₦airaland Forum

It's better she finds all means to convince her father. If he refuses, then she should drop the idea. At times, parents/older people see what children do not see. And in the long run, she'll realise that her father's decision is best for her. Pleasing/obeying him now is more improtant than GUS. When she's out of school and more independent then she can do all she likes.

Is he still bossom-feeding? If yes, then until you wean him, he may not like to take any other thing even though the breast milk can not fill him any longer.

Instead of baby foods, try giving him the meals you eat. Rice, yam, eggs, beans, pap, etc. Start with small quantities and don't make it seem like a chore, I mean don't give him forcefully. Make it fun. You may tell him to feed you, and you too will say you'll feed him, you know something like that.

Kids can make a lot of fuss when it comes to feeding, especially toddlers. But there is no problem if the child is not losing weight or looking emaciated. To ensure this, let him take plenty of fluid.

Don't worry, he'll be fine.

How old is she?

You make your writing appear less important by using so many short forms. And it also makes the writer appear a bit unserious. Why type 'finking' instead of 'thinking'? What stops you from typing 'the' in place of 'tha' that you typed, it's the same 3 letters. Why gr8 instead of 'great'.

Such writing style removes the beauty from your writing no matter how rich your content is. Asalam alaykum.

It'd be good if the men will actually spend the leave at home, helping the wife. In Nigeria, most men won't. Was discussing this same topic with a male colleague at work and he was saying how unfair it is on men not to get paternal leave. I inquired what he'll be doing at home if granted such. He looked at me in awe, and said 'at home ke! How can I spend my leave sitting at home with a whining baby? It'll be an opportunity to go make some extra runs now!'

So see? Many Nigerian men don't need the leave anyway, because they won't even use it for what it's meant for.

About Babies Crying, Do Everything For Giving Happiness Incessantly. (ABCDEFGHI)

Wa alaykum salam, Mac. I've always been around.

Darch: What is wrong with all these women? What did the OP do wrong? The young man is only 5yrs older than the girl and y'all are making it sound like he's a p.edophile!

He met the gal while he was still in school and wanted to 'marry' her. Get that right. He didnt want to 'play' around with her,hence telling his friends he has seen his future wife.

Now the said future wife slept around with another professor,AFTER being engaged to the young man,and all u ladies have to offer him as advice are rude words? Incredible!

Bro i understand you. Just let her go no matter how difficult it is,cos u may never trust her again. Move on with your life.

Thank you. My thoughts exactly.

Your daughter will stay long in your house. Lol

How about side effects of neo medrol? A pharmacist was saying it should be used sparingly because of its active agents. Does it have any short or long term side effects if use is prolonged?

I'll go with tbaba on this one. Too tired to bring up more evidences but I do know it's safer and better to not touch the quran while menstruating and the likes. But there's the opinion that if one is a student and has to hold the mushaf compulsorily to learn, then this is allowed. Allahu a'laam

For sahur, mostly swallows. Iftar, plenty of fruits and water, then regular meals like rice, beans, yam and eggs/stew etc. Pap and akara goes in-between. Most times, by the time I'm done taking pap and akara and loads of fruits, I don't get to eat the main meals again.

Don't know if this only happens with people around me or in my environment, there's usually this mad rush for food, to stock up the house in prep for Ramadhan. I then wonder, it's fasting period. Isn't this the time we should be less bothered about stocking up? I discussed this with someone today and his response was that he likes to stock up in prep for Ramadhan because he wants to remove the stress of going to the markets in Ramadhan, that more time is needed for Ibaadah. Well, I'd like to hear/read other opinions.


Hope I'm not derailing @deols

You're right OP. Breakfast is very important, even for adults. It doesn't have to be heavy. Just nutritious.

@Tochiphotos. Thanks for the answer. You mentioned that taking photos of people is allowed anywhere? By who? Personally, I'd be mad(to say the least) at any random photographer taking snap shots of me or mine without my consent not to mention splashing it on any public space. Please tell me more. Photographers have this free license?

Did you get the consent of these kids' parents/guardians before putting their pictures online?

And you too feel like gossiping?

Subscribing

Rather hang than read a book?

