iceblue:

guys, let's imagine that you don't have a girlfriend. na girl dey cause all these reprisals, ba? ok make we delete her for picture.

would you enjoy your mum coming around every spare second you're at home and eating up all of your personal space? i doubt it. you love her very much, no doubt, but it's called personal space. you can't share that with any other living person in this world (except your wife). i couldn't take it, my mum being all up in my space ALL of the time. my mum isn't like that (well, not really ). if she were i'd give her subtle reminders -
your husband misses you
you're not treating my father well - you're neglecting him
go and look after your husband
you're supposed to be honey mooning aren't you?

but i cannot stand her being in ALL of my space, ALL of the time. period. and i aint even a guy. guys are usually the ones who want more independence, or am i wrong?

Good talk

Okija_juju:

@ Topic

You either use juju <sub>(which I will gladly hook you up with)      

Or</sub>


You love and tolorate his mum with all you r might and strenght

_{Or you take the easy way out}

Dump him.

Boys and their mummies, thats like breaking up conjoined twins, you need surgery.  

The mother is obviously not convinced her son is ready for a committed relationship yet.

what a depressing statement.

KarmaMod:

Beware of okija. His mama dey his house 24/7

You wouldnt have to worry about my mum, We are in two different countries, and she no even get address to my crib, incase she wan visit.    

michelin89:

_{uhm like how much na?}

That wan na indoor business. Just browse our shrine website or call us on +23408099OKIJA  

~Sauron~:

We can't delete her. . . . .A man must get some.

Men want to eat momma's soup sometimes.

What if she's a widow??

Men want their independence but it's a different thing with mothers.

well dearie,

the person giving you some has needs too

i'm glad you agree it should be sometimes the rest of the time, pls enjoy your noodles and take-out

even then sef. she would cope better by engaging in several activities, not all-up-in-my-son's-space activity

hmmm. english. didn't u just claim to be independent @16? what then did that entail?

20+ is a kid. . . . .
Cheese n Rice, i wasn't even a mummy's boy at 16.

You were financially responsible and family independent at 16?

this topic interesting no be small.
the way u dey blow pigin here, i doubt you re not naija.

back to the topic,
why not be inviting him to your house,with this you can send your families out or better still  visit him ordinary day and make love as much as you want.

@ Poster,

You guys are not married, so what is your stress? If you are bothered with the mother being there, you guys can go out for a treat. Has the mother obliged following you out also?

Who says 20+ is still a kid?

spikedcylinder:

You were financially responsible and family independent at 16?

How??

On which continent??

Ehn do blood money abi Yahoo??

Or ehn win Jackpot??  

iceblue:

well dearie,
the person giving you some has needs too  

No doubt!!! She has needs but then u can't come between a man and her mother.

i'm glad you agree it should be sometimes the rest of the time, please enjoy your noodles and take-out  
even then sef. she would cope better by engaging in several activities, not all-up-in-my-son's-space activity

Mothers are protective especially with the high number of desperate females on the prowl.
Would u let your son fall into the wrong laps??

hmmm. english. didn't u just claim to be independent @16? what then did that entail?

Yes, i was.
@ 16, most decisions were mine. . . . . I don't run to ma mum for advice or opinion.
I learnt saying "No" to her at that tender age even with her emotional blackmail attempts.

spikedcylinder:

You were financially responsible and family independent at 16?

Financially responsible?? What has that gotta do with never letting ma girlfriend feel that she comes second and that ma mother always has the last word.

igwe 1:

this topic interest no be small.
the way u dey blow pigin here, i doubt you re not naija.

back to the topic,
why not be inviting him to your house,with this you can send your families out or better still visit him ordinary day and make love as much as you want.

You nor understand? him mama get radar wey she take dey detect my presence and before I know it *dling dlong* she don arrive!

Pataki:

@ Poster,

You guys are not married, so what is your stress? If you are bothered with the mother being there, you guys can go out for a treat. Has the mother obliged following you out also?

Who says 20+ is still a kid?

He can't possibly leave his house with his mum in. She is always a visitor like anyone else. So if she comes in and he has the idea of going out, it automatically means asking his mum to leave as well.

~Sauron~:

Yes, i was.
@ 16, most decisions were mine. . . . . I don't run to ma mum for advice or opinion.
I learnt saying "No" to her at that tender age even with her emotional blackmail attempts.

Thats not independence, Thats called being stubborn.

Pataki:

Who says 20+ is still a kid?

I did. He's in his early 20's prolly still in school or something. To his mother, he is still a baby.

Now bite me.

michelin89:



He can't possibly leave his house with his mum in. She is always a visitor like anyone else. So if she comes in and he has the idea of going out, it automatically means asking his mum to leave as well.

How often does the mum comes

It seems a lot of people didn't read the first post. Here it is.

He is a young man in his early twenties. Has got his job and an apartment of his own which is situated in a city 30 minutes away from his mum. However whenever his girlfriend visits (once in a month) she always accidentally meet his mother. sometimes it degenerates to the extent that all his friends happen to be present as well. To cut the long story short: the girl asked the guy for a space specifically meant for her. In a period of one month what is a weekend without a visit from your mum? Answer: you are asking for too much. That's it.

