Okija_juju:


[b]Any woman whose 'foremost asset' is her physical beauty is doomed..

Every woman wants to date a man that and fend and provide for her, TRUE!! Same way every man wants to truly be able to fend for and his family.. #Sadly, LIFE IS NOT ALWAYS AS WE WOULD LIKE IT TO BE...

Why most women in the past married Warriors was not necessarily for the protection, but also for the perks that came with marrying a Warrior. Warriors were like the Generals of those days. They enjoyed special previledges that commoners didnt.

You keep focusing on 'Broke'.. A wise woman focuses on potentials, not actual. A wealthy man does not automatically translate into a good relationship.. ASK SOON TO BE EX-FIRST LADY OF ENUGU.. MRS CHIME!!!
True happiness does not lie in wealth alone.. Focusing on wealth at the expense of other more important attributes would be a colossal mistake, ,just as a man focusing on Physical beauty at the expense of other more important attributes is tantamount to suicide.

Its indeed true that the natural law of attraction in place todays is;

Men want Pretty Women.
Women want Rich men.

Ever wondered why divorce rate today is astronomically high?!


Sadly, both wealth & Beauty are attributes that change with time and not always for the better..

Broke guys can aspire for anything.. But my advice to them is rather than daydream of landing a Kim.. Daydream of making money and creating their own Kims.. [/b]

DailyNews: You just summarized my advice to guys on this thread...but unfortunately, they saw it the other way...that has been my perspective...don't go chasing something that doesn't want you...instead make yourself that thing that will be desired and chased! I always wish I could turnaround things for my fellow guys, God knows I do...and I am not mocking anyone...very far from me...but I was only trying to make guys see reason why they won't get most of the girls they desire and go for....that's after reading a disheartening story of turn down a guy shared on a BBM group I belong to...I felt so touched and also felt like using nairaland as a medium to reach out to so may other guys out there....

Sadly, they all want my head down for trying to give them a head up and an inspiration to work harder in life

Lol!!


OKAY!!! Now I get you!!

You should know that Niggas are jumpy and cant read inbetween lines...

Next time be straight with your post.. Shit like this was what got one guy killed in 1935 before independence..

Okija_juju:

I dont get you..

So a girl should rather marry the present Jonathan rather than the old Jonathan?!


My guy!! Na wah to you o!!

You are simply encouraging gold digging.

What if a woman marries a dangote who makes a bad business investment that leaves him poor?! Can she leave him and move on?!


P.S:: You cant prove the highlighted.. Plus, I'm sure all the daughters of Lulu Briggs and Co would have been more than happy to be Mrs. Ebele Jonathan if they knew that he would one day become the Egberipapa 1 of Nigeria with over 10 jets at his disposal and an entire country and a sizable protion of a continent at his feet...

Okija_juju:


Lol!!


OKAY!!! Now I get you!!

You should know that Niggas are jumpy and cant read inbetween lines...

Next time be straight with your post.. Shit like this was what got one guy killed in 1935 before independence..

anselm791: All you've written here is how life's hard and unfair to men, I mean with the day dreaming, working hard like P square, paying for sex while all the women have to do is to be hot? Unless you were once a woman, you shouldn't be writing poo about what you don't know poo about.

ogugua88: My mother and I had this discussion just yesterday. I showed her a picture of a guy that was trying to get close to my sister and I. Her response? "Some guys don't date within their caliber." I was telling her, if I were a man, I'd evaluate myself inside and out and toast accordingly, for the girl I want should have no reason to reject me. I wouldn't be surprised if many of the guys who bash Naija women in this section are the lacking guys going for Kim Ks.

I've always wanted to open a thread for women to share their toasting experiences (but I haven't because I already know the result of such a thread). The kind of offers some of us get are ridiculous, and we're still made out to be witches. If I tell you I was asked out on a date by a homeless man at a train station, who would believe me? Yet it's true lol.

That's always been my motto anyway. If you want the best, then be the best and attract the best. A guy who is seriously trying to get a woman should give her no reason to say no. You don't have to be wealthy or even handsome. Just carry yourself well. If you're lacking in some areas, then make up for it elsewhere. You're not handsome? Then be compassionate. You don't have a job? Then put your skills to work and tell her your plans. No man or woman is without a flaw. Any man who puts his best foot forward can get the woman he desires. After all his attempts, if she says no, then the man isn't the problem.

Your post is a breath of fresh air, DN. Well done.

kadman:

You think it's easy to be hot? You think the fitness regime, beauty regime, weaves and wigs are FREE

Broke, bitter man.. that Sir, is what you are !

Okija_juju: So its okay for a guy to date a broke chick, but not vice versa...






Here is my take;

Life is full of hypocrisy, that’s why my motto in life is live life as best as you know how to.

Many people have come out with the saying 'Love has nothing to do with age or class', I guess they have never heard seen this post.
Like someone here asked, how does one judge their size in matters of the heart? I will take it further; can one comfortably predict their future sizes?! So let’s say that a guy later becomes filthy rich and the fortunes of his wife or partner goes down, can he dump her and go find a partner that fits into his current size?!