Category: Monday column Published on Monday, 15 April 2013 17:01 Written by Mahmud JegaSharI was intrigued by the story last week that a 13 year old Nigerian boy committed suicide in Ibadan rather than sit down to read his books.

Oyo State Police Command spokesman DSP Olabisi Clet-Ilobanafor said the boy hanged himself at 6.15 p.m. on March 31 because his father’s friend told him to go and read his books. Now, I know that reading books is out of fashion in today’s Nigeria, but I never imagined that death is preferable to reading a book. It is bad enough that today, uncles must goad pupils and students to sit in corridors and read books. Thirty years ago, as youngsters in this same country, we had no alternative but to read books and novels because we didn’t have video machines, CDs, cable television, internet, blackberries or social networking sites.

Primary school teachers pushed us to read some of our earliest vernacular books such as Ka Koyi Karatu, Ka Kara Karatu, Kayi Ta Karatu and Karamin Sani Kukumi Ne. But once we learnt the art, we mostly took off on our own. No teacher or uncle told me to read 3 volumes of Magana Jari Ce, Labarun Da Dana Yanzu, Ruwan Bagaja, Gandoki, Umar Mukhtar, Mungo Park Mabudin Kwara, Tafiya Mabudin Ilmi, Tarihin Annabi, Uwar Gulma, Jatau Na Kyallu, Iliya Dan Maikarfi, Yawon Duniyar Haji Baba, Sauna Jac, Jagoran Mai Sallah and Ibada da Hukunci.
I started reading newspapers in primary school without any teacher’s prompting. Every afternoon, I sat in the driveway and waited for my father to come home because he always brought with him New Nigerian, Daily Times, Sketch, Tribune, Observer, Chronicle, Herald, Standard and Lagos Weekend. I read them and then cut out the pictures of governors and commissioners, which I pasted onto a notebook. As a result, I knew every Federal and almost every state commissioner in Nigeria during the Gowon era. This served me well in 1997 when our managing director at New Nigerian Newspapers, Prof Abubakar Rasheed, called me and said Chief Sunday Awoniyi phoned to say that an important Nigerian, Chief Gilbert Obatoyinbo, had just died. I said, “The former SMG of Kwara State?” The MD said, “How did you know him?” I said, “I cut his picture from Nigerian Herald in 1974.”
Right from primary school I was reading magazines such as Drum, Spear, Topic, Dialogue, Time, Newsweek, London Weekend, Reader’s Digest, National Geographic, China Pictorial, Soviet Military Review, Woman’s Own and later West Africa and Africa. Every Friday, without any uncle’s prompting, I went to Sokoto’s Yardole market to buy cartoon magazines [comics as we called them] such as Lance Spearman, Sadness and Joy, Fearless Fang, Boom, Jane, Bobo Bunny, June and Football. These served me well during a visit to the US in 1994 when my host’s talkative son began telling a story about the Royal Air Force’s fighter plane of World War Two, the Spitfire. I asked him about Spitfire’s German rival, but he didn’t know. It was the Messerschmitt; I read about the planes’ rivalry in a comic book in 1971.
In secondary school we read James Hadley Chase titles without any prompting. I didn’t read all of them, only 40, including The Vulture is a Patient Bird, You Never Know With Women, The Things Men Do, Tiger By The Tail, A Lotus for Miss Quon and The Way the Cookie Crumbles. From Chase we learnt about description, clever crime plotting, painstaking police investigation and American ghetto slang. We also learnt about some problems many decades before they arrived here, such as the problem of parking space. I read only a few Nick Carter and Denise Robbins novels but in order to know how things work I read Arthur Hailey’s books The Final Diagnosis, In High Places, Overload, Hotel, Airport, Wheels and The Money Changers without an uncle’s goading. From Frederick Forsyth I read only Day of the Jackal, Dogs of War and Devil’s Alternative, but my brothers and I bought and read dozens of other novels and books including The R Document, Papillon, Jaws, Best and Brightest, The Powers That Be, The Fifth Horseman, Red Star Over China and Shall We Tell the President?

