It is now gradually becoming a norm that ladies should do house chores for their fiance (all in the name of after all we are gonna get married soon).
I mean stuffs like sweeping the entire compound, cooking, washing clothes on visits and lots more.
Some say it‘s wrong because too much intimacy might breed iniquity.
Some say it‘s right cos you need to test-run the capability of your soon-to-be wife.
Why i personally don‘t like this is that some men (including their family members) misuse/abuse this privilege.
What‘s your own take?

OCTAVO: It is now gradually becoming a norm that ladies should do house chores for their fiance (all in the name of after all we are gonna get married soon).
I mean stuffs like sweeping the entire compound, cooking, washing clothes on visits and lots more.
Some say it‘s wrong because too much intimacy might breed iniquity.
Some say it‘s right cos you need to test-run the capability of your soon-to-be wife.
Why i personally don‘t like this is that some men (including their family members) misuse/abuse this privilege.
What‘s your own take?

Fiance is quite a big deal in most part of the world you know,it means there is some seriousness to get married. They may as well start showing each other their abilities to take responsibility with regards to their various functions. Fear of abuse should really not deter you from performing what you believe is your duty (male or female) as abuse exists for jerks even after marriage.

what do you mean by abuse?

Even if u wash his clothes,clean his crib,scrub his dead bathtub 2life,pound yam,b at his beck and call24/7.u might not get a ring!say no 2 slavery

If you're going to be wife then it's normal to start showing how wifely you can be before marriage.

Temi 23: Even if u wash his clothes,clean his crib,scrub his dead bathtub 2life,pound yam,b at his beck and call24/7.u might not get a ring!say no 2 slavery

perhaps i should get another secret girlfriend to do my house chores when i need help and keep my fiance away from doing them until we get married.

how does two lovers complimenting and helping each other since they are sure of being together in future turns to be slavery?

the problem with ur type is that u cant differentiate a relationship the is built on love and the one that is not built on love.

The fiance and fiancee should do the house chores together...That will bring in more bonding between them but if only the woman does all the work and the man is relaxing and watching football then i will call it BONDAGE.

Temi 23: Even if u wash his clothes,clean his crib,scrub his dead bathtub 2life,pound yam,b at his beck and call24/7.u might not get a ring!say no 2 slavery

Ode!

No you shouldn't. marry him neither. When he marries another gal who got his attention by doing this lil things u ll still come back here and start another thread "he dumped me for another gal because of house chores",then posters like mrs chima and the other small gals will come and tell u how he aint worth it and find another opportunity to bash Naija men, face it "we are Africans" we hv got culture. You still got the option of going to the convent.

OCTAVO: It is now gradually becoming a norm that ladies should do house chores for their fiance (all in the name of after all we are gonna get married soon).
I mean stuffs like sweeping the entire compound, cooking, washing clothes on visits and lots more.
Some say it‘s wrong because too much intimacy might breed iniquity.
Some say it‘s right cos you need to test-run the capability of your soon-to-be wife.
Why i personally don‘t like this is that some men (including their family members) misuse/abuse this privilege.
What‘s your own take?

hope u wll not be offended if another lady is doing it for u?

Unserious question from unserious person.

If you have a great relationship with a man that you know is planning to marry you, what do you plan to do when you come during weekends. Sit around when dirt piles up in the house, and eat at Mr. Biggs?

Don't kid yourself that a lazy woman is going to suddenly pick up a broom and cook with enthusiasm as soon as she says 'I do'.

Also, a man that starts commanding you to do house chores is a red flag too.

Table Leg :

Ode!

Oloshi!! Wetin βε̲̣ ur own sef

And what about the women who do this chores under false pretence and the moment they are married they start to deviate. I'm not totally against women doing the chores for their fiance as that's how a man is going to find out if she's a wife material or not. Notwithstanding some people abuse this priviledge as aptly pointed out by the op, and to all intents and purposes I do not think it's sufficient enough in strictu sensu to abolish this process. It is by all odds sacrosanct.

3direct: what do you mean by abuse?

[color=#000099][/color]
Refer to your dictionary for the definition that suits my usage of the word ABUSE.

It amazes the kinda questions asked about relationship these days.
we got so called lovers trying to use their head too much thereby creating a wrong impression abt who they really are.
ok, u dont want to do the house chores but u want the man to send u money for hair do, replace ur worn out phone, worst of all have s*x with u.
if u wont assume any responsibility as a woman, dont also expect the man to.

djeezy: And what about the women who do this chores under false pretence and the moment they are married they start to deviate. I'm not totally against women doing the chores for their fiance as that's how a man is going to find out if she's a wife material or not. Notwithstanding some people abuse this priviledge as aptly pointed out by the op, and to all intents and purposes I do not think it's sufficient enough in strictu sensu to abolish this process. It is by all odds sacrosanct.

A million likes for you!

frank3.16:


perhaps i should get another secret girlfriend to do my house chores when i need help and keep my fiance away from doing them until we get married.

how does two lovers complimenting and helping each other since they are sure of being together in future turns to be slavery?

the problem with ur type is that u cant differentiate a relationship the is built on love and the one that is not built on love.

Don't mind the poster. Why should this even be an issue if not for a lazy woman. Not saying that you have to become a slave for the man, but small house chores should not be an issue for a couple that is intending to marry. You do it, I do it, we do it together...kini big deal.

You can just tell that the poster aint going to do any chores after she marries either.

Joey82: It amazes the kinda questions asked about relationship these days.
we got so called lovers trying to use their head too much thereby creating a wrong impression abt who they really are.
ok, u dont want to do the house chores but u want the man to send u money for hair do, replace ur worn out phone, worst of all have s*x with u.
if u wont assume any responsibility as a woman, dont also expect the man to.

so you mean doing house chores should be some form of pay back? SMH for you!