I grew up with the mentality that Money and material things were never part of the fundamentals of a relationship. I always thought that the pillar of every relationship was mutual love, respect and understanding. Sizes change. The street kid of today can become the president of tomorrow, ask Jonathan the shoeless son of a Bayelsa fisherman. My father is another classic example. Grew with nothing, struggled through school, met a woman whose class was out of his league. Infact, I learnt that my maternal grandfather refered to him as a ‘Pauper’ and was against the marriage. Infact, at their traditional wedding, My grandfather repaid my father all the money he spent saying ‘He would need it to feed his stupid daughter’. I learnt a few wealthy Igbo Business men were lining up for my mum then. After their traditional wedding, they both retired to the village. My mum told me of the first time my Grandfather came to see her at my Paternal grandfathers house, that he stopped his car at the entrance to the compound and wouldn’t enter because they were too poor for his taste. Infact he brought a bus load of foodstuff for my parents after he saw the state they were living in (with me just being born then). Today!! My mums younger brother who use to call my father my his first name now calls him ‘Uncle’. This same Grandfather called my father and apologised to him blaming it on his foolish pride.

In issues of the heart, I do not believe in ‘cutting coats to size’.

I know of a case where an Onitsha trader married this very beautiful Girl that he met as an under graduate. Her parents also resisted calling her husband a common trader. Her friends still tease her about her husbands ‘localness’, but the one undeniable fact that none of them can dispute is that the man adores and cherishes his wife more than anything in the world. The chick is living la vida loca.


To each his own... Note that the coat wey size you today, fit no be your size tomorrow..

_{Please guys, keep hustling hard.. If you are to take anything away from this thread, it would be to keep improving on yourself. Keep trying to 'upgrade your coat size & fabric quality"... Not for women, but for yourself.}

ogugua88:





DN, I think you struck a nerve lol.

INFO TECH:

Really! Harsh! The guy might not be broke, just bitter.

obyrich: So does this explain your homeless man analogy? Read the Op's write up well and you will see the implied cynicism. However, I agree totally with your explanation on personal improvement. Ogugua the major advantage of dating across one's social status is that it challenges one to excellence. You don't have to wait until you become made until you date a classy girl. Though it comes with a great challenge.

INFO TECH:

In as much as I agree that men should PROBABLY date within their circle, I don't think it is wrong to aim high in this life @ all.

Its we humans that created class amongst ourselves and I personally do not see anything wrong with a guy asking a lady out even if they are not in the same class. Its the guys' prerogative to ASK and it's the ladys' choice to agree or disagree.

Have you ever wondered that there are the Kim K's out there that just want a regular guy in thier lives and leave out all the drama.

I would personally like guys to date across class cos it's a trait that they can aim high in life to achieve in all they set out to. You have a right to say NO so it's definitely not by force.

You can't blame a guy for trying.

josite: I am even surprised she attributed the comments to her mum and in that instance she so much exposed her mum negatively.and this is the reason why most girls will still get the gov chime's treatment. I pray for the mum.

ogugua88:

I see nothing wrong with my mother as I absolutely agree with her. Like I said earlier, if I was a man, I would evaluate myself and toast accordingly. Numerous guys face rejection because they ask out any girl they see, often leaving the girl wondering if he has looked himself in the mirror lately. It may sound cruel, but that's how many women think, including myself. I carry myself well, so I think, no, I know that I deserve someone who carries himself well too. I have self-respect and respect others, so I deserve someone who respects himself and others as well. I have good hygiene and act on my best behavior, so I can demand the same from a man. There's absolutely no crime in that.

Ranchhoddas: if u say a guy should not aim for a girl like u because he is below par(homeless in the case u have given),would it be alright for a hypothetical brad pitt,peter okoye or whichever kind of star man catches your fancy to say that ogugua should not aim for such guys simply because she is beneath or they perceive her to be beneath them?...just asking!

ogugua88:

I see nothing wrong with my mother as I absolutely agree with her. Like I said earlier, if I was a man, I would evaluate myself and toast accordingly. Numerous guys face rejection because they ask out any girl they see, often leaving the girl wondering if he has looked himself in the mirror lately. It may sound cruel, but that's how many women think, including myself. I carry myself well, so I think, no, I know that I deserve someone who carries himself well too. I have self-respect and respect others, so I deserve someone who respects himself and others as well. I have good hygiene and act on my best behavior, so I can demand the same from a man. There's absolutely no crime in that.

GustavoFring: Honest question here and God knows I'm not dissing.

Do you really think that Sexkillz is good looking?


I ask this based on the criteria you've listed out there.

DailyNews: BEAUTIFUL!!! Ogugua you are intelligent! This is exactly what I was trying to advice guys- be what u would like to get and stop trying to cut corners.

How would u feel as a guy, u dressed up so fine, wore your best outfit, best wrist, and may put on some designers perf...and while strolling down the road feeling fly, one ugly, unkempt girl from nowhere just ran up to you and said: hello brother, I just saw you and fell in love with you, can u pls give me a chance to be your girlfriend, your love, and your everything

Guys, pls let's try and be realistic...life is unfair I know....but let's try....all hope isn't lost okay?

GustavoFring:

Honest question here and God knows I'm not dissing.

Do you really think that Sexkillz is good looking?


I ask this based on the criteria you've listed out there.

ogugua88:

Yes.
And my earlier comment isn't about face alone.

GustavoFring: Stu.pid Analogy.

So if a good looking girl from nowhere ran up to you on the street and said those same words, you would immediately be interested in starting a relationship?

DailyNews: This is beyond the architecture of this thread...pls don't get personal....and I will suggest Ogugua pretends she didn't saw this post...you can go to that thread they started for people to ask them questions and ask her any question with all due respect, respect their privacies.