Without anyone’s prompting, I studied the map of the world until I knew every country, island, lake, big river or inland sea. This served me well in 1976 when NTA Sokoto started a weekly quiz program ran by the late Sa’adu Haruna Gobir. One of his favourite questions was, “Name all the countries that share a border with such-and-such country.” I kept winning the N30 cash prize for weeks on end. One day, some young boys accosted me in a park and alleged that Sa’adu Haruna leaked the quiz questions to me, so I asked them to name any country they wanted. One said “India” so I said, “Arabian Sea, Pakistan, Nepal, Bhutan, China, Bangladesh, Burma and Indian Ocean.” The boy ran to his house to check an atlas. He never came back.
 
As a science student no one told me to read African Writers Series but I read at least 30 of them. As we grew older, we abandoned novels and turned to biographies of great people. No uncle goaded me to read Sardauna’s My Life, Azikiwe’s My Odyssey, Awolowo’s Awo or the biographies of Aminu Kano, Kwame Nkrumah, Amilcar Cabral, Julius Nyerere, Kenneth Kaunda, Franklin Roosevelt, Iosif Stalin, Adolf Hitler, Winston Churchill, Charles DeGaulle, Francisco Franco, Josif Broz Tito, Indira Gandhi, Malcolm X, Mao Zedong, Benito Mussolini, Chiang Kai-shek, Nelson Mandela, Gamal Abdel Nasser, Golda Meir, Moshe Dayan, the Shah, Douglas MacArthur, Dwight Eisenhower, Lord Montgomery, Harry Truman, John Kennedy, Richard Nixon, Al Capone, Howard Hughes, McGeorge Bundy and William Averell Harriman. In just one book, Sinews of American Capitalism, I read the stories of John Rockefeller, Andrew Carnegie, John Pierpont Morgan and Andrew Mellon.
I wasn’t goaded by an uncle either to read many books about the Nigerian Civil War, including John de St. Jorre’s The Nigerian Civil War, Eddie Iroh’s 48 Guns for the General, Toads of War and Siren in the Night; Alexander Madiebo’s Biafran Revolution and Nigerian Civil War, Elechi Amadi’s Sunset in Biafra, Bernard Odogwu’s No Place to Hide, Chukwuemeka Ike’s Sunset At Dawn, Nelson Ottah’s Rebels Against Rebels, Obasanjo’s My Command and many smaller books. Without prompting I took to reading books about the Second World War, such as A Bridge Too Far, Auschwitz, the hunt for Martin Bormann, books about Reinhard Heydrich and Heinrich Himmler, and books about German Field Marshals Erwin Rommel, Franz Halder, Gerd von Rundstedt and Freidrich Paulus. I then read General Sergei Shtemenko’s Soviet General Staff at War and the two volume Memoirs of Marshal Georgi Zhukov, followed by books on Soviet Marshals Semyon Timoshenko, Kliment Voroshilov and Konstantin Rukossovsky.
Two of the three fattest books I ever read, without goading, were on the Second World War, namely William Shirer’s The Rise and Fall of the Third Reich [which I read many times] and David Bergamini’s Japan’s Imperial Conspiracy, which I read repeatedly. The third fat book was Bertrand Russell’s History of Western Philosophy. Following from the first two, I read smaller books about Battle of Britain, Operation Barbarossa, Battle of Stalingrad, Operation Overlord, Battle of the Bulge, Pearl Harbour and the naval battles of Midway, Coral Sea, Corregidor and Wake Island. No uncle ordered me to read them.  
When I developed an interest in the Watergate scandal, without any uncle’s prompting I read The Final Days and All the President’s Men by Carl Bernstein and Bob Woodward; G. Gordon Liddy’s Will; John Dean’s Blind Ambition; John Ehrlichman’s Witness to Power; Henry Kissinger’s White House Years and Years of Crises; Richard Nixon’s Memoirs as well as many smaller books. Let me not mention here all the books and pamphlets by Karl Marx, Engels, Lenin and Mao that we read as young Communists. I haven’t mentioned any compulsory school textbooks either. So, today’s youngsters, please learn to read one book a week. It is more worthwhile than hanging by the neck.

I was expecting more @tbaba.

@mac
Why not? It's not as if you'll be telling them everything. But it's very ok to talk to kids about marriage. 11yrs is even high. My daughter of 4.8yrs returned from school recently and started explaining to me the difference between a monogamous and polygamous marriage. I was astounded, not only because of the intelligence she displayed in differentiating and explaining but also at the fact that they're been taught such at that age.

