.
Am trying to check this from the beginning of your love story when your all lovely dovey and stuff.
Did she/he pass the tests before you approved shes quality standard 4 marriage?
In that way you reduce the chances of divorce and btter still get rid of 'prenup mentality' (Dont stone pliz let me enjoy the forum

still here?? He already said hes made up his mind like 99 years ago.He is not marrying her
A man has made up his mind so no amount of mediation,intercession,visitation can make him think otherwise.
You all just get ready to console some broken hearted gal this week on NL.
And poster pliz be gentle when breakin such news now tht u had gone tht far.The humiliation will be too much 4 her to bear.
Shes still human anyway so if ur gonna do it, be gentle dont spit it on her face!!She will never lie again.

Mary mother of jesus.I all along though you were female
Okay bck to topic.
What is the best perserverance test you could put your partner thru?
And dont be naughty pliz.

Jeez!! whats up with you guys??
Now chima am even more confused.
You are Mrs but your read male!! and you sound 'malish'
I know you are female are u??

But seriously I really would likw to knw if we evr 'test' not 'taste' our potential future partners.
eg Test 4 honesty - leave your wallet with some dollars on the table and pretending you dint notice.
Wait and see if youl find the exact amount a day later.
Test 4 faithfulness -  see if she can be seduced easily by another dude.
Anger- provoke her in public
yeah smthing like that

@ Cork


NO  HE DIVORCED ME!! 

@ chima lol.thank u 4 hating him on my behalf
Now chima please help me unravel the mystery behind your profile pic.
It cannot be defined lol

@ okpara ugo.

thats life anyway.

.@ Da Doc,

Oh so you read it already ok.good lesson.
Thank you 4 the good compliment. But am no soyinka or anything close.
Theres hope anyway

@ Da Doctor,

Ok I get u now.