Before nko?!
Where's the abuse there and what manner of fiance still stays with parents...
So long there's no s.ex, she's home free. Those things are fun really. Both party are at their heights of pretence - NEAR PERFECT COUPLES!

djeezy: And what about the women who do this chores under false pretence and the moment they are married they start to deviate. I'm not totally against women doing the chores for their fiance as that's how a man is going to find out if she's a wife material or not. Notwithstanding some people abuse this priviledge as aptly pointed out by the op, and to all intents and purposes I do not think it's sufficient enough in strictu sensu to abolish this process. It is by all odds sacrosanct.

You cannot pretend forever. Unless you do not court for a long period of time. A lazy woman will tire of the house work soon enough. 6 mths is even too long. It's not about doing the work, it's about the attitude while doing it. If a woman doing it on false pretence will get irritable and pissed off soon enough. Then later run to Nairaland to ask for peoples opinions about whether to continue with the 'work'.

OCTAVO:
so you mean doing house chores should be some form of pay back? SMH for you!

OCTAVO:
so you mean doing house chores should be some form of pay back? SMH for you!

well if been responsible means some form of payback to you then i mean so.
keep shaking ur head.
if a woman cant do these little things in a r/ship, what else can she do.
Do u expect me to cook for her any time she visits?
or sleep while i scrub the floor and tidy the kitchen?
come on man, been doing all that in her absence and if i'll be doing it while she's around, what's the use of her been around?

I don't think she's under any obligation to do it but it's not a bad idea.
On one hand it helps all to see/know that she can take care of a home. on the other hand, a guy that consistently needs her fiancee's help to take care of dirty pile of plates in the kitchen, or regularly messy bathroom/bedroom is an indication that he is not able to stand alone without a woman. The wife should not complain if he refuses to lift a finger to assist her in house chores after marriage.

Anyway marriage is more than doing house chores o.

Atandav: hope u wll not be offended if another lady is doing it for u?

exactly what i want to ask her mtcheeeew

Joey82: It amazes the kinda questions asked about relationship these days.
we got so called lovers trying to use their head too much thereby creating a wrong impression abt who they really are.
ok, u dont want to do the house chores but u want the man to send u money for hair do, replace ur worn out phone, worst of all have s*x with u.
if u wont assume any responsibility as a woman, dont also expect the man to.

thanks u lazy bunch of ashenas

ypzilanti:

Don't mind the poster. Why should this even be an issue if not for a lazy woman. Not saying that you have to become a slave for the man, but small house chores should not be an issue for a couple that is intending to marry. You do it, I do it, we do it together...kini big deal.

You can just tell that the poster aint going to do any chores after she marries either.

she is just lazy thats all. its there type that dont fail to ask for money for up keeps smh

Joey82:
well if been responsible means some form of payback to you then i mean so.
keep shaking ur head.
if a woman cant do these little things in a r/ship, what else can she do.
Do u expect me to cook for her any time she visits?
or sleep while i scrub the floor and tidy the kitchen?
come on man, been doing all that in her absence and if i'll be doing it while she's around, what's the use of her been around?

Gbosa x3

Joey82:
well if been responsible means some form of payback to you then i mean so.
keep shaking ur head.
if a woman cant do these little things in a r/ship, what else can she do.
Do u expect me to cook for her any time she visits?
or sleep while i scrub the floor and tidy the kitchen?
come on man, been doing all that in her absence and if i'll be doing it while she's around, what's the use of her been around?

r

Poster is looking for validation for her lazy nature. A fiance is someone you love and want to marry. He loves you and wants to marry you too. If you get to his house and see the place in a mess, what would you do? If there is no food in the kitchen nko? You want to sit around? Sit around. Just know he is probably going to kick you to the curb soon enough.

Just as most women would leave a man they think is not capable of taking care of them financially, most men would leave a woman they think is not capable of taking care of their home. When he is paying for your money needs, you do not say 'don't do that until we get married'.

I tink d topic dat suit dis thread is "HOW CAN I AVIOD DOING HOUSE CHORES FOR MY FIANCE". 4rm what i've just read i tink d lady is lazy(no harm or abuse intended), there a wise saying which says the way 2 a man hearth is thru his belly i see no reason y u should avoid doing house chores esp. d cooking believe me or not if ur a jovial lady dat really love her man doing his house chore should b ur primary assignment.

Joey82:
well if been responsible means some form of payback to you then i mean so.
keep shaking ur head.
if a woman cant do these little things in a r/ship, what else can she do.
Do u expect me to cook for her any time she visits?
or sleep while i scrub the floor and tidy the kitchen?
come on man, been doing all that in her absence and if i'll be doing it while she's around, what's the use of her been around?

i guess she is just as lazy as the poster

God forbid, wot shud she be doing in M̶̲̥̅̊Ɣ house in the 1st place,M̶̲̥̅̊Ɣ church doctrine is against that...

If ur fiance Iڪ G̲̣̣̣̥o̲̣̥O̲̣̣̥ƌ̲̣̣̣̥, she Iڪ G̲̣̣̣̥o̲̣̥O̲̣̣̥ƌ̲̣̣̣̥...period

I am a lady and I think it is wrong and an act of desperation.
I know many people will abuse me and say all sorts of rubbish but I won't be offended because we are all entitled to our opinion.

Temi 23: Even if u wash his clothes,clean his crib,scrub his dead bathtub 2life,pound yam,b at his beck and call24/7.u might not get a ring!say no 2 slavery

Slavery in what light dearie.