An 11year old girl was discussing with me. She told me with so much determination the kind of man she'd like to marry and the kind of marriage she wants. She added that she'd ensure she marries someone that'll be her best friend. At that age, I didn't know anything about marriage not to mention things I want and don't want in marriage.

If you think your child is still too young to be taught these things, they'll learn (at times wrongly) from the media and their peers outside. So it's better to come to their level, interact much with them, be their friends' friend, discuss with them as much as is necessary without stirring up the wrong instincts in them. This is when you as a parent can have a peace of mind as regards your children.

^^ what's the definition of cheating?

Both did equally.

What is it with all these farewell messages and coming back soon after. If anyone wants to leave the forum, you can quietly do so without announcement. It's a personal resolve. What is the purpose of this thread? To have people beg you to stay back?

You have impacted well here and I have gained much from your posts. Deciding to leave is a personal thing and for anyone to make that decision then they should stick by it and not wait for some people to beg them to come back and then they do come back. Why announce that you'll leave at all in the first place?

I love both! No preferences. Each should come at the right time. Inability to menstruate is a problem, not getting pregnant is trouble. If you encounter people who have problem with menstruation or can't get pregnant, they'll tell you they don't mind all the associated wahala! If others can cope, they can too. That's what they'll tell you.

I thank God for making me a woman, and giving me the strength and all it takes to LIVE a complete woman.

Ooops! 100page already.

Someone was saying something about celebrating the 100th page with nikkah. Oya o singles, ewo le se?

I used to wonder too. Before I finish the 2nd verse in surah fatiha, the imam is already in ruku, even the ruku and sujud, its as if they don't say anything at all. I once asked the question at a halqa, is one's prayer complete and acceptable if been unfortunate enough to pray behind such imams, and how can they be corrected? I was told the prayer is valid but correcting an imam especially elderly men requires a lot of tact and could even lead to wahala.

It's been long I prayed behind an imam now. I pray at my own pace.

Alhamdulilah

@deols
Laa ba'sa tahuurun in sha Allah.

@hadizadeezy
Asalam alaykum. Please try writing properly for ease of reading and comprehension. This text type of yours makes it a bit difficult to read and understand you.

Barka jum'a

Oh I see.

But this does not still justify covering up indoors. The ayah of hijab is clear in the quran.
May Allah continue to guide us.

While in school, I had two friends who held this view. Whenever they wanted to pray they'd insist I used a scarf over my head/hair. I always told them to bring proof but they couldn't.

Now, I have this hajia as a friend, she wears niqqab ma sha Allah but while indoors, she is always wearing hijab. I often wondered why she wears hijab inside her house, even inside her own room, but I didn't ask her since we aren't so close. Then she visited me a couple of times and one day started admonishing me on the importance of covering the hair, chest and shoulders indoors! Initially I was like wow! How come I've not come across this info before through reading or from lectures. Well, I asked hajia to give me evidences from the authentic sunnah and I'll begin to do as she said. It's over. 6 months now and she's yet to bring a single evidence for me.

When I asked her recently, she said she and her hubby are still searching. I asked who told her to be doing so in the 1st place, she said their ustaz. I told her I won't do it until I have clear proof. Then she began to say it's even good to cover indoors in order to teach our little girls how a muslimah should dress. Can you imagine such excuse? As if the girls don't see us well-dressed while going out.
Initially she said angels won't enter my house if I don't wear hijab indoors, now that we can't find proof for that, it's talk about teaching our girls.

How can I cover outside and still cover indoors? What and when will I be dazzling MrZayhal naa?

Islam is easy if only we will take a middle course, neither lapsing nor going to the extreme.

I'm in.

What amuses me is that @OP says he also switches his lights on because he sees the lights of some cars switched on. Nigerians with their attitude of follow follow without genuine reason.

Anyway, you've heard it all. The lights you see on those car come on by default. So stop putting yours on except there's need for it.

Another thing is all these guys pointing to your lights as you drive by, some telling you to switch off, some will even get angry and insult you because of the lights. How many people will you stop to explain to that that's how the car is?

Mean people are difficult to relate with but getting to know them deep could be fun.