Now that girl is me and the boy happens to be my ex. I have been reasoning and it seems that in the African contest I had no right whatsoever to make such a demand. But, considering he nurtured me with so much hope for a future together, wasn't I right to recquire a special time and space from him?

ahh, but parents have that emotional blackmail thing down pat! is it part of the ante-natal talks at the hospital?

okija u no serious, LOL!

i wan close abeg! layra mehn

Okija_juju:

Thats not independence, Thats called being stubborn.

Rebellion is independence.
At that age, she knew i couldn't be bossed around ALL THE TIME.

Okija_juju:

Thats not independence, Thats called being stubborn.

lol true.

Michelin the guy is now an ex . . . find another guy who doesnt have his mom around 24/7. I also dont agree that he cant leave the house with you when his mum is there . . . he just doesnt want to.

Michelin,

Can I suggest something? You claim you need just 2 or 3 days in a month for a typical "US" time abi? Spend that time at your place.

Or do you secretly want more? I.e want his mother to delete all together?

spikedcylinder:

I did. He's in his early 20's prolly still in school or something. To his mother, he is still a baby.

Now bite me.

I won't bite you here. I prefer the bedroom biting. You know my bites are disastrous.

That said, 20+ is not a kid. Would you call yourself a kid?

michelin89:

He can't possibly leave his house with his mum in. She is always a visitor like anyone else. So if she comes in and he has the idea of going out, it automatically means asking his mum to leave as well.

Why not? You guys are still handling your issues with naivety. Better still, you guys marry one another and tell me if the mother comes visiting, you guys cannot go out and leave her at home.

Pataki:

I won't bite you here. I prefer the bedroom biting. You know my bites are disastrous.

That said, 20+ is not a kid. Would you call yourself a kid?

Pataki. . . . .

You know berra than to call me a kid.

Pataki:

Why not? You guys are still handling your issues with naivety. Better still, you guys marry one another and tell me if the mother comes visiting, you guys cannot go out and leave her at home.

I personally think that's rude. Why fail to attend to a visitor when you asked her to come?

DavidDylan:

Michelin the guy is now an ex . . . find another guy who doesnt have his mom around 24/7. I also don't agree that he can't leave the house with you when his mum is there . . . he just doesnt want to.

so all is really lost??

spikedcylinder:

Michelin,

Can I suggest something? You claim you need just 2 or 3 days in a month for a typical "US" time abi? Spend that time at your place.

Or do you secretly want more? I.e want his mother to delete all together?

We already spend some time in my house but since I don't live alone, he can't stay for the weekend.

I have got no secret plans. I have my schedule and he has his ever since summer ended, so we have seriously reduced the number of visits (twice a month alternated).

~Sauron~:

Rebellion is independence.
At that age, she knew i couldn't be bossed around ALL THE TIME.

In this case, the mother is not bossing him around. He WANTS her company.

@michelin89
I suggest you move on with your life because that boy is certified Mama' boy and you will be always be second even if you guys get married and have zillion kids together.
Living just 30mins away from his mum says it all

spikedcylinder:

In this case, the mother is not bossing him around. He WANTS her company.

Maybe the lad is just using his mother as an excuse. . . . . .
No mother would prevent her son from going out with his girlfriend.

michelin89:

You nor understand? him mama get radar wey she take dey detect my presence and before I know it *dling dlong* she don arrive!

i cant help the lafta lol
That means the mom is really doing a nice job taking care of her son.
i know she will change as soon you guys say i do at the alter

~Sauron~:

Maybe the lad is just using his mother as an excuse. . . . . .
No mother would prevent her son from going out with his girlfriend.

Hmmm!!

Good point. He was trying to use the mum to break up with her.

Okija_juju:

Hmmm!!

Good point. He was trying to use the mum to break up with her.

Silly guys!

michelin89:

so all is really lost??

All hope is lost o . . . the guy isnt ever going to change for you. Either accept his mother or delete him from your life.

tope2000:

@michelin89
I suggest you move on with your life because that boy is certified Mama' boy and you will be always be second even if you guys get married and have zillion kids together.
Living just 30mins away from his mum says it all

it doesnt say anything. Some men live with their mothers and still have plenty of "us" time with their girlfriends. the guy is just not that committed to her.

Okija_juju:

Hmmm!!

Good point. He was trying to use the mum to break up with her.  

Men and their various schemes of breaking away from their shackles.

seriously michelin i think u r exagerating ,because d mum can't be there all d time,i mean every single time u visit

sorry but i think its not d visit that is ur only prob,u r jealous of d guys feelings for his mum and d attention,shes his mum,he has d right to give her d attention and love hes giving to her now,c'mon don't give yourself unnecessary headache over one woman

whatever90:

seriously michelin i think u r exagerating ,because d mum can't be there all d time,i mean every single time u visit

sorry but i think its not d visit that is ur only prob,u r jealous of d guys feelings for his mum,shes his mu,he has d right to give her d attention and love hes giving to her now,c'mon don't give yourself unnecessary headache over one woman

I seriously doubt this too

~Sauron~:

Maybe the lad is just using his mother as an excuse. . . . . .
No mother would prevent her son from going out with his girlfriend.

Maybe or maybe not.

Thing is she (his mom) probably still pays some of his bills, cooks for him etc so she has every right to mother him. On that note, he is still HER kid.